Alright, I know some of the ladies tour. Maybe not necessarily 'tour' as far as the hobby is concerned, but do infact travel for whatever reason and figure, 'Hey. Might as well take appointments while I'm there'.

For instance, a lady I see here in NM is going to NY the middle of June to do some modeling.

Hot lady. Fantastic fucking lover. As a matter of fact, turned on some guys that are around that area and I know of at least one that took me up on my recommendation and made a date with her.

But I guess what my question is, short of actually posting on a regional board that a lady is infact going to roll thru an area, would it be out of line if a lady sent a PM or such telling a guy she'll be there and would like to meet him?

Maybe because she likes his ass from his posts/reviews?

I wouldn't mind getting a PM from a lady telling me she's rolling thru my town, wanting to see my fucking ass.

Am I alone in this?

Actually, I'm not, because I know of a guy who gets PMs from ladies that are going thru his city and he gets laid left and right. Just sayin'.

Ladies and gents? Care to comment?

Hell yea I love the touring Heads-Up!  I got one this week and made plans..  nice to have the info before it becomes general knowledge.. *smile*

I've always viewed PM's on review boards differently than a phone call, text, or email, in that I think it is perfectly acceptable for a provider to initiate contact (for whatever reason) throught the board's messageing system. I would welcome a PM.

I have asked gals who tour to let me know when / if they come to SF area.

And I've been contacted by a TER friend to tell me "see so and so when she comes to SF."

I have tipped off a couple people also.  One friend in LA area (who has disappeared on me) and we shared details.

However I never send a lady my picture in advance...I don't want her cancelling the entire trip and needing therapy!

and saying they want to see them.

If the lady isn't to the client's liking, or if he doesn't happen to have the funds or whatever, she is putting him on the spot.

She is essentially asking him, please be my customer.  

What I think is a better idea is for a lady to put on her website that she travels to certain areas, and if clients in that area wish to be notified when she is sign up for a mailing list for that specific area.

I know of a few ladies that have that model, and it allows them to let interested clients know where they will be and when without putting that client on the spot to have to tell her yes or no.

Brother! We met. You're not like that. As a matter of fact, you're tall, handsome and quite fun to be around!  

I can say that because I'm secure in my masculinity.

What bothers me is the next time we get together, how much havoc we would reap on the poor ladies that would be foolish enough to meet with us!

But then again, your charm, our looks, and the envelopes might sway them in our direction! LOL!!!

I'm rolling through NM on a layover later this week, so..can I send a pm to ya??

xoxo
Ashley Jade

But in the same respect, I think it's flattering and does something to a guy's ego when a lady says she's coming to town and would like to see him specifically.

Am I wrong?

Ash, we've talked. And NOW you want to meet? Really?!!!

Not shitting you...

Yes!!! Please?!!! I would VERY much love to meet with you!

We talked about me going to Vegas, and now THIS?!

Oh yeah! Please! Let's discuss this further in PM!!!

I think it's real easy to forget sometimes, when we're getting GFE, that this is pay-for-play.

This doesn't mean get cynical and twisted out of shape (which happens way too much, IMO- this is where a lot of the misogyny in this business comes from), but look- these ladies are a) smart, b) in customer service (literally servicing the customers) AND sales, which means, c) take it for what it is: the attraction isn't just to you and your ruggedly handsome looks and charming manner, it's to what is in your wallet.

This is a fee for a service: pay the fee, enjoy the service, but realize that being enticed and being flattered is part of the whole deal.

-- Modified on 5/31/2010 11:02:40 PM

Most of the ladies in my circle will contact me when they are available, or to just say hello, which is code for saying the same thing.  This is a good place to be as a hobbyist...  

As for ladies I have never seen, it's on me to make first contact, and get the ball rolling.  I've never had a lady I didn't know contact me seeking an appointment, and I would be cautious if that ever happened.

I think it's tacky to contact random guys to let them know they are in town, going to be in town, are running a special or anything else unless it's simply a hello, how are you.

IMO, if a gentleman wanted to see ME, HE would contact ME.  Me contacting him, that looks desperate, or like she is spamming.  Neither are good and most of the time it would seem men wouldn't like that.

Now if I was traveling to an area where I knew say client A and B would be.  Whom I have previously sessioned with a couple plus times, then I might be inclined to PM him.  Or if I had a gentleman who asked me to let him know when I'd be in town.

Other than that, tacky.  Make a post or buy an ad on Eros or something.  Just my 2 cents.

If a provider is coming to my town and I have an interest in seeing her, I will make first contact.
I have received PM's and emails out of the blue and I rarely follow up on them.
I may make exceptions for providers that I have seen before.

Providers also need to be aware that spamming is NOT allowed on TER. Providers who may start thinking about doing this should consider that there may be consequences to their actions. Sending a single PM is one thing. Creating a list of hobbyists in a city and spamming them all prior to a visit may just bite you in the ass. You have the regional boards announce your availability.

it has never happened to me, so I don't know how I would feel...

but, I think I would just figure she heard I was a good client, which there is nothing wrong with, but I wouldn't be flattered by that, just like I wouldn't be flattered if my dentist said I was good patient.  It is a compliment, but falls into the category of any compliment from a stranger basically saying I am polite or respectful.  

