Besides the recent period Vampire thread.  

It must've been because we were in doggy.
And, no, I didn't.  Marry her.

Until I come back to the island?

After so many years, you have heard it all, or so you thought....

...... her client sat in the closet handcuffed and a vibrator strapped to his dick while he watched us fuck through the small gap in the door..  
She offered to split the donation, it was a hefty one. I didn't take the money, I was having too great of a time. We were both really turned on by the creepiness of it .  Went on for 2 hours.
I left before she let him out. I never saw his face and don't know who he is.  She told me that he didn't fuck her  after and he was really happy with the scene.

NSFAL.   Not suitable for after lunch.  Yuck!

Every one of those requests actually happened, and came from escorts I knew.  
I actually complied with all of them too. The car ended up staying in my yard for 6 months. 🙁

😍😍

I'd do it again in a heart beat!  Damn, it's got me all ..........    now!  

It was a very long time ago, with a regular of mine.   I was over at her place and we were just getting started when her doorbell rant.

Not exactly a weird request, but one time I had an appointment with a Latina gal in Houston who hosted at a private house, along with several other girls.
My gal was running late so had an appointment in the bedroom and I had to wait on the couch with the others watching Spanish soap operas..

...be the strangest request to me. No, I don’t want a human toilet, no I don’t want you to use your tongue as tissue, and no I will not be squatting over your chest and mouth! I do not judge, but this is NOT for me.

And Mick, are you exaggerating the 2 minutes to 2 hours?

I was a 3 minute wonder when I wanted to be, up till I was 50. Then I ripped my diastasis recti in half and now I can go for hours (when my cardio training is regular).
So no, she was paid for a 2 hour tease and denial session and we could have gone longer. She and I had great chemistry.

I get lotssss of requests for weird shit.  
-toilet play golden showers. Peed on guys
-guy wanted me to "pretend" to take advantage of him
-extreme ball busting I squeezed the shit out of them!
Then put on my heels and kicked him hard and stood on his body while his laying down. The bottom of my heel pinched his skin.  
-make him cum then feed it to him. Gross.
-client wanted me to use him the wholeee hour as a furniture. Sat on a chair and put my feet on him and watched tv and texted the whole time. THATS IT. Easiest 300$ I've ever made haha.  
-sweat fetish. This weird dude just wanted to watch me exercise and get sweaty. He jerked off while watching me exercise. It was so bizarre but easy money.    

but you are not really into kink.

"BUT I am pretty open minded to fetish/Kink  as long as I get compensated extra for my service"  

... while she writhing while asleep. Hoped she was dreaming of me LOL ... so I woke her up ... she said she was (right answer) ... respectfully complied with her request

Hahaha, I have a couple of photos from that one. I had to go back and check .

I have a client I see regularly who wants me to snap for an hour, but I have to use both of my hands not just one, he wants me to keep my clothes on and just watch me snap..sounds easy but imagine snapping non stop for an hour lol

The epic "Golden Shower"...Had to drink so much water before those dates...um clamp nipple clamps on a gents nipples and twist them...I could go on put hey my motto is "Its All About The Gent" of course if the request is within my acceptance of doing LMAO

That woman is a legend. I have no words.. Brb gotta go touch myself to your story!

NSFW = Not Safe For Work  

So out there that is has to be true.  There seems to be a theme here of guys wanting to be crapped on.   I guess that is just life.  Some of us got crapped on by the ex-wife, some of us got crapped on by a girlfriend.  Amazing that some of your Johns haven't had enough of the real life experience that they had to pay you to experience it.  Actually, maybe it was cheaper for them for you to crap on them than to experience the real deal.  Sad Millenials.

-- Modified on 10/6/2017 8:38:46 PM

Mystery solved! So you were the one who ruined my caiman boots.

To earn the easy money for just unloading on a trick.  You'll get there.  Why give it away for free when someone will pay for your shit.

I wish a lady would say that one of my requests was her strangest.  But alas I don't think it will ever happen.   LOL!

I was wearing a suit when we met, then in our room as our clothes were slowly being removed.....she ask me only leave my tie on while we were naked.....Ok. During our erotic tango, she would pull on my tie to draw her closer to me as we kisses passionately. It was fun yet unique.

Still baffles me to this day!! It was a couple years ago and I was in SF. It was late evening when I got a text, usual routine screening. After He had been cleared he he asked if he could call and discuss specifics with me. After I pick up the phone we started chatting and he seemed completely normal. He asks how much pain I can handle in the realm of 'Sights, sounds scopes and needles' His exact words. So I'm weirded out but ultimately curious on what he was gonna say next. He proceeds to tell me that he would like to strap me to a table and put a speculum in me, open me up and dilate my cervix. WHAT THE FUCK?!?! I tell him absolutely not and he sounds like a serial killer. So he offers me $800 bucks for the whole ordeal and tells me I can bring anyone for security I would like....  LOL UMMM ?? Definitely not! I quickly declined and hung up but its still the weirdest request to date!!

