I think it depends on whether you want to keep seeing her. Even a whole day of social time for $1000 is a relatively painless hit when you paid $1500 for an hour of sex. The way you make next time a better deal for you is to tap her again before you go to dinner, and then don't let her get as drunk before going back to the room. For me, at my age, three pops in a whole day would be pushing it, but I haven't tried lately when its spread out over 12 hours. When I spend Saturday nights overnight with my hooker girlfriend, I get two pops, and then after EIGHT hours of sleep, I can manage a third in the morning. (You;re wondering why I'm on TER tonight instead of fucking her . . . . she's on her period. I will go for breakfast and a blow job in the morning - lol). But the point is, even if she gets naked with you in anticipation of a third go-around, fucks you and sucks you, but the third pop just isn't coming, I think you still had a good day for the extra $1000.
If you're ambivalent about seeing her again, then I like the idea of just telling her she doesn't have to pay you back any money, but YOU WILL TAKE IT OUT IN TRADE ON THE NEXT MEETING, which as you say, means you pay $500 and forgive the debt. She leaves town debt-free, and then you REALLY got your money's worth when you average the two dates together. However, if you opt for this approach, she may only give you the hour of sex and not the rest of the day. You also have to consider that this may have been a one-time opportunity because she had not booked another customer after you, and rather than sit in the room, she chose to spend it socially with you. As GaG will probably agree, these kinds of scenarios often happen on the fly and cannot be counted on to be a regular thing. This may be a one-off that never comes around again with this porn star.
What would you do and this did happen to me. Last year around this time I saw a pornstar who was in town. Made the connection and we hooked up. The deal was $1500 for the hour. I went to her in call location. Beautiful hotel and did the deal. After an hour, I was like “I’m going to get going” and her response was “why you have some place to go it’s ok just stay and hang out I’ve got nothing going on”. So I did. She opened up her mini bar and it’s was around 11-12:00 in the afternoon. I like morning sex too. So I had no place to go so sure let’s do some day drinking. We had a drink then small talk turned into great conversations. She then asked if I was hungry and you want to get something to eat. “Sure!” Was my reply. So we went to this local steakhouse and sat at the bar and had lunch. The shots started and it was go time. This is now probably 4pm the buzz is going and she says let’s do something fun and she suggested ping pong. Yes ping pong. So there’s this place downtown called SPIN that’s a ping pong bar. So now we’re spending the day together and we’re really clicking in the “friends” way. I tell her I have to go take my dog out and she was like “I’ll come with you” and she did. We laughing rolling around having a great time. We walk the dog and now it’s dinner time she goes back to the hotel changes as I do and we meet back up for dinner. I’m thinking ok this fun... Enjoy it. We have dinner and martinis and we go back to her room where we have more drinks out of her mini bar because it was restocked while we were gone. Now, she wants party favors. I’m like “fuck, here we go.” I call up a guy I know that knows a guy and now we’re out chasing the snowman around town. Now little head is drunk. Getting horny. I’m feeling I’ve put some time and effort in to this all day and night. I’m wondering now is there going to be a pay off (meaning of course sex). It’s now 1:00am there’s nothing but drunken high babble and shes starting to get sloppy. I finally give in and I put her to bed and left like a gentleman. Next morning I wake up with a text saying let’s grab breakfast. I meet her for breakfast and here it comes. She asks, “I’m leaving later on today can I borrow $1000 because I have to pay my kids tuition and it’s due right now but I don’t have time to deposit the money I’ve made this week”. She must have thought she had a third eye the way I looked at her. She said “she would pay me back the following week via cash app”. So with hesitation I did do it. All I could think about was all the time I spent with her the night before and day which was her suggestion and it was all on my dime which the whole day and night with everything was about another $1000 PLUS.
So now she’s in town and we did talk throughout the year back-and-forth never brought up the money. We chatted yesterday to possibly connect while she’s here and she leaves Monday. So I know whats gonna happen. It’s gonna be written up as a loss. If we connect do I use it as a deposit and I owe her just $500. Do I bring it up??? Do I just pay the full amount again? Do I passively aggressively remind her but let her know it’s ok the loan is forgiven see what kinda response. I feel all these are tacky but it’s the principle. I know I’m not gonna bring it up unless she does. But what would you do? Once again that day of activity was never on the clock nor was it ever assumed that it was ever on the clock. I’m not broke cheap or in need but once again it’s the principle.
Your thoughts.
Allow the verbal beating begin lol...
Snake 🐍
-- Modified on 1/30/2021 7:33:55 PM
Seems like she gave some OTC time and thought maybe that's worth 1k which is quite cheap. A full day with a SP not to mention pornstar would cost at least 3-5k even if it's just social time.
