A sperm donor, that is.... we had known each other a couple years, she wants to have a kid, and asked if I would do this for her...i was flattered, floored, extremely turned-on.... because it would involve a week of incredible edible unadulterated mad sex.
If you have sex with her -- protected or non-protected -- and she has a child (or children) that genetically test to be yours, you WILL be liable for child support for the next 21 years.
Roughly, according to current guidelines, that is 1/4th of your income for 1 child.
Your ATF, according to a variety of court rulings, CANNOT exempt you from this because courts have consistently ruled that it is a right of the CHILD's, not hers; and she has no standing to surrender it.
So as long as you are cool with giving your ATF a quarter of your income for the next 21 years, I say go for it!
"...according to a variety of court rulings, you CANNOT be exempted from this, because the courts have consistently ruled that it is a right of the CHILD's, not the parent, and he/she, has no standing to surrender it."
While the courts have indeed said that John Galt, they courts have also consistently said, that the exact opposite can take place, and have consiistently allowed two parents to agree, that one can surrender not only all their parental rights, but also their parental obligations, including child support.
Why do you think surrogacy, adoption, and donation of sperm/eggs is thriving?
Men donate sperm to sperm banks all the time, are they held financially responsibly for their offspring?
Women donate their eggs, are they held financially responsible for their offspring?
Biological parents consent to adoption of their offspring, are they held financially responsible for their offspring?
If done legally and through proper channels, it can be done.
And on another note, if the female was hypothetically married, at least in some states, it would be the husband, not the "sperm donor" who would legally and financially be the responsible party, regardless of his consent to said process, such as hypothetically in this case, or his lack of consent, such as in an affair, and his wife became pregnant with another man's child.
Of course, in general, egg and sperm donors are anonymous -- though not always.
And you are right, through adoption both rights and obligations can be terminated.
But, and I hate to sound overly cynical, in such a circumstance he is putting a LOT of faith in the woman.
There was a case in New York a while back that was similar to this. She was able to get the contract invalidated ten years later and nail him for back child support.
A wise man would pay the best lawyer on the planet to draw this up; IF it could be done. And even then he wouldn't count on it. All that would have to happen is the woman changing her mind once the baby was first born. If she does -- he's on the hook.
Yes -- according to some genetic studies, fully 10% of children born to married couples are the result of cuckoldry and the husband becomes obligated to support the other man's offspring.
However, for those who do paternity testing at birth and refuse their name on the birth certificate; this is not the case.
There is a bill in front of one state legislature now that would require paternity testing of all newborns before putting the husband's name on the birth certificate.
So the days of men unknowingly supporting the offspring of infidelity may soon be numbered.
I think the provider is putting a lot of faith in her client. What's to stop him from trying to become the sole guardian on the grounds that the mother is unfit because of what she does for a living?
in class there was this adorable but also quite hot blonde PYT who was not single. she was taking classes part time and had a really unusual occupation. she was not a provider, unless perhaps part time. she exuded a primal animal sensuality and was smart as a whip, truly bright.
anyway she desperately wanted to get pregnant. her SO couldn't get the job done. for some reason they decided i decided i had an appealing set of genes. (this was when i was younger, better looking, had not had my little stroke yet, and hadn't fallen into the bad habit of "blogging" on discussion boards.)
so they put the question to me. they didn't want my participation in the child's life or my money. timing could be that i would be bask in the US after pregnancy could be confirmed. so it seemed really like a safe bet. i could indulge my undeniable lust for the young lady and escape scot free.
i said no, for reasons i'll keep to myself. although i don't regret it, your story puts me in mind of this tremendous compliment that i received and i think he or she would be mid teens about now......
and i found her on facebook.... she and her SO are still together but not married and have a daughter... looks like something happened about a year after i left... good for them...
I have children and grandkids and they are the most incredible influence in my life. I could not knowingly create a child and then just walk away. That person is part of me and to not be involved is unthinkable to me.
how fucking romantic is that? Couple questions just for fun.
She's your ATF, known her for a couple years...just so happens I have one and have known her for a couple years. Do you know her actual full, real, name. Do you know her real address? Favorite color? Does she know yours?
Not that any of that is really important, but some people like to have a realtionship built on a bit more than sex for money before they commence breeding!
Please, tell me this is a troll post, as I would really hate to think that anyone is stupid enough to consider doing this to the kid that will be born out of this nonsense! :-&
"...some people like to have a relationship built on a bit more than sex for money before they commence breeding!
And some dont.
Thats the beauty of it, for those that participate as a sperm or egg donor, and for those that seek out their product. You get paid for your donation, no relationship. You pay for your product, no relationship.
this is just breeding for the sake of having a kid (because she wants one). She's not seeking a product. She's not going through screening, testing, etc. She's doing nothing more than offering BBFS on a provider/client basis for the sake of getting pregnant. There is now an unbreakable bond, the kid! He may want to be more involved in it's life later on, and she tells him to hit the highway, or vice versa. I waited until I was 30 to be sure I was financially stable, and ready to settle down with kids so they had the best shot at a good life, education, etc. No that's not for everyone, but I don't think this plan is for anyone!
Sorry if this sounds a bit harsh, but before I help bring a new life to this screwed up world, the lady would have to be a little more than my favorite "HO"!!! I think you are just over simplifying this whole process. I also think the OP is a complete moron for even considering this!
I would ask her if she were willing to marry me. Raising a child requires two parents, and it would best if you both cleared the air, and understood the long-term implications of this. The responsibility is enormous, far beyond BBFS for a week....
Would it shock you later to find out her rap sheet had charges of child molestation, attempted murder, larceny, escape from mental institution, etc. etc.?
This whole idea is just as crazy on so many levels it would take weeks to explain it all.
If you have no thoughts of participating in this child's life, think again. It's one thing to get the sperm from a bank, but for her to know, and actually choose the "donor", is an entirely different story. This would be the ultimate case of letting your pecker run away with your wallet.
Additionally, since she is your ATF, will she continue to be your ATF after her child is born? That's "her" child, not yours. Will you be able to continue to be her client, with absolutely no feeling of responsibility for this child? Sounds pretty cold to me, on your part, as well as hers.
If you make the wrong desision, it's the child who will be at risk of being on the losing end.
Seriously this got to be a fake post or you Mr. OP are the most naive and confused hobbyist I have come across so far.
How do you believe this is ever going to turn out positively? The fact that you described your reaction to this offer as flattered, floored and EXTREMELY TURNED-ON clearly shows that you haven't any freaking idea of what consequences this could have and that you clearly are thinking with your little head. Besides the dangers of BBFS itself, having a baby is such a huge undertaking with so many facets. And do you really believe that you donate your sperm and then she disappears with the kid and never been seen again ever? That's so unlikely it makes me winning the lottery look more plausible. This will be with you for a long time and I mean really long time. And are you planning to stay a client with her, when she's pregnant and then has the kid? Or are you ready to lose your ATF? Have you thought about the fact that she might be doing this to bind you to her for the rest of your life or at least for a very long time? Are you ready to settle down with her? Start thinking with your big head for a change.
By the way this comes from someone that has gotten his ATF pregnant unintentionally at one point in time, so I kind of know what I'm talking about.
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she exuded a primal animal sensuality and was smart as a whip, truly bright.