Here's a fluffy little article that translates the little things we say in civie relationships.  Most are pretty predictable.

Buy it got me to thinking that our hobby has it's own set of niceties that we say when we really mean something else.

I'll kick it off:

"I have to check my calendar and get back to you." means:  No way in hell are you going to hear from me.

Anyone else care to share?

I always like to talk about that South American chick that permanently friend zoned me. Either she was around for free expensive food or I made the wrong move somewhere. But I still believe the latter.

..."When I look at you time stands still" does it really mean "your face would stop a clock"?

actually say what we mean...or is it mean what we say. Either way, it's too much work for me to always talk in code, so I'd rather just be upfront about it. Some people respect it and some just can't handle it lol.

It felt like being probed by aliens.

Curves in all the right places... A little extra padding (not that this is a bad thing mind you)

I actually thought I was reading a review while I read that senator

Provider said "I've got to give you a big cock discount"....means "I can make you an ATM till you figure it out".

We're already late. Can we fucking go now?????

I can't even imagine that.  

'A' all the way I'm afraid. And I hate to admit, but yes, it is genuine, every single time. Ya see, I selectively choose who I want to meet out of those who contact me. That goes for who I want touching me as well as who I want to touch. It's not the other way around I'm afraid. I choose to play with less than 1/2 of the guys who contact me on a weekly basis, including one just today. Something wasn't 'there' for me, so it's a no-go. Sorry to burst your bubble here lol. But I'm picky, and so is my pussy

Sorry to burst YOUR bubble  

Posted By: _Taylor_

'A' all the way I'm afraid. And I hate to admit, but yes, it is genuine, every single time. Ya see, I selectively choose who I want to meet out of those who contact me. That goes for who I want touching me as well as who I want to touch. It's not the other way around I'm afraid. I choose to play with less than 1/2 of the guys who contact me on a weekly basis, including one just today. Something wasn't 'there' for me, so it's a no-go. Sorry to burst your bubble here lol. But I'm picky, and so is my pussy  
   
 As far as B...that couldn't be more far off base lol but did make me giggle.  
 I see one or two gents, sometimes three per month, not daily lol. And that's max.  
 I don't watch TV, I have better things to do like piss people off on here. It's much more entertaining  
 I dry clean one or two things a 'year' at best if I do at all lol.  
   
 Thanks for playing. That was fun. I hope you are a satisfied customer now  
   
 T xx  
   
 Btw, have we met? hmmmmm  
 

happy to see you come out of your hole for a brief shining moment

speechless

LMAO

And since no one ever "lies" on the Inet...I guess I'll just have to doubt the authenticity of your statement on getting those "voluntary" photo's.  Why any fool would send a pic to a stranger here would certainly cause me to question their discretion.  

Posted By: _Taylor_

happy to see you come out of your hole for a brief shining moment  
   
 I said nothing about the boards except I like posting on them or was it pissing off some 'select' posters. Oh well, either way, that's neither here nor there lol.  
   
 Am I selective, yes...I've been told...very. Butttt....since I don't get 'pics'???? Guess again there hot stuff. I get more 'voluntary' photos sent to me than you could imagine.  
   
 Ok. I 'guess' the balls back in your court.  
   
 T xx  
   
 (btw, are you lurking now????? lol) That's creepy Dr. Who.  
 

-- Modified on 3/20/2015 5:39:33 PM

but it does happen. I don't think they are fools, but don't worry, you got your point across lol. I delete it immediately, but it is nice to see who I'm going to meet sometimes...after all you do think I'm 'paranoid' all the time LMAO.  

Posted By: Dr Who revived

And since no one ever "lies" on the Inet...I guess I'll just have to doubt the authenticity of your statement on getting those "voluntary" photo's.  Why any fool would send a pic to a stranger here would certainly cause me to question their discretion.    
   
 So yeah...I doubt you get any pics.  And just suck it up when the door opens.  That's OK....I've heard from many gals they do the same thing  LOL  
   
 Lurking?   Maybe you can define lurking in this context.  Seems this board is full of lurkers    
   

Posted By: _Taylor_

happy to see you come out of your hole for a brief shining moment  
     
  I said nothing about the boards except I like posting on them or was it pissing off some 'select' posters. Oh well, either way, that's neither here nor there lol.    
     
  Am I selective, yes...I've been told...very. Butttt....since I don't get 'pics'???? Guess again there hot stuff. I get more 'voluntary' photos sent to me than you could imagine.  
     
  Ok. I 'guess' the balls back in your court.    
     
  T xx  
     
  (btw, are you lurking now????? lol) That's creepy Dr. Who.    
   
   
 -- Modified on 3/20/2015 5:39:33 PM

We swim in an ocean of lies. Nothing is ever as it seems, and we as often believe in lies as distrust the truth we hear. Ideally we would try and be truthful to ourselves, but alas we often end up believing our own lies, which is the saddest part of the whole business.  
And yes, I'm as guilty as anyone on both scores.

There are lies...and then there are lies...if you know what I mean.  

... and the rest is history, so to speak lol.

So??? What are you telling me the rest of the time?

You must have quite the rigorous screening process to weed out only guys you want to touch and be touched by. How are you able to make such a precise determination? Care to share that?

We are taught, and teach our children, to lie from birth. I’m not saying it’s always a bad thing. There is some value in learning to say “Mom says I can’t play” instead of “You’re an embarrassment I don’t need to be seen with,” or “Fat? You? No!” instead of “You passed fat about 100 pounds ago,” or “Thanks, I already ate” instead of “Hell no, last time I tried your cooking it tasted not quite as good as duck dung served with a diesel fuel reduction.”

re: Thanks, I already ate” instead of “Hell no, last time I tried your cooking it tasted not quite as good as duck dung served with a diesel fuel reduction - lmao

Who amongst us has the balls to answer, "No honey, it's your fat ass that makes your ass look fat"???

I am betting the guys that can answer yes to that are all very happily divorced like me. lol

"Honey, does this dress make me look fat?
Answer: "No, dear, it's your huge ass that makes you look fat."
And after looking at a lot of American chicks' asses this weekend (music festival) there are a lot of fat little asses out there.
Some of them are pretty cute.

When you've been here longer, you'll realize that "Taylor" claims to know much, much more than she actually does.  Put another way, Taylor really, really "knows" a lot.  But it's almost all wrong.  That doesn't stop her from giving out bad advice on any board she's on.
Just last week she had to be schooled by the host of the Newbie Board for giving argumentatively wrong advice.  She has not been seen there since.  Or here, since her last melt-down a few threads below this one.

you'll see if and when we meet Mr. Twister. But that's up to you handsome, not I

There are a hundred different lines that are all correct. I'll tell it my way, and you tell it yours. Now please start drinking, you make so much more sense when drunk.

You gave the punch line away in the first line, then repeated it.  Now, go ahead and double down on being wrong.  You seem to enjoy it.

Here's my thought: let's have BSCTaylor pick whose version of the joke is best!  Since she's always wrong, this means whoever she chooses automatically loses.
Of course, being brilliant, she'll probably try to game the system by picking as the winner which one of us she hates more.  But then we'll know that, which would also be fun.
Minnie?  Paging Minnie!
LMAO!