TER General Board

just one question
Tango-Golf 6 Reviews 6573 reads
posted
1 / 30

Being more a lurker than a reviewer/hobbyist, the discussion below on the SP's race was quite fascinating.  I have a question for the providers: are there any specific ethnicities of men you avoid or prefer?  And why?  A similar question question for the hobbyists: have you ever noticed a significant change in enthusiasm specifically related to your race when you showed up?

dviantboy 75 Reviews 3744 reads
posted
2 / 30

I've seen ads in the past (although, I can think of one current one) in which providers indicated that there were only certain races they would see.  Never saw my own (ok, I'm as white as they come) so I was never excluded.  But it made me less interested in those providers knowing their prejudices were showing through like that.

DVB

Taylor Maiden See my TER Reviews 4299 reads
posted
3 / 30

I was just having this discussion with a few ladies from here. I was trying to figure out why they wouldn’t see black or East Indian men. They said the men of other races  couldn’t help but try to negotiate. They never want to stick to the contribution posted and “They haggle like they are buying a dress,” I was told.

I have heard that there are hygiene problems with some races and black men, "want their money's worth". The ladies I spoke to said that no matter what you tell a black man you won’t do he will force you till he gets it (yikes). Some ladies have had problems with certain races so they avoid them.

As far as myself, if the person seeing me is polite and clean I have no problem seeing anyone. Then again I am black so I would feel absolutely retarded if I was to deny one race over the other.

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 3506 reads
posted
4 / 30

"Then again I am black so I would feel absolutely retarded if I was to deny one race over the other."

Believe it or not, some African American Providers WILL NOT see Black men, including one of the most well known ladies. Of course, this was the same woman who indicated that it shouldn't matter to a client whether or not he received a CBJ or a BBBJ, because they were the same (as though she has received either in her life...then again...maybe she has in a past life...who is to say?)

Insofar as the other comments, I am certain these same characteristics can be attributed to men of ALL races, but it is easy to find logic in ones own prejudices. Funny, we (African Americans) are constantly accused of pulling out the "race card", of jumping to conclusions, and being "hyper sensitive", but when wide sweeping judggements are made AGAINST us without validity, this are endorsed as "choice". Or, in other words, when Sable reads something and perceives it as being prejudiced, she is accused of being "miltant" and of "having a chip on her shoulder" (or whatever was said below), but when someone gives such ignorant reasons for not seeing Black clients, their POV is respected because it is based on their "experience"...as though Sable's experience in life doesn't count toward shaping HER perceptions.

Its all BS, really. At least "dviantboy" above realizes that the POV of most white people is indeed a luxury of being white, and he recognized that the world might not quite be the same for other people.

Now if we could only get others to respect the experiences and POV of those who have actually LIVED with prejudice, versus judging them, the world will be that much closer to a becoming a truly happy place...

MoveOn 3933 reads
posted
5 / 30

why is it frowned upon when the ladies have preferences when choosing a client? Am I racist because I choose not to have sex with a black man? Not anymore so then the gentleman who chooses not to have sex with black women and only seeks out white providers.

-- Modified on 10/24/2002 3:49:41 PM

alphared 5323 reads
posted
6 / 30

I have to admit when i can tell that they are of arabic descent i get pretty nervous. I tend to attract them as well as east indian men and if they are polite when booking i do see them.

I have to admit though there has been many times when I did when I absolutely could not believe some of the things that came out of their mouths. One made a rather rude comment about my son watching us have sex WTF? and they often want to tell me how I should conduct business and seem to patronize me more than other clients. One guy said "you know you're pretty intelligent" not once but at least ten times throughout the evening.

I guess I find them lacking as I have rarely had an arabic client engage me in any kind of truly meaningful conversation, yes I know that that is not what they are there for but most of my other clients and the ones I like best do enjoy the company of an intelligent women. As far as black men go I don't have that many that have tried to book with me but the ones that have usually don't work out for different reasons. The most common being that they have broken the rules about what I will not talk about and that is an automatic no see in my book.

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 4612 reads
posted
8 / 30

Actually, it wasn't your post that struck me...it was one that I can't seem to locate now, but went on to talk about how the poster had read otehr posts from Sable, and thought she was bitter, etc....

