In my future. I think I can give my heart to someone. But I'm too morally flexible to get married, unless it had a fringe benefit like the girl being a foreign national or rich. If she's just a cute nympho I'll keep her my gf.
I am filing for divorce and wonder if "The Hobby"
helped nudge me in making that decision.
Don't worry ladies. Even though I am worth 1/2 as much,
I plan on dating providers twice as much. (Happy Face)
"F" marriage and relationships.
Does "The Hobby" Help or Hurt Your Marriage?
Your thoughts if any?
and overall poor self image..
In your case divorce can only hurt you...Who is going to feed you, clean you, and wipe your dimwitted lame ass?
Better move in with your parents ASAP..
-- Modified on 9/20/2013 6:54:46 PM
That sounds just like something that I might have said.lol
BTW lose and Atlanta clinches 0-0 in the fifth, are you nervous yet?
putting too much pressure on Zimmermann (P) to pitch... On top of that The Troll posts..
Now I had my dinner and 7 runs in Bot. 6th already.. 
-- Modified on 9/20/2013 7:51:17 PM
I thought you were dead on.
Now I had my dinner and 7 runs in Bot. 6th already..
-- Modified on 9/20/2013 7:51:17 PM
I just wanted to bust his chops a little about Atlanta clinching, well maybe clinching tomorrow at least. lol
and I am usually the one being "harsh" especially where it comes to SPOTY finalists. Curly was stealing my thunder. lol
Got married way too young (20) yeah dumbass me I know it. This provides me a way to scratch the itch for strange hot tail without emotional baggage. Like a lot of guys I love my wife and cherish her for being the mother of my child but the horn dog in me just couldn't be held back any longer. Good way to blow some steam off without hurting anyone or myself. And it's done wonders for my confidence some of the great sessions I've had that were too good to be faked. Also picked up a few tricks along the way to spice things up. Just last night the SO and I had a pretty good romp and she said "where the hell did you learn that?" I just grinned and said the Internet.
So yeah I think it's helped things out.
If your wife is out there getting strange on the side too, behind your back, does that double the stability of your marriage? 
What's good for the gander should be good for the goose, right?
But, surely, there are wives out there telling themselves that fucking the pool boy is "saving" their marriage. Whether their hubby would agree......? haha
-- Modified on 9/20/2013 1:01:29 PM
but then again, how many wives want to think about it either. I am sure a forum dedicated to cheating wives would have a slightly different take on this subject.
I do know I had a GF once who used to go to the male strip club "with the girls" on occasion. She always came home all worked up and would fuck my brains out. Whether or not she "sampled any of the merchandise" I have no idea, nor does it really matter all these many years later, but it does raise the question. lol
o what you're gonna do. It doesn't make anyone a bad person. It makes them human.
But own up to it. This seeing hookers makes me a "better husband and father" thing really stretches credibility
Are you Lond*n now? You can't say fuck? Sheesh.
being gentile. ...So sorry. I don't give a FUCK....lol...
Do what you're gonna do. It doesn't make anyone a bad person. It makes them human. But own up to it. This seeing hookers makes me a "better husband and father" thing really stretches credibility.
Comparably, it also kinda sucks that I see providers, but I'd be divorced and not around for my kids if I didn't.
Turns out I'm built for monogamy in terms of love, emotional connections, and family... but not at ALL built for monogamy in terms of sex.
So, "better husband and father," nope, not at all. but better than fucking up my family over some dumbass fake romance with my secretary? Yes, absolutely.
I would agree that it's better to be alive than buried in the backyard.
OTOH, I do question the value of staying in a marriage that is only viable if you're lying to your partner on a regular basis. Kids are surprisingly observant. They are also surprisingly resilient. And they're not nearly as oblivious to the dynamics of their parents relationships as many seem to think.
Divorce is not the worst thing to happen to children. You are your children's primary role model. What would you like them to learn about relationships
How can we know what the true nature of someone else's relationship is, and judge why they stay in it? Thus, I don't judge anyone else who stays in a relationship that I would leave.
Personally, I've been married twice and never truly cheated. It's just not in my nature. Still, I don't judge those who do. I have only seen providers while I was separated or divorced. But that's just me.
I'm not saying marriages aren't complex. Of course they are. And people stay married, or don't, for all kinds of reasons that make good sense. But that doesn't mean that having sex with other people, behind your partners back, makes a marriage better. Again, that last part stretches credibility. For me.
I wouldn't care if my partner was having sex with other people. I damned sure would care if I found out after the fact. The sex is irrelevant. The lying is not. And if my parter then had the balls to tell me they were doing it to make our relationship better----there wouldn't be a relationship left to make better.
It may make staying in a marriage easier, for the person doing it. It's even a very pragmatic solution sometimes. In a few situations I think keeping sexual dalliances a secret is the right way to go---just make sure you're a damned good liar.
