I understand that being Married is a socail norm. I'm not married and I'm VERY sucessful and have money. Women all want to marry me (because I have money) ....shit, I have had some providers ask me out on dates. I have heard rumers in the office that I'm gay because I'm 34 and not married and don't have kids. I don't want it...I don't need it. I'm VERY happy coming home to ME and my beautful house, TV, pool, and spa. I don't have ANYone to tell me how to do things....bitching at me and paying head games about sex (guys if you are married you know what I'm talking about). I have a lot of friends that are married and they stay longer at work because they don't want to go home to thier BITCHY wife that hasn't given a blow job in 10 years! Fuck that! I always say...I pay providers/women to leave me alone. Sure we have sex, make love, and fuck...but they leave, don't call me every five minutes, text me, and email me every f%#&%$ minute. I'm free!! I'm sure I'll get nasty feedback from guys that are married and hate me because I'm NOT in thier shoes....UNHAPPY!!!!
I know I'm going to stir the pot with this post. Just PLEASE be honest and think and cool down before you write a response. If you are jealous.....I don't want to hear from you. I want to hear real thoughts and ideas about this topic. Guys if you are married and unhappy...don't be mad...tell us how you feel. This is a place to let your thoughts and feeling out....Please...with love..FIDCUOF
Seems logical to be single is you have everything you want in life and want to enjoy it by yourself I see nothing wrong with that. After a few marriages I feel the same way . Single life is fun .
Single is the NEW married. RIght? Look around at people that are married...they don't look happy. I commute to my office and I love to poeple watch, everytime a see a couple in the car they don't look happy at all. WHen I go out to eat....some of these couple Don't even talk to eachother during dinner....WTF? I always hear...I'm married because of my kids...WOW.. that's great that you think you are staying in disfunction for your kids, however, your kids will NEVER know what a good relationship looks like. How sad i that? THink about that for a minute. Your kids see you everyday and know what you think of your wife and how you treat her...unless you are aREALLY GOOD actor.
I'm VERY happy...I have so many friends and family when I want them. If I feel like I want company..I call a friend and we grab a bite to eat or drink or go to the Laker game. If I want to get laid....I call a provider or civvie chick (fuck buddy) with NO strings attached. It's NOT really easy!
Ditto... & I've only been married once, but would never do it again. There are people on both sides that do not take care of, or give the emotional attention needed to sustain a marriage. Sometimes the wife is the guilty party & sometimes the husband is.
Posted By: Angela_Petite2
Seems logical to be single is you have everything you want in life and want to enjoy it by yourself I see nothing wrong with that. After a few marriages I feel the same way . Single life is fun .
Now, when your old and alone I hope you still feel that way. Not hating on you at all either. You are becoming the norm for the Gen Y's. Its all about you, go for it.
Personally, I want and enjoy family. I picked the wrong woman to start out with, the consequences painful. However, I have the greatest kids in the world that I wouldn't trade anything for. These kids will be bearing fruit well beyond any 401k or monetary investment I could ever make.
At my age and what I have gone through, I have a hard time encouraging anyone to get married. The laws are not on your side and you will lose. But, for great rewards, the risk are there. As for me you can have the money, i will keep my kids...
I think that is great for you...and you love your kids. I just don't see kids in my future....if so, I'll adopt one or two. Maybe get a puppy. As for when I'm old and gray...I'll have money to hire beautiful women to provide sponge baths and BBBJs with a smile on my face :
I don't think his post says anything about remaining single and happy for the rest of his life. I do see that he is a careful man choosing who he wants to spend time with sexually with no strings supporting the provider industry and I think when he feels he met the right person , or when the time comes to look for the right person that he is confident enough to find someone who he feels he could be happy with for the rest of his life. At least he isn't running around getting women pregnant winding up paying support for 18 -21 years. We learn from watching other people make mistakes and from other peoples downfalls and unhappiness and obviously , this man is an observer. Something many people aren't diving into situations , relationships too fast never taking time to absorb and observe to make the right choice avoiding mistakes. And no matter how long we might think we know someone? We never really do that takes much time and just when you think you know them ? Guess what. Relationships are a give and take and much equality should be part of a relationship . No one wants to work for something they have and lose it because of a divorce. The best situation is if both have something of substance that way no one takes a loss and I am a firm believer in pre nups.
ANgela YOU GET IT!!! You are the first person to understand what I'm talking about!! WOW.
Will I ever get married or attach a women to my hip....NO. I know I will NOT. It's NOT in my DNA...I know this and I'm VERY transparent to women I see. They kno where I stand. The funny thing is they always want to change me. I think they all want to FUCK the shit out of me and suck my dick 10 times in one day to see if they can catch me. It's kinda crazy! right?
your choices of ladies for providers according to your reviews isnt spot on either, as you mentioned "the wrong woman to start out with" meaning your wife, the mother of your children.