Really, this whole things pisses me off so much, but I guess I should be used to it by now...

MoveOn 4595 reads
posted
9 / 30

Body to body contact, shaking someone's hand, small talk and then getting it on to car mechanics??Physical and sexual preferences Is what this is about.
 I dont call guys racist because they choose to spend time and money with Asian/Black or Latina providers over a whitebread girl like myself. Im not name calling or boo-fucking-hooing in the corner because Im not what they prefer.
 

-- Modified on 10/24/2002 6:27:55 PM

-- Modified on 10/24/2002 6:36:48 PM

TruthSpeaker 3410 reads
posted
10 / 30

prejudices, they tend to accept it as proof that their prejudices are correct, but when they see behavior by a member the group in question which does not confirm their prejudices, they write it off as the "exception to the rule".

The question "Am I a racist?" is a simple one to answer:  Am I failing to see someone as a individual and assuming things about him/her because of the color of their skin, their national origin, their religion?  Prejudice means "pre-judging".  Let's start seeing each as individuals instead.



MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 3953 reads
posted
11 / 30

I can compare it because in my mind it quit being "intimate" (on a personal level, versus physical) when you decided to make a business out of it, and to start accepting money.

You don't have "intimate" relationships with your clients. You have sex with them. Some regulars, no doubt....but also at least SOME total strangers. And even the regulars you presumably don't see much of outside of the bedroom.

You don't call guys "racist" when they elect to not spend time with you because you aren't injured. So long as you have business, what do you care?

But, if suddenly the MAJORITY of your clients were to feel that way, I bet you'd (or at least other ladies) would be posting about it, expressing your dismay, just as BBW providers have posted regarding the same sort of frustrations (why do guys prefer smaller women? is that fair? I am just as good...).

If the mechanic analogy doesn't work for you, try this one...a masseuse. Receiving a full body non sexual massage is about as "intimate" an act as there can be without intercourse...hell, it is even SOLD as a service (with release) right? So...what if you were to show up at your favorite spa, lie down for treatment, and then have your masseuse say to you "I'm sorry, you aren't my phyisical 'preference'...I chose not to service you because you are white".

And again, if you are going to cite some "emotional connection" seperating the two activities, I will again state that you don't know many of your clients well enough to have a true "emotional connection" and besides, emotions went out the window when you decided to start accepting money for sex. If you still are emtionally engaged with your clients when you service them, well, you might be one of those women that many other ladies here have posted have no business being in THIS business.

BTW...the definition of racist is someone who makes decisions about people based on race. Don't think for a second because you don't burn crosses and wear a sheet (I presume you don't) that you aren't racist. You have decided to not see African American men simply because they are African American men. You have made a decision based on race. That makes you a racist. Just because you don't like the facts, don't dismiss it as "name calling". Nobody...even KKK members...likes to be called "racist". That doesn't stop it from being true.

-- Modified on 10/25/2002 4:58:13 AM

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 4091 reads
posted
12 / 30

There are, no question. The problem is assuming that those differences WILL occur in your encounters with someone of a different cultural background.

I don't assume every white person I encounter is a violent racist, or is even racist at all (beyond the minor prejudices we all have, including myself, based on our innocent ignorances of others). Yet, I know for a fact that racism exists...I have experienced it.

I just think we are called to treat other people with a fair and even hand...with dignity and respect...until they give us reason not to. A providers job is to make sure her clients are safe, clean, and respectful, and of course able and willing to pay her fee. She has a number of means for confirming this...screening conversations, references, etc. None of them are absolutes (that is the risk of doing business), but when carried out diligently and with care, they ARE more accurate than simply prejudging people by race.

I still maintain, as I did months ago when I came to this board prompted by this very topic, that a white provider who thinks she is ensuring her safety by not seeing African American (or other men of color) is actually more at risk, because she is much more likely to have poor screening procedures, thinking that most white guys are "safe". If I were a white sexual deivant looking to cause harm, I'd seek out such providers, because clearly they wouldn't "see me coming".

