This has probably been covered here before, but:

There's a lady I meet with who would not normally be my type but we get along well and have a good time on visits.  She will only do CBJ and now that I know that, it's OK as I'm all for people only doing what they're comfortable with.  However, I find it strange that she will pretty much expect DATY (with no dental dam).

I'm tempted to bring it up in discussion but afraid that will alienate her and I do enjoy her time.   I suppose I should just accept it for what it is although it seems like somewhat of a double standard.   Is this common practice?

She has her boundaries and weather they make sense to you or not is pretty much irrelevant. If you like her keep seeing her. I'm certainly no doctor but I don't see the difference between BBBJ and DATY as far as possible disease transmission and FWIW, most ladies I've seen who do CBJ don't allow DATY...I'd be interested in hearing from the ladies on this.

The question is whether or not you want to perform DATY (with or without a dental dam as you decide is appropriate for you).

You do not need to worry about this.  If you and she both enjoy DATY, then by all means, go for it.  If either of you don't want to engage, then that's all there to it.

There are plenty of activites to keep you both busy and happy.

I am also thinking about this as well.  I'm new to this site, and I'm wanting to see some providers.  However, I hear all this about BBBJ, DATY, BBBJCIM, and I too wonder what diseases are being spread around.  Is this something that concerns anyone else?

is that the health risks are acceptably low.

There is never zero risk.

This is the facts of life hobbyists and providers accept.

It is common for a woman to do only CBJ but still allow DATY.The thinking may be that the man has more to inject into the woman's mouth than vice versa.