TER General Board

Re: Darwin is the Enemy, here...
jayscorpio 4 Reviews 185 reads
posted

Of course... plus she's likely on the pill, etc.  I'm just saying it increases the probability of passing his genes, even if that probability remains low overall.  And evolution is a science of probability.

The good news is that evolution also takes thousands and thousands of years.  So we won't be an Idiocracy anytime soon.

Okay.

I like it when a gentleman uses a thing called 'common sense.' While, as a provider, I like to play, I also like to play cautiously. That means, I don't do things that jeopardize my safety or that of the person I am with.

So, that being said, why am I getting a slew of text messages & emails requesting 'bareback?'in a row? I don't see it being described in my reviews, but furthermore, why would anyone want to play russian roulette? Gentleman, do you prefer a provider to honestly take a chance like that? Is that more sexy? Or is having safe, sane, and consensual fun that is mutually satisfying, yet safe more appeasing? I've heard the arguments that bareback 'feels soo much better' but really, in this day and age, why risk anything more?

"self-destructive behavior?"

For various reasons, many people demonstrate self-destructive, behavior: drinking and driving, addictions, etc. Others demonstrate fool-hardy behavior, which increase the likelihood of negative outcomes: texting while driving, going significantly over the speed limit in rain and snow, etc. There will always be these people, and it's up to us as individuals to stay out of their way, as much as is humanly possible. Asking why, does not necessarily do anything to aid in that process. Though I respect your right to do so. ;)

that isn't even an argument, it's pretty much universally agreed upon...but even still, FUCK THAT.

I always find myself thinking, that when someone doesn't care about raw dogging, it's because they know they already have something and therefor have nothing to lose. A conspiracy theory I know, but I'm too suspicious of chicks who would do that to indulge. If she'll go raw with me, she's probably done it with many others, and who the fuck knows where they've been?

are they all from the same person or are you getting this from different hobbyists?  If it's just one dangerous dope, that's one thing.  If someone (or more than one provider) out there is satisfying multiple requests of this kind, that isn't good for anyone.

ErectionProtection614 reads

Ever read some of the inine posts on this board, or questions asked on the newb board? A lot of guys don't have common sense. Yes they are the minority.

I'm surprised that people actually do this, at least while they are paying for such activities.

When they try to force it upon you and when you have to use physical pressure to say no, that is not cool!

I don't know why guys are so hot after bareback.  Most whine about sensitivity (as if they haven't masturbated their ding into one solid callus already).  OK, sure, there might be a little more sensitivity, but really -- really guys?  That much more?  If you don't like the industrial strength cheapie galoshes the girl might have, you can always bring your own condoms.  Will it kill you to spend $3 extra on a several hundred dollar date?

I think the urge to bareback is actually probably mainly other things:

1) The sad sack barebacker likes to be under the delusion that he's her real one-and-only lover.  Part of the fantasy.  Yea, dude, she really secretly wants your kids.  I'm sure she uses a cover for everyone else.

2) A power thing.  It's like pushing for anal, or the jizz-to-the-eye shot.  Or something.  A way of asserting dominance.  These are the ass-dingles who got beat up in eight grade, and now must prove their manhood forcing hookers to have sex without a condom.  Nice.  Real tough.  Manly men don't do condoms, right?

Either way, the guy who wants bareback obviously doesn't give a shit whether he catches something, or passes something on.  Same with a girl who is willing to do bareback.  Both deserve each other.  The rest of us just need to avoid them.

I have been offered bareback, and used it as an excuse to walk away.  I wouldn't eat at a restaurant under warning from the health department either, or buy expired milk, or take aspirin where the container had been opened.  I wouldn't let Walgreens use old needles for my flu shot, and I don't pick used straws off the floor at McDonald's to drink my coke.  Any reputable agency owner will fire a girl that offers bareback, same as any restaurant owner should fire a cook who doesn't wash his hands. Any girl who offers bareback doesn't give a shit about herself or her other customers.

I don't do DATY either.  Mucous membrane contact is mucous membrane contact.  Noticing something on your dick and getting a shot for it is a whole lot different from a herpes sore in your mouth or eye.

TER could do more to help.  I had a session once where the condom broke.  We didn't notice until it was over that I only had the base of the condom around my shaft, and the rest was shoved up somewhere inside her.  Half an hour later, we were fooling around again, and my little willie slipped in uncovered.  She said to keep going, that we'd already broken the rule.  But it made me very uncomfortable.  My review, in which I mentioned what happened, was refused because no mention of bareback is allowed by TER.  So I removed all that stuff and the review went up (it's my most boring and uninformative review, if you're wondering).  But guys -- don't you maybe want to know about this shit?  Unless you already have something and don't care about hosting a new bug, her disease risk is more important than boob size, IMHO.  TER should cut the rule against discussing unsafe practices.  This site is all about transparency, right?

