All my life I thought that other people were able to hurt me. It wasn't until I divorced that I realized that what I thought in the past was hurt by others was just anger I was feeling for being betrayed, and that the only people who can hurt me are ones I love or care for. The deeper the love, the more potential for hurt. My ex hurt me something fierce with this divorce.
That's one reason I decided to go with providers. Everyone I know has been telling me to meet someone else, but I don't want to. I don't want that pain. With a provider, it's a business relationship, albeit an intimate (and hot) one. There's a provider I've been seeing the last couple of months who I really enjoy. Last week I realized that she had the potential to hurt me. Not hurt me to the extent that a real love could, but still hurt me. It was at that point I realized I had to change the nature of the relationship, and go Michael Corleone on it. Strictly business, and don't get attached. If I can't do that, then I have to stop seeing her, and stop seeing anyone else I develop feelings for. Then the "hurt" is just the same type of betrayal I've experienced with so-called friends in business, and I can deal with it differently. As I read threads written by guys who think they're in love with providers, or who are asking about being in love or getting married to one or whatever, I realize that these guys are probably setting themselves up for the real hurt that comes from having feelings for someone. That is just so dangerous, and I hope those guys are able to be aware of that. It took just one little thing for me to realize where I was headed, and I'm glad I realized it and changed my way of thinkingbut dude, you are putting up some serious walls here, I hope you eventually get over what this woman did to you and start living again. Yes, there is always the opportunity for getting hurt in life, but sometimes that's what makes life worth living. You sound like you have it really bad, I hope you get over it some day.
For the record, I am guarded, but I am still human, and still capable of falling in love again, Do I look for it? No, but I prepared to embrace it if it happens to come my way, Does that mean that I might ever get married again? Not fucking likely, and I guaranfuckingtee you that I will never get divorced again, If it ever comes to that, there is this little place in Costa Rica called Crocodile Bridge, and as the saying goes, accidents do happen. loo
I get what he is saying and I've been there but just like you I'm not completely devoid of the fact that I could find love again.
I read both hobbyist and providers on here stating they are happy to be alone all the time. Yet they are constantly on a fuck board giving/getting reviews. If you are on here it's simply a different type of courting for a one night stand and not because they are happy to be a hobbit.
Everytime I hear the "happy to be alone" statement I can only think that person has closed themselves off to possible happiness. OR they are simply off in the head and the only reason they can't find someone that can make them happy is they run off the possible suitor for fear of getting hurt.
All in all this is where you rent a hooker, fuck her and go home. This is not a dating site and you wont find that SO stability here. So find one, fuck one and go home.
than go thru a divorce again. Hey, but you don't even have to make it look like an accident.
But what I really wanted to say is that: If anybody is gonna hurt me. It's gonna be myself.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6u8r-9XQF0s
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CZVwhVTNTo
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for DUMMIES. The Doc who was taking care of my meds while I was in Maine suggested I look at that book.
Months before I heard mention that CBT was very effective while watching the Charlie rose series on The Brain.
You might find some interesting concepts in the book, feelings aren't facts, "...your thinking or beliefs lie between the event and your ultimate feelings and actions. your thoughts beliefs and the meanings that you give to an event, produce your emotional and behavioral responses."
Its an easy read, pack full of suggestions, covers many very common examples that one can start to use.
Best
Deprived
everyone processes feelings and approaches relationships in the same manner as you do.....
Some people can actually fall in love with a hooker or a civvie, doesn't matter, and have a relationship and yet not get devastated if they break up..
It seems you are just afraid to live life to the fullest...
When you are old and on your death bed, do you want to look back and think to yourself.. "Geez..I wish I had pursued that relationship.. I really like that chic..."
Live life to the fullest my man.....
Check out of HeartBreak Hotel already !!!
-- Modified on 10/29/2013 12:33:22 PM
CurlyW, GaGambler, the divorce did hit me hard. 40+ years with someone only to be kicked in the nuts is hard to take.
I know I"m being overly protective of myself by trying to make sure I don't get involved again. At some point I'll probably be ready.
But...I know that any relationship I get into isn't going to be with a hot twenty-something or thirty-something. I'm a lot of things, but not an old fool. I'll enjoy being with the hot providers, have fun and everything else, but I won't leave myself open to being used and hurt. Ain't gonna happen.
