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JustTryingHarder 2376 reads
posted

"I have heard people (usually fairly ignorant people) wonder why a rapist just doesn't hire a prostitute... this misses the point that the rapist desires not "sex", but domination and power. Sex is simply a mode of exercising that power."

That is a false statement.  Over the past 2 years we have interviewed a over 200 accused rapists and other sexual preds along with a large number of victims, psycologists, and LE.  Less than 10% of rapes are non-sexual derived.  Over 90% involve the receiving of sexual fulfillment as the primary driver.

The story that rape is a power play was developed by the Sanger group over 100 years ago and has been used very succesfully ever since by a variety of womens organizations.

Anyway you look at it, rape is a horrible act and the US has over 5 times the number of rapes as the EU and over 3 times the number of all industrialized nations combined.  We can only stop it if we understand what causes it and the simple reality is that in most cases its a guy in heat.

Seeing a provider is not an option in many rape cases primarily because of the legal situation in the US but in some cases because the rapist either has fixated on a particular individual or, as in about 20% of cases, it's a heat of the moment issue(guys in a dorm room with a cute girl, get's over horny (possibly because she's leading him on?), nobody's around so he does it).

Legalization in the US similar to other countries is likely to reduce incidents of rape to some extent.  Estimates range from a 15% reduction to 60%.  Based on my studies I'd lean closer towards a 20-30% reduction, but in reality thats simply a slightly educated guess.

Though many may not like this answer, the best way to reduce incidents of rape in the US appears to be for women to be more careful in how they dress and act around men and for women to use good judgement in avoiding situations where they will be alone with a guy (walking to their car (day or night), inviting him into their house/apt/dorm/hotel, etc.)

It's well and good to say that men simply need to learn to control themselves, but guys who rape generally don't comprehend those words, assuming they even read them.  Changing a few thousand years of anthropology ain't gonna happen overnight.

JTH


-- Modified on 7/31/2003 6:24:01 AM

singleton5457 reads


if you're not in the mood to contemplate something morbid (perhaps) don't read on!

--


i know many a times we all fear the presence of LE. naturally, it goes with the territory here on TER (perhaps more so than any other review board) ... can't you just FEEL their presence?  ;-)

but i'm curious how many have ever considered that there may lurk on this board an "evil" of a wholly more sinister variety. i'm talking about psychopaths that prey on women.

it's a sobering thought to me. perhaps not usual fodder for board discussion. but a thought that entered my head this morning and refused to leave all day (and trust me, no thought would want to spend a whole day in my head ;-)



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Ozymandias3728 reads

Certainly a cross-section of people read these boards, and that could include some very, very bad people... psychopaths, drug traffickers, what-have-you.

I think the "sexual predator" variety of psychopath mainly is thinking on a "power" level, rather than a sexual/erotic level... ie. sex is a MODE of crime, not the motive.

I have heard people (usually fairly ignorant people) wonder why a rapist just doesn't hire a prostitute... this misses the point that the rapist desires not "sex", but domination and power. Sex is simply a mode of exercising that power.

The way the hobby works, though, the power shift is mainly on the provider side, and I don't think that would interest "sexual predators" who are looking for a very "weak" woman/victim... or they are more interested in "street" girls, who are percieved as powerless.

The exception to this, of course, would be someone with a specific fixation on "high-level" escorts, or porn stars, or that kind of thing. Could happen, and caution should always be taken.

Of course, the same caution holds true with any collective of people... neighbors, teachers, guys sitting next to you on the plane.

Frankly, there are probably a lot more psychopaths at this very moment browsing Ebay than browsing TER.

O.

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JustTryingHarder2377 reads

"I have heard people (usually fairly ignorant people) wonder why a rapist just doesn't hire a prostitute... this misses the point that the rapist desires not "sex", but domination and power. Sex is simply a mode of exercising that power."

That is a false statement.  Over the past 2 years we have interviewed a over 200 accused rapists and other sexual preds along with a large number of victims, psycologists, and LE.  Less than 10% of rapes are non-sexual derived.  Over 90% involve the receiving of sexual fulfillment as the primary driver.

The story that rape is a power play was developed by the Sanger group over 100 years ago and has been used very succesfully ever since by a variety of womens organizations.

Anyway you look at it, rape is a horrible act and the US has over 5 times the number of rapes as the EU and over 3 times the number of all industrialized nations combined.  We can only stop it if we understand what causes it and the simple reality is that in most cases its a guy in heat.

Seeing a provider is not an option in many rape cases primarily because of the legal situation in the US but in some cases because the rapist either has fixated on a particular individual or, as in about 20% of cases, it's a heat of the moment issue(guys in a dorm room with a cute girl, get's over horny (possibly because she's leading him on?), nobody's around so he does it).

Legalization in the US similar to other countries is likely to reduce incidents of rape to some extent.  Estimates range from a 15% reduction to 60%.  Based on my studies I'd lean closer towards a 20-30% reduction, but in reality thats simply a slightly educated guess.

