TER General Board

My ATF (long time ago)
Cardinal_Richelieu 621 reads
posted

Prior to marriage, I had a great relationship with my ATF.  Lots of OTC get-togethers. Long story short: she was a mature lady, older than myself, but I truly think that if I had asked her to run away and give up the life, she would have at least considered it. In retrospect.......

ILoveToFuck2994 reads

This is a question especially for the providers.  I read from a sex education book that women who retire from this profession almost never end up getting married and end up hating men. Is there any truth to that?  To the providers, please answer this with your absolute honesty.

. And a very teeny percventage are former or current clients, Very small percentage.  
    I actually at this stage my life could give two fucks about sex. i could take it or leave it its not really a huge thing on my mind daily like at all even.
             Speak for yourself because for me all men are definetly not categorized as either ones i fuck for free or ones i dont fuck. I do have and have had guys i never fucked that were considered best friends, In fact the one that gave me the name angel that passed away, Him and i refered to one another as best friends yet never slept together, Just best friends. Did everything together.

Oh really, well you aren't even that, you rude-ass mothafucker

They're easy, confirm what the majority think they already know, and are rarely backed by any serious intellectual rigor. If I had to guess I'd say this "fact" in the sex "education" book you read, if based on anything at all, is anecdotal. So I'll give my opinion, also based on nothing at all: providers who retire from providing and don't get married probably weren't going to get married anyway, and if they hate men it's because they hated them to begin with, or were also destined to hate men not because they chose to provide for a living, but because of many complex factors that will vary by the experience, perceptions, and coping mechanisms of each individual. To unilaterally blame providing as a root cause is both lazy and stupid. Personally I've never encountered a provider where I detected anything like hatred; boredom and indifference, sure, and BSC once, but never hatred. I'd be interested to know if anyone ever saw a provider and felt waves of man-hate was coming off of her.

With your very well thought out and intelligent view. However let's be clear, if you have been in this biz long enough you will see and feel unjust dislike and even hatred for many different reasons!

You called it, I wont be getting married cuz I dont want too.  
Dont have anything to do with the fact I escorted, danced starred in porn, smut mags.  
Hey if your a struggling musician, /artist, which I was and many the ladies here are artist .I truly believed i was gonna be a huge rock star! Like wicked bad! I am glad i tryed but i think stay at home single mom is gonna be more suiting for me now. I look forward to that.
Sounds like he may have a picture in his head that like marriage is like the end goal in life? I dont think for me it would work i am not into rules and things that involve lawyers.
   Like gee some day when i retire i will marry and blah blah,  
I personally dont plan on retiring i will be the lady that 50 sayin shes 40 and still gettin 350 an hour and there are plenty on here doin it, This kinda work truly keeps you in good shape too,  
 They did a study once using money as a motivator in weight loss and the subjects in the study exceled in thier diets!
                           Hmm yes that is generalizing that all escorts become bitter and desire marriage as end result. Which isnt true. I dont see what there would be too be bitter about escorts get all the free time they want to pursue hobbies art music interest other women, with 9-5 dont have the pleasure of doing they are too busy, I think the non escorts are proberly more bittere than the escorts, i know i would be,  

 It aint a bad way to supplement income, I think most guys would too if they could, But there is no market for straight escorts male. Theyd have to dance or do gay escorting which is marketable.  
      I love guys myself. Always have,they rock. ...xo

Posted By: thehumanist
They're easy, confirm what the majority think they already know, and are rarely backed by any serious intellectual rigor. If I had to guess I'd say this "fact" in the sex "education" book you read, if based on anything at all, is anecdotal. So I'll give my opinion, also based on nothing at all: providers who retire from providing and don't get married probably weren't going to get married anyway, and if they hate men it's because they hated them to begin with, or were also destined to hate men not because they chose to provide for a living, but because of many complex factors that will vary by the experience, perceptions, and coping mechanisms of each individual. To unilaterally blame providing as a root cause is both lazy and stupid. Personally I've never encountered a provider where I detected anything like hatred; boredom and indifference, sure, and BSC once, but never hatred. I'd be interested to know if anyone ever saw a provider and felt waves of man-hate was coming off of her.
^^^ This.