Sharphedin, I don't watch zit movies. 
Lungman, it's not a soap opera. How many times a week does some guy post here that he's falling in love with his ATF? How many of those guys are going to wind up broke, hurt, pissed off or all three? How many times do they need to be reminded that this is business?
There is nothing wrong with putting up some wall to protect your still broken heart for a period of time, but at some point you have to start living again. don't let those walls stay up forever, you will regret not having lived a lot more than you will ever regret getting hurt.
The "when" is only for you to deicide. Just don't make it after it's too late, we only have so much time on this earth, we owe it too ourselves to make every day count.
In the meantime sticking with women that you will least likely end up in a "real" relationship might be the best idea. If you know you will never have a real relationship with a 20 something, maybe those are the types you should see, this way you are protecting yourself from yourself, and still having fun in the meantime. Just a thought.
As for myself, even in my mid fifties I know the ONLY women I might end up in a serious relationship are hotties in their twenties or thirties, I don't find women my own age the least bit attractive, but I don't fall in love easily, and I am completely aware of both my strengths and my weaknesses, so I am not too concerned about having my heart broken. and If I do, I will pick myself up and go on with my life.
As for myself, even in my mid fifties I know the ONLY women I might end up in a serious relationship are hotties in their twenties or thirties, I don't find women my own age the least bit attractive, but I don't fall in love easily, and I am completely aware of both my strengths and my weaknesses, so I am not too concerned about having my heart broken. and If I do, I will pick myself up and go on with my life.
But I will say this. The time I spend with these young women makes me happier than I've been since I was in my early 20's. Just lying there looking at them, running my hands over their curves, their velvety skin, smelling their scents, the feel of their hair...that really makes me happy. I know the GFE isn't real, but the girls are real. It's not just the sex I enjoy. It's being able to look at and feel something so beautiful. I only wish I could afford to do it more often.
Actually I saw this on a shirt in a store window in Hollywood. I went Wow! nice.
It said: "Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today". James Dean
-- Modified on 10/29/2013 2:07:58 PM
this place is turning into a friggen soap opera!!
Is this really the place?
How about an on-line shrink!!
Clearly, he is suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder. Don't worry, folks, soon "Dungy The Mangina" will be back, along with "Dungy The Stalker," "Dungy The Gameless", "Dungy The Inept Picture Poster," and, of course, "Dungy The Ass Clown."
He recently won this award and is extremely proud of himself
Holy shit.... How do I cum back from this..He's right...
Cud u type somthing up from me?
You don't.. You just go away...
I need to buy a new trophy case. This one's full.
What is worse: Being hurt, or not being capable of being hurt?
Think about it a while before you answer.
I couldn't agree more with you 89Springer. I have no interest in women as a companion anymore. I need to take care of myself and won't risk a relationship that will take half of what I have left, again.
In the VERY unlikely event that I met an attractive woman my own age who had as much (or more) to lose than I do, I might think about it. For me, it's not the emotional risk, it's the financial one.
The one's I meet are either crazy, have too much baggage, or I am just not attracted to.
Once you reach a certain age, we all have baggage. Truth be told, I would be more worried about a woman in her thirties or older who had never been married, had kids etc. Who in their right mind get to be that old without acquiring some baggage along the way? Those are the really scary ones IMO.
I probably have the least baggage of anyone I know my age, while I have been married once before, I have no kids, and no real baggage to speak of, except of course the fact that I drink like a fish, gamble way more than a person should, have the attention span of a gnat and love to fuck at least a half a dozen different women a week. See what happens when you have no baggage??? lol
And maybe better I learned it now than later. I'm in the (35-45) bracket. I know my posts was probably referenced to in this thread. No, I don't have baggage, been single since I started the hobby.
I'm ok now with the lady re: OTC time. She finally responded and just said in four words if I wanted to see her. I just said I'll keep in touch. What actually happened was my ATF retired and I realized I had fallen for her first time I saw her and then stayed away 2 years, then came back and it developed until I think of her every week, and I know I'm not the only one in the ter clientele like that.
Then my ATF dream woman retired ...with a LXG TER guy. Then cut off all bridges. Maybe it's better this way. Now I'm forewarned not to develop this kind of crush again. And actually I'm not a stupid to repeat too many times now like I did before.
