I am seeking the opinions of PROVIDERS ONLY on this question.

How young is too young?  The youngest provider I have seen claimed to be 18, but was probably really 20 or 21.  I have no interest in having sex with children, and assumed she would not be as young as she claimed to be on the phone, and indeed that turned out to be the case.

My own personal answer to my own question is that she is old enough if she knows what she is doing, in other words if she is making a well thought out and carefully considered decision to do this as a way to earn money.  If it looks like she is being pimped, I'm not interested (that's one of the reasons I like TER - fewer women here are being pimped).  I want to be sure that it is HER decision, with no pressure from someone else.

But how old does a woman have to be to be capable of making it her own decision, and to really know what she is doing?  I know that it undoubtably varies from woman to woman, but what age do you providers think would be "old enough" as a general guideline?

Is 18 old enough? 20? 21? Older?

I would really appreciate your input on this.  Again, providers only please.

I have known providers as young as 21 who have been in this biz for some time with a certain amount of strength and maturity beyond their tender years. And some who are my age or older who display a complete lack of emotional and intellectual substance.


I think at any age you have to be completely capable of making your own desicions. And to be aware of the rewards and consequences. Expecially in this business. Unfortunately some young girls are lured in by the money and seem to lose themselves in all of this.


For me personally, being the mother of a teenager...and having so many youngsters in my house all the time, It pains me to see girls so young in the biz. I started so late and had so much of the world behind me that I am able to make concious desicions about things that I am not sure girls 18, 19, 20 or 21 years old can make. Yes there are exceptions to every rule...and I know some ladies might take offense to what I am saying, and for that I am sorry.

I don't think I could have truly appreciated or had the respect for this business and the people who engage in it from both sides, the way I do without the laps around the block I had taken before hand.


But as always this is just my opinion. And it is one in which I think late teens, very early 20's is too young.


xoxox
Lass

Having seen more than my share of young uns, I've gravitated to the more mature.

All 18-20 year olds but one thought it only required the mechanical, Webster's defined acts to satisfy a man. They had no idea of what is a GFE. And, 'kiss' was on a page that had been ripped out of the dictionary.

They were simply trying the business 'for the money' on a trial basis and are no longer advertising. i.e. gave up (??)

Some girls may be mature enough but I sincerely doubt it will be me who will make that determination.

I gravitate towards providers who are 30+ in age.  The main reason for this is that they tend to have maturity, outlook and professionalism that is more of a turn-on for me than the hard body and awesome looks that are associated with younger providers.  As I've aged my big head has taken over from my little head as the object of satisfaction, and as a result my requirements have changed from outright stunningly beautiful (although that's OK if part of the equation) to reasonably attractive AND intelligent.  Nobody is perfect (least of all me) and the imperfections that time heaps on us all does not necessarily make, for me, a bad choice in provider.  Usually it makes them, as I believe it has me, more human, more sensitive to others needs, and therefore a better provider.  

That said, the chronological age of a provider could have nothing to do with maturity at all. Maturity is part intellectual, part environmental, and part experiential, among other things.  The right combination of this can probably be found in people of any age.  At age 21 I found myself in the US Army, as a platoon leader, responsible for 64 other lives, in Vietnam.  I had to grow up in a hurry.  Not that it's the same as what a provider may have been through, but there are factors whereby people grow up faster than the chronometer, so to speak.  This is why I like to talk a little bit to providers before the plunge.  By the way, there is one provider local to me, age 22, that is very mature for her age, has her head screwed on correctly, and is great fun to be with vertically and horizontally.  There's the exception for me.

I have seen have clearly entered the business as a quick way to make a lot of money.  One thing that really struck me about them was how little respect they had for the business or for their clients.  It's almost amusing how puritanical their attitudes toward sexuality are.  However, it is partly their naivete that makes them appealing to me.  The most fun for me is when they try to seem sophisticated - to an older man, it's often really cute.  

Of course, the real issue is whether they understand the consequences as well as the rewards, and whether by losing themselves in doing this, they might be setting themselves up to pay too heavy a price down the road.  

It also strikes me that they may be expecting to marry, settle down, and have children later, and may not understand the effects that being in the business may have on their ability to do this successfully.  I'm talking of course, about having to either hide their past from their SO (not a good thing for the relationship), or tell him, in which case there will be potential problems in the relationship.  

So many of the providers who enter the business at an age older than their very early twenties, and especially when in their thirties, seem to have a much more realistic idea of the consequences in terms of its effect on future relationships, and have decided that they are OK with it, and so I would say have made a well thought out and carefully considered decision to go into the business.

you are asking for only providers opinions I think you are missing out on a great many intelligent perspectives by not getting a hobyists point of view also. They are the ones who spend the intimate time with these girls and see up close and personal whether or not the biz has a positive or negative effect.

What I have learned in the last couple of years is that there is so much to gain and lose by becoming a provider. I lost a job because of this. But I have gained some of the most incredible friendships that will last a lifetime. I can count on one hand and have fingers left over the people who have been my "friends" outside this business and have always been there for me. Yet the ones within this hobby who have been steadfast for 3 years is more than I can count.

I would have never been able to do this in my 20s, and I think back at how I looked and probably could have been very successful. But as I look in the mirror now at my large body and the early signs of crows feet *ugh* I realize that what makes me who I am are my experiences and my ablility to distinguish between the emotions that sometimes get in the way.

