The ABC's of Cunnilingus While every body is different, a few basic things remain the same:
-Share a shower together before you begin so neither of you have to worry about unpleasant tastes or odors. -Ask your partner what she likes. At the very least, she can say things like "harder" or "slower" or "more circles." -Fill your own mouth with saliva first. Never touch or lick the clitoris with a dry finger or tongue. -Know where the clitoris is but don't dive straight for it. -First try gentle kissing and licking around the upper thighs and vulva. -Tell her how good she looks, smells and tastes. -Think variety. If you repeat the same motion, your partner becomes temporarily insensitive to it, so be sure to vary your stimulation. -Let your hands roam. As she becomes more aroused, insert a finger or two. Once she is highly aroused, you can stimulate the clitoris more directly. -Gentle insertion of a finger into the anus can send a woman into paroxysms of delight. If she doesn't like it, she'll tell you soon enough. -Continue to fondle and hold her as she orgasms and after. -The clitoris has more nerve endings than the entire penis. Be gentle. -Unlike men, many women enjoy strong stimulation while having an orgasm. Keep it going until she begs you to stop.
These suggestions should give you a start, but experiment and see what you and your partner enjoy. The greatest tip of all is to relax and enjoy yourself. Enthusiasm goes further than even the best of techniques!
If the lady is on her back while you are engaged in the feast, one elbow supports you and you have the other hand free. Assuming the slow approach has been used and passed and she's really going (that is really wet and open) you can slide a finger in and massage the g-spot while lapping around and on the clit. If she's going hot and heavy the g-spot is engorged and easy to find.
I usually position my love du jur on her back with her hips on a thick pillow. I then have easy access to everything from her anus up. Once I have the major and minor labia nicely engorged, and lubrication running well, I move my attention to the clit, and ease my index and middle fingers into her vagina, with my palm up. My chin fits into the heal of my palm, and my pinky can be eased into the anus.
My hand can then be moved gently in and out, providing stimulation to both the vagina and anus. I also move my index and middle fingers back and forth. This technique can be used to provide direct stimulation to the G spot.
When I wish to move away from the clit, I simply rotate my forearm down, so my hand and arm are positioned as if I were carrying a pocketbook. This allows access to the delicate area between the clit and the vagina.
Of course, I remove my hand when I wish to rotate through areas other than the clit, and its immediate area.
I can, and have, maintained this position for periods longer than an hour, and even then, have only stopped at the request of the object of my affection, not because I'm tried or uncomfortable.
Naturally, these techniques must be modified from lady to lady. Oddly enough, some prefer no fingers in their vagina, claiming it's a distraction. Others say the three finger approach makes all the difference.
Well, thank you LOVEROFWOMEN. I think your description finally demystified what was inferred to in LA Law, and I had read somewhere, but didn't fully grasp the "mechanics" of it.
Excellent tips, Mara! I would add only this: spend some time giving your woman an excellent massage first, darkened room with candles, some wine and for best results: the twelve minute version of The Rolling Stone's "I'm Coming Home," - from "Aftermath" - on the stereo - has worked for me every time!
I've tried quite often positioned on the side, i.e. at 90 degrees angle from her body. Usually I am on the floor by the bed rather than on the beditself. The sensations are quite different and I find it works quite well when the lady's clit is very sensitive and cannot handle a "frontal attack". Ever tried that?
The absolute best way to learn to perform cunnilingus is to watch a woman pleasure another woman. My experience is that women have a unique sensitivity to each other that goes beyond the physical. Watching them communicate with their eyes and body language is amazing and sensual. Then again, men have special attraction to women and they bring a whole different approach which another woman can't duplicate. I'm certain that the more I watch and listen the more I will learn. If I'm lucky my women will continue to teach me--I'm an eager student.
When I was in the corporate world and did a lot of training I took a course about how people learn. In this course they stressed the fact that some of us learn by seeing, others by reading, some simply by listening and most of us learn by doing or practicing. One thing is for sure none of us are born knowing everything. I think that to really learn a trade, technique or whatever you have interestin wanting to be the best at if you use all the the information out there you will master that which it is you wish. Something well learned will never be forgotten. Kisses & Licks......... Mara of San Diego
...over a period of years by my wife (see description above).
In an effort to continually improve my technique, I asked one of my civilian girl friends, who's bi, to let me watch her and her girlfriend. She agreed, but warned me not to pick up too much from the observation. She explained that what I do to her gets her off more consistantly -- and more intensely -- than does her girlfriend's technique.
My point is, while observation is valuable, there's no substitute for good, old fashioned instruction and immediate feedback.
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