I fell in love with a provider and want to see only her outside of the hobby even though she has implants and I usually only like real tits.  I’ve asked her to at least lower her rate when we’re together since she thinks I’m so “special” (she called me that herself), if she won’t see me for free.  I think I’m cool with her still providing, as long as it’s not with any posing TER posters.  Now that I’m in love with her, I’m going to give her my TER handle, which I didn’t give while screening. Would that be a right thing to do?

But when I’m with her, I just don’t know how to handle the business end of it since I love her and I’m sure she loves me.  Do I tip her; out her on the board when she NCNS, lighten or increase the envelope when she posts “specials” for the guys who aren’t as “special” as me?  I just don’t know how to handle this.  I’m having problems funding the hobby anyway, so I don’t know how to set my price-line with her (Where’s Captain Kirk when you need him?), particularly since she’s the one I’ve always dreamed about because she allows CIM when my wife won’t. Is that shallow of me?

And how can I possibly review her when she has crossed that magical plain into love?  Is my rating score too subjective? Do I let her review the review before I post it, or give her a chance to review me?  Oh, what am I going to do?

And for the wannabe lawyers out there, can I really get busted with her if I’m in love.  Even though there’s money involved, don’t all men who love someone give their women some money now and then.  Also, if the police are involved, can they question me or lie to us?

So, won’t somebody please help me?  I know these are issues that none of you have ever dealt with, but I’m lost.  Can I please only hear from the ladies on this one, I just can’t handle being picked on by the mean men who think they’re so funny posting under alias’ so that they can hide like cowards.

that all your teachers in school called you "special" too.

You mother, when she put your helmet on every day until you were 25, probably called you "special" too.

And I am sure that the poor people subjected to you in the workplace think you are "special" too.

Too Funny!  Too Funny Indeed!






-- Modified on 2/28/2008 7:17:27 AM

I will never drink coffee again while reading this forum....again, I'm sitting here having my morning coffee. All nice and relaxed...and then ya gotta go get all hilarious on me!!!!!!

You guys are toooo much!!!  But no, that doesn't mean I'll lower my rate for you either!!!

Oh, by the way.....take a peek at my boobies....real or fake???????   Sorry, I'm too dense to insert a pic. You'll just have to go to my website. I'm sorry it's a rare escort site. I know how you all hate those.

Spectacular!!!  My goodness, I just got that climbing a rope feeling.

More like a shoelace that occasionally squirts.

We have to stop or people will either start talking about us, or send us to the 6th board down. LOL

That's probably every question that will ever need to be asked. If everyone here just takes one of your many, many problems, and answers that one question burning deep inside of you, we can all rest and we may never have to do this again. By the way, are your tits real or fake?

Da da da daaaaaa....... 'fake'!!!!!!!!

Not hiding:  polecat58

And here is the honest help that you are seeking: Seek out and engage professional mental health assistance immediately! Do it now! Before you do something REALLY stupid and irrevocable. Not picking on you; really the best advice that I know to share with you. BTW, when your professional tells you to walk away from her, don't do it. Instead R-U-N away and don't look back!!!

Not hiding:  polecat58 here.

And here is the honest help that you are seeking: Seek out and engage professional mental health assistance immediately! Do it now! Before you do something REALLY stupid and irrevocable. Not picking on you; really the best advice that I know to share with you. BTW, when your professional tells you to walk away from her, don't do it. Instead R-U-N away and don't look back!!!

As "Bad -Ass" Padasky says:
"every piece of ass you get in this life you pay for ... one way or another."

roflmao that's good DC
uc

While I sympathize with you I would suggest that you move out of your parent's house such that your Mom does not call you "special" anymore... Which brings me to what your wife calls you....?  

I think that you need to lighten up and realize that this lady thinks of you as "special" in one hour increments and the "specialness" is probably directly proportional to the number of "bills" that pass between you.

As far as your legal problems are concerned, I suspect that should you ever be caught in a sting operation, you will not be sent to jail... but another facility where the staff wears white... (the windows will still have bars, but at least the view will be of a nice park with trees and such).

As far as you being OK with her "profession" I suggest that you reconsider your profession...   cause clearly you're not making enough as a comedian to support your wife, pay a token rent to your parents and an escort....

But then again... that is why we have TER - to get priceless advice like this...

Sheese... still looking for those gems.

What's with the anger, man.  It was a joke.

...I suggest that he re-post it tomorrow.  And then again the day after.  Maybe by then, someone will take this poor man's dire situation seriously!

Honestly, I don't know why God wasted a set of balls and a cock on someone like you.  My suggestion to you is that the next time you see your 'girlfriend' bring the biggest, thickest dildo you can find and have her strap it and fuck some sense into you!

by posts like yours in January about the dead horse and I tried to cover every dead horse issue from the last four months.  





-- Modified on 2/28/2008 8:38:50 PM

some didn't, and some were too bizarre to understand, but thanks for the replies.  I hope I at least brought a smile or two.  

For those that didn't get the joke, the following dead horse topics were covered all in the spirit of posting things that have just recently been covered:

Falling in love with provider
Real or Fake tits
Lowering the Rate
Using the TER handle for screening
Tipping
Handling a change in rates
Funding the hobby
Why married men hobby
Review standards
Reviewing Hobbyists
What can we be busted for
What can LE do when busting
Trying to limit responses to ladies only
Using an Alias

Good Luck

...Maybe if you'd put in a reference to Chyna, I might have caught a clue.  I doubt it, I'm such a dumbass.  Better post it again tomorrow.  And then again the day after.  Maybe by then I'll be up to speed...