TER General Board

It IS her perogative
deadfall 1 Reviews 263 reads
posted

You do your thing and she does hers.   I personally prefer it if a provider is up front about her preferences.  So far I've never run into the "No AAs" situation.  That may be due in part that my "pay for play" activity is BDSM as a sub/pain slut.

I just spied yet another ad in which a provider says, “Please, no African American men.” I suppose it is her prerogative ... just as it is mine to call someone else. Which I do. Thoughts?

Why can't she?  This cockamamie theory that what we do is a buyer's market is a bit misplaced. A hobbyist can find a gal that he wants to see but the next step is clearly her deciding if she wants to see him.  It's a two step process and always will be.

Twenty years ago I used to cruise for streetwalkers.  Most girls in Boston's Combat Zone in the 80's and 90's wouldn't get into a van, a black Ford LTD with black wall tires or a car with a sketchy-looking driver or a bunch of guys inside.  Some wouldn't get into a car with a Black or Hispanic driver.  Things really haven't changed. Like I said, it's a two step process.

-- Modified on 11/21/2012 5:21:07 PM

Of course I wouldn't sleep with a white dude either or a dude with breasts, but that's because I' a bigoted homophobic racist...OR maybe I don't like sleeping with people with dicks.  Either way, it's my choice.

Gotta love living in the USA where you can choose who you get to sleep with and you also get to choose who pays you to sleep with them.  Lately nobody is paying me, but if they were, I'd still like to have a choice in the matter.

Maybe they'll  be happy if all African American quit hobbying. But on a serious note I wouldn't give it a second thought. Just as you indicated, just simply move on.

the dick being too big and not fitting in is the problem, no problem. Would you by any change see non whites now?

Eh got no reply. I guess some people just like it that way.

Posted By: dukkar
Maybe they'll  be happy if all African American quit hobbying. But on a serious note I wouldn't give it a second thought. Just as you indicated, just simply move on.

I remember many female white porn stars saying they will not perform with black men because their base, which are white guys, do not like it. It turns them off and they need their fans basically to stay on top since so many females wish to be the top star and whatever. The guy that shot Larry Flynt claims he did so because of Flynt's layout of a white woman with a black man. Mocha is correct. I have seen and been with many white big cocks! :P

.....  or ask for caucasian or asian (including indians (east indian not native american)) or middle eastern etc.....basically everything but black (or want latina of the fairer variety) I'm not like "what about me" lol. I just don't care.  For every one that doesn't like or "prefer' what you are there are at least 2 to replace them who love your "kind".



-- Modified on 11/22/2012 12:19:22 AM

crazyshit455 reads

Chris Rock said (and I'm paraphrasing here):  "You know who are the most confident women around?  Big black women.  They don't give a fuck what you think about them.  They'll be sitting around saying, 'Yeah...I got a gut.  But you know what?  There's some good pussy underneath that gut!'"

Don't ever change.  You're clearly an intelligent BBW black woman.  Not my type at all, but you get it, missy.  :)

crazyshit410 reads

But it's refreshing to see a woman who doesn't have self-esteem issues.

Trust me...some of the women that I know that are just gorgeous will drive you just goddamn nuts with their constant self-esteem issues.

(though my gut doesn't hide my vagina I was serious about that lol)

.... are you saying i'm not gorgeous? (kidding kidding).  :)
I know what you mean about gorgeous women with the worst self-esteem I have a friend is the spitting image of the singer Mya (I think she's hotter than her actually) who has crappy self-esteem (never understood why) *shrugs*
Anyways if I see one more why no AA men topics i'm going to officially lose it. I'm convinced they are popping up now like every damn 2 wks just to be funny. *sighs*


-- Modified on 11/22/2012 3:04:13 AM

about the "two weeks." The last one was on the 6th (15 days ago.) See my post below. (Which I posted before I read this post from you!) :)

Providers can see who they want. If you don't want to see them due to a preference, so what? It could be for many reasons and they are none of your business. I see hobbyist ask for such and such but not big girls, no black girls, no this and no that. Should I then say, hmm, he doesn't want a black girl. He is discriminating. I won't see him if he contacts me. You seem to feel that if a provider states her preference to let the audience know up front who she won't see then it's an offense even if you are not the stated party that she won't entertain LOL! Why the hell do you care? Why do you let it concern you? You are silly but whatever. Move on and she will be alright not seeing this one or that one as I am sure you will be too. :)  

Face it there is prejudice against people who are very visably overweight.  Now with the media bring out how overweight creates health problems and early death added to resentment of high health care costs  prejudice just increases.