I said before, and I will say again...I DEFY anyone to prove to me that more crimes against providers were committed by Afrian Americans versus white hobbyists. Insofar as any other reason for electing to not see minority clients, well, again, as I posted above, nobody LIKES the label "racist", but that doesn't change the fact whatsoever. If you make a decision about a person based on their race, then you are racist.

-- Modified on 10/25/2002 7:25:41 AM

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 4142 reads
posted
13 / 30

So...to actually answer your question...."have you ever noticed a significant change in enthusiasm specifically related to your race when you showed up?", I'd have to say:

A) How would I ever know? I don't have a white aler ego to make a comparison vist, and,

B) If compelled to answer, my answer would be "no".

Without question I have had providers arrive at my door who were seemed surprised to learn I was an African American. It was written on their faces as plain as day. However, I've always simply attributed this to "innocent ignorance"...they just were not able to discern from our conversation (if it was an independent who screens) that I was an African American, and I would also guess in the case of both Independents and Agency gals, they were surprised to find a Black Man living in my building, in my part of town.

However, I absolutely must make clear that I have had nothing but good to GREAT times with providers. If there was any "issue" as you ask, I sure couldn't tell. Typically, providers have flattered me (yes, I realize that is their job, but still, they don't have to) on my looks, my graciousness as a host, and on my "bedside manner". I've had providers ask me about getting together socially outside of the "hobby"...presumably if they had a problem with my being Black, that would never come up.

Of the times I would say that I had stake serious cash that a provider was surprised, the results were:

1) My only "incall" appointment, with a provider in the Dallas area (see review). She seemed surprised, but to her credit pushed her way past it. After some initial, and very brief awkwardness, she was absolutely a lady in every way, and the encounter remains my ATF.

2) The only provider I have ever seen twice was CLEARLY surprised when I opened the door the first time, but again, I really think this was just a "you live HERE?" reaction. The encounter, while not GFE (she didn't kiss, and was a bit standoffish) was really I could hope for from a services stand point. She seemed to agree...because the 2nd time I saw her (she was / is an agency gal), when I opened the door she exclaimed "I had forgot your address but I was hoping it was you!!" (I actually called a different agancy the 2nd time to get the same girl). BTW...this was one of the only two times race actually came up during the "date"...but honestly, how can I complain about a passionate cry of "yes f@ck me with that big black d*ick!!!" :-)....see reviews.

3) The other time race actually came up during a date was my FIRST date (I meant to post this to that "1st encounter" thread sometime back). A well known NYC area provider requires ethnic background be given on her screening form. For weeks I held off, not knowing how to feel about this, but finally decided that based on her revieews, she was the girl for me, and if she had a problem with me, it was her problem. Since the date got arranged, I presumed there was no problem. When she arrived at my place, I saw her, she saw me, and I suppose with our mutual approval we went to dinner. Before that however, she did mention that I would be the first Black man she had ever been with, inside or outside the hobby, and she was a bit concerned becuase she was "built small". I assured her that while I was indeed well hung (well, I am...don't hate me), I wasn't a porn star by any stretch, and that in all of her travels I am sure she had spent time with other guys larger than me. Again, I assume this was "innocent ignorance"...not a reflection of true prejudice on her part. And though we actually didn't have FS ("mother nature" arrived unexpectedly during dinner, and while FS was still offered, I declined), the fact that there was copious amounts of kissing, touching, hugging and other fun, none of which she required a fee for, along with the fact that she called for about two weeks afterwards trying to reschedule, says to me she had no "problem" with me, as an individual, my race notwithstanding.

So....that was my long winded version of "no", I've never noticed a reduction in enthusiasm related to my race. I have wondered more than once however, if I wasn't who I was (clearly educated, with really nice clothes and a fancy address, all of which I am sure put ladies at ease)...if I were just a "regular guy" like most clients...would I get the same treatment.

TruthSpeaker 5592 reads
posted
14 / 30

You are missing the point.  In some cultures, haggling over money is more common than in ours.  In some cultures, women have lower status and are treated differently than in ours.

But prejudice comes in when you assume that someone is like that because they are from one of those cultures. When that happens, you are not seeing them as individuals, and you are exhibiting prejudice.