With the choices of ladies in theTAMPA area you definitly should do MUCH better than 5/6 's unless that is all your budget will allow is the CHEAPER end non reviewed or poorly reviewed ladies of BP.
Save your money for the amazingly reviewed ladies of Tampa area and you will find out what an AMAZING time you can really have playing in this world. )
I love my children too, but I NEVER should of gotten married, due to the fact that I dont believe I or most werent really meant to be with only one person forever. But that is for another discussion and one that has been discussed many times before here on TER.
Flame for my choice of women! How dare you!!!!!! LOL... I totally understand the thread and if you really read my post you will understand ...."more power to him!" If you read the post, you would have read I totally understand the thought process. Its not for me because I love kids.
Now, for the record..... I am divorced And ohhhhhh so fucking happy to be divorced. Alimony till I'm dead, but wouldn't trade any of it because I have and love my kids...
I totally get the whole pay em to leave. I DON'T WANT TO DATE!!! I so get it, but I don't wantwhat is chasing him either. I have had beautiful, trophy women....no thanks!!!!!
Now, having that here, totally different story. Don't bust my chops because I started off at the bottom shelf, I've had top shelf and left me wanting...if you don't get that then you should look inward and think about it.
world and their stories get to you. Fact is, there are very many happily married couples but they find ways to keep it that way...being selfish is the main reason marriages fail, and that goes for both parties. I love being a wife personally, but I also like my own space. If I could find a guy I only saw on the weekends, I would stay with him forever and the sex would always be new and great. It's the redundant day to day, up your azz bs that I can't seem to get past.
London XXX....that s correct. THe Day to day BS in your face shit is what I'm talking about. YOu said it....it's day to day....that means EVERYDAY or almost everyday. NO way...That's NOT for me and most poeple. However, 90 percent of guys and women are in it
OK... I agree. see we can agree on some things. However, I'm NOT looking for it. If it falls on me or over me for some reason, I always know I don't want it. I have made up my mind in advance. Does that make sense? Kinda strange I know...It's like If I'm at a party and people are smoking pot and ask me to smoke with them...I say no right away. I have no interest in it...before and after they ask me to smoke. You know what i mean? No disrepct to anyone on these boards...I'm just telling you how I feel.
Single not looking, single looking, married happy and married miserable are all options for a guy, as well as no sex to great sex if married.
I have several friends that knew they never wanted to get married, and a few couples that are married that never wanted kids. I wanted to be a Dad and am one of many happily married guys that hobby for the trill and variety. I love my kids and spend as much time with them as I can. Sex is good although after many years with the same woman you sure know what your going to get, and not get.
I feel for anyone in a terrible relationship, especially if they don't have a good option to get out of it, know a lot of couples like that. Know couples that went through miserable divorces and some life got better, some not. We all know all these types.
Your situation is one you chose and it sounds like it is awesome for you. I'd love a "hall pass" to go live like you for a week but that only happens in the movies
You did say.." Sex is good although after many years with the same woman you sure know what your going to get, and not get". Have you ever sat your wife down and asked her to change it up a little. Maybe she thinks the same way. Maybe do some role palying or use some toys....some sort of change in sex. Have you ever thought about it? I'm sure you have, however, I think it's time to go home and try. What is she going to say? NO...at least yu tried...rght? She is not going to hate you for it....
You know where my next kids are likely coming from? Known Sperm Donor registries. When you can have kids with women of your choosing without even bothering to marry ... what is point in all the BS that has been heaped on marriage?
Stay the course!
Yeah, I realize that's a reversal of my earlier position. So?
I had previously done the anonymous thing. But the problem is that you never know who gets your DNA.
With Known Sperm Donor options, BOTH parties have the power of choice.
Obviously, there are contractual issues. In most cases, you do AI. In others, you do natural insemination by agreeing to sex a certain number of times during her ovulation, etc. (following mutual STD tests, of course).
It is, IMHO, a great option that makes the primary advantage of marriage obsolete. Lets face it -- if you have money and you marry a woman either she figures some way of holding you hostage (for example by dangling separation from kids to whom you are attached) or gets to walk away with gobs of money just for being pretty. Forget that!
...in whatever form that may take. personally, i could not fathom an existence without my Husband/Master/Best Friend/Love of my Life/Guiding Light. my world revolves around him and after more than 11 years, i still get butterflies in the chest when it's nearing time for him to come home from work in the evening. every day we have spent apart has been torture for me, i just long for him that much. and we don't need to constantly talk or be engaged in activities together...i am quite content just sitting at his feet while he is at the computer, just soaking in the joy of his presence.
truly i did not mean to write that as mushy as it came out, lol. i am not trying to say that lifetime commitments are some fairy tale. a successful relationship is WORK, work you have to put in everyday, but for me it is immeasurably rewarding and i wouldn't have it any other way. perhaps the only truly terrible thing i can say about a relationship like this one is the fear and dread i have of losing it all one day. whether through death (my Husband is about 20 yrs older) or him having some sudden change of heart and leaving me. after having this, knowing that it's true and real, losing it would be unbearable and i honestly do not know how i would go on.
but just because that is what brings peace to my own mind and heart, does not mean that you or anyone else requires the same. what we should all refrain from doing is making assumptions and generalizations about the other side.
