Howdy ladies.
I've enjoyed the company of a few ladies over the past few years, and have written what I think are good reviews.
Here's my question:
Does my body size/shape REALLY matter to you?
I'm a pretty big boy...I buy many of my clothes at the Big & Tall store.
I'm very, very masculine, super clean, very nice and respectful (I ALWAYS offer compliments as we play and always say "Thank you.")
I am very self  conscious of my size, cause I do have a good size belly and man boobs. I wasn't always heavy, but got so in the past few years after divorce...I got really depressed.
Anyway, should I tell the gal in advance that I'm big? Or does it not matter to you? I have told some of the gals I can leave my T-shirt on if they want, but they have said it is up to me.
I know it's my issue, not yours...
But...
Does it turn you off? Would you prefer not to touch my belly? Is there a position I should avoid so that YOU are most comfortable?
Any replies would be appreciated.

-- Modified on 8/10/2015 7:19:15 PM

I'll bet you that if ANYTHING about you SERIOUSLY bothers the providers you see and who get questioned by your next prospect during screening, that the lady you're hoping to make a date with would turn you down. If that hasn't happened, then probably they have found you a very suitable client.

as I see it..there is not one perfect person on the planet...I am certainly not..

had a 500lbr once...and it was an awesome date...yes, he realized his size and i realized his size, but he was comfortable with himself and very cheery...spending time with him was so much fun...he asked me to stay the night with him knowing that i would have to sleep on the couch and he had his cpap machine...we could not have intimacy the "old fashion" way, but we did do other activities that were quite fulfilling for both of us...his attitude about himself made him sexy to me

"I'm very, very masculine, super clean, very nice and respectful (I ALWAYS offer compliments as we play and always say "Thank you.")"

I am more interested in a connection with your mind and heart and the rest will come easily. Size doesn't matter to me if the connection is there during the date.

I always feel bad for people who ask questions like these because if a hundred women were to tell you that they think you're sexy just how you are it probably wouldn't change the way you feel about your body. In addition you're about to deal with a bunch of guys telling you to lose weight as if the thought has never crossed your mind.

i actually prefer men like kevin james myself..

What is important is everything else you mentioned about yourself, you sound like a wonderful man. If anything to put your mind at ease you could mention you are "Big and Tall", that way you have given a heads up - will take some of the stress off of you.

Thank you.

Thank you for your honesty.

I really appreciate your honesty.

Very insightful. You have really made me think.  
Perhaps I am putting too much pressure on myself than I need to.
I think your advice will also hold true in the dating world.
Thanks

Honestly, when I see clients I don't think much about what they look like.  For me it's more about making eye contact, making a connection, talking, feeling safe, being able to relax.  There have been one or two times that it's occurred to me a guy was particularly attractive or unattractive, but it was really a thought that just blipped through my brain when we met.  Heck, there have been a few times when the guy walked in and I could tell in an instant that he was not attracted to me! (I'm pretty sure they had fun anyway, hehe)

Thanks for your honesty.
You seem to be genuine.
As for touching a big guy's big part (belly, etc.), yes, it could be uncomfortable. Possibly. We're already self conscious about it, regardless if people say we shouldn't be. It's human nature.
But if done with genuine feeling for wanting to make a guy feel good, it might be nice. :

Thank you, Alyssa.

Obviously I can only speak for myself, but size, in many ways, doesn't matter to me at all. I rather like it in general when human beings have some meat on their bones, so to speak.  

Fat guy with hot chick lol.  

Speaking for myself only I do not have any issue with a gent who has a bigger body size.Not a turn off for me.
This is my job I know us providers do not have to see every gent who contacts us but as long as I can verify a gent and as you said " masculine, super clean, very nice and respectful"that is the main thing.
I have seen many guys who are taller/larger and some who are very big.
If it makes you feel more comfortable you could mention your body size when booking an appt if a provider has a problem I am sure at that time she would say something.
Not every guy looks like he just walked off the cover of GQ magazine.
I find one of the biggest turn-ons is a man's confidence.
Wishing you the best of luck and don't worry about it.
This world of ours is about finding intimacy for the gents if there are providers who have an issue with your size there is many who don't.

One of my favorite clients has a big belly that hangs over his belt. His belly hits me in the forehead when I give him a BJ, and his belly sits on my crotch in missionary position.
But it doesn't bother me at all.
He is very clean (the most important, at any size!!), takes a good shower at the beginning of each session, and he is super respectful and kind. I love seeing him!

You're welcome

I read overweight men are better lovers.

I have the same problem.  When setting up a date I let a new friend know that I am "big" and allow them to ask for clarification if they wish.  Most have no problem but a few have asked and suggested that I look elsewhere.  No problem at all.

As long as your hygiene is very good, no issues at all. This is the only thing I have ever had an issue with, albeit with a thin or large person. Good hygiene no matter your size = good time had by all.  

Good lord, look at the average American male these days. The military is having problems finding in shape guys to recruit.
Add years and inactivity and we have a society full of belt busters.

Posted By: roadkingusa

Howdy ladies.  
 I've enjoyed the company of a few ladies over the past few years, and have written what I think are good reviews.  
 Here's my question:  
 Does my body size/shape REALLY matter to you?  
 I'm a pretty big boy...I buy many of my clothes at the Big & Tall store.  
 I'm very, very masculine, super clean, very nice and respectful (I ALWAYS offer compliments as we play and always say "Thank you.")  
 I am very self  conscious of my size, cause I do have a good size belly and man boobs. I wasn't always heavy, but got so in the past few years after divorce...I got really depressed.  
 Anyway, should I tell the gal in advance that I'm big? Or does it not matter to you? I have told some of the gals I can leave my T-shirt on if they want, but they have said it is up to me.  
 I know it's my issue, not yours...  
 But...  
 Does it turn you off? Would you prefer not to touch my belly? Is there a position I should avoid so that YOU are most comfortable?  
 Any replies would be appreciated.

