A few years ago I was in a relationship with a woman who had some mental health issues. I did some Internet research and made some suggestions, which accomplished nothing. Eventually we went our separate ways. So proceed with caution.
A lady I saw recently became my favorite experience doing this. She is beautiful / friendly and we had a great session.But, before seeing her , I read a review where someone has a bad experience because he thinks she is being forced to do this by a pimp. She advertises as an independent but I do not believe this. She had a bruise on the eye area that suggests somebody hit her. Maybe, I shouldn't make assumptions? Any way, I could not be disrespectful enough to ask if she has personal issues. And I felt so sad for her, I just wanted to tell her everything would be ok and that I could help her out ... But I can't. Should I not see her again? I just can not wrap my mind around booking a girl doing this against her will. At the same time, I wonder if I am doing wrong by not booking her. She was not "suffering" during our date. We had some chemistry, I know that. And by giving her money for her companionship, she is not abused by the alleged pimp.
in just asking her if she is truly ok.
Move on.
Sounds like a BP girl.
There's more of them.
Do not get involved!
You will lose money, get very frustrated, regret it and could possibly get in harm's way.
I had my heart strings tugged a few years ago and several thousand dollars later and being harrassed by her ex-boyfriend, I escaped the trap I had fallen in.
Move on quickly.
It is to enjoy yourself.
No, if I were you, I would not go see her again. You will undoubtedly feel compelled to involve yourself in her personal affairs to the great detriment of both of you.
We need to have some kind of a code like on Star Trek: The Prime Directive: Never interfere with another culture, or in this case, a provider.
The directive, as illustrated by Captain baldy himself once, is as much for the protection of themselves as the culture they are avoiding interference with.
If only we followed it better.
But I think the OP has this in mind
I liked her a lot as a provider and I am still kind off new to the hobby. Knowing I can suppress my emotions for her situation, is it still a bad idea to see her if I suspect she has a pimp? Strictly for service. It's hard to find threads with the search engine on this, help?
-- Modified on 4/3/2013 12:43:40 PM
....as I have two homes, a number of hours apart. One is the economicallyadvantaged DC area, the other is just a fucking economical mess. Apparently DC doesn't let the money flow very far from the city, but that is another thread for another day.
There have been two providers in that other area who have just been heart breaking to me, and I have not gone back to see either a 2nd time. I know that I am a sap, it is just my nature, and that I will not be able to resist becoming more involved beyond the client-provider relationship.
My point is that only you can answer your own question, because only you know how strong your resolve is given the situation. I am hopeless with that shit, just raised to always help others no matter what and this hobby does not lend itself well to people like that. I am more than generous to my lovers. like many others I much more often than not compensate above and beyond their rate. But this is not because I feel sorry for them but rather because they make the additional effort of satiating my emotional needs.
I truly believe that only you can answer this one for yourself
YES. It is a bad idea to see her if you believe that she is not operating under her own free will. Wtf?
The problem is I don't know... I just made an assumption. I know what you mean, thanx.
Since you posted this here rather than the newbie board I am assuming that you want the hard and fast version.
IF you feel she is being pimped...how do YOU feel about that? If it's any sort of issue...move along.
Much of the pimp question revolves around what is a pimp. Agency owners are pimps...would YOU not see a hooker from an agency? Boyfriends/Girlfriends and hubbies are invariably pimp material. Would YOU not see a hooker with a BF/GF or SO/hubby? They may NOT be a pimp in the sense that you are thinking...but quite often they are lurking in the background waiting for janey hooker to bring home the bacon.
Go and read more on this topic on the newbie board....learn to search and you'll find quite a few threads on this topic which are entertaining.
At the end of the day...it's all on YOU. Don't think for one millisecond that a hooker is looking for YOUR help. They're looking for your money...end of story!!!!
-- Modified on 4/3/2013 12:43:40 PM
Be wary.
Some girls just hop from enabler to enabler. So offer her advice, help, even money. But don't expect miracles. Ask yourself what exactly is keeping her there?
If she wants to help herself, she can. But, in the doubtful case that she's 1 in a million who genuinely wants to get out but is trapped, no harm in offering a helping hand. Just watch out, because things are often not what they seem in this hobby. Sweet girls (especially those who want your pity) can actually be very dangerous.
But if you want to, offer her help in a way that will minimize your potential, risk, and the probability countless 3am phone calls telling you she is homeless again.
Been there...tried to be a rescuer myself at one time. Twice, sort of. I don't regret trying, but they both made me wish we'd never met
This is a tricky situation... Someone being forced to work against their will is not good. And because of monetary quotas, girls quickly learn how to be good at what they do and not let you see the typical signs of abuse during your session. But if you don't know her full story, you really don't know if she is totally being forced, or if she chooses to work and just got caught up with a controlling asshole and a bad situation. Those two different perspectives can mean a lot.
Someone that is totally being forced might appreciate you dropping a dime on the person trafficking her. Going that route, with all the anti-trafficking stuff going on today, should provide her with resources and options of how to get her life back. The national hotline for reporting suspected human trafficking (anonymously) is 888-3737-888
But if she *wants* to work, and just can't get away from her pimp, she might prefer a way out that doesn't involve the authorities as that could jam her up if she has other things on her record, other crimes she's involved in, custody issues, etc. etc. In that case, my suggestion would be to research if there are any outreach programs that might be able to help her in your area, without getting her in trouble. SWOP-USA.com has chapters all over the US, but there are other groups like SexWorkersProject.org in NY, HIPS.org in DC and the FreedomNetworkUSA.org that are sex worker rights based support services. If an opportune moment comes up, you could just hand her a list of resources, and tell her that they might be able to provide support for her if she needs it and leave it at that.
As far as seeing her again, only you can answer that. If she's being pimped and therefore not in control of what clients she has to service, she probably appreciates every decent guy she gets to spend time with...but then again, might hate every date she has regardless of who it's with if she is totally being forced to work. You have to go by your own conscience there...
Your thoughts are great help posters. I decided, I will see her again. As long as she doesn't bring her pimp into my life, I can see her for business. I did feel appreciated and the hotel situation felt pretty safe. Maybe , I made the mistake of painting an image of extreme pain in her part. That is far from the truth, she did seem to have and enjoy her "nice" things. Obviously she gets some good cash.
Thanx again.
Reading your post makes me want to grab an axe, and chop up a pimp.
Just so you know. Pigs will eat the pieces...
Don't let that type of anger cloud your judgement.
If I were you..
I would not see her again...
If you're wondering if she's being abused, ask her. She might tell the truth but don't expect it. Tell her you noticed the bruise on her eye and ask her how she got it. Her reaction to the question will tell you what you need to know. It doesn't hurt to tell her that you're uncomfortable with someone who's being abused, if anything, she might spill her guts and you'll get the real picture up front.
Pimps come in all flavors from the street-walker beaters to the bf/husband who's living off the back of the "SO" he supposedly cares about. I have a problem with all the pimp variants including some agencies but not particularly assistants. Some providers prefer assistants to handle screening and the business stuff they don't want or don't have time to deal with. You'll learn over time how to tell who's being used and who's doing it of their own free will and you'll find that sticking with providers who are indies with or without an assistant will give you the best experiences long term.
A few years ago I was in a relationship with a woman who had some mental health issues. I did some Internet research and made some suggestions, which accomplished nothing. Eventually we went our separate ways. So proceed with caution.
Straight forward Pimping is one thing - but physical abuse a more serious matter.
You need to weigh the options of getting involved - but at the very least I would hand her some info
on support services for battered women. No one (woman or child) should be at the mercy of an abuser.
Redhot has some good info in his post below: