Good Evening All - electronic communication tends to suppress normal and desirable inhibitions (rudimentary politeness) in and of itself. We email or post things that we would feel very uncomfortable saying to someone's face. When you add aliases to the picture, it gets much much worse. The overwhelming majority of stuff I see posted under aliases is rude or useless (with the exception of the Erotic Highway board). I do not see how aliases add anything to the board in and of themselves. I have come to the opinion that aliases should be banned from TER except again for the erotic highway board. Your thoughts? (flame away).

-- Modified on 10/23/2008 4:33:07 PM

they do bring some comedic value, such as the entire followme family of characters. There may be other times when the use of an alias would be useful in a post that may prove somewhat embarrassing to someone who really needs some input, but too many people know him or her personally.

But for the most part, I agree with you 100%. It does get way out of hand, and frankly I think that some of the posts and replies I've seen here should be grounds for banishment or moderation at the very least. Most of us are here to have a little fun, maybe learn a few things, and with a little luck, make a few friends.

I've only been around the boards for about a year or so, and some of the frequent posters whose opinions I value most don't come around, in large part, because of these dipshits that your talking about.

to be kind about it.

But for that 1% which may be valuable, I would continue to allow them.

If not a forum like this, then where?

Sometimes legitimate criticism is made by a poster who is using an alias but who prefers not to be identified with the criticism. Sure, we all admire posters who will take an unpopular position and stand behind it. But, if their point is valid, it really does not matter if they conceal their true identity.


            Take, for example, the alias who blasted all who championed the GFE (I was one) as sad, pathetic, and ridiculous. Now the alias was roundly blasted in turn by almost everyone else, including me. But while I greatly disagreed with the crude way he made his point, there was some truth in what he said, and even though he did not want to be identified as the poster, he made a legitimate point, much to my chagrin.

       In addition, the alias feature is useful for the moderators who may sometimes desire to comment as TER members rather than in their official positions.

         Now there are some who abuse the alias feature by using it as a license to be mean. We could do without these guys but banning or any kind of prior restraint is never a good idea when speech is involved. The best remedy remains the condemnation of the general community in reply.






-- Modified on 10/23/2008 6:01:55 PM

Aliases do have valid uses, but those don't seem to be the most common ways they are used. I think they can be helpful when you have something to ask and you don't want a particular person to know you are asking. I have used them on a couple of very rare instances to get information on a situation without making a specific person feel badly. Rather than hiding my identity from everyone, it was really to hide my identity from just one person, to avoid potentially hurting their feelings.

Any technology can be used with good or bad intentions. Aliases are no different. The trick is to find a way to minimize the downside without taking away the potential benefit. That isn't an easy task.

There was a US Supreme Court Justice (I think it was Earl Warren, but I'm too lazy to look it up.) who said that the cure for too much freedom of speech is more freedom of speech.

In other words, I hear hear something you don't like, speak up.

Why the use of another name other then the one you signed into this site for, don't jump on me all at once now everyone, and this is only my opinion, but isn't that a sneaky thing to do? it's one thing if you come back as a lady with a "new" name because of an outing or a stalking, but to go into a chat room, or sending mail etc, isn't that just a ladder for drama and mistrust?
Jay

is to allow someone to reveal something very personal and either embarrassing or actually harmful if the person was identifiable.  I can think of a provider who is married and does not like to reveal that to clients as an example.  In general, I have noticed that aliases are used to allow for nastiness.  I guess that is all right, but it does generally detract from the spirit of these sites.

I use an alias so that my personal and intimate ramblings do not reflect on the gentle ladies I've had the pleasure to review.

skb
(8 reviews)

-- Modified on 10/24/2008 6:05:30 AM

1. Use of topical humor

2. The creation of a character(literary license) to be used in an informative, fun, innocuously sarcastic, philanthropic, as well as topical way.

3. Anonymity for when regional or associational sensitivities may be of concern.

4. Innocuous playing of "devils advocate" in a discussion or debate where one wishes to not be further/future aligned with one point of view or the other.

5. Avoidance of suffering political fallout for a comment that may have been misread in a possibly volatile discussion.

6. aliases may be used for posting investigative reports, meet & greet announcements, helpful advice, or other similar types of useful information where the use of a user-name could prove problematic.

7. To 'classify' the content of the posts.
(You can readily surmise a post's cant when you see an alias like 'Sardonic Satyr'

8. Concerns in revealing your review history.

9. Ability to contribute where you might otherwise feel embarrassed to speak candidly.


The ONE redundantly belabored MISUSE of aliases: "Chickenshits hide behind them for reasons of flaming "

At any time when the topic I am speaking of concerns some details of my private life and or family which I wish to remain just that. Private.