But, generally speaking, if having sex with other people behind your partners back made a marriage stronger, there wouldn't be much need to lie about it in the first place. Instead of figuring out all kinds of stealthy ways to keep it a secret, husbands/wives would be saying: "hey honey, let me tell you about what I'm doing to make our marriage better!
sex with your wife after marriage? May be it is a implied understanding or morality in certain societies, cultures or nations but it is definitely not universal
I wouldn't care if my partner was having sex with other people. I damned sure would care if I found out after the fact. The sex is irrelevant. The lying is not. And if my parter then had the balls to tell me they were doing it to make our relationship better----there wouldn't be a relationship left to make better.
It may make staying in a marriage easier, for the person doing it. It's even a very pragmatic solution sometimes. In a few situations I think keeping sexual dalliances a secret is the right way to go---just make sure you're a damned good liar.
But, generally speaking, if having sex with other people behind your partners back made a marriage stronger, there wouldn't be much need to lie about it in the first place. Instead of figuring out all kinds of stealthy ways to keep it a secret, husbands/wives would be saying: "hey honey, let me tell you about what I'm doing to make our marriage better!"
They do not, and never will, know that for a couple hours on the first or second night of daddy's infrequent business trips he is fucking a pretty young thing who he paid to come to his room.
I'm generally gonna pass on parenting advice that comes via a p4p forum
here may nothing there for the kids to observe. There may not be any reason for telling lies daily because the subject doesn’t come up.
Disagree with Kids are resilient part. They are resilient alright, in the wrong way in single parent homes. So, there is merit to OP’s point of view.
Moreover, having mistresses on the side is pretty common in other places but not in the US with hypocritical morality
Yeah, there are a lot of assumptions here. The assumptions that a) my kids will ever have any idea what is going on, and b) would be better off if I left, are the most insane.
The weirdest thing about this thread is that opining on the importance of monogamous marriage is apparently so important to so many (apparently unmarried) clients and providers. It's like it's a mythical place where this sort of seediness ought not happen. Reminds me of four blindfolded guys describing an elephant by touch. It's pretty silly.
Here's what I think about marriage (as somebody who has been in a great one for a decade). It's fantastic. It is good for kids, and it's really nice to have a partner for life. I love my wife, love having sex with her, and love the idea that we'll be sitting on the back porch together in our 80s.
But I still like fucking other people. 
The two things have nothing to do with each other. Monogamy wasn't even in my vows, though I didn't think about that when I wrote them.
In the same way that people occasionally need to be reminded not to fall in love with providers, I'd remind the folks advocating monogamous marriage on a board for clients and providers that this isn't match.com. I'm seeing providers for sex, not love.
There may nothing there for the kids to observe. There may not be any reason for telling lies daily because the subject doesn’t come up.
Disagree with Kids are resilient part. They are resilient alright, in the wrong way in single parent homes. So, there is merit to OP’s point of view.
Moreover, having mistresses on the side is pretty common in other places but not in the US with hypocritical morality.
Love, Marriage and sex are not the same. If it is the case then, when couples can no longer have sex (can happen for many reasons) the other would leave. In many cases we (at least the empathetic) stick around and take care of the other.
So, I get your point.
I've had a couple of friends of mine who used to be male dancers, they not only were straight, but they got more pussy for free than I do paying for it.
Sorry to burst your bubble that all of those guys that can get all the pussy they want for free, actually want to.
I also had a friend once who was a Chippendales dancer, the great thing was he was in love with his GF and never fucked around on her, so some of them had to "settle" for me. It never bothered me a bit that I was "second choice" lol
Fair enough. My experience differs. I know 4 guys who have danced in shows / on bars and 3 are gay. That's statistically significant, albeit a small sample. They're ripped and except for the whole guy butt-sex thing I'd trade bodies with 'em in a second, but my small sample is definitely, on average, and quite flamboyantly, gay.
If I were living with some guy I no longer wanted to fk, I would leave and let him live in peace. I would no expect anyone to stay with me knowing I am no longer attracted to them, and all the excuses in the world won't justify it. It's really that simple. You don't cheat for another person...you do it for yourself. For me, it would not save my marriage as it's already gone, but it would maybe save my sanity to the point that I could stomach living with that person day in and day out.
Most people are bitter because their spouse no longer wants to have sex with them, and that's the wrong attitude. It is not another person's fault they are no longer attracted to you or sometimes, even in love with you. People change.
Absolutely.
No been there and that sucks. But as long as everything is upfront, sure. Look sex is not love or loyalty. Sex is just sex. She has her fun and I have mine and we both come home to to our martial bed and to each other. Now these clowns lying to there SO are lying to themselves if they think it is helping their marriage. Truth is they are setting up their SO for a world of hurt. How can that be helping a marriage? It can't. Deep down I think they know it.
