Over the past 5 or so years, I've noted that providers and hobbiests alike come.... and then go.  A few remain on the scene... some become lurkers, some remain active, and some?  well, they just seem to fade away...

So what is the deal, is there a proper protocol for coming and going?  and how do we know if someone is ok, or they met some nefareous demise...  I would hope that were I to disappear from this group, some would wonder what happened... did he stumble into Kryptonite.... or did some stripper lass let him have his final way with her?  

Perhaps this is a downer, just that I see so many - some younger than me, some older, just disappear.... and it is getting a bit scary.

And in some many cases, such as mine, participation in the hobby is a well-kept secret from close friends and family members. many others just fade off and leave the hobby for varying reasons without telling anyone. I have seen a few that announced their "hobby retirement." But there's no protocol that I'm aware of and it's really up to the individual. As we say back here:
I'm 'Bama born and 'Bama bred,
and when I die, I'll be 'Bama dead!

But you're right, some folks just seem to have vanished. I've only been on the boards for just under a year, and some of the people who were frequent posters last December are gone, ladies and gents alike. It's  shame really, because some of these people are the ones who gave me so much good advice back then, and I do miss them. Then, of course, there are those who none of us miss.

for my favorite ladyfriends and personal friends that I've made in the hobby to be informed when I die. I did this just because I was imagining your question, and did not want to leave any hurt or worry behind....  



-- Modified on 11/11/2008 3:50:16 PM

make their way to the wake... t'would be a great event!  I want laughter, joy and song... not sadness.... I want people to remember that on occasions I made them smile...  even just to see me go.

I for one was in the hobby long before TER. I became involved in a long term very intense relationship and didn't hobby for over 10 years. As I ease back into this, I really love all available information and comradie that now exist. Having pictures to choose from, rating system and protection from rip offs and LE, what a treat.

An aquaintance of mine died in a traffic accident, I went to the wake.  In the front pew was a family, lady dressed in black...  in the back, sat the lady who'd made him happy, who he'd lived with 10 years...  

Oh, yes, the family turned the mistress out of the house within 24 hours.
skb

1- Death
2- Busted by wife, so he's now a lurker
3- Is in Jail for getting busted by cops
4- Got a prostate cancer or lost his Johnson!

Those who disappear for the first two reasons, we always find out

But if we never find out why you disappeared then one of the last two applies to you,...


Don't worry we will miss the Bizzaro man

Lost interest, got old, satisfied my itch, had my run, been there, done that, ran out of money, moved to Thailand or Amsterdam, found that soulmate/****buddy.

Really, some of us feel they don't owe anyone any explanation for what is after all an UTR activity.

I go through periods when I post alot and times when I just can't get excited about it.

But, I agree that names just disappear sometimes and never come back.

I have a "plan" in place that, if anything were to happen to me, God forbid, my Lawyer has a small list of some of my friends here that would be notified. I didn't do it because of ego but because there are a few who I think would like to know if something happened to me. Then, if they wanted, they could inform others as they saw fit.

Sometimes, people just get tired and move on. Other times, ladies in particular, retire and want no fanfare and just disappear. When that happens, especially if it was someone I knew, I would always wonder what happened.
I have had a few ladies write me and tell me that they were retiring and not to worry about them and that they would keep in touch.
Well, some didn't, but, some did and I still have occasional contact with them.

Anyway, interesting topic.

Just my opinion...
B

No way, If a starving man could get sex with the same amount of money he could get a burger, he'd choose to starve to death.

Hobby is no fun when it's legal! I have been to Amsterdam, after 3 days, you get fed up with anything related to sex, it just does not turn you one anymore, I am serious, that's why a hobbyist who can afford a hottie, would give 10 times of that money to have an unavailable woman...Yes because she is not available or hard to get...

As for Thailand, If a hobbyist on TER leaves to go there, that's great news, only a prick and a man who desires under age girls would go there. (They sell 2 years’ old boys for prostitution)

As for that special one, I believe most of the married hobbyists here are in love with their wives, but they are here because they need variety, it's not their fault, they are created like that,.. They can either go get a mistress or, come here or see providers; they choose to come here because the likelihood they lose their wife over a mistress is much more than seeing providers.

JUST MY HUMBLE OPINION

I don't think there is a any protocol.  

But I know what you mean.  Probably best we not know what has happened to some.  

It would be nice if there were a way to build a closer knit community online, but I see no way to do that in the land of a thousand aliases.

...I've been a member of this board since 2001 (albeit under a couple of usernames) and have seen more than a reasonable share of friends disappear from here with no trace.

My ATF and I just discussed this very scenario (how would either of us know if something happened to the other?) a couple of weeks ago.  But we haven't acted on it.  Thanks for the reminder - time to act...

If I am in the US when I meet my demise, and if  the contact information I have for them remains up to date, my favs and my current SO and a few folks I've met through TER will be invited to my wake. Otherwise, at least people that I have cared about and who have cared about me will be notified, and won't think I just lost interest in them and moved on. I really would not want to leave that kind of feeling behind...  there will  be a notice posted on TER and a couple of other sites for those who may remember me kindly (which number seems to shrink every time I post something LOL)

one lady, with whom I had an amazing experience.  We discussed getting together again, and then, POOF!  I haven't heard from her in a long while, even though I shoot her a note before I'm coming to town.  Her website is still up...

She told me about her best (provider) friend, and I've been thinking about emailing her, but have held of since we've never met, and I'd be suprised if my gal ever mentioned me to her.

I've almost, but not 100%, written her off.

As everyone knows, TER is not the only message board out there.  Boards exist for everything -- from chess afficiondos to soccer nuts.  Folks come and go on those boards too, with little or no advance notice.

It is just one wrinkle of the Net ...

...And they are well documented in RFC's.

But I seriously doubt that this is what people are talking about here!

I used to post much more often for those that go back 6 years or so. Still here but much more quiet and also wrapped up with work. Still hobby, but not as often and unless a truly outstanding provider, I rarely review.  
But I am happy to see some of my fellow hobbiest still seem to have  a lot to say and a great sense of humor.

--not quite dead yet
xeno

No, not spacecraft. Crying, confused and naked.