....thanks so much much for sharing what I already know (for w/e reason).

Happy turkey day.  *eats turkey leg*  :D

-- Modified on 11/22/2012 4:23:43 PM

crazyshit324 reads

Mocha and I didn't correspond about seeing each other, but she did ask me what I thought about NYC and its pricing, and what she should charge.

The first thing she acknowledged was that she was a niche market.  She knows what her market is, and it ain't for guys who want skinny and slender white girls.  But Mocha has her own market, and my guess is she does well at it.  She gets how this works, and her personality is great.  On top of that, she is very articulate and intelligent.

Some girls don't get it at all (there is a thread in the Newbie section where I have gone back and forth with this one girl who is a perfect example), but Mocha ain't one of them.

I think it's time for a dick size post, or "where should I cum?"

Zangari346 reads

I'm always surprised when a provider excludes an entire race of potential clients.  Probably not a good business practice.  The best explanation regarding an 'NBA' policy  comes from Maggie McNeil's  'The Honest Courtesan' blog (see link).   Excellent blog, BTW.   --z

..... (or a whites only policy) it wouldn't affect my business much (note I love black men just fine in real life and in the hobby and don't discriminate on race in either) because majority like 70% being extra conservative in the amount of who come to see me are white men (non-hispanic). I'd say black (American, African, Caribbean whatever) men are like 20% and remaining 10% are "others". It would hurt it a good bit since about 30% is a big chunk but wouldn't kill it (then again not sure how many white men would be actually turned off from booking a provider with such policies).

THEN again i'm guessing most  (if not all) of the black guys who come here to complain about NBA providers aren't complaining about black providers anyways (again just a guess). And most of that article didn't tell me what I already knew but was a really good read. My experience with black men hasn't been worse or better than mine with anyone else. ALSO i've seen plenty of huge white dicks lol.

Zangari344 reads


If a provider is screening her clients, then I don't see why race would be a consideration. A provider once mentioned to me that she doesn't see black clients.  Our conversation went something like this:

Provider:  I don't see black men.

Z:  What about Denzel?

Provider:  It doesn't matter, I don't see black men.  

Z:  (incredulous) You'll  see me--a 48 year old white guy, but not Denzel.

Provider:  That's right.  

Z:  Why is that?

Provider:  I just don't see black men.

I didn't push it any further.  On the other hand, a lot of providers also refuse to see men under a certain age.  So it's not just a racial thing.   --z




Posted By: Zangari
I'm always surprised when a provider excludes an entire race of potential clients.  Probably not a good business practice.  The best explanation regarding an 'NBA' policy  comes from Maggie McNeil's  'The Honest Courtesan' blog (see link).   Excellent blog, BTW.   --z

 

You have no confidence in your actions and require acceptance from strangers to accept and say “you did the right thing”.

It is free country, you may act and do as you wis as long as your action doesn’t hurt anyone else. EEO don’t really apply to personal lives as long as you blatantly encourage it on the free society.

Another thought, who gives a flying fuck as to what you do or anyone else does? You don’t like something, someone, disagree, move the fuck on and stop asking the same damn question for gazillion’th time.

EXCELLENT!!!!!

Posted By: anonymousfun
You have no confidence in your actions and require acceptance from strangers to accept and say “you did the right thing”.

It is free country, you may act and do as you wis as long as your action doesn’t hurt anyone else. EEO don’t really apply to personal lives as long as you blatantly encourage it on the free society.

Another thought, who gives a flying fuck as to what you do or anyone else does? You don’t like something, someone, disagree, move the fuck on and stop asking the same damn question for gazillion’th time.

saturnsky413 reads

If many providers are unwilling to see AA men, then there is some reasoning behind it beside racism one would think. And this refusal extends to some AA women as well. So if some AA women do not want to see men of their own race, what does that say?

I am not saying it's right or wrong, However, if it extends across the board, there has to be some reasoning behind why some women will not entertain AA men that transcends the color of their skin. I believe it's more cultural than pigment oriented.

