My "hobby" match is a passionate, sensual, erotic man that likes to kiss and is happy to be the dominant partner in bed. I'm a pretty sexually traditional woman.. except for you know.. being a bisexual escort lol. I try my very best to market myself to those that fit my sexual proclivities.

I've a had a couple of mismatch experiences recently and they were just no fun for either of us. Two submissives alone in one bed makes for a pretty boring time lol. I didn't know how to take the lead and he didn't want to take the lead.. not good.

I think most of the ladies do a really great job of marketing who they are, GFE, PSE, sub, dom, kinky, vanilla.. whatever. And I think it works most of the time... doms find their subs, kinksters find their playmate, GFE guys find their GFE girl and everyone's happy and satisfied. But sometimes, there's a mismatch and a funny story to go with it I imagine.

So what's your sexual match? Have you ever had a mismatch?

-- Modified on 9/24/2015 8:10:53 AM

I began an online correspondence with a post-op TS, and we really hit it off. She looked great and we had great cyber-chemistry.  
I had never seen a TS before, however.  
Fate allowed us to meet finally but while my mind was willing, my cock was not having any of it.  

I made up an excuse of an upset stomach (It was in LV, after all.), let her keep the donation, and was a sadder Budweiser boy

Hi, Taylor.

We have all had the "mismatch" experience.

By using research and patience, I have had a lot of success with finding friends who I can at least have fun with.  I get into trouble when I venture away from my tried and true criteria.  

Most recently, I decided to visit with one of the legends in the hobby.  Someone who has a great reputation and hundreds of reviews.  She really wasn't my "type", but it was an experience I thought I should try.  It was not a good time.  Frankly, a waste for both of us.

What I have learned is to not take it personally.  The best policy is honesty, politeness, and maybe some humor.  I always honor the agreed upon donation and wish the other person well as I depart on good terms as I look forward to the next great experience

And that isn't simply getting hooked(!) by slick marketing. There is a part of my mind (which I think is culturally conditioned) that tells me I want one thing or that one type of woman is sexually optimum. But it isn't what my body likes. I figured this out by accident one night when one escort couldn't make it and the agency sent another. The second was tall, lean, fair skinned, fine featured and with small natural breasts. Pretty much the opposite of what I went for up to that point. It was a completely different and more satisfying experience. I still experience the split though... Stupid brain.

Interesting and thoughtful question Taylor.

I'm generally the dom, so I tend to look for a more sub partner.  I don't bark out orders or anything but I like an open-minded girl that can follow my lead.  Especially so when I want to role play - it's such a rush to throw an idea out to your partner and have her run with it.  That's fun.

So a submissive partner with an inquisitive, creative mind is a good match for me usually.

Every once in a while I will seek out a domme experience just to mix it up.  So I can play switch but I am almost always the dom.

Yes, I've had a few bad matches along the way.  It usually comes in the form of a lady that has a certain script she wants to run through to rush me out the door.  I'm used to making the suggestions, not the other way around.  Some girls are cool if you tell them you want a certain experience and you're not a "newb", but some have to play the control freak.  Those I don't ever see again.

I had an experience with a very over the top, controlling, bad actress that I remember.  I asked her to tone it down (bad acting isn't flattering, ladies) but she couldn't or wouldn't take a hint.  On her fourth or fifth faked orgasm while we were in mish she yelled in my ear "Oh my God! I'm cumming again! Cum with me this time!!!" and I just started laughing and couldn't stop.  She said what's so funny?

Well against my better judgement I told her the truth (I knew I wasn't ever going to see her again).

I said...
1) you're being very insincere and I asked you to stop but you didn't
2) it's virtually impossible for me to cum with a condom on
and
3) if I was going to cum, you shouting in my ear to do it definitely would've ruined the mood (again - insincere)

She didn't take it well, and I felt bad about that for a long time.  But how is she going to improve if nobody critiques her behavior?  

Now if a real domme worthy of her thigh high leather boots ordered me to cum on command (after a very proper edging session) I would give it serious thought.  But just some girl doing her worst fake O impression that was trying to rush me out the door - not gonna happen.    

I don't believe you've really felt bad about this for a long time. Five minutes, tops and then you only felt bad about booking her in the first place. lol

I completely agree about one thing, if a woman really wants me to cum the last thing she should do is shout it in my ear. All that we get here is about 45 minutes of grudge fucking before I simply get tired and quit without cumming at all.

....and that is NEVER stated in anyone's bio. At least none that I have seen. Very few provider's reference women clients as it is, so expecting to find that would be like looking for a needle in a haystack. What I often do is feel out the providers proclivity to such an arrangement during our initial correspondance and go from there.

My last session ran into just this situation. We both sat there waiting for the other to make the first move. We chuckled about it and then I took charge. I hope to see her again and next time I want her to take the reigns and have her way with me.

I consider my ideal match close to what you prefer - sensual, passionate, erotic, and dominant.  I also find that I can mesh well with a D/s neutral person if there are other reasons that they are attracted to me; those attractions tend to drive their passions, and I find intense passion to be a turn on.

I think no matter how well we market ourselves, we'll always get inquiries from those who are a complete mismatch.  Partly, this is because some guys don't want to read to get to know us, and in other cases, they think everything we write is BS (or both).  The most amazing experiences - for both me and my clients (unless they faked it all!) - have definitely been with those who have taken time to know me.

Fortunately, through screening, my mismatch rate is low. The worst mismatch type for me (so far) is the mechanical guy who wants to complete a set of positions in the time scheduled; it's like you can almost see them going through a checklist! Where is the passion in that? When there has been a mismatch, I imagine that I'm in a submissive scenario to keep me going so I think at least from their end, they didn't realize I considered it a mismatch.  I haven't run into the sub type yet, but I think that could be handled by topping from the bottom (which I think would be way more fun than the mechanical type).

