So I'm entertaining a client today....I was on my hands and knees while he was behind me. I felt his finger slowly glide into my ass. I'm fine with that, but I knew exactly where the situation was going. All the sudden I feel his cock *attempt* to slide into my ass.

"What the fuck are you doing", I asked.

"Oh, I'm just playing with you," he said.

"Do it again, and I'll fuck you up the ass," I snapped.

Trying to fuck me up the ass without my permission is not what I'd consider playing. None of my reviews mention anything about anal. Needless to say, it wasn't the most fantastic date ever.

Date #2 of the day didn't go much better. I have very specific instructions about how to enter my building, because all doors and elevators are controlled by an electronic key fob. According to my instructions, clients must use the building keypad to gain entrance to my floor. So I'm getting ready for my 2 o'clock date. At 140, I hear a knock at my door. I run to the door half dressed, makeup half on, and laughing like a total kook thinking it's a friend within my building. I look out peephole, and I see my client standing there. I asked him if I could help him. He said that he was here for his appointment. I told him that he had to come back at the scheduled appointment time, 2 p.m. At 2 o'clock he returns without even an apology for coming early. He acted as if I had no right to send him away. We immediately it down, and he asks about two cups of coffee. He just seemed like an incredibly unhappy person as well as being a man who didn't like to submit to a single demand of any woman.

I don't really know why I'm writing this, because most of the men on this board are incredibly wonderful.

Lesson #1 - Please don't accidentally try to have anal sex with a provider.

Lesson #2 - Do NOT arrive early with first recieving permission. My boyfriend could have been here. My mom could have been leaving. I could be brushing my teeth, putting my contacts in, smoking a joint, talking to my physician or any other number of important activies.

Happy weekend everyone! I'm going to Milwaukee tonight to see Simon and Garfunkel. I never thought I'd be so excited to go to Milwaukee. It's a beautiful day here in Chicago. It's about 70 degrees and sunny. And almost just as great as S & G - Brad Paisley is in town for Taste of Chicago. No matter where I live, I will always love country music. Behave yourselves

to any of your posts and told you just what an incredible woman I think you are?

Your wit and intelligence are above par but your ability to use an eloquent, declaritive sentence and burns someons ass at the same time is a trait I sorely wish I possesed.

Memorable Quotes from just this post:

"What the fuck are you doing", I asked.

"Oh, I'm just playing with you," he said.

"Do it again, and I'll fuck you up the ass," I snapped.

and....

Lesson #2 - Do NOT arrive early without(sic) first recieving permission. My boyfriend could have been here. My mom could have been leaving. I could be brushing my teeth, putting my contacts in, smoking a joint, talking to my physician or any other number of important activies.

You my dear are truly an Intersting Woman, it would have been a pleasure to have met you in person, I really wish I had.....

Accidentally in Love- Song from Shrek 2

Accidentally in your ass- Not a Hit with the ladies

Don't go anywhere you are not invited- good rule of my youth

Don't put your finger in our ass without washing it beforehand and washing it after before inserting into other areas. I would just prefer no finger at all. By having to wash inbetween, it takes the pleasure out of all of it.

Thanks & hugs,
Ciara

Valid points

OR

Practice with your ass and make it a profit center.

Add it to your list of talents

or ... should I jam a stick up my ass?

Thanks, IW.
2 very important lessons that I'm sure most of us guys don't need to be reminded of, but there are a few that still do.

After all this time, it still bothers me that I will never understand that part of the male ego that makes some of us think you ladies  are there simply as our toy, for our own personel gratification, to do with as we want.

Thank God there are enough of us "others" out here that, hopefully, make things easier for you ladies.

I can't state it enough...

Be nice to each other, respect each other, and play fair.

Just my opinion...
B

I hope your weekend is better than your Friday.  I'm sure some good music will improve your mood.  It's too bad you can't screen for client's attitudes.  

tennis

"Lesson #1 - Please don't accidentally try to have anal sex with a provider."