It depends on the person. Same here, and everywhere... Obviously some circumstances could cause a woman not to want to see a dick again, but for your everyday willing escort, I doubt it.

I think many people try to figure out a reason for everything, so they blame the easiest thing to blame. Prostitution is too easy to point to when needing an explanation for not wanting to get married.

BUT - I do know I'll be able to tell if a guy is seeing an escort, or even cheating at all after being in the sex trade, which can be more than a curse than a blessing.

Instead of calling this something to retire from, why not just call it a season of life, where you can look back and say, "I totally just did that." And move on.  

Another thing to think about --- maybe ladies entering want independent lives already and don't want to marry simply out of personal preference.

-- Modified on 12/29/2014 11:54:04 AM

I know of many more cases where a gal became an escort after getting divorced and has no intention of getting married.

I think that is far more common.

I was the first to french kiss out of my friends, My first french kiss was in third grade. i was the most advanced and developed at 5 ft 4 in 5th grade .  
 early bloomer, i dated older guys, My bf was in 8th grade when i was in fifth.
             I am and always have been "boy crazy".
  I dont want to get married and never will. But that has nothing to do disdain for men, I will live with a man and have before .
 I just am not interested in a monogomous lifestyle nor will i ever be, i tried it many times, shacked up and tried, I dont care for that lifestyle so i wont be doing that.
              I am open to shacking up but they have to be ok with me escorting.
But i love men and love escorting. I love civvie sex too but it has to be powerful alpha males that kick ass and take names with tats and muscles and flawless model faces. Thats the only guys i fuck in civvie life. Sorry.
 hmm.......................................... like this guy!  
I d swallow with this guy,.
 but marriage? totally boring , i like escorting and i love having flings, I d love company around house though /roomate type fuck buddy thing though,  
        and have done that many times before, and would again, Marraiage? lame. lame . lame. all set with that crap.!

Title and author or it didn't happen.  

Posted By: ILoveToFuck
This is a question especially for the providers.  I read from a sex education book that women who retire from this profession almost never end up getting married and end up hating men. Is there any truth to that?  To the providers, please answer this with your absolute honesty.

writing a book on it? ewe. I like james patterson, norah roberts or Dean koontz .  
   There is no book on what escorts do or dont when they retire because no one would read it, that is like the boringest subject ever.
  The amount that actualy escort that people dont know they even do too is way too high to actualy do a legit study on that.
                    Many wmen you never expect escort with normal jobs husbands and lives, in fact proberly more of them doin it are married than un married, Why you think they all blur thier face and wear wigs? most are married with kids or have boyfriends they live with, ....

Although, I try to be optimistic and believe that most kids are not dumb enough to take that shit at face value.

I still maintain that the OP just didn't have the balls to say "I have unsubstantiated misconceptions about sex workers that I'd like validated, please."

I'm gonna start trying that "I read it...in a book" tactic from now on, though. Check it out: 89% of people born after 1993 are mouth-breathers. I read it. In a book.

ILoveToFuck690 reads

No, you are wrong. There is an actual book.  The title of the book is  

"Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex: But Were Afraid to Ask"  
Author: David R. Reuben M.D.

 
By the way, I saw your TER profile. You are HOT !  I would like to book a session with you :)

GaGambler659 reads

Do you really think it has even the slightest relevance today?

Your answer certainly validates the reason that many asked what book you found this nonsense in.

I have an equally stupid, but very relevant question for you, Just how old are you?

hotplants543 reads

I vaguely remember reading this book as a teenager, and thinking: WTF?. I perused the updated ver in a used bookstore recently, and had the same reaction. Still pretty cringe-worthy----mixed with some occasional laugh-out-loud moments.  

The book should really be called:  Everything Your Grandmother Warned You About (that turned out not to be true).

GaGambler620 reads

Especially if it meant putting a single penny in the pocket of the author.