TER should also make it easy to report whether any customer gets a positive result for an STD test after the session.  Can there be an easy 'post session quick update' feature that is available a few months after the original review is posted?  I get tested regularly and thoroughly and have fortunately only personally dealt with two STDs - crab lice back in college (from a civvie), and more recently (a few years ago) a mild case of molluscum from a provider (despite condom; the molluscum was on the pubic area above the base of my penis).  But I have seen AIDS and herpes devastate lives.  You don't want that shit.  It just ain't worth it.  Providers with viral diseases need to be shut down same as a restaurant with a persistent rat or sewage problem.

Bareback does feel better, duh!  That's why if smart, we only do it with that special someone.

Is this an attempt to get us to read your reviews, or some kind of twisted self promotion?  Maybe, subconsciously this is an attempt to draw attention to yourself, but in a rather negative way. If I'm wrong, excuse me, but still think you'd be better satisfied asking the people requesting it (if any) than here.

Posted By: charlottesweet
Okay.

I like it when a gentleman uses a thing called 'common sense.' While, as a provider, I like to play, I also like to play cautiously. That means, I don't do things that jeopardize my safety or that of the person I am with.

So, that being said, why am I getting a slew of text messages & emails requesting 'bareback?'in a row? I don't see it being described in my reviews, but furthermore, why would anyone want to play russian roulette? Gentleman, do you prefer a provider to honestly take a chance like that? Is that more sexy? Or is having safe, sane, and consensual fun that is mutually satisfying, yet safe more appeasing? I've heard the arguments that bareback 'feels soo much better' but really, in this day and age, why risk anything more?

you are jumping to conclusions, albeit rather false ones. I told them that they must have an std if they are making such a proposal, and they are from an unknown area code texting my phone. Unknown area code=stranger. You=stranger. So, if I wanted to apply Aristotelean logic here, you and the unknown area code person are about equally familiar to me, meaning not at all. So, quite accusing me of attempting to acquire attention (I get plenty of positive feedback, thankyoukindly) and making me out to be some *excuse my language here* 'attention whore.' You clearly have a bug up your a** or something, and frankly, I am not in the least bit interested in engaging with you in conversation, whether it be on TER or the moon, ever again.

Good riddance.

...I personally have not shared time with either of those ladies because of what I know. I decided along time ago that I would not take part in that level of unsafe sex but I also know others seek that sort of pleasure.

In my opinion, if the female condom would only catch on, because of the BB like sensitivity that it offers, dreaming of finding a less than reputable provider might be forgotten.

If BB is out there, there are those that will seek and push and coax until they find it.

Hey Lina, at $12.47 a 10 pack, or $1.21 each, if I knew that the lady offered them I would gladly pay a " better sensitivity and sexual fun tax " just to be able to use them.

In fact, the only reason that I don't bring them along with me to each get together is because the vast majority of woman know nothing about them.

... you'd think including them wouldn't require and upsell!  LOL

Given that they offer a lot more sensitivity so a guy ... uh ... finishes ... faster, you'd think by now they'd be the default offering.

lilli275 reads

reiterating a point i made in a post prior to this one, we (females) are all formed differently...the female reproductive system is not cookie cutter. because i had heard so many positive things about the FC i decided to try them out with the Hubby first, and to say it was uncomfortable would be a vast understatement. just like every other form of insertable birth control i've tried to date, it was simply intolerable.

so while i am glad that there is an alternative to the male condom out there which works so well for so many, it is certainly not the answer for us all so will never become the "default."

I don't mean to imply that ALL providers should be using a particular device.

Every woman is different in uncountable ways. Some women get horrendous yeast infections from DATY. Some can use a silicone based lube, some can't. Some are allergic to latex male condoms and must use a different type, etc etc etc.

However, it is my belief that a great many women simply will not consider the Female Condom *at all* and won't even TRY it simply because men are compliant with the male condom model.

I am -- and have always been -- a diligent user of condoms for the entire time I have been sexually active. You can count on one finger the number of women with whom I have ever allowed unprotected sex.

Nevertheless, a great many male condoms suck. I am so danged sensitive that a girl can practically get me off with a sultry look, one finger, one minute, and one drop of lube; yet it can be quite difficult for me to achieve orgasm with some of these industrial-strength, 1/8" thick, unlubed condoms that a great many providers seem to favor employing. I am quite certain this makes a woman have to work three times as hard as she would otherwise have to work.

Men simply accept this because they have little choice because the pervasive distrust of providers in clients typically will not allow for clients to spend a few bucks and bring condoms that actually transmit some modicum of sensation. I guess providers fear that clients will damage condoms in order to catch diseases, because they want to pay child support, or whatnot.

There are a lot of solutions. I have, for example, run into some providers who actually know how to provide male condoms that work, and how to employ them in a fashion that is both safe *and* allows for them to not have to work up a 90-minute sweat to get a guy off.

Another solution certainly worth considering is the female condom. Granted, it won't work for all women. But I state my case as I do, not because I really think all women should use them; but because I think more women should at least try them and consider them as an option; especially in cases where they would distrust men bringing their own condoms or would otherwise insist on employing a condom that could be used to make effective tire repairs.

