I ask why?
Why do some guys allow post session correspondence to influencing their writing a review?
Do you write reviews with post session emails in mind?
When you write a review is it solely about the session and conversations (professional at setting up appt etc) prior to the session, rather than post session?
Once, I had a guy tell me how much he could not wait to write a 10/10 review of me (high ratings are not unheard of in my case). He said "I love you" while fucking and clearing had the time of his life. After the session, he sent me an email stating he couldn't wait to write my review and relive our time together. Then, he emailed me informing me that his experience was more than he could ask for as he was sexually abused as a child and I was the first provider to ever make him feel comfortable embracing his sexuality. His email was about two pages long and way too deep and therapy seeking from a "john" I had only met once, so I deleted his email without replying. He never wrote the review about our 10/10 experience.
If you allow post session correspondence to influence your writing a review, then what are you looking for? Are you looking for therapy after the session? Are you looking for never ending (free of charge) email chatting with a provider?
If you do this, why?
Aliases welcome.
Aliases welcomed.
Honesty welcomed.
LADIES: After a session, do you feel pressure to have long drawn out conversations by email, IM, PM whatever proclaiming how much you enjoyed yourself just to get the review? Do you ever find that the one or two emails after the fact are not enough and that some guys who say they will write you a review try to go on and on with emailing each other about your encounter that happened a week ago with him or the weather, etc?
Is this common for u?
Do you feel your services spill out of the bedroom or scope of what you say you offer?
*I am not talking about developing relationships and cultivating regulars (as many of us successful providers do) so please save the "ads" about how you do that for another post. I am asking about those who abuse emails after the fact and whether some ladies feel pressure to return some emails in hopes of receiving a review.
How have you decided to respond to those who seek free chat after the fact? Do you ignore the emails and forgo the review?
Random thoughts
what kinda of inappropriate, especially in an arrangement considered no strings attached and you only met. I'm thinking he realized how forward he was and got too embarrassed to write the reviews.
MY post session correspondences with clients is what i consider short and sweet, there is no unnecessary chatter only admiration, and the hopes to meet again soon. I have a busy life and so do they.
But no this hasn't happened to me, if it did, i'd tell him I'm very busy with engagements and unless it's something useful i won't be responding, if he wants to talk to me about the weather- he can talk about it in my bed with his cock in my mouth. That
s the only time. I'm not here to dilly dally (if that's how you say it.)
that schmooze and cultivation are two entirely diff. concepts. I can tell the diff. I absolutely adore cultivation while detest schmooze.
Honestly, I am of the opinion that I have very little control over how I am reviewed. This does not make me feel defensive as I have worked as a writer in the past and have been on the other side of the reviewing process. Review systems are always subjective and no matter how good you are at something, you will eventually encounter some negative opinions if you stay around long enough. However, most readers have enough common sense to weigh up the total range of reviews (taking into account who wrote them) when they are trying to come to a decision. Therefore, I take a philosophical approach to the review system on TER.
The way I see it, if someone feels like reviewing me then they will do so. In my experience, the majority of gentlemen do not review. I suspect that decisions on whether or not to review are based on a wide variety of factors outside of my control, such as how much free time a gentleman has that week, how public or private he is about his participation in the hobby and how much he enjoys writing reviews. I doubt that engaging in lengthy emails with someone or offering special favors will make them more likely to post a review.
On a related note, I think it is unhealthy to become too obsessed with reviews. I know that they are helpful in generating business but the end of the day, they are just opinions. I have heard of providers who go crazy over reviews, taking anything under a 9 as a personal slight and attempting to manipulate the system when reviews are not to their liking. I suspect that their ego rather than their business sense is the underlying motivation. In any case, these tactics usually backfire as most clients are not fools. A reputation for manipulating reviews is more damaging than the occasional bad one.