So I'm surviving. I've heard the ad nauseum "its just p4p" since the ordeal but I also do know some providers retire with their choice of client (among hundreds or thousdands) and a lot of guys dream about it, as some providers pm me they get propositioned to elope all the time, so I call bs on all the hobby rules sometime or another, as there are exceptions. Maybe as hard as winning a lottery, but there you go. Peace all
I wasn't referencing you specifically. There seems to be at least one or two threads a week by guys who are in love with providers, or who are wondering how to get to be "the one".
There's a lot of good-looking women who aren't providers, and who marry guys. I'm sure that many of them are hellcats in bed, too. Sometimes there's guys on this forum who just seem to have a yearning to be the one the provider falls for. Maybe it's an ego thing. I don't know. It's just unusual. Nobody ever says they specifically want to marry a restaurant hostess.
this attempt to get close to, or become friends with, or hang out with OTC. or see 30 times in one year, or spend over night with...you are not getting all of an escort as a person. she is acting and only giving you what she wants to. Many times you read posts where guys say they dont want a civvie relationship then expect that type of relationship with the same escort. If you really like the NSA aspect why do you see the same lady over and over?
I'm ok now with the lady re: OTC time. She finally responded and just said in four words if I wanted to see her. I just said I'll keep in touch. What actually happened was my ATF retired and I realized I had fallen for her first time I saw her and then stayed away 2 years, then came back and it developed until I think of her every week, and I know I'm not the only one in the ter clientele like that.
Then my ATF dream woman retired ...with a LXG TER guy. Then cut off all bridges. Maybe it's better this way. Now I'm forewarned not to develop this kind of crush again. And actually I'm not a stupid to repeat too many times now like I did before.
So I'm surviving. I've heard the ad nauseum "its just p4p" since the ordeal but I also do know some providers retire with their choice of client (among hundreds or thousdands) and a lot of guys dream about it, as some providers pm me they get propositioned to elope all the time, so I call bs on all the hobby rules sometime or another, as there are exceptions. Maybe as hard as winning a lottery, but there you go. Peace all.
Out and date . You seem like a nice guy , yeah like a lot of you guys here . And things didn't work out but being in like or being in love is nice . I just think you owe it to yourself to try again . Please don't take offense but Fuck your ex wife , don't be bitter , yeah I know easier said than done but you don't ever have to marry again or even live with a woman . But there are too many guys who do just what your doing .
Look, what I'm saying is it seems like you like having someone , hell who doesn't . Guy your still hurt and when you find a woman who cares for you the hurt will go away . She didn't deserve you , but if your gonna go all MC , don't quit on love . Hope you get what I'm trying to say , and good luck ....hey talk to the provided tell her how you feel maybe she can help you if yo guys are close , girls dig guys who have gf s , let her be your fake one !! Go out with her and meet other girls then break up ( false break up ) and date get your confidence back , bet you still got a lot of good years ahead . Again hope you get what I'm saying and best of luck 2 u ....
That's one reason I decided to go with providers. Everyone I know has been telling me to meet someone else, but I don't want to. I don't want that pain. With a provider, it's a business relationship, albeit an intimate (and hot) one.
There's a provider I've been seeing the last couple of months who I really enjoy. Last week I realized that she had the potential to hurt me. Not hurt me to the extent that a real love could, but still hurt me.
It was at that point I realized I had to change the nature of the relationship, and go Michael Corleone on it. Strictly business, and don't get attached. If I can't do that, then I have to stop seeing her, and stop seeing anyone else I develop feelings for. Then the "hurt" is just the same type of betrayal I've experienced with so-called friends in business, and I can deal with it differently.
As I read threads written by guys who think they're in love with providers, or who are asking about being in love or getting married to one or whatever, I realize that these guys are probably setting themselves up for the real hurt that comes from having feelings for someone.
That is just so dangerous, and I hope those guys are able to be aware of that. It took just one little thing for me to realize where I was headed, and I'm glad I realized it and changed my way of thinking.
where is Dr. Fucking Phil when you need him the most..
and trying to get her to marry him.
providers: "We don't pay providers to have sex with us, we pay them to leave when we are finished."
This is the oldest profession known to mankind for a reason.
The general thread was DATY with a provider .
