There's tons of stories I've heard over the years about suckers that get taken by girls. I personally have never given money out for some sob story, I only pay for the service that is being provided. I even got an email once from this girl I had seen a couple of times to bail her out of jail. Well, the email was from her email address but it was her "brother" that was emailing me and asking me to send a grand to a "bail bondsman." Of course I said nope, then I never heard from her again. Don't ever feel guilty about not giving out money to a provider, especially if you barely know her. Don't be a sucker.
Okay, here are all the details, just curious what you think about it.
So a couple weeks ago I saw a visiting provider the first day she was in town. Had a nice time, and a week later I gave her a call to see if we could get together again, on the last day advertised of her stay. Normally I hobby less frequently than that, but there's the visiting factor. Turns out she had to leave a couple days early for various reasons, hotel prices, etc. She asked which guy I was so I gave her a description, and she asked if she could keep my number, I said yes.
Anyways, a couple days she called and left me a message, I was busy and didn't notice it until late at night so I didn't call. The next day she texted and called again, so I call her back and ask if she's back in town. She says she's not back, but she wanted me to help her with something, and if I could send her something. A bit vague, and I'm like okay I'm not sure what you mean, what's up. She eventually says money, and says she can give me her info. I say that I've never sent money before, and that I hope everything's fine with her and she's cool, but I'd be happy to see her when she's back in town. She says she's fine, and she'll call me next time she's back.
That was yesterday, anyways... yeah. First time anything like that has happened, and just a weird, awkward experience. It seems weird that she'd call me asking, a random guy she met for an hour once, and if I hadn't called her looking for that second time she never would've called I guess. Especially odd since she's been around for years, I'd guess I'm not the only guy she called. Oddly enough I kind of feel a bit guilty for not sending her money, in case she really is having problems, but I barely know her, and of course there's no real safe way to do that.
So... yeah, just felt like putting that out there. What do you think, and anything like this happen to you folks?
There's probably not a soul on this board that hasn't been down & out at some point in their lives, but it does seem strange that a lady you've met once--for one hour--would call you for help.
That you've got a heart is something to be proud of, but you ought to be just as proud of having a brain. You've reasoned through it and know it's not a good idea, and it might involve risks as well (beyond never being repaid).
The downside to this could be much worse than the upside.
I'm all for helping folks out, especially people I know, who have done everything they can to help themselves. And I do. But given the data points here, it's hard to get a clear picture of what has her in the predicament she's in, and the potential factors could range from innocent (she's been thrown out of her house, she's in a bad relationship, etc.) to diabolical (she needs her next fix). That whole range spells potential problems for you, especially now that she knows how to contact you.
I have, however, been text'd, emailed and called to say that 'she' was in dire straits and needed some work. A couple were pissed off that i didn't plan to see them an longer. Some, i made plans with right then and there. And 1 in particular simply asked to me to come and stay the weekend with her. If i've given them the green light to call me I don't think nothing of it.
Rule of thumb; Solicitations of that nature open the door for more serious questions/problems.
It was someone I had seen more than once - I did politely decline. As much as I wanted to help out, there is the business aspect to it and I can't do it for everyone.
Another situation that arose was when a lady I had seen several times called me a couple of times asking if she could see me. It was clear that she needed the money and I did see her. However, as these calls became more and more frequent, I had to let her know that if I was able to see her and hd time (and the $$, but I didn't say that), I would let her know.
She probably spent the day on her fat ass calling and texting hobbyists looking for suckers. If she contacted you, she probably contacted 50 other hobbyists looking for as many suckers as she can find.
It's a shame that she would rather spend her time on the phone as opposed to on her back.
Well arent you just a gentleman?
It's a shame that she would rather spend her time on the phone as opposed to on her back.
I used to get requests to "help me out," i.e., for money from regular women all the time. That is one of many reasons I will only hobby from now on. For the most part providers tend to be upfront and honest; what I call an "honest insincerity", and I respect that. Never had a provider request "help" other than the agreed upon donation.
I have been asked before, by two different ladies I'd seen quite a few times. Like an idiot, I sent both money and while both have promised to pay me back (in time spent with them), I have yet to "collect." Live and learn, and I have. Never again!
I'm old school and I'm hear to tell you that it happens all of the time. It's awkward when it does happen but you did the right thing. I am hearing more and more about men who have just called to ask questions or inquire about an appointment getting texted and hassled for whatever reason.
Times ARE tough but it was in poor form for her to have asked you for monetary assistance. Of course, though, if you had said yes ... then she would have achieved what she needed for that time.
If you do decide to give funds to anyone, including an escort, be prepared to not be paid back. That's pretty much should be a standard expectation if you loan money to anyone, though.
Hugs,
Elisabeth
Consider it a gift, never consider it a loan. If you keep that always in mind, you'll be ok, and may even be pleasantly surprised when a lady pays you back.
if a client should foolish feel compelled to lend money to a provider that requests it.
Should we be surprised that the same financial advice regarding casinos, investments (equities, fixed income, FX), and relatives also be applicable to providers?
