Had a discussion with a veteran, well-regarded  high-dollar provider today who wanted my opinion on how to handle a potential client today. She wondered should she see him or not? We talked about it and ultimately, she decided not to.

A couple of caveats: This is a long story, but not complicated. She gave me the ok to share the emails and all the details, names of course protected though since she thought maybe some of you might have some useful and valuable suggestions. One more note,  I looked, she has 90 TER reviews, and of those 75 are 7 and above for looks and appearance and the vast majority are 8s and 9s.

Let me lay out the scenario (names removed) and see what you all would have done? Direct quotes because she forwarded me the emails.


Guy contacts provider by email with subject heading “request for appointment”
The traveling provider arrived in his city Sunday afternoon.
He asks what time she has available Monday morning.
She replies “Are you interested in morning, afternoon or evening?
Probably later morning he replies.
The rest is taken directly from the emails:

He: “Where do I find your reviews? And how much for two hours, or three hours?”
She: “I have lots of reviews on TER, the gift for 2 hours is usually $800. 3 is $1150, she responds.”
He: “Your latest review is a 6!!!!!!” (his exclamation points)
She: “To be honest, I am not a member of TER, so I have not read it. The 2 before that are both 9 and 9. I believe and one of those is from the same month, why get hung up on one review?”
He: “Ur (sic) message is sounding like a bit of ‘attitude’? Is it? For $500.00 I certainly wouldn’t want to wind up with an unpleasant experience. Can u help me understand better! Many Thanx!”
She: “I’m not a member of TER so I don’t have access to the full review and haven’t read it. How is that having an attitude? I have like 5 pages of mostly good reviews so I don’t get what the big concern is. I have plenty of repeat business and that is what I pay attention to, not some silly review. If you choose not to see me based on the fact one person gave me a 6 well then that is your decision to make. I don’t feel as though I should have to defend myself.”
He: Your words “why get hung up on one word’ prompted me to ask whether or not you were leading to attitude. Was I wrong? Tell me, what do I get from you for $500 that I would not receive from another provider without an attitude and certainly as nice or nicer looking as you who charges only $300? If you’re that much better than the $300 person then certainly I would want to see you.. Are you? And if so, how?”

At this point, she’s thinking is he a cop? He wants her to discuss potentially illegal intimate details to a complete stranger in an email? Or  she thinks, is one of the kinds of guys that never intended to pay her rates to start with and just wanted to hassle her because her rates are higher than some others?

She decides she isn’t going to see him so it’s no longer worth responding.


So the question for the board is this? How could this have been handled better?  And what would you have done in this situation?

Curious for everyone’s responses and thought this was a worthwhile topic to post about.

Rick2

Go to my site and everything is there-

After that- there isnt anything else to say -

He doesnt sound like a cop -
he sounds like a tire kicker-
If it was a cop , he woulda made the appt and not danced around nonsense-

When you're busted, you're busted-

emails arent evidence of anything in court anyhow - I dont think...

She let this conversation go on WAY too long. When a provider sets her rates she should not feel the need to explain, rationalize, or convince anyone why she charges those rates for her time. If he didn't want to pay the rate there were plenty of more girls to choose from out there.

As for him being a cop.....if she is that much of a veteran she should have done her homework well enough to know if he was a cop or not.

-- Modified on 6/30/2008 10:17:27 PM

I would have said "please review my website" and ended it there.

Well, when he asked how much the donation was, and where her reviews are, I probably would have deleted his e-mail then. That information is readily available, and presumably so in her case as well, so if he didn't take the time to do research on his own, he isn't safe to see. Plus, chances are, he already has the information, and was just trying to start a fight, as evidenced by later e-mails. This guy never had any intention of seeing her. He yanked her chain, and she let him.

Tell your lady friend to sign up for TER (no cost to her), request limited VIP status as a provider (still no cost to her), and request access to the Provider's Only board (still no cost to her). Questions like this, and sharing information like this, are exactly what that board is for. All she needs is the TER logo on her website, if it isn't there already.

This is not an atypical story. He's using reviews to haggle. Best to tell a guy like this to enjoy his little Vienna sausage in private.

the second email. She should have stopped after the first review comment. Nobody needs to listen to that crap.

Sincerely, unless she needs the money real bad WHY meet with a guy she knows will not be enjoyable.

I get similar inquiries and, to me, it doesn't set a good mood for a memorable experience for both of us.

I do not waste my time going through all this mail exchange, sorry, is not my way.

Besides, my phone is always ringing and I have many other guys willing to visit me and not only give my deserved donation, but also gifts or generous tips.

Why she is worrying about this situation? I never sweat over these kind of guys, trying to guess if they are cops or assholes, because I really don't care to go any further with them.

I delete the mails, block their numbers on my cell and move on to...NEXT!

BDG

Question is paraphrased: How should this provider have handled this situation better?

Answer is: Move ON! No exceptions. He IS a tire kicker, but he's also looking for a discount as a result of a score of 6.

Good GAWD folks. This hobby's opinions are SO subjective. Who knows if the guy meant to hit 7 or 8 or even 9 and screwed up? Who knows what drugs the guy was on that day? Who knows if the provider simply didn't have a good day?

As we know, all of these things happen.

This kind of guy makes it difficult for those of us who don't haggle or question.

Had he done his research properly, AND wasn't a jerk, he may have seen her. FULL PRICE.

Many of my lovely friends have told me that the instant someone behaves like this, they are cyber-dust. DELETED IMMEDIATELY.

If I were a provider, I would have gone to the next email and had fun.

say it isn't so. lol

The lady made the right decision in not responding further.  The dude doesn't sound like LE...they would not argue over price, but would take the easiest route in setting up the meeting.  Rather, this dude sounds like a cheap a**-hole that's trying to hustle a lower rate.  If she said yes, bet the dude would try to haggle for more once in session...including forbidden services.  Yes, she made the right choice...

Once he started haggling, if I were here I would have deleted the email and ignored all future emails.

Book, or don't book. It's really that simple.