Lately it seems, with each new provider I see, after we just had a great time together, they always ask: "Are you married?"

I'm not sure why this question gets asked, but my best guess is that maybe they're looking for a boyfriend.  It happens too often to be coincidence and I don't think its just idle curiousity.

Any takes on what is happening here??

The first time I visited a local lady she asked me that same question. Then she asked if I had a girlfriend. I doubt she wanted a date... I am pretty sure its just a common question.

Nah, they're just making conversation.

A more likely scenario is they're looking for repeat business.  Married men make up the majority of most providers' clientele.  The perception among providers is that married men are "safer" than single guys.  In my experience, most providers aren't looking for boyfriends among their clients.  Sorry to rain on your parade.

    But this is all about fantasy anyway, right?  So, if you want to think most providers want you to be their bf, go with it. Heck...for all I know, your take may be correct.  Maybe you are God's gift to women. Hey.....whatever floats your boat.

         

-- Modified on 4/30/2002 7:42:00 PM

they are more likely looking at a married guy as someone who may become a good regular that won't become emotionally involved. I would expect that a single guy who gets along great with a lady is more likely to fall for her and want the realtionship to be more than it is. From previous discussions, it doesn't seem like most providers are looking to find a boyfriend from amongst their clients. Like I said, I'm no expert and I may be way off base here.

pt

based upon some of the discussions on the local board. Jeez, you just never know, do you? LOL  jk, MBSP, you posted while I was writing ...

pt

But only the important matters.  

Just kidding, p_t.  You the bomb!

-- Modified on 5/1/2002 7:51:18 AM

However, on those rare times when they are longing for a possible boyfriend they will probably make that clear to you (they won't keep you in suspense).

LC

-- Modified on 4/30/2002 8:20:20 PM

Southpaw is right-on!  I usually ask within the first 5 minutes though not at the end.  Life experiences are different based on marital status and therefore so is your conversation.  If you were to perceive someone as being married you might tend to make some assumptions that aren't necessarily correct if someone had never been married etc.  So for me it helps give some direction when meeting someone for the first time.

entirely too agreeable lately and take this opportunity to disagree with all of the above, based upon the presumption that you are all idiots with a collective IQ slightly below room temperature.

I feel better now.

so, how is everyone anyways?

LM

I have subtily gleaned phone numbers from working gals, in Europe and here (actually, most of them were euros too)(but that's my type).
I plan on connecting with some of those dreamy young midwest 1k models in ny soon (if they're real) and back of my mind I'm hoping they might just pass along a number.
But then, I look like Brad Pitt.
Actually, not entirely. I have a little Keanu in me tho.

The lady is just making conversation. Trust me, the odds of them looking for a boyfriend from a client is slim to none. I have dated two lady's who were escorts but I didn't know it when I met them and was never a client of their. If I was, it is very doubtful anything would have ever came from anything. They are not even making the connection of "if he's married he may be a repeat clients". The lady knows that if the guy likes the service he will be back.

Truth be told it is the married guys who get more obsessed than the single guys. As has been pointed out in numerous post, this business is about fantasy. The fatasy lasts as long as you've paid for. Some married guys have issues at home and use the escape of an escort to at least put the home front behind them for a few hours. Sort of like a junkie taking drugs. When the drugs wear off or the session ends, the problems at home still remain. That is when the married guys go off the deep end looking for a repeat of that fix. And just like drugs, the more they see the lady, the more they want to try to intensify the relationship.

Single guys are more apt to try to hit every new face in the area. It just seems that the lady friend's I've had have had more problems with married guys than single guys. Single guys seem to keep it in perspective more unless they have bad socialization skills to begin with, hence the reason why they are single. Aome married guy go into it first because they tell themselves they don't want the emotional attachment but crave something new. The next thing you know they are comparing the action at home to the fantasy they pay for.

Let me let you in on a little secret....... Escorts DON'T go to bed in the sexy lingerie they see you in. that is like the business uniform. They  wear the same flannel PJ's like your wife. LOL If most guys knew the reality of their escort friends, it may just take some of the luster off. Sexy does not equate to comfortable all the times.

Back to the question, I think it is ideal chit chat. They are not making any assumptions one way or another. Many lady's ave families too and are just looking to connect. Sharing an intimate moment with a stranger is not as easy and comfortable as these lady's make it seem no matter how long they've been in the game. The question is sort of an ice breaker to establish a common ground. The one thing I fault them on is that the lady may not realize how uncomfortable that question may make a guy. If he is feeling somewhat guilty, the last thing he wants is for the lady he is about to get with to bring up his wife. Talk about a buzz kill. its even more from that reason why I think its just idle chit chat.

Since your nuts are numb after a good time, you need some conversations to reload....LOL.

I agree that I doubt highly that it has anything to do with them looking for a boyfriend... I ask sometimes, and sometimes I don't. Sometimes clients wear their wedding ring (thus I don't need to ask to know!), sometimes they'll take the wedding ring off... and have this big indentation on their finger where they usually wear it LOL!  My ONLY purpose in ever mentioning it to anyone (and I only do that once in a great while...I already KNOW that most of them are married... special circumstances), is to let them know that I do not care, or judge them, or think less of them because of their choices.  I want them to feel *comfortable* with me and know that I will accept them as the person they are... no need for facades... and it is so much more fun, hot, erotic, when you can lose all self-consciousness with someone and just BE with them.

Hugs*
Nicole

I'm single 'cause monagamy is unnatural combined with the fact that I don't like to lie 'cause I'm terrible at it.  I have no functional memory for what I said during Conversation X so in Conversation Y I am bound to contradict it.  I have idetic memories of experiences that meant a lot to me, but NONE of what is going on day to day.  (I, largely, don't care.)

Providers:  Trust me!!!  People like me will not become a problem!!!

I think they just want to get to know you a little, but I find it annoying because it will cause me to respond with similar questions for her, and "they" tell us that you shouldn't try to get real personal with your provider.

One time, at the end of a session, the provider asked me what I was doing afterward and also mentioned that she was going to get some coffee.  Now THAT sounds like she's starting to ask me out!