What does it matter? There are white providers who will see black guys! They can find those providers and have fun! No need to continue to bring this up! They have their reasons for it. I think it's ridiculous that some seem to want to know why they choose to see who they want!

saturnsky353 reads


considering the frequency in which this topic is brought up. All I did was mention that there must be some credence to it since it's there, like that giant pink elephant in the room. Whether it's a skin color thing, an attitude thing or a cultural thing...it's still there.

I do agree that it's a personal choice and rarely does a hobbyists personal choices get regurgitated ad nauseam against a particular type of provider, but this is a monger board, so I guess that;s why.


No one will ever change someone’s feeling through legislation, persuasion, force, bitching about it and so on. What one feels strongly about their personal feeling is out of bounds to every one else. The best you are ever going to accomplish is to have them tolerate it. It is something like agreeing to disagree kind of thing.

If one puts as much effort into one’s own beliefs and one’s own behavior instead of focusing on others, one is better off. All one has to do is realize the fact that every one has their preferences whether you agree or disagree.  

Posted By: saturnsky

considering the frequency in which this topic is brought up. All I did was mention that there must be some credence to it since it's there, like that giant pink elephant in the room. Whether it's a skin color thing, an attitude thing or a cultural thing...it's still there.

I do agree that it's a personal choice and rarely does a hobbyists personal choices get regurgitated ad nauseam against a particular type of provider, but this is a monger board, so I guess that;s why.

I'd rather continue seeing black men (who have in my personal experience always been consummate gentlemen like most professionals I spend time with) than the obese or men old enough to be my great-grandfather.

I find it funny that a girl won't see a black man but she'll repeatedly see a 400 lb non-black whale as if that does something for her.

People can do whatever they want, but again, being extremely honest....I cannot think of a black client I've ever seen (with the exception of a porn star who nearly sent me to the hospital and I canceled the rest of my tour because I was nearly split in half) who I would not see many, many, many, many times over, be friends with, recommend highly etc.  This isn't just me speaking as a black woman who doesn't have any hangups or preferences (call me the U.N. because I've dated and loved men of all races)- this is me speaking as an experienced professional who has seen many clients through agencies and independently.  I work at an average price point but I have high standards of those I communicate and choose to spend time with or repeat with.

I have never experienced anything from a black client that has caused me to say "it isn't right, but I kind of get it."

Frankly, the whole prevalence of "no black clients" puzzles the shit out of me.
I've read that BP-exclusive girls say it because their pimps are trying to ward off competition, I've heard multiple black women say its 'too close to home' (whatever the fuck that means) and I've heard women say that its because of how they're approached by black men.

But to say no to professional clients because of color or "lack of attraction" (because yes, a young hot and sexy woman is attracted to and would screw EVERYONE she meets professionally without the element of money *side eye*) is just baffling.
I've never read a real argument for it that holds water so it really boils down to pointed racism in my opinion.  Lets just call it what it is.  I'm curious if European or Asian escorts have rules against black clients- but I'm nearly certain I already know the answer.

It isn't going to change so everyone should just sidestep it.
Black clients get plenty of love from girls who don't have these weird, inexplicable hangups.


-- Modified on 11/22/2012 5:08:29 PM

madiba51433 reads

It takes some energy to get to know someone as an individual person.  I have nearly always found it to be a worthwhile effort.  But some people would rather stereotype.

On the other hand you may be. This nothing but pure PC bull crap, There is prejudice every where. Black, white, brown, yellow. There is prejudice between whites, between blacks, between latinos, between Indians, amongst Christians, amongst Muslims, Amongst Buddhists, Hindus, whatever.

The real problem is the misunderstanding of what equality and civil treatment each other really entails. It only requires you not to persecute anyone on the basis of their skin color, race and gender nothing more. It doesn’t mean you have to invite them into your house, have dinner with them, have drinks with them, hold hands with them, etc. The social networking crowd that posts when they take crap on Twitter or willing to forgo their privacy by posting on Facebook may feel otherwise but they delusional and clueless to start with.

There was only one Mahatma Gandhi and if majority of us dumb shits felt any where close to what he felt about other human beings, world will not have witness so much violence. Here is two things to ponder:

It has always been a mystery to me how men can feel themselves honoured by the humiliation of their fellow beings.
Mahatma Gandhi

In matters of conscience, the law of the majority has no place.
Mahatma Gandhi

Truthfully answer the two, you have your answer.