Martin Luther King said it well in his "I have a dream" speech:
"I have a dream that one day my four children will live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character".

You may say that the individual from that culture would be more likely to have the unwanted characteristics than a white person would (for example, that a Arab man would be more likely to feel he is superior to women), but until the person shows you as an individual through his words or actions that this is so, you are being prejudiced when you assume it is so because of this race or national origin.  

It is indeed more work to take the time to do this, because perhaps a smaller percentage of them will be found to not fit your stereotyped assumptions.  So this is less efficient, and ultimately costs you money.  Why should I have to take on this burden?, you may ask.  Why should I have to run my business less effciently just because it is the right thing to do?  That's a question you and other providers will have to answer for yourselves.  But it is the right thing to do, and unless you are willing to do it, you are indeed prejudiced.

ballsofpower 5854 reads
posted
15 / 30

As an asian man who was born in the USA and has lived here all of his 40+ years, I have observed significant prejudice toward me for most of my life.  Many kids in my school classes were not allowed to play with me because I was the enemy - remember we fought three wars in three decades agains slanty eyed asians.  My family received numerous threats to move from our neighbor hood or else.  My parents were tough and we stayed but it was not easy.

As an asian man attending college in the 70's and 80's there was no "Asian chic" - neither white girls or black girls really were gravitating toward Asian men, while black guys and white guys elevated asian women to a pedestal.  In that sense, Asian men and black women seemed to get the worst of it.

Now that I have become extremely successful in business, of course, I have no problem with women and the Asian male stigma is not really there with the younger generation.  However, every once and a while I continue to be reminded of people's stereotypes toward Asian men.

MyLifeAsMe says he has had no racist exchanges with providers.  By his standards, I have.  I have had providers express surprise that my dick is above average size or that I am not a pre-mature ejaculator.  It really bothers me that many American blacks believe that they have a monopoly on racism and conveniently forget that it is a two way street.  In fact, the most racist individuals I have ever met, specifically against Asian men, have been black.  

The right thing to do is to assume the best in people and not the worst.  Take care of what YOU do and treat people the way you would like to be treated.  Angry screeds do not further the discussion, they alienate the very people who's opinion you'd like to change.  I'm sure the posts in this thread have worked you up, try to get past it.

BTW, for some psychological reason, I have never found asian women attractive.  I'm sure the shrinks would have a field day, but I'm not going to start seeing asian providers to avoid being considered a racist.

howandwhy 4401 reads
posted
16 / 30

Interesting discussion. Raises the issue of rational vs. irrational discrimination. We all make and must make decisions on incomplete information. Sometimes the most efficient way to make decisions is by “profiling,” a practice that has been condemned in many news stories about police impropriety. The fact is that the police are STATISTICALLY correct when they assume the young male black drivers are more likely to be involved in criminal activities than are any other ethnic group. (read Randall Kennedy, Orlando Patterson, D’Nesh D’Souza and John Mc Whorter among others on this.) The problem is that police are not supposed to act based on statistical predictions, but on individual cases.  Police profiling is thus unfair to the vast majority of young black men who are law abiding. So as public policy that directs government officials it is wrong.

Individual decision making is different. Cab drivers, even black cab drivers, often will not pick up young black men, especially if they are not conservatively dressed. Most folks will walk to the other side of the street to avoid a group of young black men socializing on a street corner. Do these reactions unfairly characterize most young black men. You bet. But when one must make a prediction based on incomplete information—especially when balancing, say, one’s safety, against the real but minor slight inflicted, the balance should go to safety.

That is why the comparison of an auto mechanic with an escort is absurd. To refuse to work on someone’s care because of race or ethnic group is racist, irrationally prejudiced. At worst, a mechanic only risks not getting pain. An escort, however, has greater risks, health and safety.  A client, especial a new client,  is always an unknown.  She ‘s entirely reasonable in using whatever information is available to her in making decisions that insure here safety, even if it means refusing an entire category of individuals. The small if umerited slight is far outweighed by considerations of safety. After all, even with the best screening, the escort us usually alone with the client, knowing  really very little about him.