I would say maybe forget about it unless u really need the $. She may get offended If u expect a payback and future session may not be good.
You had a pretty good time to me despite the money issue. Can’t say if she had planned to ask for money all along since she, obviously, didn’t work anymore that day and wanted to recoup any possible losses if she could. I’ve never been in any sort of situation like that, so I can’t offer any sound advice. But, hopefully, the memories from having a fairly fun day with her takes the sting out of the predicament at least a little. Good luck, Snake.
but maybe with the benefit of hindsight she justifies it as the cost of letting you spend the better part of a day with a "Porn Star." Hell, she might think you got off cheap and that you owe HER money.
You shouldn't see her anymore if the principle of the "loan" bothers you. If you do see her while she's in town, she may do the same thing again and then what will you do if she hits you up for another "loan?"
If you make up your mind not to see her, wait until she contacts you asking if you're going to see her or why you didn't see her when she was in town. At that point, you can bring up the $1000 and see what she says.
It's happened to me before and I just shake my head at their shortsightedness. They're losing a lot more in income from lost future visits than a mere $1000.
But what’s kicks my ass is for a total of $3G I could have gotten a Rockstar local and spent the day and have sex more than once...
20/20 hindsight. Right?!?!
No biggie and I’m not going to take it any further but it’s just hearing how one might have dialed with it.
I’m gonna say one thing FUCK her I'm watching all her free porn until I feel I got my $2000 back. $1000 from the day parting and a $1000 from the “loan” lol
Once you have their money, you never give it back.
that you never loan providers money (perhaps in keeping with Fisher's post) -- it's either a gift or a loss?
Water under the bridge with regard to the choice. As some have said, not too big an expense for getting to spend time with some star but only you can say if that was worth it or not. You also maybe need to decide if you're not setting the expectation that another similar outcome is not forthcoming. Would you do it again if she presented the question?
I think if you have not thought about that then maybe figure that out and then you'll have a better idea of next steps -- drop her, see her but decline any OTC (or be prepared to say, sorry honey no spare cash to loan) or if you want to play the same game again. At least that would be my approach.
If so, ask for it. You risk burning bridges, but it is what it is.
Only you can evaluate whether the principle is worth it. Yes, you shouldn't have given her the $ since even for otc nonsex stuff you spent 1g out of your own pocket. But thats past the point.
You aren't likely to see that $. So the question is do you want to show adherence to principle and potentially burn bridges or just let it go?
Personally if I felt hustled or misled, I'd demand my money back and yes, potentially burn bridges. Principles are important to me. But only you can answer that question for yourself.
Well, its not really calling it out, but basically letting her know you aint cool with it.
As is, I'm sure she will consider you for another loan.
Again, it seems you understand that the money is 99% gone and if you the voice your concern she'll perhaps shrug and maybe cross you off her 'loaner list'.
So then what is the question ? Lol.
I think it depends on whether you want to keep seeing her. Even a whole day of social time for $1000 is a relatively painless hit when you paid $1500 for an hour of sex. The way you make next time a better deal for you is to tap her again before you go to dinner, and then don't let her get as drunk before going back to the room. For me, at my age, three pops in a whole day would be pushing it, but I haven't tried lately when its spread out over 12 hours. When I spend Saturday nights overnight with my hooker girlfriend, I get two pops, and then after EIGHT hours of sleep, I can manage a third in the morning. (You;re wondering why I'm on TER tonight instead of fucking her . . . . she's on her period. I will go for breakfast and a blow job in the morning - lol). But the point is, even if she gets naked with you in anticipation of a third go-around, fucks you and sucks you, but the third pop just isn't coming, I think you still had a good day for the extra $1000.
If you're ambivalent about seeing her again, then I like the idea of just telling her she doesn't have to pay you back any money, but YOU WILL TAKE IT OUT IN TRADE ON THE NEXT MEETING, which as you say, means you pay $500 and forgive the debt. She leaves town debt-free, and then you REALLY got your money's worth when you average the two dates together. However, if you opt for this approach, she may only give you the hour of sex and not the rest of the day.
You also have to consider that this may have been a one-time opportunity because she had not booked another customer after you, and rather than sit in the room, she chose to spend it socially with you. As GaG will probably agree, these kinds of scenarios often happen on the fly and cannot be counted on to be a regular thing. This may be a one-off that never comes around again with this porn star.
I’ve been in a similar situation...if you were to continue, you would be gambling that your initial investment will multiply into more pops at a lower rate/pop. In other words, that your sunk costs will pay off later.
You can be down a lot before the payoff, sort of like shorting stocks... It manifests as the outright “loan”/gift for some “emergency” or must have item (in my case a nice SLR camera back in the day) , an “emergency” plane ticket to get home, whatever.
