*A call for civility, moderation, and just letting the damned thing go sometimes.*

We're all adults here and we should be able to agree to disagree respectfully.  

Wishful thinking  
When have you ever see a troll not willingly not have the last word
The problem with disengaging is that then they go off topic on each other  
Even if the rules of staying g on topic were enforced would help a little.

But I think it's fair to say I generally shy away from it. And I do think this board has been damaged by some of the endlessly argumentative threads about how many hookers can dance on the head of a pin.

-- Modified on 5/3/2026 9:35:48 AM

And I have been guilty of doing it. I do feel bad afterwards when I realize I have taken it too far. I can get caught up
In the moment, especially if I feel attacked or it’s something I am passionate about. But the funny thing is I am often arguing because of everyone else reading it and not the person I am arguing with. And yet, everyone else likely didn’t read it from the start or checked out well before I let it go. I have been trying to do better and will continue to work on it.

And well said, as usual. I can, and need, to do better. Reminders like this are always helpful so thank you Claire!

that I and so many others have left the site, or have vastly limited their participation. TER could be a great site to interact, if we had mods who would call out and stop this and other negative behaviors (misogyny, misandry and generally mean behavior).

"Bang some hot chicks."

I agree, if you could show a bit more control it would be greatly appreciated

Huzzah! Go forth and prosper! 🍆

Thank you so much for this! I have suspected this was the case. I certainly have found myself at times wanting to throw up my hands and be like, why am I here when it’s so toxic?

Thank you for the appreciative words! And for considering how everyone can do better on this. I figured you for a reachable one ❤️  

We love a ray of positivity and civility!

And I love the pig analogy.

-- Modified on 5/3/2026 1:29:42 PM

Those that have to have the last word. If not they'll be perceived as weak and have been and that they've just been bullied. It's the you punch hard but I'll pinch harder...way too much testosterone.
Bet they're like that in real life so I doubt they'll change here.
Just Gotta know when to say when...

You are so right Claire. So many times I read a post that devolves into ridiculous trolling. It seems like those people do not realize how others see their petty, juvenile bullying for what it is.  I wonder how many providers reject their requests to meet based solely on their board posts?  
I was a member here before TER went dark.  After TER returned and so much had changed.  Not nearly as much entertainment here and much more of the dark stuff.  These same people complain that there are fewer and fewer ladies participating here and cannot understand why that is.  
Perhaps looking in a mirror may give them the answer they seek.

I used to post on a politics board regularly.....this is a massive circle jerk compared to that!

It is truly exhausting.  

Claire, you certainly are a succulent breath of fresh air and I will remind myself of you when I see a keyboard bully start some trash talk. Thanks for bringing calm to my Monday morning 🌄 ☺️

Huh? Im not the one with the uncontrolled outburts.

Is this a here we go again moment?
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Did either of you read Claire's wonderful, eloquent and poignant Original Post?

Trolls always show their true colors and end up outing themselves. lol.
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Great job Claire!

are members here who are not polite to other members??!!!    I had no idea!!!!     I'm shocked, SHOCKED, I say!!!  

I think this is part of being alive in 2026. The internet brawls are intense but it's all love in the end.

Im not the one that goes on long winded diatribes so point that shit elsewhere pal

This is the place to go:

I make liberal use of the Ignore feature and highly recommend others do as well.

The fact that there are spaces that are worse doesn’t mean this one couldn’t be better. I’m sure there’s a name for that logical fallacy.

Thank you, I really appreciate your perspective as someone who has been here for a while – I genuinely wasn’t sure whether it had always been like this or whether there had been some degree of deterioration in the discourse.

If they are the OP, there is an action button below their original post. If they are not the OP, click on the title of any of their responses on a the board, often the place where they may trigger you. That will bring you to the page that features their response and has the same action button. When you click on the drop down arrow on the action button, one of the options is Ignore User. Select it and done.

I'd say the whole point of ter is probably not attractive to "babes". We compare and contrast womens sexual services and looks with as much objectivity as possible without flattery. At least that's the idea.  

If you look a bit closer you'd see that TER, while reviews are a core part, is hardly a site that was "a review site for guys". What about the Provider Only Board? Why give providers with profiles and accounts free limited VIP? Why even let them have any say over the profile or any reviews on TER?

