Having recently broken up with my girlfriend and feeling horny, I've been checking out these reviews and am planning to dabble in the "hobby".

But I'm having second thoughts. Mainly that I'd get addicted and it could end up hurting financially. Also, after getting used to sex with the pros, the bar will have been raised and when I eventually get married, sex with my "civvy" wife will be a letdown. This will causing me to return to a pro, screw up the marriage and lead to all sorts of problems.

So basically, does this hobby cause more harm than good in the long run? I'm semi-joking here, but not really

Finally, if any hot, new providers want to build up their reviews, I'd be willing to help you out by reviewing your services if you comp me (just kidding

could go either way depending on how your head is screwed on... it definitely takes the sexual pressure off of your civvie relationships... what can be a good thing too because then you can take the civvie side nice and slow and think about what you're getting yourself into (minus the little head thinking for you when the big head should be in charge)...

Sometimes this has freaked out potential civvie GFs because none of the usual IOIs trigger the standard horny male small brain response... and a lot of these civvie chicks can't process the idea of a guy who isn't driven by sex urges...

So I figured out as time passed and I found myself more and  more in control of my life because of using the pros, just the opposite of all that guilt and finger shaking Laura Schlessinger and equally off base politically correct moralizing crap lectured by people who don't have nothing, nada, not squat in the way of real experience and yet feel qualified to explain how relationships work.... so, good for me... I was able for once to hang out with cute girls, hot women, all of that, and not get swayed off my clear thinking about what was in MY BEST INTEREST .... and a lot of times sexual temptation would have pulled me into some mucked up situation that wasn't in my best interest... and I'm thanking my lucky stars I have some pros to help me keep the playing field level...

On the other side of the coin, you're going to find yourself becoming about 500% more selective as to who you get mixed up with on a civvie level so it will appear that you're less into the civvie scene when actually you have the added selectivity that more options afford you...

I was surprised by the side effect of my hobbying in that a number of women became more comfortble with me, some of them I would come out and explain my hobby and why, and they would relax because they knew I wasn't going to dump a lot of needy lower chakra BS on them as a way to get laid...

Where I stand now, 3 out of 5 marriages are based on stupid crap anyway and a ton of pain and wasted time could have been saved all concened if they let pros do what pros do best and skipped all those ridiculous dating scene rituals. My .02

PS.... unfortunately a lot of attractive women I have been around have a way of turning extemely materialistic and naggy about being bought this, given that.... so there's a big huff about how materialistic hookers are... I say gimme' a break... they're just telling it like the really feel it cause they have no motive to disguise their motives.

-- Modified on 5/28/2006 3:49:40 PM

-- Modified on 5/28/2006 3:51:04 PM

Why do you assume you'll become addicted?
Why is there an implicit assumption in your question that providers are some other species, capable of sexual prowess unattainable in the civilian world?  

I've only been in the hobby for 40 years and guess what -- providers are human beings just like civies.  Some are good in bed and others are not.  Some are sweethearts and some are bitches.  

Your question is a bit like assuming that if you eat at a 4 star restaurant, you'll never enjoy a burger again.  My answer -- try something different; broaden your horizons.  If your sexual appetite is such that you need a woman in your civilian life that, in your perception, acts like a w**re in bed, then hooray!  You've learned something about yourself.  Now, apply it, and make sure that your mate shares your views of how to act in the bedroom.  

That is the very best advice that you will ever get in this world of pleasure for the lion hearted. I agree with Mr. Jeopcon1: probably best for you to bail out NOW! Guilt is the MOST useless emotion known to man, and you will most certainly have a lot of it. Best wishes!

Man, you've really run the gamut of emotions and attitudes...adding things up like that is either a very bad thing or a very good thing...but never allows you to live in and enjoy the moment...there are many women out there - who aren't in the business - who are absolute sexual animals - but ya know, its all about chemistry, timing, passion and energy...stay clear if you know your path afterwards will be a destructive one...and good luck!!!

I think guilt is a part of life.   I think everyone has some of it to some degree for different things.  If I didn't try this at all then when I'm 75 and sitting back in my chair thinking of all those hot girls I could have done that I decided not to do when I was younger, I don't think I'd like that too much.  That is another type of guilt, the guilt of what could have been.  Befriending girls and then using them for sex and then breaking up with them leads to another type of guilt.  Guys do this type of thing all the time without thinking.  One thing is for sure you will have more control over your life and you won't be influenced by civie women that much.  That freedom is a great feeling.  I think some women might even find you more attractive when you don't need to bother with them.  However, maybe you should listen to the guys above, my mind may not be that objective at this time, LOL.

...I "dabble" in the hobby about once a month (sometimes less, sometimes more).  If I were made of money, then I would probably be addicted to it.  But since my money and my time are limited, it's not been that hard for me.  I have to say, that the hobby has definitely helped my marriage as a whole and my marrital sexlife in particular.  Some of the things I get from the hobby, I don't get at home. And vice versa, so it's made for better balance.

and be very honest with yourself:

"Am I a one woman man?"

If truly yes, then forget this hobby and go with the gal.

If not sure, do yourself (and her) a favor and dabble all you like until you know for sure.

One thing for certain, don't mislead her or yourself.

nowwhere but down.


All kidding aside, you could use some sex with your faulty line of reason.

xo Lisa Butler

to me... You will meet all types of women in this biz, and on at least one occasion, I have met a woman I would love to date in civie life... but alas... it is they who would not have me... I am green you know!  lol!

I only do this a few times a year due to my time, so I dont fine it a problem. I only wish my wife had desire and wasn't dealing with depression because of her fathers death 4 years ago or the 2 pounds she has gained over the year. she is 5-6, 125 and thinks she is obese.
cant women just enjoy their bodies and stopp with the pressure to be perfect. Argggg.

That's a good way to look at it.

I just came out of a relationship and am single, so I don't have any problem with guilt.

I've dabbled a bit before, mainly while traveling (Prague, Thailand, Vegas) and my experiences have been a very mixed bag - I'd say that only 25% of them were memorable. But with TER, I'll now be able to make sure they'll all be good experiences.

I guess the part of my question where I said "the bar will be set higher" meant that some providers are much hotter than the girls I usually date in RL (and the sex is probably much better in some cases as well). I was wondering if it's common for this to affect future relationships. For example, I've heard of guys who get addicted to porn and can no longer get turned on by the average girls they date. No, I don't have an addictive personality, but it's something that crossed my mind

I know that depression meds can zap someone's sex drive (not to mention that depression will, as well), but perhaps you could convince her that sex is a great way of shedding/keeping off the pounds.  I know this sounds bad, but I don't really mean for it to.  Just a suggestion.