IMO, one should not overvalue the social time initially even if she is a famous PS. It should be about the $/pop metric. However, if you actually come to like the girl enough, after a period of time—and this is a BIG IF not necessarily worth playing the game, only then would the social time be $ valuable to me.
Time to start editing my own post when I’ve been hanging out with GaGa’s bartender Jose C
Snake 🐍
-- Modified on 1/31/2021 12:11:28 AM
Now you’re talking! Inquiring minds want to know. 😎
friends and family because you can just kiss it goodbye or something like that. And now add hookers to the list.
The time to have mentioned it was immediately after the following week when she said she would pay you back.
It's been a year with no mention of it. The money is gone. 2000 for an entire day with a hooker, even being all social time at that, is really cheap and you spent it with a porn star. Mentioning it now or trying to treat it as a deposit would most likely be a major turn off to her.
Live and learn. I wouldn’t loan her anymore money unless you're ok with the outcome being the same.
I believe someone once said that you're always "on the clock" with a hooker unless she specifically tells you that you're not. Never assume anything. Assumptions always gets one in trouble.
Actually, that applies to ANYONE. If you need or expect the money back, get it in writing, notarized, preferably on a contract drawn up by an attorney. Otherwise, either say no or write it off as a gift.
Hookers and blow. Whatcha gonna do?! At least you didn't catch fire like Richard Pryor...
You should have, at the least, got a goodnight bbbjtcimws.
SMH
-- Modified on 1/31/2021 2:07:33 AM
My friend, after reading your great story, i got involved with a provider, with a kid , for about 3 yrs. My story is worse, because i got hooked into credit care co -sign issues. 1500$ an hr is a steep fee, but after the fun you had ? the xtra 1000$ is like stealing. If she is a mature , understanding woman? I would in a soft, quiet manner mention the loan. Ask her what is the most comfortable option for re-pay and see what transpires. If she reacts aggressively then forget it. Or she may do the "credit angle"? For 2500$ for at least 24hrs!! You da' Man#
I haven't been in this situation, but I suggest this approach...
If you definitely want her to see you again: Next time you talk to her, inquire politely whether she was able to get the tuition issue all worked out with her son (e.g. "By the way, did you ever get all of that tuition stuff worked out with your son?"). This may prompt her memory. If she doesn't at that point offer to compensate you (pay back or trade), say to her "The next time we're together, if you need more money, feel free to ask me if I want to stay on longer or spend the day socially. Then we can help one another." Consider that the money is gone, but it sounds like you had a good time (mostly).
If you don't care if she sees you again: Next time you talk to her, simply come out and tell her, "You know, that last time we were together I had a really good time. But, if you needed money, you could have told me up front. I probably would have been happy to extend our time. Would you be agreeable to integrating the money that I lent you into another visit?" It may piss her off, but you make your point, but don't sound like a prick confronting her.
One guys opinion
YOU GOT HUSTLED
chalk it up to the game bro
but it's what I would call "uncollectable debt" lol
I am sure in her own mind she believes she "earned it" but I am sure the OP will disagree with that assessment. Oh well, it happens even to the best of us. I guess he can chalk it up to a thousand dollar "tip" unless of course he ends up seeing her again and convinces her to somehow "make it up to him"
Personally I have had this kind of thing happen to me a few times over the years where a provider that I HAVE had sex with asks for a "favor" I have a rule of thumb that the MOST I will loan/give to a hooker is an amount equal to or less than ONE session with her. This gives you "some" chance of getting some kind of return on your money, otherwise you end up out the money AND out the girl as well as she is very unlikely to see you again if she thinks you will want to collect on a debt that she really never had any intention of paying back. The OP is in that range where she can make it up to him on a single visit and still walk away with more money and a return customer, so he has at least a slim chance here. Hey slim is better than none, right? lol
of whether she thinks she owes it, the likely outcome of mentioning collecting is her ghosting you.
I’m looking at it as a $2000+ loss. Meaning the $1000 “help” for the tuition cost PLUS $1000+ that was spent throughout the day and night feeding her everything under the sun (lunch, drinks, more drinks, ping pong bar, more drinks, dinner, party favors, etc.). The lunch and dinner ALONE averaged approximately $350 each (with drinks, shots, sake and oh, food. We didn’t go to Taco Bell. We went to a steakhouse and a swank sushi bar). I’m not adding in the $1500/hr playtime donation that we did have.
Once again, I’m ok with the outcome and I hope my post didn’t come out as a sad sack or a woo’s me. This isn’t a bitching thread (or at least that wasn’t my intention). I ate it. I’m a big boy and she didn’t force it outta me. And really I have no regrets, but the post on this board “falling for a provider” made this memory spark. Great answers out there and as explained in my OP she’s back in town and she has reached out and I just wanted to know what the thoughts out there are and what YOU would do.
