I think most men that I've known and talked to either in person or on these type of boards feel the same way. That providers who voluntarily tell us about their kid/kids may not realize how this shatters the "fantasy" or just lessens the experience for (some) men.

I'm not against kids or anything, but knowing that I'm having really hot nasty sex (or even a sweet GFE sex) with a mother of a child and that this child has a father somewhere (God knows where!) is just not why I am into the hobby. Guys, am I alone in this? I don't think so.

My .02

Pro, I am OK with a mention of kids as long as they aren't in the next room. LOL But, I had a provider who brought up her husband three or four times in a three hour session. And no it wasn't because she was unsure or worried, she just kept mentioning that he was at home. That was kinda wierd in my book.

Disagree.  Providers are trying to build repor with you.  To me the more you know about the provider it makes for a better experience.  Information is shared in confidentiality.  After all, wouldn't you want to know a little about the woman you are going to have sex with?  It is not about slam bam thank you, be a little more passionate then that.

90% of my clients ASK me if I have children and I don't lie about having one.  Perhaps its just a part of getting to know more than just the steamy side of me.  I'm also asked whether I have a boyfriend, husband, and many other things as well.  It's just conversation between cups and it's never stopped a client from getting it on with an attractive lady in the mood for a great time! lol

You may enjoy the fantasy of hot sex but whats wrong with hot steamy sex with a mother versus a childless woman?  Nothing in my opinion.  

Tammie

I think most people have kids.  If a provider tells me they have kids I think it is great.  One more thing we have in common.

I'm sure your not alone in your way of thinking but lets just say I'm on that other percentage.  I myself like to establish some kind of friendship with the lady I'm about to bed.  For me this includes whatever the lady needs or wants to talk about is cool with me just as long as its nothing gross like scat play, yahhhhhhhhhhhh, ewwwwwww.  
I just don't want to get into a session where both of us have to fantasize and lie about our lives before we have sex.  Uh Oh the s word, dohhhhhhh.  Thats why I like to talk and find out more about the provider i'm gonna see so it doesn't get to awkward for me, cause their the professional and i surely am not.
Oh well just yacking away here. Everyone have a great weekend and stay safe.  Happy Fathers day to all you dads out there and i don't mean you sugar daddies, lol.  Okay you guys to then.

                            Buh Bye,

                            jammers

I've never been asked if I have children and I'm very rarely asked if I have an SO.  I don't have any children to talk to clients about but I did find myself raving at quite some length yesterday about my gorgeous ginger cat whom I'm not seen in many weeks.  I guess that's my version of the children conversation!

To become more comfortable with a new provider, I ask questions so I can get to know them better. BUT,  the more I find about their personal life (which often contains plenty-o-baggage) the more it ruins my fantasy... and makes me want to seek a new provider where the fantasy is fresh again.

Hearing about their divorce, kids, etc., takes the wood right outta my pencil.

I guess that’s one of the reason’s why I like AMP’s - I can’t understand them well enough to ruin the fantasy.

No kids, but I will show you pics of my 2 cats eom

eom

about my kids, but did, below thread.
Were you talking about posting on the board, or while you are having a date?
During a date, I usually only mention whatever's already been asked..

Sedona

Married clients tend to ask me (at the end of the date) if I have kids, and of course I don't lie...but I certainly don't bring up the subject voluntarily because I don't want to ruin the "fantasy".

Single clients ask me if I am married or have a serious boyfriend (I think their way of checking on my availability in the real world, which of course I take as a compliment.)

One thing I've noticed--married escorts of my acquaintance tend to lie to clients about their marital status (they come clean on the kids issue, though--hard to disguise that C-section scar, LOL).

I'm just glad I'm single (divorced) and don't have to worry about the marital status question--could be tricky for some.

If you're only interested in fantasy, buy a PlayStation.

Personally, I don't like "phoney" and enjoy being with real people and learning something about them.

I’ll frequently ask providers about kids, and lots of times this has been a nice bonding—sharing experiences, problems, advice, satisfactions about her kids and mine.  After a few dates I’ll ask about her life situation—marriage, boyfriend, school, other work past or present; because I’m interested, and if I’m there for the fourth time, I like her.

After a few dates with somebody who likes them, and who isn’t a jerk, I think providers enjoy talking about their lives, and even hearing something of mine.  Emotional, social and intellectual intimacy is fun and is easy to approach with providers, since we start on such an intimate plane when it comes to the physical aspects of our bodies.

So, if you want to tell me about your kids; I’m all ears; although I do get distracted for awhile by bare breasts and beautiful pussy.