And to inject a bit of humor:
http://somethingpositive.net/sp02292004.shtml  

--b.

Nothing will kill your boner quicker than coming early, only to see my husband strapping our kids into the minivan driving away, the little tots gaily waving "Bye Mommy!"

This happened the other day. PLEASE don't be early.

So what if he is early? Be gracious and let him in. Get over it. Let him relax and offer him a drink, then proceed to do whatever you have to do. He is human, and he is paying. Maybe he was trying to be punctual and traffic was good that day.

As far as cock up the ass, well, nevermind. I am enjoying my unmoderated status.

fin

What the fuck…being the BF of a provider, many times I AM who she is doing 20 minutes before her appointment!
Should we just invite him in, offer him a drink, and have him watch me finish her off on the living room floor before she goes and tidies up her makeup?

Sorry, many times (her time) we are busy taking care of our needs, before she goes to work to take care of her clients needs.
Her time is for her; the appointed time is for her client…

If traffics good, go buy a bottle of wine guys…

SM

Maybe you "Backed that ass up" just a tad bit more than usual.

It happens you know.

...do you provide?

Empty in here, ain't it????

-- Modified on 6/25/2004 9:54:29 PM

A true master could do this and the provider would never even know it.  In fact, it's one of the lesser-known ninja initiation rites.  Not something you learn from watching the Turtles.

/Zin

We as clients need to respect a providers time. Her time is just that...her time.

I've been rather lucky I think. Being a newbie, I have a few sessions were the time of the provider was very generous ON THE BACK SIDE OF THE APPOINTMENT. One girl just seemed to really enjoy talking...and I was very happy to fill that need...as I thought she was a goddess at the least!

I wish someone would take the time to explain to me the appeal of "Greek" or 'back door entry'. Being a man of large girth, I am very concerned about hurting a provider in the normal course of action. I'm over 300lbs and most of you ladies are 100lbs wet in bathrobes! I try hard to be gentle, and ask often "am I hurting you?" Last thing I would want to do is hurt her in anyway...and anal sex just seems to me to be something that would hurt bad. I make it a habbit to never go 'where I'm not invited' and do not see the turn on of anal sex.

Tell us about it. I admit I do enjoy greek from time to time, but, while back had a young feller whom wanted doggie (or so he said after I yelped) and missed the spot. Needless to say that was rather painful. Guys always be honest and up front if you wish to come in back.

I bet you never guessed I could be *so* classy. Yep, that's me...full of class, especially when it comes to language.

"If traffics good, go buy a bottle of wine guys…"

Sounds like the kind of BF who is leeching off his girlfriends tricks. Might not be the case, but that's the impression I got from reading it.

Would you enjoy cigars and titty mags more than wine?

-- Modified on 6/26/2004 12:00:12 PM

-- Modified on 6/26/2004 12:00:42 PM

Should you go back to your car, sit in the parking lot, and roast in humiliation? The only thing I like to stack are pancakes.

being a little early shouldn't be a crime. Just how early was he?

Hugs,
Ciara

trying to accidentally push someone off of a bridge. That reminds me of some movies, "A River Runs Through It", "Bridge Over The River Qwai" (but why?), "Baby's Got Your Back."  Sorry, but I just couldn't resist.

Hugs,
Ciara

My feelings are that, as a gentleman, I take care of expenses when we are together.  Tickets, meals, vacations, groceries and even her rent when I can. We have been seeing each other for over two years now and I am simply taking care of someone I have deep feelings for.

Don’t lump me in, as a “typical provider boyfriend” and I’ll try not to presume your just another asshole hobbyist who thinks with only his little head.

Any more here is a waste of energy because I don’t think you could ever understand…

SM

A dentist has a waiting room because he expects you to be waiting for him.

I am sure there are many different types of ladies out there. Some may live and breathe their work and have no life outside of providing. Half hour either way may not matter to them, if a clients early or stays late, helps pass the time.
Some I suspect separate work from their personal life and set time aside for both.
ALL I was suggesting is to respect an appointed time and don’t presume it’s ever ok to show up early.