The only factor I can control is my performance during the session. Therefore, I just try to bring my A-game every time and hope that the reviews will take care of themselves. If my clients choose not to write reviews, that is their decision. As long as they have enjoyed the session, I have done my job.
I have several clients that I rally "clicked" with. We exchange ocassional emails about our lives, the weather in our areas, fun things we have been doing and share photos of our pets.
Wow...
If in your shoes, I would probably delete as well.
I know in my case, at most I will email the provider thanking her for a great session etc. If she replies, fine. If she dont, that's good too. I don't "expect" a contact. I don't have long email chats with most of the clients I work with. I send my work, they thank me and pay me, and then that's. While we are talking apples and oranges here, the same concept kinda applies.
Sounds like he was trying to get more attention from you for free. IMHO.
It will be to let her know I enjoyed seeing her, and that another visit is likely. If I decide to write a review, this will have no influence.
You ask why I correspond with her post-meeting to let her know my appreciation? Because it's the right thing to do! Never forget, our lady friends are just that. Treat them right, and your next meeting with her will be met with enthusiasm! Treat them like sh*t, expect the same. It really isn't rocket science...
I saw a young ladie only one time. In the aftermath,while in the process of scheduling other appts. we became almost pen-pals. She vented.I vented.The info. that she shared was IMO immensley personal. I was slightly floored. She has since cancelled all of her tours/appts. and frozen me out completely. Since I've only seen her once, no harm-no foul really.
If you are either ashamed or embarrassed at what you have chosen to share with a client,then why do it. Rest assured all this young ladies personal moments will probably die with me,but I can't help feeling perplexed. If she needed an ear to bend(with a client),I am glad it was me. What if it were a wacko?
Individual human behavior is unanswerable and unpredictable so don't ask why.
You have to realize that writing a review and getting it approved "could" be a very large pain in the ass. It could be that he wrote it and it never got approved, he rewrote it and it didn't get approved and he gave up. All that has nothing to do with you.
I have not seen a consistent basis of review approval. Some are a couple sentences with no real information and some are very in depth about overall ambiance as well as actual descriptions. And I am sure both have been refused as well.
It is very easy to get frustrated with the system as it stands, and thus a particular review might never see the light of day.
b-
I'm dealing with that trying to get a review approved right now. Every time I fix one thing, they send it back wanting something else.
This is a young lady I know who recently went independent and really wanted to give her a review to get her started, but it is starting to become more trouble than it is worth.
But really, it's not necessary 
There is not usually post session correspondence after my sessions. I don't think it is necessary. I don't send them to my barber, my accountant, the 7-11 clerk, etc.
This is a business transaction that is done when I walk out the door.
It also has nothing to do with me posting a review, or not.
You were correct in deleting that dude's email. I would recommend staying away from him, and ignoring future emails. He sounds like he has a stalker mentality.
For me the hobby is all about NSA. I rarely see someone a second time, and I'm not looking for a pen pal.
so the lady knows how much I enjoyed our time together.
This activity is way more personal than when I see my accountant or barber (even the young hot gal who sometimes brushes her thighs or breasts against me while cutting my hair).
I usually send a brief Thank You post session if I had a good (or better time) & plan to repeat.
I usually do review which gives me a somewhat muted opportunity to relive the pleasure of her company. I am discrete.
Some ladies reply to a thank you & some do not. Frankly, a brief warm reply may make me more likely to repeat sooner rather than later, though it does not change my review.
The instance you describe is way too therapy seeking & a single reply would not have sufficed... he really needed a therapist! If you are not a qualified therapist, nor is he a patient, then you should not try to become one. You made the right call for this very needy gentleman.
skb
I agree. Although I have never encountered it, there is a fine line (for both sides) between welcomed/appropriate and unwelcomed/creepy.
While I have never sent a communication to my lady friends that was not "transactional" in nature, I have received emails, texts, and calls pre/post appointments. They are always some combination of sweet, sexy, and funny. And they are appreciated.
