A man was at the country club for his weekly round of golf. He began his round with an eagle on the first hole and a birdie on the second. On the third hole he had just scored his first ever hole-in-one when his cell phone rang.
It was a doctor notifying him that his wife had just been in a terrible accident and was in critical condition in the ICU. The man told the doctor to inform his wife where he was and that he'd be there as soon as possible. As he hung up he realized he was leaving what was shaping up to be his best ever round of golf. He decided to get in a couple more holes before heading to the hospital.
He ended up playing all eighteen, finishing his round, shooting a personal best 61, shattering the club record by five strokes and beating his previous best game by more than 10. He was jubilant. Then he remembered his wife. Feeling guilty, he raced to the hospital. He saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about his wife's condition.
The doctor glared at him and shouted, 'You went ahead and finished your round of golf didn't you! I hope you're proud of yourself! While you were out enjoying yourself at the country club, your wife has been suffering in the ICU! It's just as well you went ahead and finished that round because it will likely be your last! She will require 'round the clock care and unless you can afford three shifts of nurses for the rest of her life, you'll be her care giver!'
The man was feeling so distraught he broke down and sobbed. The doctor snickered and said, 'Just messing with you. She's dead. What'd you shoot?
are out playing golf one morning. The Bishop gets up and drives his ball straight down the fairway. It hooks around the trees, and lands 20 feet from the green. Unbelievable shot! The Pope whacks his ball. It goes straight over the trees, over the Bishop's ball, lands on the green, and rolls 15 feet from the cup. The Lord gets up, slices his ball way off to the right, hits a tree, bounces back, lands in a water hazzard, fish comes along, gobbles up the ball, fisherman catches the fish, pelican swoops down, eats the fish, flies over the green, shits and the ball drops right in the cup. The Bishop turns to the Lord and says, "You gonna play golf, or you gonna fuck around"?
waiting for her husband to get home after a round of golf. He's several hours late by the time he drags himself home. The wife asks, "What happened? Why are you so late?" The husband replies, "It was a horrible day and a horrible round of golf. You remember Harry?" She nods yes. "Well he dropped dead of a heart attack on the 3rd hole!" She exclaims, "That is horrible! I'm so sorry. What did you do?" He replies, "That's why the round was so long. For the rest of the day, it was, hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry!"
This one had me shouting out with laughter. good one really good one. I will try to remember it. LOL to funny thanks for the laugh still laughing madeline
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