He says, “I’d say the whole point of TER is probably not to be attractive to ‘babes.’” That’s not just wrong, it’s wildly off base and frankly, delusional. It’s obviously not the "whole" point, and it’s not even close.
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Beyond everything you have already mentioned Jensen, there’s also something called “Buzz Boards.” Last I checked, men have zero say in what gets posted there. And yes, brace yourself Rocket, women can actually market themselves that way and even make money from it. Eeeeegads! lol.
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Women also have the ability to RAP a post, contest a review, respond and refute a controversy they may be embrolied in on their regional (or other) board and can contest client's thoughts and ideas on virtually all the boards here.
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What Rocket is really describing isn’t TER as it exists, or as it has existed for decades, as he’s describing the version he wishes existed instead.

FoxyFuckPants was a volunteer mod and, I'm told, a very hot provider from the Atlanta area. In recent months I even asked Admin why they continued to attach her name to the Manual since she was long gone and I might be the only member to know who she was. They declined. Anyway, she did a damn good job.

My original statement was

This is a thread about arguments and the lack of civility that some of these arguments encourage. You’re trying to make it a thread about monger consumer protection and are already arguing with people who disagree with your take. Why not create your own post rather than hijacking someone else’s?

My response to you is the same. Lets use your EXACT words. "the whole point of TER is probably not attractive to ‘babes.’”  
And then Jensen and myself proceeded to show you the MANY features here that are attractive to women. lol.
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So again you are wrong. That is NOT the "whole" point of TER" but I dont expect you to concede a point, or learn something, as we all know that just isn't your thing.

Inserting words I didn't say and put them in quotes is pretty low.

I can acknowledge a mistake as i quoted you from memory and should have cut and pasted. I own that. My bad. Full stop. But my reponse to you is the same regardless.  
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And now looked at what YOU just did. You went from using the term "the whole point of ter" previously, to now, using "the point of ter." Can we take that as an admission you went too far originally? Just own that and we are good.

Thanks for your response!

will get no argument from me.

Ive been on the internet for 30+ years (and I'm still under 40, ha) and rarely do people change minds when arguing. People in generally don't change mind often, even in real life. As such, the purpose of the posts isn't really to change someone's mind.

You mean like where I said I take accountability for my actions and where I apologized in the first post because I'm clearly guilty of arguing?  

Its blatant from your first sentence you are using an AI agent to create your responses.

In deference to Claire’s wishes, I think it’s best if we just let this topic rest and make an effort to be less combative and less argumentative moving forward. I hope we can agree on that. I’ll leave it there, and you are welcome to have the last word if you would like.

People need to let shit go sometimes. The constant one up man ship.

Well yeah the guy was owning the argument so best you stepped away before stepping in it even more than you were

Great thread Claire, thank you!!!  Your original post said what so many of us on TER have felt for YEARS!!!  It has illuminated two things:  1.)  A majority of the replies completely agree with you.  2.). A LOT of the guilty parties have proven, upthread, the very reason for your post and still can’t act like mature adults.  Anyway, kudos Claire for your very topical and relevant comments.  

Yup this all reminds me of junior high school .
Some people will like you some won’t , some will forget about you or not.
Be kind, be courteous , nothing wrong with a point of view or two just keep it cute …..
And stop making everything an argument .
Thanks Claire for posting !

So many times I hit a subject that sound interesting but reading down it just becomes a jumble of bitching from well know posters. Its a shame as some guys and girls give great input into the original subject. For me and I suspect many others are not willing to read through all the bitching and petty stuff others interject into the conversation and simply move on to another thread. Many years ago TER was a great resource, The regional boards had lots of interactions .  I think  the fear of being jumped on by one of these cowboy keyboards has diminished the conversations. Just my thoughts, I am sure I will feel the the response from the cowboys quickly .      

1. I’m more likely to listen and consider the viewpoint if someone who is congenial, a good listener, and who acknowledges my concerns than a prolific pugilist.

Before I start with my long winded statement....

Hes usually correct though and you can tell hes just trying to get through to some of the dunces on here.

There IS a name for it! I had to look it up though.

AMAZING thank you 😘

Many years ago I saw a gent who was a TER member but did not disclose this info before our date.
On the general board he would get into arguments and kind of had a smart ass know it all online personality.
In person he was a completely different very nice guy than he was here. I asked him why did he act like that here. He laughed and said it is fun to ruffle some feathers see people's reaction. I told him he should not disclose his handle you never know who reads this board quietly lurking.I told him the act that he puts on is exhausting. SMH