I've enjoyed some pretty strange encounters, but you just reminded me of one I did NOT enjoy.  The gent asked me to insert a large vibrating sound into his cock and kind of f*ck him with it until he came.  It was a curiosity for me, and he talked me through it so I felt reasonably confident I wouldn't inadvertently maim his man-parts... but - even so - it was a disturbing sight, and I don't think I'd do it again.

I enjoyed playing you and your tie!!  That was so much fun!   I remember that night very well, smiling as I think of....)

I have brought cigarettes: Pall Mall, Marlboro, and Newports.  

I have been asked to put on a rubber glove and fist a guy.  Another guy asked me to take a Tupperware bowl into the bathroom and s%$# in it and put a lid in it and give it back to him.  Because of that story Dr. Drew called me the "Tupperware lady" on Loveline.  Probably the strangest request by far was the guy eho asked me to swallow live goldfish and earthworms because he had a fetish about being swallowed whole.  I respectfully declined that request. LOL

Early in my hobby experience a provider told me about a hobbyist she'd seen that creeped her out with his request. Their first date went just fine. But for the 2nd date he offered to double her hourly rate IF she'd soak naked in bathtub of ice water for 15 mins. Then lie on massage table, on her back, motionless & silent, as he fucked her. She declined his offer and stopped responding to his attempts to contact her.  

A pretty young lady had fallen thru the ice while skating and died, trapped under the ice.  A guy at the morgue was fucking her body and she woke up.  This was probably not the first body the guy had fucked, but this young lady came back to life and woke up.  I'll be that freaked him out.

and then there is "weird, disgusting, and funny as hell" lmao. I think we all know which category this one falls into. lol

I don't know if this qualifies as a weird  request from a provider, but it was definitely unexpected. I was a few minutes away from arriving at her incall when she texted me asking if I could stop by the drug store down the street and pick her up a new razor. She hadn't "mowed the lawn" recently and her razor just broke.

I have been crapped on several times by life.  Don't need it from anyone else.

Had a provider show up at my hotel in SD as arranged.  
We met in the bar and really clicked  
She had a day job and only saw me while in San Diego.
She started staying over and we went to a sugar baby deal.
The final night I saw her she called to me from the bathroom.
She wanted to deep throat me while she did her business.  
And she had several other similar requests.  
First time she'd shown any interest in anything like that.

I've had a couple memorable experiences. I had one client who liked to roleplay as a vampire. He had me stand in front of a window looking outside, then he came over behind me and pretended to bite my neck. I had to pretend to faint, and he carried me over to the bed and spent the remainder of the hour lightly touching me over my body.  It was actually quite sensual and really enjoyable.  

I once was contacted by someone who wanted to have sex in the same bed as his wife. He said she was completely incapacitated and couldn't move at all. He was angry at her because he needed to provide her complete care for many years, so he liked to have sex in the same bed while taunting her and he wanted me to join in with making fun of her. I never turned something down so fast. I was so broken hearted for his wife.

Is it really possible to fart on command?

The dreaded "wet fart" lol

I flush used condoms down the loo always

Throw them in the damn trash. All kinds of bad things happen when you flush them. Look it up!

because they don't taste good.  

was in a touring band...woman who i spent time with was a "Anna Kendrick" lookalike for 8 yrs or so...had 6 yr old daughter from guy who beat her...she moved away...12 yrs later back in town...we hang...introduces me to her daughter..looks the same...and asks me if i would have 3some w them...she wanted her daughter to learn how "a gentleman"should treat her and not get beat up...spent nervous weekend/active wknd w both of them...weird having mom watch me fuck her kid...weirder having kid watch me cum in her mom...i still see the mom!...heard that her kid has kids and is not so happy

.... I know what can make me pretty farty WITHOUT sharting lol.

As a pro dominatrix I get LOTS of off the wall requests from clients, but one odd one that always stands out is one of my clients who has a huge cake fetish. The last time I saw him he brought a whole bunch of plastic used when painting inside your house. We covered all the carpet and bed in my bedroom. He brought two giant sheet cakes from Sam's Club and a bunch of little Debbie snack cakes. I Blindfolded him and smashed the cakes all over his body and then chewed up pieces of the cake and spit it in his mouth (his request). I then jerked him off using the frosting. He was in heaven and promptly rebooked.

That's funny but I bet you gave plenty of guys an idea on that one.

Although Little Debbie is over 60 years old, she still looks a little too young for me.  
.
Bring along a Bimbo or a pretty Hostess cupcake, and I might consider the food fest.
.
EDIT: Bimbo is Bimbo Bakeries (stock symbol BIMBO) which is the largest  bakery company in the US. Hostess is what remains of the old Hostess company and is on Nasdaq as TWNK.

-- Modified on 10/25/2017 5:24:38 PM

Yes, I was worried about that too!!  It was not as bad as I thought it would be. We took a shower after and I was worried about the cake clogging the shower, but it went down fine as well! Mmmm.....now I kind of want some cake!!! lol