Why not ask some of her reviewer's if she's trust worthy?
I recently contacted a provider by email (there is no phone number in her profile or on her website) and, after some back and forth, we confirmed a date and time to meet. So far, so good. However, I just received an email asking for a deposit of about 50%, to be paid via Paypal. There was nothing about a deposit on her website or in her profile and she had not mentioned one while we were setting up the appointment. The unspoken assumption, for me at least, was that no deposit was necessary and, more importantly, that this was going to be an all cash transaction. I feel as if I have been misled. Am I justified in feeling this way and, if so, what should I do?
...she "all of a sudden" (it appears) wants one.
Is she getting an in call just for you? Is this a long distance to travel for her? Those are circumstances where a deposit could be justified.
Based on the information you've given this is questionable behavior. I'd have to decline and go looking for someone else.
I do not routinely collect deposits but there certain circumstances in which I would. However, I am always upfront with the gentleman before he books the appointment that I will be requiring a deposit. At that point, the ball is in his court whether or not he wants to proceed.
If you are asking her to drive a long distance or to get an incall in a really expensive area, then I can see why she may want a deposit. She probably should have told you this upfront. If you're feeling weird about it, just ask her.
I agree. A multi hour date, and your possible lack of reviews/ review site membership and other factors such as canceling dates with her in the past might be a valid reason for a deposit. However, the deposit request is often a scam.
Are you giving us all the facts because it does not seem like it. If you are looking for a reason not to go thru with the date, you don't have to ask us. It's your money.
Why not ask some of her reviewer's if she's trust worthy?
But it's a common scam. Once she has your money and done nothing for it... she can ignore you & move onto the next mark.
BTW, PayPal is not friendly towards illegal activities & will freeze associated accounts. Some have been a long time & never resolved.
You provide very little info but you make it sound very sketchy to me. Even if she offers to drop the deposit requirement - as long as you promise cross your heart and hope to die not to no-show, of course - I'd be expecting more surprises. Upsell? Worse? Rob and run? (If she does have a Profile and good reviews, that's less likely.)
Others have pointed out legit reasons why she might have added a deposit requirement. The surprise! aspect of the unfolding disclosures is what worries me. What's next?
I'll give you my paypal info, I think you should send *ME* the deposit.
I'll investigate for you, and send the money back when it's all clear.
You can trust me. I even have a comforting username!
He should send ME the deposit instead. Just check out MY user name, I am obviously more trustworthy than you. lol
and to be serious for just a second. He would be just as well off sending money to either one of us as he would sending off a deposit to this unnamed hooker. I have have confidence after reading a few of the OP's posts on other threads that he has the sense NOT to send any such deposit and that includes one to you or me.
The appointment is incall for 1 hour. I've never seen her before. I gave her contact info for 2 providers I've seen in the past. Based on her reviews, which are uniformly good, she's got her own place. I'm not sure what other information would be relevant.
In response to Durhamdrew, separate and apart from this belated request for a deposit (both the timing and the Paypal aspects), I had no reason or intention to back out. I was really looking forward to seeing her. Harborview's comment accurately encapsulates my concerns. Thanks to all for the advice.
I often require deposits, depending on the circumstances, but I make this clear on my website. Under my rates, I have a text box that says I require a $100 deposit if:
-You don't have references
-Our date will be longer than 4 hours
-You're a couple booking my time
-You need me to provide an incall space
Not only is this on my website, but I attach a PDF of the various payment methods I accept and how to access them in my first email to any potential client. Additionally, PayPal is NOT a sex-work friendly payment processor, and should never be used for adult transactions.
Based on the additional information you provided, I'd likely pass if I were in your shoes, but if you're fine with it, then go ahead!
-- Modified on 12/4/2015 7:26:00 PM
If it were me, I'd run away and find one of the perfectly wonderful women in this business who understand how it works.
Seems like someone has some cash flow issues and needs to get some bills paid NOW. Too much drama. The idea is to have fun and NOT get involved in someone else's issues.... Almost willing to give you odds that she'll hit you up for some more cash when you get there.... This does not sound like a promising hour or two... I fully understand that these meetings are transactional - but she's not keeping up her end of the deal.
Just a quick note to the effect "I am not doing a deposit - I am cancelling" and then silence - regardless of whether she changes her mind about the deposit or not....
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