In addition, is it really racist to refuse to have sex, even sex for money,  with a certain ethnic or racial group?  That’s a matter or personal preference, discretion, not law. One can treat another person entirely fairly, even if one refuses to have sex with him. After all,  sex for money is illegal. I don’t believe the Constitution gives the right to perform forbidden acts with others, regardless of race creed or color! (Although Nevada might be an interesting exception!)

YetAnotherAmerican 4932 reads
posted
17 / 30

Culturism (just made that up).  That is if you want to discriminate do so by class, not race.  By all means if you are poor and uneducated, you should be leary of all those rich folks in their Gucci shoes.  And all you Fianancial Advisors should avoid the daughters of the junkyard man to be sure.

My ATF has told me about her "not so pleasant" experiences.  After listening to some comments about some of the guys race, what occured to me was that common thread was the class or culture of the client.

By culture here I am speaking more of life exerience grouping rather than grouping by race as is most common.  Certainly life experience for an AVERAGE black kid growing up in Gary, In is way different than for a white kid growing up in Salt Lake City,
Ut and that will be likely way different from a kid of Middle EAstern decent growing up in Beverly Hills, Ca. The point of this is that there is often a commonality of racial experience based on origin.  Then in the U.S.A. there is a certain commonality of experience based in prejudice too.

What my ATF didn't like was the attitude displayed by MOST men she had experienced who came from lower socio-economic strata than the treatment she got from the clients that she targeted: the professional man (DR., lawyer, CEO, etc).  Though she started talking with racial indicators, I pointed out that she really had no problem with one highly successful client who happened to be black and very good looking and very exciting to be with. On the other hand the only guy that she walked away from was a white guy (her own race) who met her in the lobby looking as though he had just changed out the fittings in the main sewer line of the hotel.

Anoher thing that I found very interesting was that another provider who was her best friend in the biz really liked the sweaty blue collar types with their "I'm here for a fuck so shut up and do me" attitude.

It aint the race, it's how one behaves.  How one behaves is determined by their personal experiences.  Personal experiences most commonly reflect the surroundings of the formative years.  If you were raised in Afganistan you MIGHT hive a difficult time respecting women.  If you were raised in certain parts of Malasia you MIGHT have a difficult time accepting that no man wanted to buy you.

Be careful in selection to be sure, but be nice and treat as you would be treated.

dviantboy 75 Reviews 3163 reads
posted
18 / 30

Of course the world isn't experienced the same way by everyone.  But some of the most serious racist comments and attitudes in the world don't come from us white folk.  

DVB

wantyou94 4 Reviews 2838 reads
posted
19 / 30

I will say that some providers have had problems with large tools in tool boxes.  That's the best reason I can think of on why they exclude black men.  Additionally, a black man does indeed want his "money's worth."  If you can't handle the heat, then don't go in the kitchen.

MoveOn 4553 reads
posted
20 / 30

as men aren't attracted to certain ethnic backgrounds..again because a person is not attracted to a certain ethnicity doesnt mean the person is racist.

TruthSpeaker 3709 reads
posted
21 / 30
MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 4330 reads
posted
22 / 30

As Talisa, when she used to post, pointed out when this discussion first came up...ATTRACTION to your clients has nothing to do with the equation. Escorts provide service to clients they aren't ATTRACTED to all the time. It is the nature of the business, for the most part...men who aren't considered terribly attractive by mainstream standards (independent of how great a guy they might be) pursue "companionship" for money because it is a "sure thing"...and their "attractiveness" is no longer part of the equation.

As Talisa pointed out then, if you are factoring in attractiveness, on top of clean, safe, respectful, prompt and able to pay when selecting cleints, you might consider a new form of business, because this clearly indicates you are emotionally engaged beyond what might be considered healthy for a provider.

Insofar as the "as men aren't attracted to certain ethnic backgrounds..again because a person is not attracted to a certain ethnicity doesnt mean the person is racist." comment, I would say EXACTLY the opposite, and offer this as proof of said persons racist nature. If MILLIONS of women of ALL ethic backgrounds find Will Smith, Denzel Washington, Malik Yoba, Michael Jordan, and several other African American men attractive, but said person doesn't, simply BECAUSE they are African American (versus tall, short, bald, or some other characteristic that could be attributed to any man of any race), then I'd say that is the surest marker of any that the woman in question is racist. Plain as day.

