This may have been broached before, but I've been curious how providers are able to avoid the development of romantic feelings with clients, particularly with those ladies who themselves have ATFs. Given the highly intimate nature of the hobby, it would seem more than likely to have happened. I'm intrigued by how these feelings are either avoided or professionally dealt with. Even more interesting would be those providers who have an established romantic life. Curious to hear any ladies thoughts and if they have experience with this and are willing to share...

How do you trust a prostitute that uses a sponge to soak that nasty possibly HIV or HPV laiden shit pretending they ain't on their period. Have you ever gotten a hoe's period in your mouth? It's gross. This homeboy gonna stay far away from dining at the Y. I ain't no CUNT DRACULA

...If she accepts it and then gives you $20. back, that's proof of countertransference.

BTW, you should be blacklisted simply for using the word "countertransference" on a fuckboard.

When money is exchanged, it is an unwritten contract that there are no feelings. If she is willing to give up the money for a geniune relationship with him, then there may be some real feelings there. But to start a relationship on a "fantasy" is ridiculous. It can happen, but there aren't that many exceptions to the rule.

TER clearly states you wont allow any type of posters trying to offend others... how come your posts keep getting posted??? You were bitching about what some providers play on their phones when you go see them... you made reference that they would play rap and such... have you read how you express yourself? a rapper at least has talent... you're rude and and have no class.  

we have feelings just like you do. Our existence is as legitimate as your reasons to seek providers. We aren't less of a human being than you. To be in a successful romantic relationship and do what I do is near impossible, based on my experience. I really am glad for girls who have managed to find an understanding and loving guy who accepts us for who we are and not what we do.  

Your posts have become a constant diarrhea of hateful drivel.......

Gangsta, has presented the opportunity for a female rapper to spit about menstruating in a tricks mouth.

Ok let's get this straight... one more time... Who's on First, What's on Second and I Don't Know on Third... LOL

Yes this has been broached before. Plenty of time in fact. By lot of curious noobs just entering the hobby...

you meet someone

I have friends who left the hobby to be with ATFs. One is living with him and raising his kids (guess he preferred his provider to remarrying after divorce), and the other manages one of the ATF’s businesses in OC. So yes-it can and does happen…but the Providers I know wouldn’t go without a significant commitment from the ATF… and that takes $$$

I know I have sex but the sex is for the john, not for me. I have clients that are very nice men but I am not physically attracted to them. The sexual component is for them and as long as I do the job I am being paid for and they are happy and want to come back, that is all I require as far as job satisfaction.

No, he wants the ladies to share their ATF's ?

I have one of those too, Alyssa. It's a wonderful feeling really. He has similar feelings, and we both know it can never be more than what it already is. I won't be here forever, and he's married to his best friend.  

Dear Ms. Hille:
The underlying question is how well have you mastered the art of compartmentalization for business and emotional self preservation? Once you have mastered that then being functional in this business will be easier and optimal

Sometimes it's just a job, and sometimes I'm in lovvvvve.

WTF is countertransference?..is that like swapping your love juices?..just askin..

they are symptoms of a biological state - not objective reality....

You require reviews and I don't have any so we are both safe...LOL

Why would I want to compartmentalize my emotions?  
I use them in my sessions... they love it...

...lunch box with the image of your favorite heartthrob on it...

I do require a way of screening you, but, as we both know, reviews are only one way of doing that.  I also don't always write a review.

I don't disagree in principle with your view about not letting emotions sweep us away, but I think you might be giving emotions less than their full due.

It is easy to rationalize away any actions that are based on emotion because they are not logical, but then what do we become?

I think there are times to listen to the emotions more than the rational side, lest we not develop fully in that dimension.

Or, as I like to say:  You can't make an omelet without cracking a few eggs.





-- Modified on 9/5/2014 6:11:16 AM

If all of the "hoes" that you so nicely like to call them are riddle with disease why the fuck do you fuck them???? Oh and I for one LOVE the sea sponge.....me and hubby made use of one just last night.........and being a female hobbiest I have used them with providers,and THEY have NO problem going down on me......those little sponges make things pretty much vacuum sealed!!! Maybe you should find a new hobby......like painting or knitting.

The problem is the "all or nothing" mentality that it appears many fall into, where the slightest bit of chemistry or mutual affection is interpreted as THE ONE to fall devotedly head over heels for. There's a broad spectrum of affection, and you can even find yourself caring deeply for someone without wanting to POSSESS them. The ladies who do this well have figured out how to decouple the societal expectation of commitment from simply enjoying casual fun and even deep affection with another. Some may even find it liberating.

"DiscussionBoardAdmin" not so much.

It's like when a certain unnamed ex moderator and I co moderated this board, I was always the "good mod", right??? lmao

Yeah, yeah, I know, back then we had "bad mod" and "worse mod" Tell me something else I don't already know.

Appreciate the thoughtful and honest responses. This would be an interesting research project if one could get it past an Institutional Review Board. My hypothesis is that it's seldom just about the physical interaction for most; otherwise why not just chance it with a streetwalker? It's the connection that provides a lot of the interest on the client side and I'd assumed it (the connection) was an enjoyable benefit for the ladies. It seems that it can't be exclusively about the Benjamins, but where the heart goes comes the risk.