I wouldn't take it to mean I am attractive, or good at anything that may happen during the session, just that my parents raised me to follow instructions and say please and thank you, and such....I would still know I am ugly and unskilled and that said woman wouldn't be contacting me if there were no envelope.

Actually, on further consideration I would probably worry that she had heard I was an easy mark or the like and she figured she would hit me up as I probably wouldn't say "no" or would have a hard time saying "no" or whatever, so I was sure money...but then again I have self-esteem issues so take what i would think for what it's worth.

On ever further consideration, it did almost happen once.  A woman from another site was coming to Vegas and indicated she wanted to meet me, I hemmed and hawed a bit as she wasn't really my "type" (she was pretty and seemed nice enough, there was just something about her that didn't do it for me) she assured me that she just liked my posts and just wanted to meet for a drink when she wasn't working, and was not looking for an appointment. I figured no harm in a drink, even if she didn't make my nether-bits twitch she did seem nice enough.

I gave her my number to call when she got into town so we could arrange meeting for a drink.
When she called she reiterated no session, just wanted to meet, but added that if something happened and I wanted a session she would be OK with that.  I told her that the economy had kicked my ass, and I didn't have the money for an appointment (which was true, if not really the sole reason I wouldn't session with her) and she immediately had to get off the phone but would call me back later...
which never happened...
so, she saw me as a donation, I was an attempt to finagle an appointment...
my reaction was not feeling flattered.
My reaction was more of insulted that she tried to play me like that, and thought I was some rube that would get a drink in me and then she could just get a donation out of me.

I'd fully expect you to let me know if you were coming to town. Matter of fact, you BETTER!

I do not like being solicited especially out of the blue by someone I have never seen before. No doubt, I have seen other traveling ladies that I made it known to them when they returned to my town to let me know. They did... and I did. lol

Just a week ago, I had a solicitation via PM here on TER from a visiting lady (out of the blue). Since I was high profile hobbyist in my area, she thought it would be nice to see me and get a review since she is "going to be regular" to my city.

As Webbie has said, this put me on the spot. And, I had to inform her that I had no hobby money right now due to other monetary commitments. Honestly, she was not my type anyway, even though the money WAS tight. So, she writes me back and tells me if I round up some local friends to see her she would gladly give me a "freebie". I did not respond to her after receiving that PM. Another lady who posts on our local board and here knows who I am talking about.

Ironically, I get another PM but this time it is from some dude who claims to be one of her ATF's looking for information about Vegas and such.

A day later I find out by searching for her profile again to do some looking into his lady that TER had banned her. Obviously, I do not know the reasons for her bannishment, and frankly do not care, she is gone.

There is no doubt that had I rounded up some friends and/or seen her myself, I would have perhaps gotten caught up in some sort of BS, not to mention those friends would be no longer either.

In summary and for a moral to the story, be careful out there especially as it relates to PM's received by an unknown commodity to YOU. This lady had a whole bunch of good reviews, but obviously she was working on the darkside of something. BEWARE.

when they PM me and say they want to see me, they usually throw in some type incentive...Like 3 hrs for 2. etc.
Other than that, I don't care much for unsolicited PM's, or spam.  

"Hey, I'm coming to your town and would love to see you AND take your money"
Unfortunately, many see the "i'd love to see you", get all flattered, and forget it's about the money!

Hell with that, If they are sending me unsolicited mail, there better be "coupons" attached!!!!  LMAO

I sure wouldn’t post for her (not that you said you would) but I see no problem in what you did, telling certain guys you have a connection to that she is coming.  I also see no problem with her PMing/e-mailing a few she has exchanged banter with on the boards even if they have not met.  One PM.  He’ll respond if interested.

I don’t understand the “If she sends me a PM I’ll never see her” attitude.  It’s a business.  Businesses send out fliers and ads.  We all know where the delete key is.  If it was e-mail or a text instead ov via this account, that would be different in my mind.

I'd have the same issue with the play, claiming a drink when she was after the session.  That is different in my mind from the PM initially.

I've gotten a number of PMs by traveling providers telling me they're coming through.  About half also ask if I want to meet them for a session.  I have had no problem writing back a short note saying "No thanks."

many of us have a harder time saying "no".

It is as if we think we have to have a reason or explanation for telling people "no".

That we somehow have to apologise for saying "no".


**Note the above is a generality, and is not intended as a statement about any specific, individual woman (other than myself) or all women.

I've received several PM's, but only when I've communicated an interest in seeing them.

There are a couple of ladies that I have specifically asked to keep me informed when they will be in the area, with as much advanced notice as possible.

Either I can see them, or I can't.

But there's certainly nothing wrong with them letting me know.

If I can't see them due to prior scheduling or something, it isn't like they are a girl madly in love with me being rejected or something. It's just business, and there is nothing wrong with throwing out a baited hook to see if I bite. Hell, I ASKED them to drop the hook!

Not even if I say "vi mazt kill all skverrel and muz"?

xoxo

Lina

Sounds nice to me to give some guys a heads up as long as it's not more than once IMO. Well yeah just let them know since you feel she's so great you just had to let them know...I don't think most would see it as spam.

very nice PM interaction

other night.....by hand.

Got to agree with your entire post boneboy.