1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is, buddy, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is??
2. People in the supermarket check out line who wait until their entire bill is rung up before they begin writing their check. Hello...is the store name going to change, or the date, or your signature before the clerk finishes? Get a clue!
3. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the damn TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change it manually!
4. When people say..."Oh, you just want to have your cake and eat it, too." Screw that!!! What good is a damn piece of cake if you can't eat it? What should I do... eat someone else's piece of cake instead??
5. When people say..."It's always the last place you look." No shit!! Why the hell would you keep looking for it after you've already found it?? Do people do this?? Who and where are they??
6. When people say, while watching a movie ... Did you see that?" No, dumb ass, I paid $7.50 to come to a theater and stare at the ceiling up there. What did you come here for??
7. People who ask, "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?
8. When something is "New & Improved," Which is it? If it's new, there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement then there must have been something before it!
9. When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going. "You should know, asshole. You're the one that pulled me over!"
10. All of these twits on the road who think they know how to drive. Don't they know that when you merge in traffic, you should ALREADY be going the damn speed limit?
Here's the 11th thing that really bugs me....
11. Chain letters! Who the hell thinks that by annoying other people with stupid mail with no meaning, that they will grant you a wish, or make your long-lost love fall into your arms. Bullshit! I'm so sure that by breaking stupid chain letter that the computer gods are going to curse me!! What a crock of shit!!!
By the way, if you send this to 10 people, shit won't happen, and that person you're in love with won't come crawling to you...so if you feel this is funny, go on and send it to some one else, but don't expect one damn thing in return!
Does the entire 60 Minute crowd hobby? Whadda bout Mike Wallace? Ya know, I see him more as wanting to give it to someone up the ass versus a true hobbyist. Whadda you think?
I ever hope to stand up to your incredible wit and insight? It is just that I can laugh at myself, and I don't get pissed off at some anonymous figure who is having a little fun. Sorry I offended you sonny. When you grow up, you will understand. Until then, be kind to the ladies, they deserve it.
Admiration -- A needed poke in the eye, a little fun, walking against the crowd, taking a stand, going for the green.
Consternation -- That cop in the morning waiting just inside the freeway on-ramp to give you a ticket for turning on a red light between 7-9 a.m. For Pete's sake, time the damn lights.Only 3-5 cars going my way catch the green light, while 20 Joes going the other way have nothing but clear sailing.
1. Guys who post ISO type messages without any indication if they've tried looking for themselves. All too often it appears they haven't. I won't contribute any info I might have unless they guy gives some indication he's not simply too lazy to make an effort himself.
2. Posters who play the "Last Word" game in threads. Educated people usually, but who are either ego-driven or else don't have the common sense to realize when the horse is dead. Redundancy is a common side-effect.
have to live with him every day. PS: Love people who don't get the joke. This is the LAST WORD (see Greywolf's post... I hate having to explain them when they are SO obvious).
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