In my time here in the hobby I have tried to be a genuine friend to several ladies I have come to know. Some I have had sessions with and some I have not. The main thing is I have tried to be a friend. Last evening as with times past I had the opportunity to hook up two friends with particular needs or problems with each other in the hopes that they could help each other out. Again instead of a thank-you from one friend for thinking of them and their current challenges I got a call chewing me out for not thinking of every possible negative scenereo that could arise from these two pooling their assets and talents. In the past I had a ATF who was quite fervent about referring business her way. Again I would do my best and when I succeded in a referral to her she would viciously grill me as to my screening process of the gentleman. Once upon a time I had wife who found fault in everything I thought, said and did......Hmmmmmmmmmmm maybe it is just futile to try to be helpful to a lady.
Unless you were being paid for your services to these women, you took them on under your own free will. Just because you made a few bad choices or had unrealistic expectations (I mean, give me a break...being a "friend" is not part of this business...it is up to the parties involved, for better or worse, of their own accord), don't go classifying the entire gender an ingrates. I have known several providers in the same circumstances as you, and have received enough sincere appreciation to last me a lifetime. This isn't always the case, but no one is forcing me to even be here, much less offer my friendship to them. My choice, and I live with the consequences.
That you are willing to put all women in one group based on the actions of the ones you have encountered makes me think that you may be contributing to these scenarios that you lament. I think it would be advisable for you to talk to a professional counselor regarding this, as judging by your outlook on your ex-wife and your tying it into this scenario and your impression of all women, you have some issues that need to be addressed.
and be sure you're a nice, friendly client. But you start off as a client, not a friend. If a friendship develops out of the business relationship, terrific. But that's an "if". Bear in mind this is, fundamentally, a business. Anyone who begins a business relationship wanting to find a friend is asking for disappointment. My .02 cents.
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