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Ladies, I need your help with my marketing.
JackDunphy 1015 reads
posted

Ladies, thinking about adding the "JDE" to my offerings.

For $1500*, the "Jack Dunphy Experience" can be yours.  

It includes:

*Two full hours of alone time with yours truly
*anything at all you want to eat (off the "dollar menu and more")
*an almost unopened bottle of strawberry Boone's Farm
*free membership to Ashley Madison
*a free box of Godiva's
*day old bread
*a newly washed pair of panties with the word "Skyler" written on the butt
*a chocolate chip mint green pair of "F" me pumps (while supplies last)
*photo board tips to actually make you look hot
*a candle with Mr. Fishers finger prints  
*an open and frank discussion on whether or not your too old to be hooking

 
If you act right now, I will throw in my book, now out in paperback:

"How to Deal with TER Board Assholes, Dicks and Time Wasters: whose negotitations should you shit can and whose should you accept." ;)

*not available in Hawaii, Alaska, and any state that borders on West Virginia.
**OTC starts @ $500 hour. (No boundary pushing please.)

Thoughts?

jelloman42237 reads

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balljointnut277 reads

When we are done do we get a ribbon that says I participated in the JackDunMeExperience? Are those washed panties tighty whites? Has that candle with Fishers fingerprints on it been in his ass or yours? I bought your book "How to Negotiate with Hookers" and all I took away from it was that if you have a penis half the size of a normal man you should whip it out and demand half price because your only half the man they were expecting. Can you clarify?

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JackDunphy270 reads

Paging TS Sasha.

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balljointnut262 reads

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JackDunphy227 reads

It's what's inside them that will fk with your mind.

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nothrofboston232 reads

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JackDunphy247 reads

Your economy with the English language is only outdone by your amazing interpersonal skills.

Conan will be in touch.

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nothrofboston209 reads

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Afro-desiac230 reads

But is there is discount version?  I mean, I'm 23.  No interest in AM.  Pass on the fast food.  Who's mrfisher?
I'll take the panties for $5.  The Boone's Farm for $3.  Day old bread $2. Godivas?  I'll pass.  Nowhere near the best in fine chocolates.  Baby girl is already the finest chocolate. And what's up with "F me pumps?" Where are we?  Is this a fucking fuck board or not?  Can't you just write fuck?  I'll take the Fuck Me Pumps for $15. Cuz I like green.
I'll take the two hours because I'm sure you'll have me laughing my fine ass off.
For that, I will happily pay you $25.


-- Modified on 1/6/2016 11:23:36 PM

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JackDunphy238 reads

I do require a $1000 deposit. Will that be Amex, MC or bit coins?

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Afro-desiac229 reads

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JackDunphy244 reads

I have two sales already! Yip fkin heeeeee!

One for the whole truck load of $1500 ( but I have to spoon with Sash) and another for $25.

I am saving up to see Alexandra Hill so do what you can!

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nothrofboston205 reads

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BigPapasan209 reads

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JackDunphy227 reads

No! FUCK no!!!!

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ilarasantos206 reads

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JackDunphy207 reads

Based on orders so far, I will need another six dozen.

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octavia.lexa220 reads

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Fancy8888235 reads

Crack me up.. Have a good day :)

Posted By: octavia.lexa
Related Link: http://www.preferred411.com/P136493

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Squeezetheorem241 reads

I'm interested, but need to know your cancellation policy. I'm a very reliable person who most certainly never double books and bails on someone or gets cold feet, but I like to know I won't be fined in the event of an alien abduction.  

Wishlist? I want to spoil you with gifts and a bedside interrogation as to how you got into this, but you offer no specified items and retailers for guidance.  Shall we assume a Snuggie paired with Bartles & Jaymes will set the mood?

No pics? Very shady....Do you have a hatchet wound or something? Or are you perhaps younger than you're letting on and know some of us like older peeps? If it's the latter, it was very slick of you to pepper your convos with  tidbits, such as which Facts of Life girl gave you wood. Answer fast: where were you during Hands Across America?

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mrfisher222 reads

leave them under the cushions of the first sofa on the left, the one with the pee stain on it.

No questions asked

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JoeAFriday180 reads

I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a JDE today ?

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