While you are making an issue of discrimination based on race/skin color, at the same time you discriminate based on age and size. The difference is you have a "politically correct" definition for racial discrimination..."racism". Why is discrimination against someone's skin color wrong but discrimination against someone's age or size okay? Myself being a 350 pd white "whale", I've been discriminated a handful of times though I can't say I've been turned down but one occasion being tricked out of the room, it's still a business albeit technically "illegal", everyone in business regardless of its nature has the right to serve or refuse service. Whether not wanting to be intimate with a monger based on age, size, or even race that's their right. The argument may be that "normal" businesses cannot refuse service based on race, and that is valid but the individual has the self-determined right to do what they will or won't to their self. IMO regarding black men and white providers who discriminate, it has more to do culturally and too much extent the high crime rate among the black population. The thug/gangsta culture is popular among young black men, and often times you'll see white providers who do not see black men under a certain age.

E-racism377 reads

The topic comes up and some (anonymous) tend to get bent outta shape... Facts are facts, if you discriminate against anything you will have a reason for doing so... I look at the post for what it is, now what I will say is "hey if you choose not to see a client because of his or her race then at least be "professional enough to state your case"... Now that doesn't mean go into a life story, but if for instance she says "I don't see black men" and he ask (politely) why is that? And she immediately ignores him or whatever else..."who's being the ignorant one."... If she Semi-explained I'm pretty sure it will either shed some light on the situation or she may (as one commenter put it) show that she's not lazy and it work out for the better of the two.....(either way, in this dog eat dog world filled with idiots and "hidden racist" someone has to start somewhere if we're ever gonna make a change) .... I really enjoyed the article from the Contu and honestly a few people (of all races could learn something by reading it).... In the mean time I recommend providers assist hobbiest by adding a Lil more to their page... Like NIAA (not into African Americans) or NIA (not into Asians) or whatever... Because for some, it takes a lot of work to screen a provider only to find out your work was in vain..... (That may or may not come off as attitude or resentment towards the provider)...... Hey in the end we're all trying to accomplish a common goal.."happiness in one form or another".... P.S the open minded providers just got added to my favorites and on my world tour, see ya soon!, lol

Zangari361 reads

Posted By: E-racism
. Facts are facts, if you discriminate against anything you will have a reason for doing so... I look at the post for what it is, now what I will say is "hey if you choose not to see a client because of his or her race then at least be "professional enough to state your case"...
I think your heart is in the right place, but you're missing an important point:  a provider shouldn't have to justify why she won't see me or you or anyone else.  Most of us have felt the sting of a provider who won't reply to an e-mail or text.  Bottom line: She doesn't want to see me & she doesn't have to explain why.  Likewise, if a provider doesn't want to see a race of people, she's entitled to that choice. It doesn't matter whether it seems rational to you or me.  Here's the good news: you don't have to explain why you don't want to see redheads or BBWs.  --z




Now that doesn't mean go into a life story, but if for instance she says "I don't see black men" and he ask (politely) why is that? And she immediately ignores him or whatever else..."who's being the ignorant one."... If she Semi-explained I'm pretty sure it will either shed some light on the situation or she may (as one commenter put it) show that she's not lazy and it work out for the better of the two.....(either way, in this dog eat dog world filled with idiots and "hidden racist" someone has to start somewhere if we're ever gonna make a change) .... I really enjoyed the article from the Contu and honestly a few people (of all races could learn something by reading it).... In the mean time I recommend providers assist hobbiest by adding a Lil more to their page... Like NIAA (not into African Americans) or NIA (not into Asians) or whatever... Because for some, it takes a lot of work to screen a provider only to find out your work was in vain..... (That may or may not come off as attitude or resentment towards the provider)...... Hey in the end we're all trying to accomplish a common goal.."happiness in one form or another".... P.S the open minded providers just got added to my favorites and on my world tour, see ya soon!, lol

Why do some people insist, others have to comply with what they think the others should do. There is only one rule in a free society and that is “my exercising my choices on my free will must not interfere, curtail, restrict, others exercising there free will and should not cause harm to anyone or to the society”.

