for 14 years, and we did really like each other,but eventually it fell apart.

as long as your big head's screwed on right ... and your little heads screwed even better. I'm mad about my current flame. I'd sell my ....
but it is what it is ... a fantasy.

I've been seeing some of my clients for years - some more than ten (!).  Unsurprisingly, these are relationships that keep both of us engaged and happy without ever crossing over into uncertain emotional territory.  Every once in a while I end a relationship because the client has emotional needs beyond the scope of what I can offer - but that scenario has thankfully been a rarity.  

Unless you want variety. So.. there are two types of hobbysts.. ones that seek variety and ones that seek stability and development. You shouldn't overthing attachment aspect. That's not the marriage. From realation with a provider who can walk fairly easily. Xo

an equally important concern is complacency.  I have seen some providers pretty regularly until it felt like I was being taken for granted and the sessions were more paint by numbers than a high energy good time.  

Every so I often I find myself in one of those "familiarity breeds contempt" situations where a regular client starts getting overly casual - usually about scheduling and cancellations.  It's a bummer, but a few strikes in and I know it's time to call it quits.

I would agree that there are benefits of being a regular.  I have experienced those benefits.Lol  there are also disadvantages of being a regular.  I see several traveling ladies and there have been times when all three were in town at the same time and I was contacted by all three asking me If I wanted to meet. I don't know if they all realized that I was white listed by them and wanted to get a piece of the pie before it was all gone.lol

Usually that's the guy who asks the girl for a date. Perhaps you should not pay too much attention to them. Xo

Then there are also a few traveling gals I see once or twice a year.

The only reason I saw either of them 8 times was their appearance and performance, their talents/menu fit into my needs/wants.

I rather seeing a client that I've met before then a new one, I feel more comfortable and in a way I know you.  

spent time with. I prefer to repeat when the service is very good and beyond.

Especially a few who are utr and 1-2 who have retired but will still visit occasionally.  Do love to venture out from time to time.

Sophia, I think this is just a sign of how comfortable they are with me. Sometime I haven't seen them in months and the meeting gives each of us a chance to talk about things since our last meeting. It is difficult when they all ask for a visit at the same time because I like them all equally and sometimes I am short on time and money and so I have the difficult task of choosing to see one over the other.

While the excitement of surprise can be fun, regulars is the only way to go. Plus with regulars, there tends to be a lot of added perks. But regulars retire, so don't forget to see a new lady now and then.  

In my home town, I see several ladies regularly.  The difficulty is choosing who next.  I like seeing ladies I have seen before. A lot of the time, having been away for a month or so,  adds some great anticipation and makes getting back together very exciting.

If you feel you want to drive the rental home and keep it, turn it in.

And I encourage healthy, boundary-aware attachment. I develop a true affection for my friends, and love having them in my life. If I sense that a gent may not understand boundaries very well, which I gauge during the screening process, I will simply not see him.

Achieving balance, so I find that doing both keeps me happy and helps maintain perspective.  Having emotional bonds with regulars can lead to crossing of lines but for seeing a new face weekly that serves as a reminder that all of my regulars were once that "new face."

Being close with several ladies...just the way the hobby flows for me.  

It's quite peculiar that I was overwhelmingly poor at picking women in my civie life, and yet I'm really damn good at it in my hobby life. Well, then I guess civie women don't come with reviews, do they? Hey, there's a way I could make my next mil, I could come up with a dating service that the participants could review each other. Then those self proclaimed "classy" women, you know the ones that I mentioned previously who say they are too classy to suck cock, well they would be exposed as the hags which they are.

Sarah, your posts are always terrific and so I thought I would try to get a sense from you what exactly the typical boundaries are?  And I know there may well be no 'typical boundaries' but a general sense of what you think they should be would be helpful.

So you're saying it's all about marketing and only marketing.  Sarah seems to be saying something else.  Interesting stops along the spectrum of what might make for a boundary.  

and that is to let it play itself out.  

I enjoy a wide variety of shapes, sizes, colors, and menu experiences, so I go more for variety.  

Mainly the fee for my time is the biggest boundary. Also, we play within a garden inside the walls of which anything can happen. But we will never engage outside of those walls. Just won't happen. My life is arranged in a particular way for which that is not an option. The only thing we are likely to ever do outside of the garden walls is carry on an email/social media relationship. I'll care for you as far as that relationship allows: I'll feel awful if something happens to you and you end up in a hospital, but I won't show up at the hospital. That's not my place. Does that make sense? And in almost every single case, OTC blurs the lines.  

They never have in almost 20 years. I'm really good at screening and communication.

So well put, as always.  Gagambler too.  Thank you both for some really good insights.

I now have three different ladies that I see on a regular basis, and that's enough for me.  It keeps me from getting too attached to any one of them, but the repeats nurture a more intimate relationship.  I can email or text them every now and then, and they do the same for me.  I even have the real name and real life email of one.  But they know that even if they were to start a relationship with me, it wouldn't be exclusive.  I don't own them and they don't own me.  So we can exchange "I love you" without it being a threat.