I was in a personal relationship with a provider for over a year.  I gave her $9,000 a month so she wouldn't have to work.  I found out that she was still seeing certain clients and she never gave up her massage office.  I ended our relationship when I found out. To the providers out there - Is there an attraction to the business that is worth throwing away over $100,000 a year and never having to work again?  I know that she didn't make more by working.  Of course, it could have been that she just didn't like me.

and you think you can buy exclusivity?

If that was her job, the thing that gave her self worth then yes that's difficult to do. I can tell you that I couldn't be paid enough to be a stay at home mom. It's what some people want but if it's not what you want it's impossible to do.  

I'm not going to say 9k isn't more than your average American makes on a monthly basis, but it's the equivalent of holding a full time job at $51/hour. ($108,000).  

No thank you!!! Why be a kept woman when you can savior the many diff cock selection out there...    

Unless she had a major emotional connection to you, she can't really be paid any amount of money to be exclusive.  (V. Stiviano).  

First of all, as a previous poster stated, exclusivity is hard to buy although it should of been something that both of you must of discuss at the beginning of this arrangement.  

It's hard to see the entire picture sometimes.  

Really? You cannot expect a girl to bow down to your every demand for a price. Why don't you just get married instead, it's basically the same thing! Oh wait, you want to get rid of them with no recourse if they don't act the way YOU want them to. But then again, if you possess masochistic qualities, that's a suitable situation for you. You view everything in life as a service and nothing is of real pleasure to you except being the one in control.

includes the subtext "as long as I want to have sex with you and not a millisecond longer...".  That's not a personal relationship - that's a p*ssy rental agreement.  If there was a ring involved or something like it - I could understand your angst.  I am not really surprised that she wanted to moonlight to maintain her own means of support against the day you decided you liked redheads better than blondes or tiny spinners vs. Big *ssed, Big Boobed blondes or whatever.  

If she were honestly going to leave, she'd have asked for a lump sum.
Better yet, you might've offered it.  
If you think about all the time and effort that goes into building this business with people you've already met and trust, the option of starting over isn't pretty.
Severance pay is a must.

I would however say that an SD relationship wouldn't guarantee exclusivity,  but there are many relationships/ arrangements that are indeed exclusive.  

Because it makes the most sense. The minute he was done, so is she

Thank you all or at least most of you for your constructive comments.  Some very good points.  The personal relationship didn't start out that way as we have known each other for over four years and it evolved into my providing support for her the past twelve plus months.   She first brought up that she didn't feel comfortable working anymore so it went from there.  

You are chimp and moron assuming your story is true. You have more money that sense and the old adage “money is separated from fool faster than water through one’s closed hand” is very true in your case.

it is called Free Will..she can she who she wants..when she wants to and where she wants to.

My train of thought, would go something like this. I think, I could respect a regular client who was buying my time. I don't believe I could fully respect a SD, or a client who wanted LT4P relationship. With out trying to sound to judgmental, SD and LT4PR sound pathetic.  

You make me laugh out loud a lot!!!  

If there are no genuine feelings involved OR the lady really wants to quit providing, no amount of money in the world is going to guarantee exclusivity.

AND that's the way it should be. Let's face it, in Southern California where it appears that the OP lives $100 K is hardly "real" money, a $500 hr lady could see just one client every other day and make a hundred grand a year, all the while keeping her independence and not being dependent on a single man who could dump her at any moment.

what if sex doesn't sell?    

Currently in a LT4PR, if he thinks it's fair. Going by what the OP said, I'm going go with un-fair.

Why did she (the provider) leave?

You sound like a nice person so if would help if you kinds outlined what was going on arrangement wise.

xoxo,

Steph

But I'm glad you got the point.  It's sounds like your heart was in the right place.

You're the DRUNKEN ASIAN....  I would be too if there were 12 mouths to support... Pun intended!!!

Dear Courtney:
What did she need to function? Also was she open and honest with her economic requirements before she took the money as a stipulation? Those would be critical questions to ask during the course of the thread.

and didn't get that.

Steph

Your relationship with her was a rental agreement , not a personal relationship .
 
 You can never buy genuine love or total commitment no matter how much money you have .  
 Thousands and thousands of men and women have cheated when millions were on the line .
 Lust , love , or simple boredom trumps money every time .  
  The wife most likely to cheat married for money.  

The one thing you give up in arrangements like this is autonomy. Personally I would miss that a lot. That's why I never have and never would be up for an exclusive arrangement.  

There would be a "sit down" and everything would be iron out to remove any ambiguity and confusion.  

Dear D...

and every one of them regretted it.

It seems like the guys that want to pay someone to be their "girl friend" on a long term basis usually seem to not really want a GF, they want to "own" the woman. Gilded cage is the first thing that comes to my mind.

That whole on call, drop everything and run thing would not fly for me. I would have hours like any other job I went to. That's my whole point about sitting down and really working things out.  

My recommendation for anyone seeking it or offering it, is that it should always be 'defined in detail' prior to anything else in moving forward for both parties involved. It cannot work any other way. There also has to be that lil word called 'trust' to be displayed by both individuals in clearly discussing those details. Without it, as in any other relationship, it will not work on any level.  

on a weekly basis so it's difficult to figure out. He seems to have been good hearted, so I'm thinking didn't want the beck and call thing but who knows. His OP and follow up don't really address or outline what was going on in this respect.

...answered as though the contract required her to be a "stay at home mom."
Maybe that's how they see all SD relationships. In fact, SD relationships do not require the girl to be with the guy 24/7. It requires her to not wrap her pussy around another client without a cover...she can do other things... Doi.  

and he says he kicked her to the curb for "cheating" on him, so I think he has told us plenty.

His words "she never would have had to work again in her life" were the most telling IMO. He wanted her forever, she apparently didn't feel the same. Perhaps she doesn't look at it as losing $100K a year? Maybe she looks at is at the price for her freedom? Or maybe all he needed to do was not be so fucking cheap and given her an even ten grand a month instead of nine? lol

hey all,

Guess even a hooker who isn't a finance expert (by a long shot) knows it's not all that much if you think about it.

Remember, issues existed before there were issues.

I don't see him doing this out of some altruistic motivation. He wanted an exclusive relationship and he deluded himself into thinking that he had bought one. That's why he is all butt hurt that she is "cheating" on him, and has now cut her off.

He is exhibiting all the signs of a guy who has "fallen for a hooker and can't get up" Asking, begging, insisting on monogamy from someone because of a purely paid arrangement is just asking to be burned. Women, just like men are going to be faithful for one of two reasons, either they are in love, or they just have no desire to fuck anyone else. Being paid to be monogamous is simply unrealistic.

You know, of all the explanations I've given as to why I don't do well in SD/SB situations, your quote, "Women, just like men are going to be faithful for one of two reasons, either they are in love, or they just have no desire to fuck anyone else."

If it's true, it's a very big brady bunch.

which turns out to be nightmare in the long run and isn't it the primary reason for P4P?

they want it all, the more the merrier of every shape and size and that works for them.  

there is the issue of availability. Women, even ugly ones can get all the strange dick that they want. Guys, especially socially awkward guys in small towns have little temptation to fight. lol

I have to admit, I have a very tough time with temptation. I rarely find myself in monogamous relationships and I don't cheat when in one, but I have broken off many a relationship because I knew I had a wandering eye, and that wherever my eye goes my dick is sure to follow. lol