I've had one NCNS experience with a well-known provider here and another with a provider who simply forgot to put me on her calendar. Turned out she was with another client when I showed up -oops, lol. After waiting a half-hour for a call back, I decided to just leave and no sooner did I pull away then she calls to apologize for screwing up. Long story short, we ended up meeting a half-hour later so neither of us lost out. Now that doesn't happen to often...
Was scheduled after several emails with a known and well reviewed provider in my area, I am known and well referenced- Got NSNC'd.
I guess part of the business? Never had that happen before.
I guess I now know how the providers feel when that happens to them! No way of preventing I suppose- just luck of the draw.
That happened to me only once. I had to sit in the parking lot of a hotel waiting for some cop to come by and ask me why I was sitting in a parking lot for no apparent reason. But I had to wait quite a while because if I left, I could get blacklisted as a NSNC myself.
It happened to me once this past summer, although not exactly how it happened to you. I drove 3 hours for an outcall, had booked a room, checked in for a late afternoon appointment. She called 15 minutes before the start time to tell me she couldn't make it. I had called her the night before to confirm and she said everything was fine and that we were on for our appointment.
I think it happens to all hobbyists at some point. I think it happens to all providers at some point , too.
that counts... sure many never grace this door and count them lucky. If you are NSNCed it means you take risks, don't always see the safe choice... And it won't be the last time someone fucked over your time.
It sucks so bad though. Once I had a new client book a three hour lunch and had ME pay for the room, no deposit or anything (never again- lesson learned). I called after I hadn't heard from him (he was supposed to call when he arrived for the room number) and he's like, uhhh I'm in Denver. Uggh. No reimbursement for the room either. Same guy did it a second time as well, but luckily I hadn't paid extra for a room just for him, because I was hosting incall. Then I was done with him and blacklisted his dumb @$$.. That guy was obviously getting off on messing with me. But for most, I think it's an innocent mistake Ie. if you take a nap and your alarm doesn't go off, or you forget you had an appointment, or something like an accident or a death occurs, or a last minute illness or period.. I could see a NCNS happening on occasion. On the other hand, I think it is totally inconsiderate and frustrating, and I think many but not all NCNS situations should be late-cancels as opposed to not even bothering to call. Like I said, if you get in a wreck or wind up in the hospital, you might not be able to call until later, but then at least call later and offer to make it up! And in most cases, even if you have to call 10 or 20 minutes before the start time, have the courtesy of telling the person so they aren't waiting and wondering.
I have found that while I've had some late cancels, which can be frustrating, I'm always so grateful that they had the courtesy to let me know what was going on, and most are apologetic, reliable about re-booking, and are also understanding about the late-cancel fee to compensate me for my time.
I had on situation where I was in a minor accident and was unable to make an outcall. I called right away and kept him posted on the situation, and when it looked like it wasn't going to happen for that night due to the time delay, I called and confirmed the cancellation, and then offered to pick up the hotel room myself for a date the following week. In another situation, I had a guy making a three hour drive to see me on a Saturday afternoon. I woke up early, around 8am puking my guts out. As soon as I realized that I was ill, I called him (once I momentarily stopped puking, lol) and told him, so that he could make alternate plans and not waste time driving out.
Of course it sucks to disappoint someone, and while I haven't had to same-day cancel very often- these two times and maybe one other time in six months total- it still sucks to let someone down. However, letting them know as soon as you possibly can is the respectful thing to do. While it sucks to have to tell someone you can't see them for any reason, the alternative sucks more for everyone involved. Please, people, try not to do it!!
On the other hand, I suppose it is kind of like your initiation. Congrats, goldenbear, you're no longer a newbie! Just kidding. But, indeed, we've all been there and we all feel your pain, babe! Better luck next time, and let us know of any updates in the situation. Have you tried emailing her to see what happened?
XoXo,
Marea
-- Modified on 11/5/2007 5:03:46 PM
I have been on the receiving end of NCNS. I just never attempt to call that provider again. I did have a very nice provider attempt to get in touch w/me to cancel. Unfortunately I had already driven over an hour on my way there. I pulled over and called her back, when she realized I was already on my way she made the appointment for an hour later. Thank you Catalina. She was at the hospital with a friend who was in a wreck. I told her that she should have explained that to me and we could reschedule. I felt bad. But, she is a very very nice young woman.
Yes, I did email her nicely- figuring she must have had a major problem- haven't heard back. I'll definitly feel better if she does and is sincere and certainly hope nothing is wrong for her sake. Like you said Marea, part of the experience and less of a newbie with each one!