I replied that she's a hooker , she's a prostitute and my face is not going near a hookers pussy . My tounge is not licking a vagina of a hooker . I don't know if she did bareback a half hour ago with another dude. I don't know if that snatch was washed after Joe Blow left . High dollar, Backpage slut it does not matter - a hooker is a hooker or prosititute by any way you look at it . I call a spade a spade - sorry .....
When I see a hooker she is and ALWAYS will be that and nothing more !!!
Straight up.
She is a paid fucking whore, hooker, slut, prostitute that I paid for MY enjoyment for the hour or whatever.
When you fall for some bullshit fantasy of GFE than you my friend are set up for a heartache of varying degrees of your misguided illusion .
You did it to yourself my friend.
Repeat after me ...... She is a hooker. She is a slut. She is a prostitute . She is a complete stranger I know nothing about. She is a whore I called and choose with the aforementioned known to me going into the fuck fest!
I just don't understand the gentleman here being disillusioned by three letters -GFE !
Whatever ....... I only see them as a paid whore so I have no chance of a hooker crossing over to my heart and world - that's what REAL civie relationships are for - DUH !!!
That's one reason I decided to go with providers. Everyone I know has been telling me to meet someone else, but I don't want to. I don't want that pain. With a provider, it's a business relationship, albeit an intimate (and hot) one.
There's a provider I've been seeing the last couple of months who I really enjoy. Last week I realized that she had the potential to hurt me. Not hurt me to the extent that a real love could, but still hurt me.
It was at that point I realized I had to change the nature of the relationship, and go Michael Corleone on it. Strictly business, and don't get attached. If I can't do that, then I have to stop seeing her, and stop seeing anyone else I develop feelings for. Then the "hurt" is just the same type of betrayal I've experienced with so-called friends in business, and I can deal with it differently.
As I read threads written by guys who think they're in love with providers, or who are asking about being in love or getting married to one or whatever, I realize that these guys are probably setting themselves up for the real hurt that comes from having feelings for someone.
That is just so dangerous, and I hope those guys are able to be aware of that. It took just one little thing for me to realize where I was headed, and I'm glad I realized it and changed my way of thinking.
Look up the definition of insanity.
I replied that she's a hooker , she's a prostitute and my face is not going near a hookers pussy . My tounge is not licking a vagina of a hooker . I don't know if she did bareback a half hour ago with another dude. I don't know if that snatch was washed after Joe Blow left . High dollar, Backpage slut it does not matter - a hooker is a hooker or prosititute by any way you look at it . I call a spade a spade - sorry .....
When I see a hooker she is and ALWAYS will be that and nothing more !!!
Straight up.
She is a paid fucking whore, hooker, slut, prostitute that I paid for MY enjoyment for the hour or whatever.
When you fall for some bullshit fantasy of GFE than you my friend are set up for a heartache of varying degrees of your misguided illusion .
You did it to yourself my friend.
Repeat after me ...... She is a hooker. She is a slut. She is a prostitute . She is a complete stranger I know nothing about. She is a whore I called and choose with the aforementioned known to me going into the fuck fest!
I just don't understand the gentleman here being disillusioned by three letters -GFE !
Whatever ....... I only see them as a paid whore so I have no chance of a hooker crossing over to my heart and world - that's what REAL civie relationships are for - DUH !!!
That's one reason I decided to go with providers. Everyone I know has been telling me to meet someone else, but I don't want to. I don't want that pain. With a provider, it's a business relationship, albeit an intimate (and hot) one.
There's a provider I've been seeing the last couple of months who I really enjoy. Last week I realized that she had the potential to hurt me. Not hurt me to the extent that a real love could, but still hurt me.
It was at that point I realized I had to change the nature of the relationship, and go Michael Corleone on it. Strictly business, and don't get attached. If I can't do that, then I have to stop seeing her, and stop seeing anyone else I develop feelings for. Then the "hurt" is just the same type of betrayal I've experienced with so-called friends in business, and I can deal with it differently.
As I read threads written by guys who think they're in love with providers, or who are asking about being in love or getting married to one or whatever, I realize that these guys are probably setting themselves up for the real hurt that comes from having feelings for someone.
That is just so dangerous, and I hope those guys are able to be aware of that. It took just one little thing for me to realize where I was headed, and I'm glad I realized it and changed my way of thinking.