Of course, I know it's due to my looks, charm, and generosity. To be fair, I will allow the small possibility that it has more to do with customer relations and marketing. The male ego being what it is, I chose to believe the former.
"Why do some guys allow post session correspondence to influencing their writing a review?"
I have no idea. If I have the lady's email address, I will generally send a quick one or two line 'Thank you' message - that is assuming I did have an enjoyable time. I always get a simple response back. Sometimes, they beat me to it by sending me a message immediately after our time together. That's a nice touch.
But, the only way the post-session correspondence would influence a review would be if she was rude, or threatening in some way. Hasn't happened to me yet.
"Do you write reviews with post session emails in mind?"
Nope. See above. The review only involves our time together and perhaps a brief description of whether it was particularly easy or difficult to make the appointment.
"When you write a review is it solely about the session and conversations (professional at setting up appt etc) prior to the session, rather than post session?"
See above.
"If you allow post session correspondence to influence your writing a review, then what are you looking for? Are you looking for therapy after the session? Are you looking for never ending (free of charge) email chatting with a provider?"
Hell No! I only communicate with providers if I am setting up an appointment or briefly thanking them. I suppose if a favorite of mine really wanted to correspond, I would be open to simple and infrequent back-and-forth.
Finally, I have a question for you:
You ask basically the same question five times in your post. Does this happen to you often or is this an isolated case of a single clingy, needy client?
If it happens to you frequently, you may want to examine what you are doing during the appointments to get such a reaction. Are you too open about yourself and your life? Do you ask your clients many personal questions? Basically, are you creating an environment where you are the therapist while they lay on your couch?
I'll be curious to see if many other providers respond to your post with multiple horror stories of such annoying clients. I hope it is extremely rare.
Dear sweet lady, sometimes a session is just so damn good, that I really wish to demonstrate just how grateful I am. In those instances I will compose the review and send the thing to the lady it is written about. I am asking her to review and edit the writing simply because I want it to express her take on the session... ejoyable? did I miss or forget something, and most important, did I include something that she would wish not appear in a review.
I have received a lot of questions on my reviews, and for some, there just is NO more information than is in the review, but for some - there is more. but I just don't share everything for the simple reason - some of it is personal.
There are several providers that I have become friends with, but I would NEVER presume to just idly chat or e-mail with them, except an occasional note to ask how they doin... or what is up... one keeps me informed of her comings and goings, and it is appreciated....
but do I correspond with every provider? no. Do I write reviews, or have a session thinking "I'm gonna stalk this lady with e-mails and black mail her with my review?" no! I am joe average, gettin my sexual jollies with beautiful ladies who are willing to share their sexual nature with me for a short period of time, in return for some financial consideration.... that is it.
hope this helps, cause if I did schedule an appointment with you, based upon the vast majority of folks I have seen in the past, you would never hear from me again... until of course I hound on twitter.... ya know, the new electronic way to annoy peeps.
to be my therapist, nor do I ever intend to ask. I did, however, expeience the shoe being on the other foot. After seeing a young lady a couple of times, she apparently got too comfortable, and began sending me emails about her personal life, asking me for advise. At first, I saw no harm, and offered some simple suggestions, but it started to get waaaaay too personal. She was telling me things that were clearly none of my business. It took a few emails to get her to stop, but she finally did. Sometimes you just have to say things that you really don't want to, but there's no other way to deal with it, so I did.
Not unlike your "friend", she was a little spooky.
I've received some very nice thank you emails over the years. Only one of them has ever even mentioned a review and it was already in the approval process when I got her note. In fact, the nicest note I ever got was from one of my regs who isn't on TER and doesn't even want reviews.
I'm not sure how I would react if a gal started really lobbying me for a good review. I don't see a lot of new women at this point but it does seem like the pressure for good reviews has increased as TER has become more well known to hobbyists.
I hate the email hogs....our time isn't free.....I hope that guy reads this post.