If I'm dumb enough to ask I wish they would lie about the serious boyfriend or husband.  Not long ago I found a really neat lady that I wanted to see over and over. We always did a lot of deep conversation even on the first date, but on the fourth or fifth date in as many weeks she mentioned she had moved in with another client, and the fantasy was dead.  I have never seen her again. Maybe I'm shallow but it just killed the thrill for me.

Phx69

-- Modified on 6/14/2003 5:54:54 PM

A truly maternal girl isn't a turn off to me, even an encounter with someone  in "a family way" was one of the best I've had.

Look for ladies that are non-GFE, who do not what to know anything about you, just like you do want know their personal lives. Just do it and leave. Very simple. Can you see where all this GFE stuff can be confusing for both provider and client? You want to kiss, have bbbjtc, greek, multiple times but don't want to know the woman? She is giveing you more than just her body, you want a girlfriend for an hour. Girlfriends talk alot.

..and I encourage anyone, including providers, to talk about theirs.  It's just part of a natural converstaion between adults.

Beyond the "fantasy" element of it there is the "fact" that women who have experienced childbirth are often "loose" down there. I mean let's not kid ourselves for the stupid sake of being PC on this board (of all boards!) This is why most men who are thinking purely about sex (please understand the distinction I am trying to make ... PURELY ABOUT THE SEX) may be turned off by that reality or just the mere thought of it. I shouldn't have to say this, but I too am not against kids or women and I'm also not an age-chauvinist who thinks women who've had childbrith should never again be considered or considere themselves as being sexy. I am just trying to express a thought (yes under an alias, of course) without the fear of being flamed for doing it.

women who have had four c-sections are ok since nothing larger than a penis has entered their vagina?

What about kegels? Personally, I think they help a lot.

I like to get to know the women at a much better level than simply sex.  Some women I have seen I have continued to discuss things we talked about in the session long after the session has ended via email, etc.  Since I like to get to know someone (knowing more about someone usually results in better relationships), I love to know everything about the person that she will reveal.

If that is kids, ex-husbands, problems she is having, etc.  I am more than willing to listen and even give any advice I can.

For me, the "encounter" is much more than about sex.  You cannot forget the "mind-*uck" aspect of the time together.  The more you know about each other, the better the "mind-*uck"

Perhaps it is because I am over 40 years old, and the typical georgous women that most men want does almost nothing for me.

the gals with c-section scars.

"Don't worry, baby.  I'm still as tight as a seventeen-year-old!"

this is something I don't get either its TMI!!! (too much info)

This is not a situationwhere we are supposed to e mate shopping!

We are selling a fantasy nothing like a cold tacky dose of reality do slap you up side the head and make you realize that this is why you pay for a date so you don't have to listen to their personal emotional life stories, good or bad.

you can meet those women in a bar, and you don't have to pay for it but all the baggage that comes along with them hardly makes it seem a bargain

Once on one of these boards a Las Vegas provider started a thread with a "cute" story of what one of her kids had done or said.

She got some negative feedback from some of the guys who: 1) didn't know she had kids and it spoiled the fantasy of her being young and available; 2) they felt awkward having a post about kids right in the middle of adult discussions about sex.

I have to agree--keep all kid and husband/SO stories off these boards. Email them to your friends instead.

Believe me, no one wants to hear to hear "cute" toilet training stories on TER.  

End Of Message

-- Modified on 6/16/2003 12:43:47 AM

I don't mind hearing about a provider's children at all.

These people are WOMEN.  They are build to love children.  If they did not, the human race would have died out long ago.  

I would rather be with a woman than with a fantasy.

I have had one child and I have had clients openly tell me that my vagina is considerably "tighter" than some women who have not had children.  I don't know what mothers you have had sex with, but any woman who truly is into the pleasures of sex will remember to do her kegel exercises and will have the ability to "grip" even the smallest umm...members.  

I don't mind clients asking if I have children.  I think it shows that they actually think past me being a sex object or "fantasy" that exists purely for their satisfaction.

they were as tight as you'd want.  

Perhaps the non-fathers on the board are unaware that most vaginal deliveries these days include an appeasiotomy (spell?), which is a small incision made to avoid vaginal tearing.  After the delivery, the doc usually stitches up the muscle to be as tight or tighter than before.  My ex-wife was so tight after delivering our 10 1/2 lb. son with the huge head, that I could hardly enter her.

I've found body type to be just as important as whether a woman has had a baby.  Some women just have a soft and fleshy body type with little tone.  I've found this type to frequently be a looser fit than a more firm and muscular type.  But I'm sure kegels can help that condition also.

So guys, it's not 1920 anymore.  Just because someone is a mother does't mean she can't be tight.