The word Whore, is not used to offend anyone, as I am writing as it was written. I have forgotten who the author is, can anyone help me out on this one?

Please Enjoy, as this is meant to be funny and not offensive to anyone.


1. Whores have the ability to share their most private, sensitive body parts with total strangers.

2. Whores have access to places other people don't.

3. Whores challenge sexual mores.

4. Whores are playful.

5. Whores are tough.

6. Whores have careers based on giving pleasure.

7. Whores are creative.

8. Whores are adventurous and dare to live dangerously.

9. Whores teach people how to be better lovers.

10. Whores are multi-cultured and multi-gendered.

11. Whores give excellent advice and help people with their personal problems.

12. Whores have fun.

13. Whores wear exciting clothes.

14. Whores have the patience and tolerance for people other people could never manage to put up with.

15. Whores make lonely people less lonely.

16. Whores are independent.

17. Whores teach people how to have safer sex.

18. Whores are a tradition.

19. Whores are hip.

20. Whores have good senses of humor.

21. Whores relieve millions of people of unwanted stress and tension.

22. Whores heal.

23. Whores endure in the face of fierce prejudice.

24. Whores make good money.

25. Whores always have a job.

26. Whores are sexy and erotic.

27. Whores have special talents other people just don't have. Not every has what it takes to be a whore.

28. Whores are interesting people with lots of exciting life stories.

29. Whores get laid a lot.

30. Whores help people explore their sexual desires.

31. Whores explore their own sexual desires.

32. Whores are not afraid of sex.

33. Whores hustle.

34. Whores sparkle.

35. Whores are entertaining.

36. Whores have the guts to wear very big wigs.

37. Whores are not ashamed to be naked.

38. Whores help the handicapped.

39. Whores make their own hours.

40. Whores are rebelling against the absurb, patriarchal, sex-negative laws against their profession and are fighting for the legal right to receive financial compensation for their valuable work.

Whores are fun to be with

Whores understand life better than anyone

I love whores...even if its all about the envelope !!!

and I'd add:  #41: They are honest.

"Lets go fuck some whores!!!"

("Ronny" Mund is also Howard Stern's driver & head of security)

"Whores leave after sex"

Remember the great line: "I dont pay a provider to have sex with me, I pay one to leave after sex"

Written by Annie Sprinkle
Published in 1998 in Post-Porn Modernist

-- Modified on 8/18/2007 7:20:09 PM