That’s the only rule and as long as one stick to it, no explanation to anyone is necessary.


are the yelling “Racism” every chance they get and can’t see anyone who doesn’t agree with them who happens to be a different race as racist.   When providers include NIAA as you say then people like yourself yell racism.  

When a lady says “she doesn’t see so and so”, she doesn’t need to explain anythings, it is called personal preference or choice.

There are some providers, white, black, asian whom I would not see. Why? I don’t think, chemistry would not be there. How do I know? No scientific facts but just a feeling.

You are the one who appears to be bent out of shape and wanting reasons.  All I am saying is every human being in every strata all over the old has this need to feel “I am superior than you”. Unless you have are a Mahatma, you have it too, every day. Human’s have not achieved the state enlightenment you seem to demand from everyone because you have not achieved it yourself.  Americans, especially have to feel superior than every other country, we belittle Europe (blacks and whites) and African Americans see Blacks from Africa inferior and likewise African blacks see African Americans having no black culture and feel superior.

You need to get out of your sand box and look around, read a little, talk to others (it would be difficult for you to do) then when you become a Mahatma, let me know.

Me on the other hand know difference between personal space and public space and you won’t find me on FaceBook, You Tube and Twitter!  

Posted By: E-racism
The topic comes up and some (anonymous) tend to get bent outta shape... Facts are facts, if you discriminate against anything you will have a reason for doing so... I look at the post for what it is, now what I will say is "hey if you choose not to see a client because of his or her race then at least be "professional enough to state your case"... Now that doesn't mean go into a life story, but if for instance she says "I don't see black men" and he ask (politely) why is that? And she immediately ignores him or whatever else..."who's being the ignorant one."... If she Semi-explained I'm pretty sure it will either shed some light on the situation or she may (as one commenter put it) show that she's not lazy and it work out for the better of the two.....(either way, in this dog eat dog world filled with idiots and "hidden racist" someone has to start somewhere if we're ever gonna make a change) .... I really enjoyed the article from the Contu and honestly a few people (of all races could learn something by reading it).... In the mean time I recommend providers assist hobbiest by adding a Lil more to their page... Like NIAA (not into African Americans) or NIA (not into Asians) or whatever... Because for some, it takes a lot of work to screen a provider only to find out your work was in vain..... (That may or may not come off as attitude or resentment towards the provider)...... Hey in the end we're all trying to accomplish a common goal.."happiness in one form or another".... P.S the open minded providers just got added to my favorites and on my world tour, see ya soon!, lol

doesn't mean she is a racist, I am not and have had a black boyfreind for over a year at one point. In this job some girls working alone wont take the chance in case you are a youth from a gang wanting to come and harm her, so she just cuts that out altogether. May be it's the guys giving you a bad name you need to sort out not the girl (i used to get around this issue by asking the guy if I could call him at work through his switchboard and yes they did it for me and I saw them). Also every single black guy I have met in the biz has a larger than average manhood. That can hurt and then causes discomfort for her seeing clients that day.

A prostitute is free to exchange or refuse to exchange sex for money with anyone she chooses.

People are also free to ridicule and laugh at prostitutes who have ridiculous rules and exclusions.

Any one who would fuck the average white TER member for money but not Denzel is IMO worthy of ridicule.

The white knighters who defend such exclusions are especially worthy of ridicule even if their feelings get hurt.

Posted By: madman274
A prostitute is free to exchange or refuse to exchange sex for money with anyone she chooses.

People are also free to ridicule and laugh at prostitutes who have ridiculous rules and exclusions.

Any one who would fuck the average white TER member for money but not Denzel is IMO worthy of ridicule.

The white knighters who defend such exclusions are especially worthy of ridicule even if their feelings get hurt.
Reminds me of the black male porn star from the 80s F.M. Bradley who used to accuse white porno "actresses" of racism if they wouldn't perform with him. So is every black male is "Denzel" level? But the whites are worthy of ridicule?

I'm glad you addressed that bit of idiocy.  The Denzel reference took his post to a whole other level of ridiculousness.

You do your thing and she does hers.   I personally prefer it if a provider is up front about her preferences.  So far I've never run into the "No AAs" situation.  That may be due in part that my "pay for play" activity is BDSM as a sub/pain slut.

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