I nominate the following for the best story.

I remember reading one where a man describes a visit to a provider he had been seeing "for years".  He said thay had finished early and they talked about the progress of her chemotherapy.  He noted that she still "looked pretty good".  

I was never more touched...Harry

That is a nice story.  And, by the way, nice "The Third Man" alias!

In no particular order:

1. Anything that reads like a Harlequin romance novel.  Over dramatic and way too light on the stuff that matters.

2. REVIEWS WRITTEN IN ALL CAPS.  HOW DISTRACTING

3. Poor grammar no paragraphs and run on sentences it would be nice if people realized how hard it is to read them we can't tell when one sentence starts and the other ends its very hard to read you get my drift if this is you you may want to invest in a english class cuz it will make you a better communicator thanks.  

4.  Long, winded reviews. Geez, it's a review not a term paper with a 20 page minimum.

5. Too much explicit detail. Some things are better left unsaid. We'll get the point without having to hear the particulars of your penis enlargement or an explicite narrative of how much semen you produce, etc..

6. Too much useless detail - unless it has value to the review most folks oculd care less about the traffic report on the way to the appt, what was had for lunch, what was on TV during the appointment, the weather outside that day, etc..

7. Lack of detail. "great girl and I had a blast.  I wasn't dissapointed at all and will definate repeat". Leaves too much to the imagination.

8. Any review that combines two or more of the above characteristics in it.