Though many may not like this answer, the best way to reduce incidents of rape in the US appears to be for women to be more careful in how they dress and act around men and for women to use good judgement in avoiding situations where they will be alone with a guy (walking to their car (day or night), inviting him into their house/apt/dorm/hotel, etc.)

It's well and good to say that men simply need to learn to control themselves, but guys who rape generally don't comprehend those words, assuming they even read them.  Changing a few thousand years of anthropology ain't gonna happen overnight.

JTH


-- Modified on 7/31/2003 6:24:01 AM

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singleton3067 reads


i agree. the Sanger group has been the darling of radical feminists like Andrea Dworkin and Catharine McKinnon who claim "that's what men are and that's ALL they are" (Dworkin has since retracted that statement, adding the word "potential" to cover her ass) but the anger and resentment are still there in full bloom. it always struck me as odd how and why some feminists would go so far to insist that rape, a primarily sexual perversion, is purely about power-play

what's ruffled academic feathers recently is the new book by evolutionary psychologist Randy Thornhil which has revived some old myths (while inventing some new ones!)

http://www.geocities.com/i_sang_holy_holy/bordering_on_the_absurd.html

the problem is that "evolutionary psychology" is NOT, despite all its pretenses, a "hard" science.


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papercup3442 reads

No shit.  I could see it happening.  Hope it doesn't.

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HiProGlo5177 reads

Unfortunately there are those individuals out there that have sinister intentions. An intelligence source such as this board, or any other for that matter would be a very strong draw for such types.

It is frightening to think that our "community" could be infiltrated by such a predator, and make no mistake that is what we are talking about here, a predator. This is an individual with the ability to focus like a laser beam on what it is they want to achieve, the message they want to send and the method they will use to convey their point.

These types of individuals are not distracted by politics, family, job stress or the worry of their signficant other discovering their infidelity. They have a clarity of purpose and are very aware of their envionment.

Reflecting on the tragic loss of ladies from our community in the past several weeks really affects me. It also drives home the fact that there are lives behind the faces we see. Family, friends, loved ones, children and careers behind the shadow of the people we spend time with.

I pray that we are all vigilant and keep a keen eye trained on lurkers and newcomers. I for one do not want anyone I have met in this hobby to become a casualty.

HPG

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Rocky1233598 reads

That is why I feel like some ladies here are like family to me and I would protect them and help them any way I can. And We all should watch out and help these ladies because they are all real women with real families and loved ones too!

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singleton3598 reads


the casualties we've already suffered (sounds like we're at war) ... that's why it bears repeating: the "gift of fear" book, martial arts, pepper spray and other precautionary measures -- like the recently advocated provider "check-in" service (an excellent resource)

because wasn't it just this last month that we had near actual episodes where predatory MEN (client or not, it's irrelevant) beat and stabbed to death providers we all knew (in TER at least)

--

alright, alright!  :-)  perhaps we're getting too morbid here. how about a little comic relief? ... let's play ... NAME-THAT-MOVIE(TM). this time our memorable quotation is:

"I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream. That's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight... razor... and surviving."


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Luscious Laurel3109 reads

Interesting choice of quote.  Snails have such a keen sense of touch that they are able to crawl over the sharp edge of a razor, without getting hurt.  http://members.lycos.co.uk/Mollusks/Schnecken/land/weinberg/messer.html?   We should all be so attuned to our senses that we might successfully negotiate dangerous situations.  Or maybe it's just really late at night and I'm a little goofy.

It's good to watch out for each other, and I think that always having someone know where we are when we are on a call is important.  The buddy system works, as they taught us in Girl Scouts.

I don't know if your question was of much comic relief, though.  How about this?  

    A snail goes into a bar.  "What do you want?" asks the bartender.

    The snail replies that he wants a drink.

    "Go away, we don't serve snails here."

    The snail pleads with the bartender to give it a drink, at which point
    the bartender gets fed up and kicks the snail out the door.

    Two months later, the snail is back in the bar. "What do YOU want?"
    asks the bartender.

    "What did you do that for?" says the snail.

Sorry, but that was the best snail joke I could come up with.

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singleton3401 reads


your pick of the following two prizes:

1. the honor of being the next person to offer up a NAME-THAT-MOVIE(TM) quote  (remember, the franchise was purchased by me!)

2. a free session with the hobbyist of your choice! (since none would decline ;-)

--

yes, that "comic relief" quote was a tongue-in-cheek joke. y'all should be thankful i didn't pick a more surly one of those "pearls of wisdom" by Col. Kurtz (Marlon Brando)

btw, i had to read that snail joke a coupla times to get it ... what can i say, i'm SLOW!  :-)

LOL

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Cynicalman1759 reads

The sensitive warm & fuzzy side of me(who uses this alias to hide & protect said vulnerabilities)has pondered this very real danger to the ladies countless times. Recent tragic losses in our community has served to again bring it forefront in my mind(as well as others).  
 It would be nice if the lurking LE on these boards would use their time, knowledge & resources to "Serve & protect" in this area of concern rather than their usual harassment, extortion  and prosecution of our community.

  Screen thoroughly ladies. We that care; Understand.

    Cm

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