Happy Valentine's Day! I need some advice on love. My lover is sending me mixed signs and I'm very confused. One minute he says he wants to be with me forever the next he says it's just about sex. He said he wanted to break up yet calls me all the time. Is he just crazy or mean or am I crazy to think he really cares? Why does he keep coming back and acting like he cares if he doesn't (sex isn't always involved)?
none of us know squat about your BF, and he's baffling the hell out of you. He probably baffled his mother, and changes his mind from time to time.
That's just like you & most of us, and it's NORMAL. Life changes, and our feelings change, sometimes from one minute to the next, depending on the situation.
You gotta look at what you need, and what you see with him, AS COLDLY AS YOU CAN. If what he says doesn't line up with what he does, then you aren't speaking the same language, and god knows that happens all the time.
Sounds to me like you gotta TELL him the words aren't matching the actions and neither is very steady.
Don't think guys can't fall in love with you because of sex. But if the 2 of you can't work together, get away from him and find somebody you can work with. Because both of you, sooner or later, are going to be dumpy, smelly & broke, and if you can't build a history that holds you together, you got nothing.
Put him on notice that you're playing the field again. That might mature him about three years to eight years old. Just enought to begin to understand responsibility, at least a little.
Men like this pray on women with low self esteem who will tolerate this childish behavior. He knows he has a hold on you so he continues to act poorly.
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