Me, I’m over it. I had fun with her. I rarely see a provider more than once. Like any other providers out there. There’s a reason she’s reaching out and that’s because her time isn’t booked. She’s obviously not busy and If she WAS busy she wouldn’t be reaching out. I’m guessing she might have played this before and everyone in this wonderful city, called Metropolis is now ghosting her. So my outcome is chalk it up to a loss and IT IS an “uncollectible debt” and move on.
Just sayin’
Snake 🐍
-- Modified on 1/31/2021 2:02:26 PM
Anything you decided to spend off the clock she does not owe you. The more you think about it, the more you can justify adding on things like OTC expenses as a "loss". If you are really over it, who are you thinking about calling her out on the PS Board?
Technically she's owes you for the loan. Not sure making a stink about it will get her to pay you back in services. You get more with honey than well, you know. She might make it up to you. if you approach her sweetly. I agree she must not have been busy the day/night your saw her.
Just my opinion on your situation...
Steph XO
I agree. If it was me and I wasn’t worried about the cash and I didn’t care whether I saw her again then I would call her and politely remind her of the event. If she acknowledges and offers a credit towards P4P that’s awesome. If she says no or feigns forgetfulness, then move on and say thanks and don’t book a session. If she gets mad and ghosts/blocks you, nothing lost since you don’t care if you see her again. IMO it’s worth a phone call. Just my $0.02. Cheers!
OTC date expenses with a provider that I do with a civvie girl. If they are expenses I would have incurred with a civvie girl, then they are just part of cost of dating. It makes no difference that the lady is a provider. When I invite providers out or on vacations, I pay for everything just like I would if it was a girl I met at work or the grocery store.
...the arena you are in.
First, I disagree with anyone who suggests you got your money's worth by getting extra time with her, even without extra sex. Yes, if you had proposed an all-day date, or she had offered an all-day date with a $1,000 add on payment, this would be the end of the story.
But she offered to hang with you off the clock. You decided to pay for expenses along the way. I would have, and have done the same with some of the Porn Stars I have seen. It's a nice thing to do. But she didn't start by saying "If you can pay me another $1,000 and cover expenses, I'd love to spend the day with you." So no - the $1,000 is not "fair payment" for her time. I don't think conflating spending time with her and loaning her money is a valid argument.
Next, you should know that you never really loan money to anyone in a personal relationship, regardless of the so-celled "terms" you discuss at the time. If your friend, relative, etc. actually does pay you back, it's found money. Expecting a personal loan to be paid back will almost always result in a lost friendship or enmity with a relative. When you choose to give her money, you KNEW it was likely she would never pay it back to you. If you could not afford to lose that cash, you would have politely declined her request.
So no, don't even mention it. Just meet and enjoy the fun at the expected rate. You will enjoy the experience as much as she will and IF she tries to "borrow" more money after that, make a better-informed decision.
Life is good
The Cat
I have never spent the entire day with a brand new client OTK. You obviously trusted her enough to loan her $1k. I would not have gave her any money based on what occurred. Getting drunk all day with a new friend, and not running to the bank once during your day of binge drinking. If I paid tuition for my children it would be my priority over spending my day with you for free drinks, food & ping pong. Porn star who loves to get fucked up, and evades her Mom responsibilities, and ignores paying you back 1 year later...
Sounds, like trouble to me & you can go for another round, but don't expect to get your money back, or credit. I would not want to see her again, but that's just me. No drama Mama here. lol Smile 4 me!
This way she has time to think it over before responding.
Something like “instead of you paying me back the 1000, would we be able to see each other again?”
If she says no just move on. After you blast her on the porn star board of course.
And you pay a multiple.
Lil lady wanted some surgery, soooooo, I paid for that $7K, with just the promise to make me happy in the future for that amount--AND SHE DID, well $6K, or so;P~~~ The look in those blue eyes as she dined on some fat sausage and warm gravy, over and over, has burned a memory in the recesses of my memory, never to be forgotten;P~~~ I helped her, she returned the favor many times over
) Guess she was one in a million, now gone on with her life. If you got the money to play/dance with these ladies, just shrug it off and don't let it eat at your mind! AND, for Heaven's sake, don't fall in love with these lovely ladies, they(most) don't want you to do that, anyhoo! PS, I don't do that anymore--LOL Good luck with getting your mind straight on what YOU need to do going forward)
Maybe write off as donation to non-profit if you are inclined to do so.
I paid in advance because I had already spent what I thought was enough time with them. One honored it, the other didn't.
The one that didn't I didn't see it coming, but the other one was supposedly known to do that but didn't.
I wouldn't do it again. I'm too fucking old to fuck around like that and too mean to let them get away with it if I was that fucking stupid again...