Since this isn't clear...and I've stated it several times...the definition of racist is someone who makes decision about people based on race, then what do YOU think is the definition thereof, since you are so convinced you aren't racist?

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 3672 reads
posted
23 / 30
MoveOn 3841 reads
posted
24 / 30

Dont speak for me because it does for me..I want to get the most I can out of an encounter..I do provide a service and I aim to give the best I can, I want it to be as enjoyable for me as it is for him,otherwise I feel like a phoney, sucking money from him..Knowing what I like is a big part of it..he chose me based on what HE prefers..I do the same..Of course there have been a few occasions when Im not attracted to a gentleman,but it was usually chemistry and not what he looked like..I do know Im sure as hell NOT going to go into it KNOWING before hand that Im not going to be sexual attracted to him ..all gentleman deserve 100% from a provider..If I know beforehand I cant give it..then I wont see him..Im an adult I know what Im NOT attracted to, and the money exchanging hands doesnt change the way I feel.
 You can name call, but I still stand firm..Not being sexually attracted to a certain ethnic background is not a racist..its about sexual preference.And finding certain people attractive (African American actors you mentioned) doesnt have anything to do with being SEXUALLY attracted to them.


-- Modified on 10/26/2002 3:21:42 AM

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 2876 reads
posted
25 / 30

You ARE doing a great job of speaking for yourself, actually...becoming more clear with each post, though you still haven't actually definded what "racist" is in your book, since you think the text book definition doesn't apply.

While you're at it, I wouldn't mind knowing the difference between "sexually attracted" and "attracted". That is a good one too...you mean, attractive like, what, a well bred golden retriver?

"Of course there have been a few occasions when Im not attracted to a gentleman,but it was usually chemistry and not what he looked like"

Then is the greatest contradiction of all...if it doesn't matter "what he looked like", then WHAT IN HEAVENS NAME seperates me (that you don't find "sexually attractive") from otehr men? If you understand (and perhaps you don't) that race is ONLY a matter of physical appearance...that everything else about me defines me as an individual, independent of my race, and if it doesn't matter "what he looked like"...then how do you make the decision to turn away African American hobbyist (who by the way, thanks to the power of genetics and the facts of racial blending through time, seem to come in more different variations of appearance than whites) simply because they are African American UNLESS your judgement is based on racial stereotypes?

I'll try to be more clear....you don't know what your clients look like in advance...independent of race. Indeed, up until this thread, you might not have even thought to screen based on race (I don't know, and certainly am willing to be corrected on this). And you say that you don't care what they look like...the only thing that matters is chemistry (agreed...) which would be established beforehand.

So...if it doesn't matter what *I* look like, and we establish this great chemistry in advance, what happens when I arrive that changes your mind when you see I am African American that ISN'T racist? Everything about me was A-OK...and the only unknown was my appearance (I'm not bad looking BTW...have had more than one provider ask me "why are you doing this?") and once you KNOW my appearance (again, assuming you understand that race only directly affect APPEARANCE), you find me "un attractive sexually", even though you claim appearance doesn't matter.

Maybe the disconnect is that I still don't know your definiton of "racist". I suspect that isn't it however...my guess is that you simply prefer to be in denial about the truth...chosing instead to diminish it as "name calling".


-- Modified on 10/26/2002 8:35:15 AM

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 4578 reads
posted
26 / 30

Agreed...and along the lines of the nature of my arguement....when tis debate raged before, months past, I was asked if ladies had a "right" to turn away whomever they liked.

First, they have a "right" to do anything they please. Just be woman enough to admit to your behavior, versus not liking the label associated with it.

But, to the point, I had said in the past thread that a lady could use ANY CRITERA SHE WISHED for screening that made her most comfortable, and be ok with me (not that they cared what I thought), so long as it was a UNIVERSALLY APPLIED CRITERA for ALL MEN. If a gal only wants to date guys of a certain social strata, fine. if she only wants to date those who she can verify as exerprienced hobbyiest, with provider references, fine. Hell, if she only wanted to date guys over 6 feet tall, fine.