SM

You're exactly right. It's not the same thing as showing up for a dentist or doctor's appointment early. I don't have a receptionist or a waiting room. There are times when I'm getting ready right up until the gentleman walks in that door. Perhaps I'm just too mannerly, but I've always known it's impolite to arrive early without a phone call. And you're right Stealth - it's not acceptable to arrive early. My time is my time. Either respect or don't see me. I won't cry either way.

Stealthmode happens to be one of MANY clients who HAS phoned me when early, and has taken it upon THEMSELVES to use that time to go to Ralph's and surprise me with wine or roses - and me and the client SHARE the wine....surprise, surprise!    There ARE REALLY men who do this type of thing, PP. REALLY.

-- Modified on 6/26/2004 7:00:54 PM

Dear NM.

I don't have to see the dentist running around trying to pull off the condom and change his shorts, now do I? Our biz is VERY personal.  I know that if I was a client in a biz as personal as this, I don't want my fantasy girl off in another room doing her thing for 45 min. alone, or otherwise.  Sort of breaks the mood.  

But since I am an escort, when the client ENTERS, ALLLLLLLLLLLLL my focus goes into HIM. I don't sit him down and then disappear for 45 min doing other things.  Maybe 5 min, but that doesn't go onto his time clock either.   It's just that I am focused on HIM once he enters the door.  Is that such a bad thing?  And yes, I am grateful he shows up.    

Anyway, I don't have the problem of gents showing up early, as I have found a way to circumvent that situation.  We have an understanding about time before we even meet.




-- Modified on 6/26/2004 7:13:39 PM

IW,  I wanted to post when you first put this up, but I was doing an overnight.

First off I totally agree with you about early arrivals.  I have JOKED many times about not being able to accommodate early arrival, because my butler is off for the week doing who knows what while I'm in the tub splish splashin at the last minute with Sir Ducky of the Rubber Royal Lineage, and  gettin all spic and span and girly.

There is NO way I can hear a client knockin at the door, nor would I answer the door ahead of time, lest it be, (God Forbid!) the manager of the building or a chatty neighbor. Believe me, I've been through this and I talk with gents ahead of time as a preventative measure to ensure that this behavior of knocking on the door unannounced does not happen.  I also email them, instructing that they call me 15-20 min ahead so as to coordinate time, JUST IN CASE.  I lost an appt once because I was dumping the trash in the hall receptacle and missed him, and he did not bother to phone back.  Hmmm.

Second thing...on anal. I totally agree. I KNOW when it's there.  Even got mirrors to confirm that. And just in case they decide to try slippin off the condom while they're at it, lol.  

Finally, I think that might be worth wearing a butt plug for, lol.  A VERY small one.  With a KEEP OUT sign.  Or, a NOT FOR RENT sign.  

I like CiCi's comment about a back up beep (garbage truck?)


-- Modified on 6/26/2004 7:22:43 PM

That is HILARIOUS.  I've hung around enough garbage trucks to know what inspired that comment, dear Ci Ci!!!

Xoxo to you and welcome back from Italy....

Time for an anatomy exam.  Question #1...where is a woman's CLIT?  

XOXO

LMAO...hahahahahaa...I love the butt plug idea. I wish I would have thought of that sooner.

You're absolutely smart requesting a phone call 15-20 minutes ahead of time. I usually don't answer my door either. I was sleeping most of the day, and just knew my best friend would come down from her floor any second. When I answered, I was very surprised to see a man. He could have avoided this entire situation had he followed my instructions. My instructions each and every time are to go outside my buidling, dial my apartment, wait for the buzzer, and take the elevator up to my floor. During the day, people can walk in the building, but I still have to buzz them up on the elevator. I'm not quite sure how he gained entrance to the elevator considering an electronic key fob. My guess is he asked one of the other residents to push my floor number, because there's no way he could have used the elevator otherwise.