The fact that you were compelled to write this post, you felt "spooked", his behavior has made you "nervous",you wonder if you're being "paranoid" and he "berates" you for not answering his emails in a timely fashion, leads me to beleive it's time for you to move on quickly. That "little voice" is telling you don't see this hobbyists. Listen to it!!
I get spooked and cancel, explaining that his behavior has made me nervous. I state that I think he might be looking for a different type of date then what I provide, I try to be nice. He sends his apologies and tries to reconnect. He states a few other well known providers names and says I can check with them as to his character and wants another chance.
Am I being paranoid here? He apparently is well received with others who's names I do know.
so I book some time with a new client. He seems nice (SEEMS is the key word here). The date is not for weeks out so he starts to email me, every day, several times a day (sometimes up to ten times). I try and answer then I can't due to a busy schedule. I do not get to my email for about 48 hours and he then begins to berate me for not answering, including in his email that he has "found out " who I am and accuses me of being someone I am not.
I get spooked and cancel, explaining that his behavior has made me nervous. I state that I think he might be looking for a different type of date then what I provide, I try to be nice. He sends his apologies and tries to reconnect. He states a few other well known providers names and says I can check with them as to his character and wants another chance.
Am I being paranoid here? He apparently is well received with others who's names I do know.
Before you have even met, best to pass on this one. We're human and not everyone will be a good match. I like your first response about him needing a different type of provider. I'd stick with that. Both parties need to feel comfortable and relaxed about meeting.
I usually suggest 'perhaps in the future'. I've even had a few gents contact me again down the road and the connection was much better the 2nd time. We set up a date and all went well. So you never know...
-- Modified on 12/11/2011 12:11:25 AM
Problems, and you haven't even met him?
IMHO, cut & run, and you owe no explanation to anyone.
The fact that you were compelled to write this post, you felt "spooked", his behavior has made you "nervous",you wonder if you're being "paranoid" and he "berates" you for not answering his emails in a timely fashion, leads me to beleive it's time for you to move on quickly. That "little voice" is telling you don't see this hobbyists. Listen to it!!
I get spooked and cancel, explaining that his behavior has made me nervous. I state that I think he might be looking for a different type of date then what I provide, I try to be nice. He sends his apologies and tries to reconnect. He states a few other well known providers names and says I can check with them as to his character and wants another chance.
Am I being paranoid here? He apparently is well received with others who's names I do know.
No You are not being paranoid . The guy is dangerous .
If you were brunette you would have realized he's
looney when he emailed you more than once a month.
All joking aside,when a guy becomes
obsessed {LIKE HE DID BEFORE HE MET YOU}
terrible things happen sometimes .
When you have a gut feeling someone isn't
safe , don't ever change your mind.
http://www.aolnews.com/2010/02/12/florida-woman-gunned-down-by-stalker-police-say/
I get spooked and cancel, explaining that his behavior has made me nervous. I state that I think he might be looking for a different type of date then what I provide, I try to be nice. He sends his apologies and tries to reconnect. He states a few other well known providers names and says I can check with them as to his character and wants another chance.
Am I being paranoid here? He apparently is well received with others who's names I do know.
of one kind or another. it is neither necessary nor desirable to find out what kind of trouble this might be. it seems as if he is not new or nervous so there is no call for extra care or patience. you didn't have an arrangement to make extra inquiries, you didn't miss any agreed communications like a confirmation email, etc.
it simply doesn't matter that he is OK with folks you know. it's your nerves who are saying "no". i say listen to them and don't look back.
If you're unclear about whether or not forgoing this meeting was the right thing to do, then you're really not equipped to safely handle your appointments.
Stop being so hard on her. What is the atttitude on this board for gods sake. I'ms surprised you don't just tell her to find a rope and hang herself like I've been told
and yet you continue to spout more utter crap as well as hijack a legitimate thread!
As I felt in your OP and conveyed to some "non-believers", I highly doubted you had the ability to read let alone comprehend the advice that was given you on your story.
As GaG says below...get out of this business ASAP. It is NOT for a gal like you. You don't have time on your side, and certainly don't have the requisite emotional (or apparently physical ones either based on your reviews) to succeed here.
Go back to school...earn that GED and find something that you will succeed at.
Seriously, I suspect your are a nice late middle aged woman thinking that you could make a few bucks here. But you are putting yourself, and those few clients you may have at serious risks.
I dare you to meet her and tell this to her face.
The guy is not just a needy, clingy, time waster. He is also a stalker in the making.
Anyone with a bit of sense, (including the OP) should know that she should not walk, but run from this "one restraining order away from a stalker" as fast as she can.
I know who the OP is and have every confidence she will do the right thing, you OTOH should seriously reconsider whether you should be in this business, you don't seem to have the temperment, not to mention the street smarts for this business, and your lackluster reviews prove you really aren't very good at it. BTW Have you ever read your own reviews? They don't tell a very pretty picture.
I don't really mean to be rude, and my "go hang yourself" comment was purely tongue in cheek, but I am not going to sugarcoat anything either. Do yourself (and us) a favor, buy a mirror, read your own reviews, and instead of blaming others, do something to improve yourself, which might include finding another line of work.
I have looked in the mirror and I'm very pretty. I also have a lot of regulars. I have some good reviews and bad reviews. You are an asshole with an attitude. Probably angry that you have to pay. You can look in the mirror as well. and the go hang myself wasn't tongue and cheek. I think you'd enjoy seeing me die
to suggest a woman kill herself, you should be banned from the board
I wrote to TER about you. Inflammatory remarks are not to be tolerated. and I don't care if the suicide remark was tounge in cheek or not. You didn't mention originally that you were joking, which in fact was not funny at all. What if I was indeed suicidal. and my reviews are mixed. Actually guys contact me because of my reviews and my pics are actually lovely.
Tell us about the review that had poop hanging out of your tush i read a prior post where you mentioned it and the bed soaked
He sounds dangerous and may not be mentally stable.
Stay safe
After his psycho moment before. He hadn't even met you and he was calling you names and emailing you up to ten times a day and because he made nice you are thinking of booking him after all! You should reread what you wrote about him and think about this. No way would I see him. How would he behave after seeing you and who cares what anyone else has to say about him that is positive. He was scary stupid with you!!
Other providers may think he's nice because he's not stalking them, but he's already stalking you, RUN away from this guy
I get spooked and cancel, explaining that his behavior has made me nervous. I state that I think he might be looking for a different type of date then what I provide, I try to be nice. He sends his apologies and tries to reconnect. He states a few other well known providers names and says I can check with them as to his character and wants another chance.
Am I being paranoid here? He apparently is well received with others who's names I do know.
I soooooo agree. This is a disaster in the making. I've had my share of guys who get overzealous in emails and I finally tell them that I cannot see them because they have made me uneasy.
Psychologically speaking; since I am one...this is the disturbing behavior that breeds abusive tendencies. Control issues come to mind immediately. Any man or woman who emails you so excessively and then gets an attitude is someone you should automatically fear. It doesn't matter that he has other providers that he has no issues with at the moment. Something about you has set off his controlling nature and paranoia. Don't be his victim.
You're getting a BIG red flag here. Like others have stated run don't walk away from this guy. Block his e-mail and mark him as DNS in your hobby phone. I'm one who doesn't mind exchanging a FEW "get to know you" e-mails before I meet someone. This would cause me not to respond at all. He is exhibiting some abusive behaviors. The hobby world is all about fantasy. This feels too reality. He may be nice to certain girls to get those positive character references. Trust your gut on this one. There is no such thing as being too paranoid. No amount of money is worth your self esteem or physical well being.