But, if you only want to date guys of a certain race, then admit to being racist. Don't just decide you don't like the label...be woman enoough to own up to your behavior.

What you point is the unstated reality...that those who screen against race but don't think of themselves as racist are much more than likely TRYING to screen against certain cultural / economic characteristics - behaviors. This I don't have a problem with...except the ASSUMPTION that since I am African American, then I must posses the cultural / economic traits she is screening against.

You want to screen against bargain hunters? I ABHOR the notion of negotating rates (and have posted as much here many times). You want to screen against potential trouble makers? I have never been arrested, charged, even picked up for questioning about anything in my life. I have no experience with LE beyond traffic stops...I've never even SEEN the inside of a police station (can all providers say that?). You don't want to deal with drug users? I've never used any illegal drug besides marijuna in my life, and haven't indulged in THAT vice in over 15 years. You don't want to deal with a guy who is going to "get his money worth"? I chose my "dates" carefully...I know what to expect in advance. If you weren't going to provide what I was looking for, we wouldn't be speaking. Above and beyond that however, I am told that I am a "good date"...that with the dinner and wine, and gentlemanly attention I try to provide independent's (agency girls just come for the hour and leave...their loss), ladys are pleasantly surprised by how much THEY received.

My point is that *I*...and all men, regardless of color (how many times have we had really big guys post on this board wanting to be certain that they'd be treated fairly and given a chance?) want to be judged on our OWN merits as individuals, not painted with one broad paint brush and pigeon holed.

aphroditez 5656 reads
posted
27 / 30

IMHO, it has everything to do with attitude no matter where you go.  In reading the post below regarding car repairs, yes, people are turned down.  I know my mechanic very well and it is all in how you present yourself to a person as to how receptive they are.  So it is in this endeavor also.  I do however think a lot of people tend to take those negative attitudes and apply them to race.  

Just an opinion.

Lauren

crack snacker 4438 reads
posted
28 / 30

They have a tendancy to have more melanin in their skin than do others.

mr_punk 24 Reviews 5285 reads
posted
29 / 30

how many of those YOUNG black men are purchasing the services of a $$$/hr escort?

MyLifeAsMe 8 Reviews 4816 reads
posted
30 / 30

...the answer is "not many".

Aside from

1) Age screening. Most escorts don't see guys under age 25 or so as a rule.

2) Access to funds...contry to every stupid media stereotype, not all, or most, or even A SIGNIFICANT percentage of African American men are drug dealers, or the like. Indeed, every time a meaningful and unbias study is done, it shows that drug use is statisitcally higher amongest whites than blacks, and in the surburbs versus urban areas. Now, admittedly, the drug of choice differs...there is no denying that the numbers for white suburbanites includes the use of relatively harmless marijuna.
But, don't think for a second that recreational use of "X" in the suburbs isn't out of control amongest young whites, or that for every African American crack head there isn't a white heroin junkie or cokehead. The MEDIA IMAGES are the difference...

3) The biggest thing however is that you don't see young African American men visiting escorts as a rule because of cultural bias. "Black men don't pay for it" I was once told...and I have never let that notion go. I was going to post about my recent golf trip in the thread below that asked about "telling your friends about your hobbying".

I was recently away for a week golfing with a close acquitance (Black) and 6 other white guys that he knew, but I didn't. There were 3 guys who talked EVERY NIGHT...openly...about getting together with local escorts that they knew (apparently they made a trip to this particular resort town often..say once a month or so during golf season). To them there was no shame or embarassment, even though two of the 3 were married. My friend and I on the other hand spoke "offline" (when we were alone) about how we just didn't understand those guys... and how we would never "pay for pussy". (I of course didn't confess to having seen escorts myself...which is my point...and for all I know he was lying as well).  If I were to think about a young African American who could afford to see a $$$/hr escort...would he EVER actually do so, versus just flashing cash and picking up civilian girls? It is difficult for me to imagine. I am certain it happens, but like you said, the question is, how often...

Register Now!