"What are your rates again?""

 No Way..If I asked that, I would leave on my own.
On the other side of the coin if a provider told me what her rates are "after" I arrived, I would leave.

Don't think you were wrong at all.  If he doesn't remember what you look like of your rates he's either on something, has issues, or is trolling for you to say something.  Whichever, you did the right thing.

I would leave without a fuss. But to clarify...

I would never be so stupid as to ask dumb questions like that knowing that it would likely trigger stress in the lady. And since you are a true Ebony Goddess, I would clearly not miss my opportunity the check out all the junk in the trunk. rofl

I would leave without a fuss. However in my opinion I would not do those things and therefore would not be put in that position. But if a provider felt uncomfortable and said so, I would leave. Just like I would like that option if the feelings were reversed.

You did the right thing and listened to your gut (always!) From the sound of things he might have been intoxicated.

being unreasonable to ask him to leave. He seemed to be tremendously confused, and there can be all sorts of scary reasons for that. Or, he was feeling ambivalent about spending time with you, which is again confusing if your ad and/or website give an accurate description of you.

Those seem like pretty innocent questions and

given that you had screened him did not justify showing him the door.

     Presumably something more happened but just bc a guy could not remember your rates, said you looked different from your pictures, and could not remember where he saw your ad – that is all harmless stuff. Of course, no one wants to proceed to the next level if you felt really uncomfortable but the problem is the guy could have spent an hour driving to see you, could have taken off time from work, probably dropped $20 for the parking etc.

       So I think I would side with the client here – the degree of disconnect you identify did not justify asking him to leave. I would have felt offended and would have viewed the treatment as unprofessional.

not know what the agreed upon rates are "before" they are in the room together?  

That is the kind of question and answer that gets people in trouble.

You should have shown him the door IMMEDIATELY after that question.  

It appears that he did not want to push through with the session. Either that .. or he could have been high .. on crack.  Can't remember the rates? the pics? Sounds fishy.

So that was the right thing to do.

or emailing and asking all the wrong questions and making all the wrong statements about services they want in emails.
I send them to my website and my  reviews and they still don't get it and I just at this point, simply end up telling them I am NOT available.
I am heading in the direction of not wanting to see any new ppl if this keeps up. I only want drama free problem free easy clients who in the first email know how to make contact and then simply supply thier references without Begging for them and not having to pull teeth.
I AM sick of dragging info out of ppl.
I Know noone comes here knowing how to do all this but some are just dumb as rocks to begin with, make me nervous with the questions make very uncomfortable statements, it seems every now and then theres  an overflow of dumbasses who seems to be floating around here and I am just at the point of passing on seeing any of them.

Ok thats my rant anyway.

I think you did the right think going with your gut. Sounds like LE or maybe something worst. if a provider asked me to leave I see no point in disputing her request.

He and I e-mailed each other several time and booked almost 4 days in advance. My rates were made clear on my site and every post/ad where he might have seen me.

When he asked about my rates - which I never changed - it was to say "I want to make sure I have enough." That and the "I thought you were darker skinned and about 5'10"" were all the red flags I needed.

Even if he was cool and didn't mean anything by it, I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE. Therefore I would not have provided him with a good time anyway.

As for parking - it was free, and he only traveled about 15 minutes to see me.

One thing, If a gentleman produces and envelope I most likely check it discreetly. So if it is short, he will know. If I do not say anything - he can stay mute on the subject.


Kisses,
Vanica

-- Modified on 8/22/2010 10:44:23 PM

Sounds like he was high

I mean, how could a guy space having a date with you?!

Never feel bad about following your instincts. Nothing there to be sorry about



HalfHour

the rates question is particularly disturbing and suggests a problem.

as for leaving without a fuss, yes. of course i am assuming with envelope. without might increase the risk of a fuss.

i don't know what it is you expect to learn, though, by asking if the readers here would leave without fussing. i'm sure that except for a few alias wise guys, all you'll hear is a chorus of yesses. likely all will be true too.

i thik that like this situation in which you trusted your instincts, the question "will he fuss? and how much?" is best answered case by case and in the moment. i don't think that an answer from the board is going to be very useful in any particular instance.

using an "average" response to predict an "individual" behavior will make mistakes.

These questions are not innocent.I would immediately be uncomfortable just my personal opinion.As soon as I heard what are your rates?where do you advertise I forgot?and the rest of the questions I would be hightailing it out of there or in your case asking him to leave.Gentleman that hobby and have been doing this for awhile or years know not to ask any of those questions.Why?Because they have already all of the info that this gentleman asked provided by ads and/or website.If a gentleman contacts you for an appointment he already knows what you like per your pictures that's what probably captured his attention in the first place.All ladies have more than a few pics so the gentleman can get an idea of how she looks at different angles so there is no reason to get to the appointment and start making comments "I thought you were darker and taller."After the ladies pics has his attention he has to figure out can I afford to see her?No use in wasting anyone's time if she is out of my range so in this guy's case sounds like someone trying to play games or just a real weirdo.I'm scratching my head trying to figure out why a gentleman would ask all of those questions and expect the lady to still be comfortable enough to go along with the appointment.

You height could be chit chat...   skin tone could be photo setting...  Where was the ad could be bad memory as I research every available source.   But when the discussion of money comes up, it's a RED FLAG!  Either party has the right to end the proceedings at ANY TIME.  Presumeably at this early point, it would be with his donation.   Later on, a partial refund would facilitate the exit.  
To answer the Q.  I hope that I am a gentleman & would not be asked to leave.  I have ended civie dates, when clearly we were not on the same page.   I would strive to make a stressfree gentleman's exit.
skb

he would be unhappy (if he was a real client or LE - LOL), but you did the right thing. I would be unhappy if asked to leave, but I would go without question and not contact the provider again.

Well, if I liked the person, given the few minutes spent together, I'd be a little sad.. perhap ask why and what could I do better, .. but if I felt I just needed to go.. I'd leave...  No big deal.