I do wonder if the OP is a young fool, or an old fool. What's your guess?

hotplants533 reads

1. How much flippin' money this "Dr" Rueben fella has made on this piece of shite.
2. That anyone, young or old, reads this book (the original or new and updated) and takes it seriously

Posted By: ILoveToFuck
No, you are wrong. There is an actual book.  The title of the book is  
   
 "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex: But Were Afraid to Ask"    
 Author: David R. Reuben M.D.  
   
   
 By the way, I saw your TER profile. You are HOT !  I would like to book a session with you :)

She seems to be doin ok for herself, Retired in arizona. i have not heard of any cases of notoriously known retired escorts that are bitter and do not marry.  
 I dont hear of many retired escorts even bein on the radar enough to have books written on how they decide to live thier life after escorting, i actually never heard or cared to hear i guess about he subject, how boring, no offense, Last subject i d ever post athread on is , me and wether i will marry when i retire, i dont think thats really a exciting thread or thought to even wanna open a discuassion on, its actually kinda lame, but ok.

Love your insights and posts plus the fact your beautiful! Know this doesn't have anything to do with this thread , just thought I throw this in! 😊

portion because a great majority of their johns are married, ergo they are cheating. But I think it's a really big stretch to say they end up hating men.  

In fact I will go so far as to say they get a better insight into men and are more apt to not put up with what a lot of non hookers deal with.

Apparently you haven't spent much time around other gals in the business.

So "in fact" few seem to have any better insight into men...and tend to put up with much of the same shit that any woman does.

Perhaps I simply haven't met the gals that you know  LOL

Posted By: hbyist+truth=;(
portion because a great majority of their johns are married, ergo they are cheating. But I think it's a really big stretch to say they end up hating men.  
   
 In fact I will go so far as to say they get a better insight into men and are more apt to not put up with what a lot of non hookers deal with.

Cardinal_Richelieu622 reads

Prior to marriage, I had a great relationship with my ATF.  Lots of OTC get-togethers. Long story short: she was a mature lady, older than myself, but I truly think that if I had asked her to run away and give up the life, she would have at least considered it. In retrospect.......

We all like what we like and will surround ourselves with it. Your chosen perspective is no more fact than hers ;-)

What a shocker  ;)

I guess your "facts" are just as relevant as anyone else's.

BTW...what kind of gals do I like to hang with?  I don't recall ever discussing that in particular.

Posted By: OhCharlie
We all like what we like and will surround ourselves with it. Your chosen perspective is no more fact than hers ;-)

If one was to follow your posts, it would appear that all the girls you know have poor business and personal management skills, along with a whole string of other negative stereotypes. You discuss it every time one of your personal anecdotes begins with "all the girls I've met are old/fat/poor/have no self esteem/can't manage money/can't manage boyfriends.... Etc"  

Even if you didn't constantly talk about "the girls you know", your inability to ever say anything that isn't demeaning or calls into question our ability to do or handle this or that, or even allow a lady to say something is going well for her speaks volumes. If you've shared a positive experience in say, the last two or three years, by all means. Correct me. But the overwhelming evidence suggests you just aren't having that much fun either because of poor luck or poor choices. That really doesn't have anything to do with the rest of the population here, no matter how much you try to beat it into the culture.  

You can't even let go of a statement that you literally cannot even disagree with. "We all like what we like". What are you suggesting, by saying that I'm trying to speak for everyone? That some people don't like what they like? That a strangers enjoyment and personal feelings require the great Dr WhatTheFucks approval? That people avoid what they enjoy because in some weird way that makes more sense so you can disagree with me?

Pfft.  

Even the TER admins have called you out for being a negative nancy. Don't make up questions about my words when you can't even remember your own. Especially when they are clear as day on the same thread ;-)

Odd that I would suggest the gals I know are old/fat/poor/have no self esteem blah blah blah.  I know I haven't posted that.

Now it would seem that many gals who post nonsense here and I call them out for clarification may fit that criteria.  Actually that is more accurate....but I don't want to burst your little fantasy.

And you honestly want to use that TERAdmin called me out...really?   LOL

Try and think for yourself...it helps with the thought process.

For that matter go back and read my reply to the OP...since you misread that post as well!