You have the best bullshit detector of anybody I've ever met.
You won't allow a poor guy some poetic license?   :-p

Yeah, I should've said that I was a little bit worried for a short period of time.
That is just until I met the next lady on my list who helped me forget all about it.
Does that ring a little truer?  LOL

Poetic license has a much better ring to it. lol

Yes, thank you.
I am absolutely overflowing with poetic license.

...time of a session well.  But one time, after a very slow start, a provider actually told me she was really submissive and that I would have to take the lead.  She didn't have to ask me twice.

END OF MESSAGE

I'm quite normal ( I think, but don't we all, GaG not included lol) I like lot's of oral with a happy, intelligent, informed, experienced woman with a sense of humor. That of course  is not  very kinky and I wouldn't last more than i session with a dom, teenaged immatateur twit or fucked up weirdo (how's that for opinionated? lol )

Just like my blood type, O I'm versatile and can do either way or in between.

I won't be totally submissive but if she want to drive I don't have problem.

And if she wants me to drive? even better... just don't try to be backseat driver!

If you said you have never seen a TS before chances are 99% it was your mind putting up resistance and de-activated your penis.  

Since she's post-op she should look and feel 100% woman. If you weren't aware beforehand of the fact you'd probably have no problem hitting it.

You "might" have been curious about it but obviously still have huge hangup about the concept.

You can fuggeddaboutit forever or if you're still curious start small. For example see if you can self-service while watching TS porn. When you can successfully do so with both pre- and post-op porn then you're ready for a live fire experience

My match is someone who's smart, fun, funny, dances to her own drummer, all the while being someone who doesn't over think our time together but who will just sit back, relax, and enjoy the flight.  

Someone who doesn't give a thought to whether they need to take the lead or be submissive - someone who just let's it happen.  

Someone who doesn't script their evening but will allow herself to be the person who walked in the room and step out of the persona she wraps herself in for her work.  

Sometimes it happens the first date, sometimes it takes a while, but for me it has happened with everyone I've seen. No mismatches. I've been pretty lucky I guess, and I hope it's true that I'm judged by the company I keep lol.

-- Modified on 9/24/2015 7:26:45 PM

The difference is that by "sexually aggressive" I mean that I love it when a woman takes charge and makes all of the first moves- basically takes charge in bed, initiates the action, tells me what she likes, etc. But not in a dominatrix way. None of that traditional domination stuff like discipline or master/slave stuff. Just a hot provider taking the lead.

My hobby match is much like you Miss Morgan. I love GFE, passionate kissing, and lots of oral play. I like to take charge, but also enjoy it when a lady expresses her desires. Having a lady enjoy sex as much as I do is an absolute must. Of course there are varying degrees of that, from nymphomaniacal to a lady who enjoys her journey to her one orgasm. Yeah, I know, they're all fake.....except when there are tell tale signs.  

But to find a wonderful match a gentleman has to go through a lot of ladies. The fact is, most ladies don't survive first contact. Of the ones who do, most sessions are nice, but something just doesn't quite feel right. Every now and then, you run into a complete mismatch. I've had a few. But there's no way to find the gems, without experiencing the mismatches, no matter how thorough one screens.  

Here are some of my more famous mismatches. When there were a bunch of kids playing in the front yard of her incall, I kept on driving. When I came out of the shower, and there were a bunch of teenagers in the next room, I lost all desire. After the lady escorted me to the back bedroom, and sat on the other side of the room instead of next to me, I wondered why she was a provider. When the lady said, even before we had started, that her boyfriend was a better lover, I sort of lost interest. When the lady said let me get the saran wrap for oral sex, I knew she wasn't going to enjoy it. When I looked into the other room, and saw the lady cleaning her toilet in her lingerie, it quickly killed the mood.

wishes they a stronger thrust when it really got going.

I find gentlemen with a great sense of dry Sinfeld type humor always interests me, one that can make me laugh and engage my brain first will always get my juices flowing. After that, dfk and mutual touch just comes natural. It"s kinda like a magnet of sorts. I think once you find a mental attraction most of the physical should come naturally, at least it does for me. I've been a pro Dom before so when I encounter a shy guy, it's easy to pull his sensuality out by simply reaching in, grabbing the sides of his face and planting one on him. After that they usually open up a bit. Just so what comes naturally.  

My mismatch is as stated before the "checklist er" and the one that has expectations so high that no one can meet them, leaving me struggling to pull rabbits out of my ass, besides that I can pretty much go either way. Although I am not a true "submissive" I do enjoy being somewhat manhandled at times, just letting myself be a play land to explore and enjoy.  

As far as marketing again stated before,, you'll always run into those with whom you don't click but conversation and communication before meeting helps eliminate allot of that. Just be the real you and allow your bubbly personality to shine through. I found you highly attractive, communicative and although a bit shy, (crazy how you perfected both)  very engaging. It made for a perfect you.

You can't ease a guy into liking trannies any more than you can ease a gay guy into being straight.

We like what we like. I would no more try to "convert" a completely hetero guy than I would someone of any other sexual persuasion.

Fish is a freak by his own admission, but apparently he is a totally straight freak. lol

END OF MESSAGE

I almost want to yell out .."aaaand switch" and have a white board above the bed so he can write his list and check them off once he has done them.

-- Modified on 9/25/2015 11:35:34 AM

Gender is much more than body parts.  That's why transgendered people have the problem of having the wrong parts that don't fit their personal chemistry, for want of a better term.

It was my first stab at it, and the sadness of it is that she and I got along famously in cyberspace, but alas, when it comes right down to it, we are living in a material world.

The experience has curbed whatever interest I had in developing any TS or TG sexual relationships