...our relationship is far from "traditional" in the modern sense. we do not believe in the concepts of monogamy or egalitarianism within marriage. that relieves us of much of the strife and heartache of typical relationships straight out of the gate.
I can relate to your views. I have never been married. I don't intend to ever get married. All of my friends are married. Every single one. I get BS from them every time I see them. Here is the kicker though. Right after they tell me that I am missing out on something, they start to bitch about their wives! Bipolar is an understatement. They definitely seemed happier single. I am 32, and have lived alone since I was 17. I am set in my ways. The big difference between you and I is that no ladies are chasing me. I make decent money. I am not rich. I work very hard for my pay, and the idea of giving it and my heart to an SO is absurd. I am admittedly that selfish. Some people are breeders, some are not. The idea of creating a life overwhelms me. I am not ready for that. Being 32, I don't think I ever will be. I call that being responsible. Others call it being a coward. Take your pick. I have also seen a Grandfather or two cast aside by an ungrateful family that just want the inheritance. So I'll stick with your idea of bubble baths and bbbj when I am too old to wipe my own ass. Same thing at work here. Those who do not know my secret hobby, all think I am gay. I am a decent looking guy with good hygiene that isn't married. I have to be gay right?
Not having to care for anyone has its perks. You are not accountable to anyone and no one is accountable to you. There is a certain freedom in that. But despite being single having its perks, I wouldn't trade you places. I am quite happy being married.
You see There is perks being married to a great lady as well. Single is great when life is good but not so good when it isn't. I have been struggling with cancer since July. In October there was a point my odds of beating it was less then 50% as my body had a very negative reaction to chemo. It was the fact my wife and kid needed me that keep me fighting and gave me the strength I needed to endure. I am not out of the woods yet but am doing much better. Because of my family I am still here, of that I am sure.
But it isn't just the big things that add up. When I have had a hard day my wife often gives me a quick massage or a hug and I feel better. It is being able to share my feelings with someone that loves me. It is seeing her eyes light up when you tell her good news or she shares your concerns when you tell her bad news. It is wanting to be a better man because your wife and child need you. Those things are priceless. I would never give them up.
Now it is true I do sacrifice a lot. My time is never just my time. I have to hold my wife when she has a bad day. I have to forgive her of the small and large wrongs she may do. I am accountable to my wife and my child. I have to think when I do something "How does this affect my family?" I sometime have to do things not because I want to but because my wife or child wants me to. I have to live my life for my family and not just for me. Guess what I wouldn't want it any other way. My wife is my best friend, my lover, my hope, my ally, my partner, my cheerleader, and in short my world. She is worth nearly any sacrifice as she would sacrifice nearly anything for me.
I know you don't get that and that is OK. Married life is not for everyone and it has its ups and downs. It is real work and real sacrifice. It involves taking a huge risk. Thing is if you got the right woman it is the most valuable thing there is. That is why it is so damn hard. Nothing of true value is ever cheap or comes risk free. Some just are not willing to pay the price or take that risk. For them it is best to remain single. Nothing wrong with that. I am glad your choice is working out for you, but I am also glad just glad not to have made that choice for myself.
i am 30, also have a heated indoor pool and sauna. live in an ocean front property high rise. Successful, educated. have a 1,000 hour cosmetology certification from one of the harder schools {blaine} now regis is it that bought it out?] any hoo. Then a massage education, Herbalist certification from untied plant savers rosemary gladtstar. alot un official knowledge of weellness fitness but no schooling in it. just hours of endless independent research and studies. A resume including waitressing at all the best fine dining places on newbury . ok well two of them!!!!!!!!!!! And alot life experiences to have landed me in a peaceful mature mindset for my young 30. I also am so disinterested in having some one here at end of day, i also love my appts and love when they l;eave and dont call me!!!!!!!!!!! Thats too bad the women in office want u for money, maybe they should quite and escort and make there own money and not marry a guy for his moeny . only to not blow him so he has to spend it on hookers and make him miserable takn his money just cuz he cant deal with being alone????? yeah i have to agree the fail;ed institution of marriage,,,,,,,,,,, to have a catholic priest who may have just molested an alter boy % min ago stand over me and say what i have is sacred,,,,,,,,,,i dont get it,,,,,,,,,,so that the guy can then go and cheat any way and lie and spend money that should be spent on kids on hookers, cuz the wife is prude that wont bang him or bring new broads home for him to bang, cuZ she stuck upo or just uoptight, thats one thing i like about the muslem religion, the men are alowed multiple wives, what drama could bbe avoided and marriages saved if conventional marriage allowed for this,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I agree with you, i am so happy to come home to myself and have no one to answer too,,,,,,,marriage totally not for every one,,,,,,,,,,,
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