Posted By: OhCharlie
If one was to follow your posts, it would appear that all the girls you know have poor business and personal management skills, along with a whole string of other negative stereotypes. You discuss it every time one of your personal anecdotes begins with "all the girls I've met are old/fat/poor/have no self esteem/can't manage money/can't manage boyfriends.... Etc"    
   
 Even if you didn't constantly talk about "the girls you know", your inability to ever say anything that isn't demeaning or calls into question our ability to do or handle this or that, or even allow a lady to say something is going well for her speaks volumes. If you've shared a positive experience in say, the last two or three years, by all means. Correct me. But the overwhelming evidence suggests you just aren't having that much fun either because of poor luck or poor choices. That really doesn't have anything to do with the rest of the population here, no matter how much you try to beat it into the culture.  
   
 You can't even let go of a statement that you literally cannot even disagree with. "We all like what we like". What are you suggesting, by saying that I'm trying to speak for everyone? That some people don't like what they like? That a strangers enjoyment and personal feelings require the great Dr WhatTheFucks approval? That people avoid what they enjoy because in some weird way that makes more sense so you can disagree with me?  
   
 Pfft.  
   
 Even the TER admins have called you out for being a negative nancy. Don't make up questions about my words when you can't even remember your own. Especially when they are clear as day on the same thread ;-)

Are you using the "everything written here is fantasy" excuse for your board posts too?  

All the times you've stated your opinion as fact and insisted that escorts as a whole are terribly incapable beings and flat out said "this is how girls I know are so this is how girls in general are" aren't supposed to lead me to any sorts of conclusions? Other than what you've decided it should be based on what suits you in this thread? THAT'S "thinking for myself"?  

Hooookayyyy, captain.

Trying to learn about providers in a sex ed book. Really? Go hire one fuck her n then ask her. Every lady is different n majority of us love men. Some are already married n some never plan on it anyway.  
Damn when I was in school sex education never talked about hookers lol

I am just going to throw out there that I have been given hundreds more reasons to hate men outside of this, than in it. Anyone who thinks that screwing around with a few of them for hundreds of dollars an hour will do it is looking for a thinly veiled reason to blame women for looking around. That is not a statement saying that I hate men, that is just pointing out a little more reality than most are willing to. Not you, personally (probably), but there are enough men out there not doing us any favors that we certainly don't need to blame johns for it.  

A lot of us weren't terribly interested in marriage to begin with. So, again. Trying to blame women and our choices for something that doesn't really apply, IMO. Hooking and marriage are choices, but they have far less to do with each other than some would like to think.  

I can say that I trust men and their ability/need to be faithful less. But, I didn't trust the whole monogamy thing to begin with. So, which can you really say caused what? The idea that we are supposed to own someone, or seeing that it doesn't work? Which is the chicken and which is the egg in this ever changing system that is the psyche?

Me, personally, I am too lazy to hate an entire group of people. Even if it was just those who are into furry parties, there would still be too many to waste that kind of energy on. I do like to question why and how things matter though :-)

You should introduce yourself...she needs some help here.

I guess you are one of the gals that I tend to hang with.  LOL

Posted By: OhCharlie
I am just going to throw out there that I have been given hundreds more reasons to hate men outside of this, than in it. Anyone who thinks that screwing around with a few of them for hundreds of dollars an hour will do it is looking for a thinly veiled reason to blame women for looking around. That is not a statement saying that I hate men, that is just pointing out a little more reality than most are willing to. Not you, personally (probably), but there are enough men out there not doing us any favors that we certainly don't need to blame johns for it.  
   
 A lot of us weren't terribly interested in marriage to begin with. So, again. Trying to blame women and our choices for something that doesn't really apply, IMO. Hooking and marriage are choices, but they have far less to do with each other than some would like to think.  
   
 I can say that I trust men and their ability/need to be faithful less. But, I didn't trust the whole monogamy thing to begin with. So, which can you really say caused what? The idea that we are supposed to own someone, or seeing that it doesn't work? Which is the chicken and which is the egg in this ever changing system that is the psyche?  
   