It came back as .......
Being disillusioned by three letters - GFE
You weren't flamed for DATY. Hey, even bad DATY is not always terrible. Maybe up there with: there is no such thing as a bad BJ?--which, of course there is such a thing as a bad BJ--or, so I've heard….but….digressing.
You were flamed (if you can even call it that--the bar around here is pretty high for flaming), for being a guy, being a total dickhead.
And, apparently, whatever it is that has yer tighty-whities bunched-up is still stuck in there…..lol…
Are you offended that some men see you as only a hooker?
Are you somehow in a world that you fantasize you are a "companion" that is world travelled , college educated and can speak 5 languages ?
Does my blunt affirmation that you are a hooker, prosititute or AKA paid whore hit a nerver with you ?
I'm sorry if my "reality" language is not preferable to how you see yourself and the reality of your job that you discuss with family and close friends.
I call a spade a spade.
I don't live in a fantasy world .
I am NOT in denial - I'm a John - I pay for sex!
My mother sister and friends all know I pay hookers to suck my dick and call me "daddy".
I have not the time or fucking care to hear a woman's mouth and opinions!
They are good for one thing and one thing only - to be moist and be a cum dumpster
In $$$$$ too big too ignore......
Helen? Is that you?....Are you back with us, transformed, and still invincible?
GuyBeingaTotalDickHead, you just go ahead and roar! :
But I do. And this tool even thought you were a hooker! So he's not only a complete douchebag, he's an ignorant ass-wipe. Now, I may be a prick (and I"m sure you'd agree), but at least I'm not a stupid prick. LMAO!
Whore. Bitch. Cum dumpster.
I would, however, know he was completely daft, delusional, and wildly insecure. And, probably blind.....lol...
You say you don't go down on providers because you don't know if she did x, y, and z before you got there, but let me clue you in...I have sex 'maybe' 3 times a month as a hooker. That is LESS sex and d(ck sucking than someone who has a boyfriend would do. I fked everyone in my high school for free, and unprotected, so your logic is seriously flawed. It's not the title that makes one a whore, it's the actions, and you will never know if your own mother or sister has done this. So, your cum dumpster sister might have just drank from you milk glass, ass wipe. Oh, and "cum dumpster" is my fkin word...get your own, or at least come up with something more original.
You're pissed that you have to pay for sex and OMG with whores loll ONLY guys like that are so hell bent on trying to justify what we are to them. Whassa matter...did an ex break your heart? Or, did some hooker turn you down for OTC time and this is a manifestation of your pain lol. Awww...now you have to slum it with the hookers who you can't possibly fathom are superior to you in so many ways. Of course you don't care if she is educated...that only makes you feel more crappy about yourself. You need a dumb ass and a willing hole, because you are a tiny, insecure man, and that's all you will ever be. Sucks to be you, I guess.
-- Modified on 10/30/2013 9:39:48 AM
¿Qué pasó? ¿Las prostitutas no pueden hablar mas que un idioma? Invertimos in nuestras profesiónes. En este profesión hay mas dinero. ¿Si un educación ayudamos, porque no?
God, it took for-EVER to get those damned accents in there on this Mac, haha.
Regarding well travelled. *sigh* why do you guys demand this, then complain when ladies advertise they have these things under their belt? Perhaps they're well traveled... because... men... are... paying them to ... travel. LOL. Just a thought there.
I know you're just being a dip-shit for fun, so that's all I have to say for now,
ta-ta!
Are you somehow in a world that you fantasize you are a "companion" that is world travelled , college educated and can speak 5 languages ?
Does my blunt affirmation that you are a hooker, prosititute or AKA paid whore hit a nerver with you ?
I'm sorry if my "reality" language is not preferable to how you see yourself and the reality of your job that you discuss with family and close friends.
I call a spade a spade.
I don't live in a fantasy world .
I am NOT in denial - I'm a John - I pay for sex!
My mother sister and friends all know I pay hookers to suck my dick and call me "daddy".
I have not the time or fucking care to hear a woman's mouth and opinions!
They are good for one thing and one thing only - to be moist and be a cum dumpster !
"I've fallen for my provider" hormones... me too... I fall for each gal (If she's any good at her job)... until the next one. That's why I rotate among a few Favs.