-- Modified on 8/10/2015 7:19:15 PM

....in my case I don't have a problem with bigger men. Now some positions might not be so easy depending on shape/weight but we'll make it work. I'll praise kiss, rub, lick, touch all over your body no matter what it looks like....i'm not here to make fun of you or make you feel bad. Any professional worth their salt is not gonna make you feel like less than a human being because of belly and man-boobs.

The answers soany of you gave to my question have helped IMMENSELY. Not strictly for my occasional visit with a provider, but for life in general as it pertains to finding a new life partner.

Courtney, I have a credit card that vibrates. Want to try it out? lol

It doesn't sound like you're morbidly obese or anything, so unless she specifically asks for height/weight/whatever, I wouldn't worry about it.  

I mean, I'm 100% with you, but let's call it what it is, eh?  

You will get treated with respect while with me, however I am not remotely attracted to obese anyone. I am human but the money does have a way to mask what I really feel.

meaning that it is okay for men to be shallow and want what they want, I feel it is okay for me to be the same way. In p4p I feel the money makes  having to be with someone you would not ever be with the deciding factor. I knew this going in and if I am being paid, I act professionally and with respect. BUT it does not change how I really feel.

The "i am very, very masculine". What does this have to do with your obesity? Or is it in relation to your man boobs? And really what does that mean...you pound your chest, you grunt like a caveman, .....? You do know that even women possibly has a  different version of what masculine is and your version might be the antithesis of the next hooker you meet?

Yep! And that's usually where you find it.

And I said "no" later. Just FYI

I'm also a big guy and handle it exactly the same way.  I've been in the hobby exactly one year now and my physical size has never been an issue so far.  Like the OP, I was similarly concerned but was reassured by TER threads like this one.  Fortunately virtually every lady I've seen has been absolutely terrific about it.

Posted By: joecarter

I have the same problem.  When setting up a date I let a new friend know that I am "big" and allow them to ask for clarification if they wish.  Most have no problem but a few have asked and suggested that I look elsewhere.  No problem at all.  
   
 The last thing I want is for anyone to be uncomfortable during a visit - it is hard to hide.  
   
 I am blessed that I have found a few very special regular friends who know well how to "push my buttons".

And you just made him worse, you MHB.  LOL!  I'd tell you to lighten up, but I know you won't.

Like I said to him...a good diet and exercise program will rid him of those pesky man boobs and he won't have to try and convince others of his hyper masculinity...just saying.

ith a fat guy his individual flaw/weakness/challenge is obvious for all to see.  everyone has their own flaws, for example,
you can't tell that someone is a judgemental, ignorant master of the obvious asshole until they open their pie-hole

If for no other reason than staying healthy.  Height is a function of genetics, but weight is something you can manage with diet and exercise if you are diligent enough. It's up to you...

WOW! And I thought you were coming for me!

And a burden on our health system and there is no way in hell I am going  to accept that as a normal state of being. You are fat, so if you don't want others stating the obvious change your self and don't expect others to change for you.

Fat acceptance is utter bullshit and no way am I ever going to accept that as the norm. And the fatties can cry me a fat laden river for all I care. It is a choice, stop stuffing your face with comfort food, go fix what is emotionally broken and get off your fat asses and move.

Who gives a fuck what you "accept"?

again, who gives a shit about what you "accept as the norm".

I see!

That is generally considered a reply to the one above.  

I have. A fat guy approached me and asked me out and I told him, lose 70 pounds and you would have a shot, but as of now forget it. He wanted a fit firm body and so do I.

not mad - just a returned insult.  fire with fire dude.  I would love for you to say your nonsense to someones face though. I'll bring pop-corn (low-cal of course)

nah, you are classic pussy.  not mad, just pointing out the obvious.

A freaking trick calls out a fat hooker and do I see you two running out saying...."say it to her face". And not a dude.

I bet you H+T has more than enough guts to tell you face to face, but then what? Are you going to beat her up to prove how manly you are? Just what is your plan the next time a woman tells you to your face that you are a fat ass?  I say the "next time" because I guaranfuckingtee you it's happened before.

Oh yeah he has been chided before because of his weight by a woman. I already told him I have refused guys outright to their faces for being fat...not in P4P but IRL where I can choose who touches me. And I am as shallow as you my good friend...I want hot, tight and fit.

The way he has followed you around being nasty about your comments shows he's not only fat but seriously over-sensitive about it.
I spend at least five days a week in the gym or out on the road and I have zero tolerance for people who don't take care of themselves and show control over what they shove down their pie hole.

-- Modified on 8/12/2015 10:35:14 PM

Genetics weren't kind to me on height...I was always the smallest kid in the class, and the bullies had a heyday beating up the little kid.  But now most of them are are obese and unsightly, and their health problems dwarf mine.  But that is no matter here...it's usually been the tallest ladies who've been my best friends.  Not always, though...

-- Modified on 8/13/2015 5:13:03 AM

Your very welcome! None of us are perfect so it is nice to find people that accepts us for us and have a great time!!!  

Posted By: roadkingusa

I really appreciate your honesty.