 Me, personally, I am too lazy to hate an entire group of people. Even if it was just those who are into furry parties, there would still be too many to waste that kind of energy on. I do like to question why and how things matter though :-)

In the future, try to go with insults that at least borderline apply to something I said. The stupid/broke one in response to this is just lazy.

Thoooouuugh predictable.

Quite presumptuous on your part.

You should also try and link a quote as your post here simply makes no sense.

Must be really slow in your neck of the woods.

Posted By: OhCharlie
In the future, try to go with insults that at least borderline apply to something I said. The stupid/broke one in response to this is just lazy.  
   
 Thoooouuugh predictable.

Ohhhh noooo, CPAAAAA!! You got me again!! :-(  

Stop! I don't think I can handle any more of this wit!!

CubaGoodingJRsMama557 reads

Um, ok. Does he stir the pot, yes he damn sure does. But he couldn't possibly be as bad in person or he'd never get those lunches with his gal pals!

But may I suggest not calling him TSTT while you're attempting to spar with him by talking to him. :-)

Or carry on...

Replying to online posts would be considered "talking to someone" in most circles.

I guess you are not in that circle?

Please try and add a link to support your comments when that comment is not addressing the post.  Tough to keep up with your diatribe when you are just pulling shit out of your ass.

I'll try and post more to you so that you won't feel "left out" in the future.  Sheesh...some of you gals get so jealous.

Posted By: OhCharlie
I would hardly consider this "talking to him" lol  
 

So does anyone have any factual information? I do! I know of several escorts, who after they retired, married, and are living happily ever after. And if that doesn't take the cake, a handful of those, not only married, but married hobbyists. That really blows a hole in that book's theory. One more piece of personal information. I see several ladies who absolutely f*cking love men. Or is it love f*cking men? Whatever! It oozes out of them. That's why I see them. They're so much fun. In fact, if a gentleman doesn't perform adequately for one lady during his escort session, she puts him on the DNS list. Bring your A game baby. She could care less about the money. She wants the man. Now why the hell would these ladies get married to just one man, when they can have them all? Oh, and get paid handsomely for doing so.

the man was open and honest with how he feels about my past experiences (not limited to the hobby)...someone who enjoys me, just the way I am now.  It's a hard order to fill, I"m finding out,  really.  

 It's not that some providers don't wish to ever marry again, it's more a matter of if the guy can get over how many men she's been with, what she did for a living, and does he trust her?  Does he trust himself, or will he compare himself to all of her Johns she's been with, worrying that he'll never live up to other's performances?  

In essence, I'm a one-man woman when I'm committed.  I just haven't met anyone who can get "over" all of this past life stuff.  I was married for 17 years, very committed.  I just married the wrong man, we weren't on the same page with some major issues (besides sex), and it took it's toll on the relationship.   I truly enjoy being in this profession.  But, if I met the right man (don't want to make another error), I'd do it again.

What book was this? A textbook? Were statistics included? Were the statistics obtained from credible sources? If so, they seem very one-sided.  Common sense makes it obvious that not everyone who shares one aspect of their life, such as providing, is the same as each other. Everyone has unique personalities and lives. Yeah we are providers, but we are many other things as well!
the fact that we are providers doesn't mean that we aren't also women and ultimately want what every other women wants. Providers are women too!
Whatever this "book" you mentioned is, it sounds like it is very ignorant, and is all about the age-old and tired stereotype instilled in society, by society (haters and sheep).
either this is a joke, or you should wake up hun.

Posted By: ILoveToFuck
This is a question especially for the providers.  I read from a sex education book that women who retire from this profession almost never end up getting married and end up hating men. Is there any truth to that?  To the providers, please answer this with your absolute honesty.

RokkKrinn787 reads

Several providers whom I see regularly have more or less indicated to me that their experience has taught them that "all men cheat", so they've pretty much ruled out ever getting married.

I think that's kind of unfortunate; I think that providers have enough insight into how to keep a guy interested enough that he would be far less likely to look around for extra action.

Hey, maybe one of these days I'll be lucky enough to test that theory...a guy can dream...

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