...it takes everything that I got to keep it together during breast exams and pap smears

and not even a wiggle during an exam. It's funny, in any other context I'd be imagining her in a hundred different positions but she's a great doc and in a clinical setting I just don't find myself having those thoughts. After I leave, well hell yeah.

The blonde female doctor gave me an uh, groin exam or whatever you call it.  She was, oh, so gentile.  Talking to me during it too.  But it was more like "mmm mmm mmm, spank me big daddy"  God damn.  Well the talk wasn't like that, but it makes the story better.  

I mentioned it to some friends of mine the next day because it was a funny story, and they were like "ha ha haaaaa!!!"  Then every time I turned around that day, some joker dude was saying "ha ha haaa... some chick was checking out 'Mr-Blonde's' balls yesterday"    The girls who were being told that were like "okay then, why are you telling me this?"

Needless to say, the word got out that (a) my doctor was some kind of chick and (b) I had a clean bill of health.

A man goes to the urologist for an exam.  In walks a gorgeous, sexy, female doctor who tells him to drop his pants.  He does and she studies him and says, "Well, first off, you need to quit masturbating."
The man ask, "why?"
The doctor replies, "Because, I'm trying to examine you"