I have learned that I can truly adore some of the gents I see, care for them and their lives and familys without getting overly involved. I wouldn't have been able to do that when I was much much younger. I know ladies of all ages who became involved in this biz to find a mate. Some have been successful but the vast majority have not. This goes back to my original statement that maturity is not based on age, but the individual.

xoxo
Lass

I agree with CelticLass 21 with maturity.  I do not have kids so I cannot really base my opinion with all honesty. We know young girls have voluntary intercourse between the age 13-15 yr old  but there are laws to consider State to State (17 some 18 some 21) If a provider is between 17-21 and decided to do it on her own it is not our decision to say if she can or can not do. I do not agree to any man having sex with any one under 21, because wanting sex with a young girl while she is still trying to figure out what the heck to do with her life seems a little crazy to me.


-- Modified on 9/16/2002 8:53:34 AM

LOL I am sure all the ladies laugh I know it made me feel great that there is some jealous here from the guys....

I'm supprise riker haven't replied...Since he will make it a point to point out all the ladies he would like to have to himself.




-- Modified on 9/16/2002 2:11:32 PM

I'm not a provider, so I'm not "allowed" to respond to this question.

I just thought I'd mention, that as I age, I get more interested in younger women's bodies and LESS in older women (whether or not they display maturity and experience) because of their bodies alone. It's like, my preferences are reverse-aging as I forward-age. Funny hunh? Anyway, this means I know the advantages of experience and still turn it down.

Just an interesting point, is all.

But then, I wasn't "allowed" to respond, so nobody is "allowed" to read it anyway, right?

But, for different reasons. I know how I was at 18, & it wasn't mature enough to be in this business. Today, I know how to stand up for myself and allow myself to be pressured into anything I don't want to do (you'd be surprised at how many try to get me to blow off school stuff).

I also would be concerned about the maturity level in dealing with different personalities and the inevitable partying that comes w/having $ at that age. I worked in a bar at 18, but it was ran by my family, so I wasn't able to go play. But, I saw plenty of girls that did. & they got into some nasty stuff & made some bad habits.

While this business is ultimately a choice. I sometimes wonder at the pressures exerted upon women that don't know any better, or that have managed to hook themselves up w/less than desirable individuals. Who will take advantage of youth, & the lack of wisdom that goes with it.

Be good to each other,
Lisa

But what at age do you desire since you know the advantages of experience and still turn it down. I'm in my mid 30's and I'm curious to know.



-- Modified on 9/17/2002 9:26:07 AM

By no means do I think I'm gods gift to women, women are gods gift to me.  But the question of how young is to young, I've been with older providers that had no grip on reality and younger ones that have it all figured out. But to not see a provider because she is to young is ageist as is not seeing a provider because she is older.  Case by case.

Dude, If you dont want to hear what the guys have to say, just dont read them.  Quit being the Disscusion Board Cop!

Personally I feel that it isn't a matter of age, it is a matter of personality maturity.  Some people are just as immature to relate to at 50 as they are at 15 while others, such as my personal ATF, can easily converse sensibly on nearly any subject even when fairly young.  I also agree with John Denver that "A woman is the sweetest fruit that God ever put on the vine and I'd no more love just one kind of woman than drink only one kind of wine."

have an empathetic attitude toward clients without becoming overly emotionally involved.  I'm inclined to agree that the ability to do that often comes with age.  

Interesting too to hear about how you have made more true friends inside the business than outside.  Seems like shared experiences often lead to the best friendships.  

And I find the TER community to be a very interesting one.

But why do you say you would never have been able to do this in your early twenties?  Do you mean you would not have wanted to do it, or that if you had done it you wouldn't have been able to handle it, or what?

and end up being pressured into the business.  An abundance of money plus a drug-doing boyfriend can of course lead to the young woman doing drugs before she's old enough to understand how harmful drug use can be.  

I always thought that a lot of party-girl behavior on the part of young women was rooted in the woman having had neglectful parents as a child.  

still trying to figure out what to do with her life?  When you say "crazy", do you really mean that it is morally wrong, or that the guy must be a sicko, or what exactly?  

I would certainly agree that it is sick to want to have sex with a child, but my interest is in learning what age you providers think makes a provider still a child.  

Sounds from your reply that you feel that 21 is the age.  I'm interested in hearing the opinions of other providers on this.

I appreciate that it varies greatly from person-to-person, but let's say we are talking about an average woman, who is neither exceptionally mature nor exceptionally immature.  How young is too young?  Do you other providers agree that it is 21?

SYO ... it seems like you want to have a personal discussion with the providers and yourself on this subject.   Any idea on what gives you the god given right to demand this in a public forum?

Eric Burdon when he was with War was much more pithy: "Spill the wine, take that pearl".

To answer your question 16 is to young and 17-21 is legal if she choose to have sex. I also mention in my aboved post that young girls are having sex at the age of 13-15 and I do not agree to any child between the age of 13-15 nor 17-21 having sex with a man over 26 so my 2ct. wouldn't matter anyway.  Please do not take offense to my personal opinion which I should not have posted and I apologize if I offended you.

In your above post you agreed that very young women are often not strong enough.


-- Modified on 9/16/2002 11:34:27 PM

in her opinion the answer to the question "How young is too young to be a provider?" is 21.

We are tlaking now about a different question: "How young is too young for a young woman to have sex?",  and as I understand it you are saying that 17-21, and even 13-15, would be OK if the man was under 26.  From my perspective, under 17 or so would not be a good idea, regardless of the age of the man.

Don't ever think that your 2 cents doesn't matter.

Re:I understand it you are saying that 17-21, and even 13-15, would be OK if the man was under 26.  

Sweetie!! I said nothing of the kind, but as I mention in my aboved post that I do not agree to any man having sex with any one under 21 even if he is under 26 or over 26 no matter what his age is and if he desire to seems a little crazy to me and yes the guy must be a sicko.



-- Modified on 9/17/2002 9:17:45 AM

-- Modified on 9/17/2002 9:29:25 AM

Girls are not interesting in any way. Now.... a woman.... there is someone worth paying attention to!