-- Modified on 9/21/2013 12:42:16 AM
HAHAHAHA
I'm not Married. If you're Married and doing this Hobby, remember at some point you will get caught. It may be sooner or later. But eventually you will get caught.
Or, like millions who have gone before you, via careful planning, use of appropriate technology, and always making smart, risk-based decisions, you will not be caught. It's really not as hard as it seems.
A) p411 so no provider can out you
B) google voice for messages and texts
C) no hometown dates (only when traveling) and no incall
D) well-reviewed high-end providers only
E) private browser on your phone, iPad, whatever (to check "B") that dumps all data on close or screen going dark
D) bail on anything that feels remotely sketchy
Many old men have gone to their graves with this secret. You can too.
And because of this I probably won't be to be honest. I just don't see anything I have to gain from any sort of committed relationship. Don't get me wrong it's great when it works out like in the case of my parents, but I'd be kidding myself if I said that's what I want. I know at my age I don't think I have the capacity to feel that kind of love even though I know it exists. I have a few providers who I see more often than not and have even offered OTC time. But yeah I mean the only thing would be the prospect of progeny, but I can just make a donation to some place for that and hope my genetics have transversed into the next generation.
I love -- and love fucking -- my wife. She's hotter than at least half of the providers I have been with and she totally gets my desires and kinks and hits all the right buttons. And yeah, she's an awesome mom to our kids.
The problem is, I like to have sex with other people. A lot. I just love sex with hot, near-strangers. I'm okay with realizing that about myself and I'm in my late 30s, married for close to 10 years, and it doesn't seem to be changing.
So...
I could either:
A) overcome my impulses (so far, no luck... I think I'm just made this way)
B) have an affair (likely to destroy my marriage and family)
Or
C) p4p
I like C. A lot. With as many beautiful women as I can cram into a lifetime.
What if my wife is of the same mindset? Well, if she is as great at keeping it from my line of sight as I am at keeping this from hers, I have absolutely no objection.
Love and sex are not the same thing.
-- Modified on 9/20/2013 7:39:23 PM
but a very honest pig, and I can't find fault with any of your reasonings, not that you'd give a fuck if I disagreed. lol
FWIW I am a pig too, just not a married pig.
I am absolutely a dirty pig. I do, however, think I'm much cleaner than the dirty pigs who have affairs with real names, emotions, regular lying, dates, and all of that. Vastly better for all concerned that I get a little visit from a different, but always gorgeous and well-reviewed, no-strings, no-names girl a few times a year -- who discretely shows up at my hotel room when I'm traveling for business anyway, and then leaves with no drama or nonsense.
FWIW, I never thought I'd feel this way, or that love and sex had so little to do with each other, until I'd been married for most of a decade and I realized I was thinking about having an affair that would have probably ended my marriage, and been unfair to everyone.
Your comment was just funny, but for single guys and providers who are critical on this front, I'd only suggest that it's pretty hard to know how you will react to a decade of monogamy until you've tried it.
Your (and everyone else's) decisions are exactly that, YOURS. How the hell am I supposed to know if I would do it any differently if I were in the exact same situation? Society at large is judgmental enough, do you really need the same kind of treatment here?
Now that doesn't mean that I won't occasionally make fun of others choices, but when it comes right down to it, I get rather testy when people stick their noses in my business uninvited, I try to remember that whenever I am tempted to do the same. As long as children, livestock, or large appliances aren't involved, it's just not my place to judge, and I can make exceptions for livestock and large appliances, I do draw the line at children however, or anyone else doing this against their will
Dammit! I thought you weren't going to judge me!
You know, that gasket on the door of that Samsung....
Usually, I'm so happy when I've had a fun session with a provider that I'm still feeling great for several days. During that time, my relationship with my wife is better than usual.
After that, the "drop" sets in--when I come face-to-face with the realization that my real life can't come close to my fantasy life--and my fantasy "girlfriends".
Then I start counting down the days until the next time I can get together with one of my fantasy playmates.
Neverending cycle...
When I was going through my divorce, seeing providers made things more tolerable at home. The first time with a provider was the first time for sex in two years. As soon as I touched her body I knew I needed it more than anything.
Years prior, I wouldn't have considered it, as it would have been a violation of my principles I'd set for myself. When my ex turned into a drunken, morbidly obese, insult-slinging bitch, it was time for me to re-evaluate my principles.
Like RokkKrinn, I'm happy as can be for hours or even a day after a session. Then I start thinking about the next one.
If I were wealthy, I'd see her every other day. Or maybe every day.
In my future. I think I can give my heart to someone. But I'm too morally flexible to get married, unless it had a fringe benefit like the girl being a foreign national or rich. If she's just a cute nympho I'll keep her my gf.
... Perfection in terms of a mutually rewarding relationship, and the biggest drama is usually scheduling a rendez-vous
Being single has it's advantages....