No offense intended to providers and clients alike, but why is it so difficult for both groups to remember that our relationship is grounded in a simple business transaction? One where certain services are provided for payments rendered.
Doing so would eliminate so many cases of ripped off clients (loans gone bad), heartbroken clients (unrequited love gone bad), and unprofessional acts (e.g. no calls, no shows).
happened to me.
The providers I've seen know that I'm not stupid to fall for a trick like that. Instead, they target other clients that are either naive or more easily swayed.
I applaud you on sensing something was amiss enough to ask your fellow hobbyists.
But your common sense should be enough to warn you to "Just say No".
For further background reading, I direct you to search out the "TashaVegas" thread on the TER Las Vegas forum. The client in question lost out on $8,000, but I understand that he is slowly getting repaid back on some sort of annuity plan from the provider.
Be warned: just read the "TashaVegas" thread (it's excellent reading). Don't attempt to start a similar flame one in this forum LOL.
So a couple weeks ago I saw a visiting provider the first day she was in town. Had a nice time, and a week later I gave her a call to see if we could get together again, on the last day advertised of her stay. Normally I hobby less frequently than that, but there's the visiting factor. Turns out she had to leave a couple days early for various reasons, hotel prices, etc. She asked which guy I was so I gave her a description, and she asked if she could keep my number, I said yes.
Anyways, a couple days she called and left me a message, I was busy and didn't notice it until late at night so I didn't call. The next day she texted and called again, so I call her back and ask if she's back in town. She says she's not back, but she wanted me to help her with something, and if I could send her something. A bit vague, and I'm like okay I'm not sure what you mean, what's up. She eventually says money, and says she can give me her info. I say that I've never sent money before, and that I hope everything's fine with her and she's cool, but I'd be happy to see her when she's back in town. She says she's fine, and she'll call me next time she's back.
That was yesterday, anyways... yeah. First time anything like that has happened, and just a weird, awkward experience. It seems weird that she'd call me asking, a random guy she met for an hour once, and if I hadn't called her looking for that second time she never would've called I guess. Especially odd since she's been around for years, I'd guess I'm not the only guy she called. Oddly enough I kind of feel a bit guilty for not sending her money, in case she really is having problems, but I barely know her, and of course there's no real safe way to do that.
So... yeah, just felt like putting that out there. What do you think, and anything like this happen to you folks?
If I had a nickel for every time a provider emailed or texted me for money, I'd be rich. Oh wait, I am rich. Perhaps that's why they contact me. I don't mind paying gals to have fun but until I become a bank or a relative, it's a job and I don't do payday loans.
I only turn the hobby phone ON when I am playing.
I have a couple of providers who are short of cash. Who isn't these days? But because of TER, I know enough to be on guard. If I know a lady is hard pressed, I would schedule an appointment... COD = cash on delivery... if I wanted to help her out.
I would say that a solicited loan or payment is even less likely to be repaid.
skb
In January I was was heading to Las Vegas and had been in contact with this one chick that I've seen a few times before. I live about 1000 miles away. Anyway about 5 days before my trip we were texting and she said she wasn't doing good. I asked why, and she replied that she wasn't gonna be able to pay her rent. I had a pretty good idea what was gonna happen next. So then she asked If I could wire her money through Western Union. I told her " No Fucking Way". She gave me some bs saying that I would have all her information and it would be safe.
Anyway I never saw her that trip and just ignored her. It puts a bad taste in my mouth til today. For one, we wern't even that close-meaning not very good friends. She should have asked the guys she told me she was seeing. I gaurentee they have more money than me.
Im 22, don't ask me for money lol.
I did pay one providers cell phone bill, but she never asked me, I offered. She didn't have a credit card and I offered to pay it. Minimal cost anyway.
22 yrs old, you showed remarkable poise and great wisdom in turning down that provider's request for rent money.
I honestly don't know if I had the wherewithal at that age to act as intelligently as you did. I'd like to believe that I would have done the right thing, but I just don't know.
In any event, well done!
Anyway I never saw her that trip and just ignored her. It puts a bad taste in my mouth til today. For one, we wern't even that close-meaning not very good friends. She should have asked the guys she told me she was seeing. I gaurentee they have more money than me.
Im 22, don't ask me for money lol.
I did pay one providers cell phone bill, but she never asked me, I offered. She didn't have a credit card and I offered to pay it. Minimal cost anyway.
if she need a loan there a plenty of payday loans places out there
There's tons of stories I've heard over the years about suckers that get taken by girls. I personally have never given money out for some sob story, I only pay for the service that is being provided. I even got an email once from this girl I had seen a couple of times to bail her out of jail. Well, the email was from her email address but it was her "brother" that was emailing me and asking me to send a grand to a "bail bondsman." Of course I said nope, then I never heard from her again. Don't ever feel guilty about not giving out money to a provider, especially if you barely know her. Don't be a sucker.
Thanks for all the replies, I feel better about it now. Oh yeah, for the record, I know it wasn't a loan and I wouldn't get repaid, it was more the giving my info and possibly opening the door to more of that that concerned me there.
It's nice to get knowledge from everyone's experiences.