Hardest part on this one is it was one of the very few I've booked at night because of the difficulty covering the time away from home- had the cover and then had to cover why I was home! The double life can suck!
I have to travel to see a provider & I share your frustration about having a cover setup & then not have the date work out...it sucks! Sometimes it happens & the provder can't avoid it, but it's not fun...shit then ya have to go back to work! Better luck in the future!
-- Modified on 11/6/2007 8:23:32 AM
and if the no show party doesn't even call after the fact to apologize or offer an explanation, or offer to make it up, then they're just an asshole pure and simple.
I had set up a meeting with a well known lady at a local motel... I drove around the parking lot for like an hour... I left a few messages and eventually gave up.
I was like about 10 minutes away from the hotel when my phone rang... For some reason cell reception was the culprit. I didnt get her calls in the parking lot. There were messages from her seconds after we were to meet... so...
So maybe it was a NCNS you experienced or maybe it wasn't?
I also had a situation where a new client mistyped his cell number, and the name of the hotel he gave me was one I'd never been to. When I looked it up, I realized the nearest one was in Milwaukee. I tried calling the gent and the number was bad, so I called directory assistance and discovered that that particular hotel had changed ownership and had a new name. I was then able to call the hotel and ask for my client by name on the hotel's phone line, and we realized the error and went on with the date as scheduled. So it is a good point that wrong numbers, wrong locations/directions, bad reception, etc. can be to blame.
Another time I had incall and was emailing back and forth with a client. He didn't have a cell so we were trying to work things out. One of his emails read, I'll just meet you in the lobby. I wrote back, saying no, come up so we don't attract attention, it's room 234 or whatever. His last email read "see you tomorrow at 5" so I assumed we were good. I waited forty minutes and gave up. I emailed asking what happened.. apparently he logged off and my email had crossed with his, so he was waiting in the lobby for half an hour. Simple miscommunication, but frustrating nonetheless. He got a hobby phone the next day, and I now require a cell number.
XoXo
M
I've had one NCNS experience with a well-known provider here and another with a provider who simply forgot to put me on her calendar. Turned out she was with another client when I showed up -oops, lol. After waiting a half-hour for a call back, I decided to just leave and no sooner did I pull away then she calls to apologize for screwing up. Long story short, we ended up meeting a half-hour later so neither of us lost out. Now that doesn't happen to often...
hear me now?
are that they are getting better and better at everything, but what they were intended for... Making phone calls.
Do you out her on your local board? It's up to you, but I think you should give her a couple days to possibly contact you with an explanation/apology.
GB22...I agree, ugh! Sorry to hear this! I have hobbied two of the past three evenings...successfully, with both someone I had never before, as well as my ATF this evening, so I am on top my game. In almost four yrs. of hobbying, I have not yet encountered a NCNS. I've had many delayed starts...cancellations (on both the provider and my parts), one of which was extremely painful (ATF cancelled because she wasn't feeling well, but rallied to attend an M&G, met up w/ another hobbiest afterward, whom subsequently reviewed her! Ouch!).
My only brush w/ a NCNS happende a couple of months ago, when a well regarded NYC based provider ran OT on our session, only to announce that she had another meeting afterward. 25 mins. later, while driving home, the provider in question called, and apologized for terminating the OT session...she was NCNS'd. I let her vent on the phone for the next half hour. Moral of story...this sh*t cuts both ways! Anyway, sorry again, dude...
CD
-- Modified on 11/5/2007 11:49:40 PM
I'd been chasing, (literally) a local provider trying to make a date. She's pretty young, lots of great reviews (on another site), and seems to be very popular. She pulled an NSNC on me twice and was very undependable to return calls.
This is the type of chaff that a hobbiest needs to weed out. Providers that are sharp and have their head in the game do realize that every time a married guy ventures out he runs the risk of something happening and getting caught.
A good compensation for that risk is to be there for the scheduled appointment. In my case I needed to live and learn. I do understand that things do happen, emergencies and so on, but to NSNC twice and just blow the individual off is a good way to become unemployed.
the provider was there at the hotel and I recognized her from her pics. It would have been my first time to see her so she didn't know who I was and was ignoring my calls.
As I was watching her walk across the parking lot I dialed her number. She pulled out her phone pushed a button to disconnect the call and put it back into her pocket.
She walked into a restaurant/bar next door so I waited a moment and followed her in. I dialed her number again and watched as she repeated her previous action. Apparently she and a girlfriend wanted to eat and share a little time so she blew me off.
OFF 
Unrelated "If she had looked like this I would have forgiven her" Boobiage Photo