As more women use these -- or at least learn better techniques of deploying male condoms -- this will have an effect on the market ultimately improving what is available to clients who are NOT paying cheap money for a lady's time.

I think it is entirely reasonable, especially when guys are often paying more for a session than the average guy takes home to live on for a week, to start insisting that the women they are paying pay more attention to this aspect of matters.

lilli181 reads

i must admit i find it a bit shocking that so many providers put such little thought or effort into the condoms they use, however i will take your word for it as clearly you would have far greater knowledge of such than i. from age 16 on (when i began to purchase condoms myself), i have put an exhaustive amount of research and experimentation into condoms, lubes, etc., to ensure that i used what would be the safest and most pleasant for myself and my partners. so i cannot imagine a woman who engages in such activities "professionally" doing any less, that's quite frightening.

anywho John, i disagree only with your original premise that FC condoms should be employed by all, not with the idea that women should put more care and thought into the condoms they use in general.

and btw...what on earth is wrong with working up a 90 minute sweat to please one's partner? ;)


... working up a 90-minute sweat to please your partner ... so long as it isn't a 60-minute session! (*grin*) It isn't just the lady who might have time constraints.

I am thankful to be able to say that the very few women I see (and it is very few) know what they are doing and it is a non-issue for me personally at this time. Unfortunately, arriving at a place where I can see so few and enjoy them so much has required ... um ... more sampling than I'd like. And a good many are pretty clueless about the whole condom thing, imho.

If you saw what I've seen ... I think you'd be horrified.


Really, from my perspective, it felt so much like bareback I had to check.

Just had my first experience with a FC, and I agree that it felt almost like BB.  I guess we just have to start requesting them, and I'm sure the providers will quickly get up to speed on their use.

Yeah I can only imagine when a frequent BP shopper like myself tries to inquire about a FC as I am booking my appointment. LOL. It's probably hard enough having sex with a strange man let alone trying to apply and use a strange condom properly. Also I hate to say it but a lot of black women are ignorant to FCs in the business and the civvie world. The younger ones as well. And before Ms. Mocha or any other sistas crucify me for this I am black myself.

.... I learned about the F/C on my doubles meeting (reviewed) and just so happened to be a black and white provider event.

They make sense on a doubles date because you don't have the need to change a hat to move from one lady to the next.

Lol why was I even pointed out? Was I just racially profiled or something? lol. ALSO I'm not going to get into arms because my skin is brown thank you much. Maybe it's a lot of black women YOU KNOW perhaps? Because ALL of the ones I know sure know know about the FC, young and old. And kind of just saying .... I have known about the FC for at least 10 yrs (yay sex ed). If you're worried about being crucified it's nothing wrong with speaking your mind but maybe mind your speech just a little bit more.

Posted By: jlart123
Yeah I can only imagine when a frequent BP shopper like myself tries to inquire about a FC as I am booking my appointment. LOL. It's probably hard enough having sex with a strange man let alone trying to apply and use a strange condom properly. Also I hate to say it but a lot of black women are ignorant to FCs in the business and the civvie world. The younger ones as well. And before Ms. Mocha or any other sistas crucify me for this I am black myself.

I know of a few ladies personally that make this claim.

Although if I were doing guide on how to I would say:

1) Get a toy

2) Lube it up

3) Put condom on said toy

4) Insert the toy

5) Pull it out and replace with real version

xoxo

Lina

... I think such a link would imply an intention to have sex, so wouldn't work before a *first* date with a provider; but might work for subsequent dates.

:-)

Try extasy or inpsiral as they both allow for better sensation due to the loose at the end of your dick design,  but they are tighter at the base so I have yet to loose one.

... however, the rest of us -- including you, thank goodness -- are under no obligation to join them in their quest for death.

There could be a million reasons for this; but overall men engage in risky behavior with far greater prevalence than women; and hence are more likely to die from accidents, etc. in every age group.

Actually, this is a quirky case where Darwin is working against us.  The risky behavior, in this case, is BBFS, which actually increases the probability that the risk-taker's genes will be passed on.  It doesn't matter if the guy gets an STD and dies of an infection after the fact, as long as the women survive and bear his children.

Many people forget that Darwin is about procreation, not death.  Hence, once idiots have children, it's already too late for our buddy Darwin to save us.

If the women dont' want his spawn, they'll get it vacuumed out. If they do keep accidental babies, good luck supporting them on their own dime.

Of course... plus she's likely on the pill, etc.  I'm just saying it increases the probability of passing his genes, even if that probability remains low overall.  And evolution is a science of probability.

The good news is that evolution also takes thousands and thousands of years.  So we won't be an Idiocracy anytime soon.

The human race has been an "Idiocracy" for quite some time. Read this board if you don't believe me, there are plenty of idiots here.

There is no accounting for stupid. I know it exists but I don't understand it.

I do not object to CBJ and never expect, or want, bare back.  I do prefer DFK and find the experience much less enjoyable without it.  I agree with you.  Why play Russian Roulette?

Don't worry, your not the only one getting those calls...deny, delete and move on...

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