Ran across this today and it reminded me of a time I slowly pulled the zipper down on one of these whilst DFKing with a hottie in a beach bar bathroom hallway about 1,000 years ago, ever since then Mr. Chubs wakes up whenever I see a girl in one of these..what turns your head on the beach?  And what do you providers prefer to wear?  Thought we might take a short break from the heavy stuff!

-- Modified on 9/6/2014 11:39:13 AM

Oh you meant beachwear.

I think they are more alluring than a tiny bikini...  

Anything that accentuates and doesn't hide the masterpiece that is the female body will turn my head. Admittedly, some women need to cover it up, and unfortunately not all of those women know it.

But the zipper thing trumps that for me!

I was peeking around on the internet to look at where I can get one of these one-piece suits with a plunging neckline (the zipper is a nice touch) as I exclusively wear bikinis in the summer or at the hut tub on the slopes in the winter (nothing is better than apres-ski beers or champagne -- the day's selection depends on the company -- in the tubbie!!). I found one and just ordered, but I was wondering how guys feel about suits like this?  

makes me turn my head and yack.  

I think its very distracting from the gorgeous lady in it!!...me eye is looking at the suit....not the lady....that's not right!!

And in the back of my mind is:
How freaky are those tanlines going to look?
How do you design a pattern like that?  Aren't swimsuits supposed to be simple and flattering, what happened here?
If you do get close, how do you touch her without getting tangled in the webbing?
If you try to get the suit off, will the webbing grab earrings, hair, furniture etc?
Wait, what did she look like again?  Got distracted by the suit itself.

Ha! I didn't even think of the tan lines!!! I'd be better off wearing deer netting -- at least that would be even!!!