All other areas I will certainly use my real handle. Some of us have reasons (Stalkers, ex-husbands) that we maintain some degree of privacy in our posts.

However, I don't believe that aliases who flame, belittle or incite anger in others should be allowed.

~Rae

Although I do see the reasons for the use of aliases’ I for one would never. The way I se it is that this form it to be use to meet like minded new and potential clients and maybe even a friend or 2.  Also given that it’s sexual in nature I personally would not discus any overly personal information or detail about my real life and certainly not of my family.  My primary goal here is to market my self and business to the people I’m most compatible with, so if I were to post some thing under and aliases I feel that would defeat the very propose  of its  nature. And for the ones' who use them just to start fights should be baned... Just a thought.

Free speech is not at issue here. Free Speech is limited here on TER - if you say the wrong thing, you will likely be moderated. But beyond that, your TER handle is already an alias. The overwhelming majority of times I see an additional alias being used it is to say something harmful or destructive - even on the newbie board for crying out loud. It is rare the topic that is not marred by someone who decides to use an alias to say something totally useless or insulting and they don't have the guts to stand behind their comment with their TER handle. I have used an alias only on The Erotic Review. I did not even use an alias on my recent and sensitive post on this board "a question for the ladies about friendship with a client".

here on the board. Additionally, many providers know my Gregory12 as well as a few friends I've made on the board.

I am so annoyed by the idiotic and useless posts that seem to account for 90% of the use of aliases on this board. I've even seen newbies insulted on the newby board for crying out loud. But I've appreciated everyone's input. I see that there are a few legitimate uses for aliases. I currently believe that the bad is outweighing the good in terms of volume, but aliases remain an important tool for some who use them for legitimate reasons.

The way I see it the term alias AS USED on this board is any name other than the one on your TER birth certificate.
For the purpose of this board The name on your TER birth certificate is your "real name" and any other name you use is an alias
As for me, I suppose,technically,  you could say I  have numerous aliases, however since the Followme family is so large I allow my cousins and other family menbers to sign on using my TER log in name then go to their names such as
SantaFollowmeClaus
FatherFollowme
EasterFollowmeBunny
PopeFollowmeLXIX
DrFollowmeOBGYN
RabbiFollowme
Followmeopolis
JudgeFollowme
ChefFollowme
FollowmeEsq
to name just a few of my family (there are many, many others )it is a large family.
So technically these are aliases , however in my case they are all real  members of the followme family.
To the best of my knowledge they do behave themselves.


I hope this clears things up.

Thank You
XLIII = 4

Ps   sweet lil Ciara I hope we are an exception wink


-- Modified on 10/23/2008 7:50:51 PM

that exist only in the forums and have no visible connection with the other functions on TER. TER is in cyberspace and real world rules don't really apply here. TER makes the rules here and TER says there will be aliases in TER forums. I pay for this feature and I like to use it. Users that don't like don't have to use it. End of story

I see the purpose when someone needs to be anonymous, but it's way too overused and it creates too much drama.  I don't know of any other board that allows aliases.  If they stopped allowing it, I bet it'll make the moderators work load much less.

but those of us who have known Eddie Munster have known he is that way for a long time.

Your conclusion further down the thread is a correct one.  Unfortunately, you let in 90% of the jerks who post BS under aliases to allow the 10% or real useful stuff that is up that way.

Kind of like life.

Peace, dude.

Sometimes someone wouldn't say something that is painfully obvious if they used their normal handle but they would say it with an alias.

As long as it promotes truth versus rudeness than I am fine with the ability to use an alias.

xo lisa butler

and there would also be less traffic on the boards.
It gets tiresome listening to people whining about the use of an alias.
It is a perk for VIP members, and I enjoy using them. True, I am not always the nice guy when I use an alias, but I am also helpful and even humorous from time to time.
Lets all remember why we are here. This is not Alice in Wonderland.
Not a single one of us is using their name here either.
So instead of whining, try it. You may like it.

You have opined that all aliases should be banned because most aliases make posts that are rude and useless. So the reason for your proposed prior restraint is the content of the post. And your proposal is overbroad –you want to ban all aliases because of the sins of the majority. That, sir,  is a direct assault on speech.

       And if posting of rude and senseless posts is the rationale for this banning, shouldn't TER members using their handles also be banned if they post something rude and uselless? Yike I would have been banned long ago,

            And TER does not moderate because a post is rude or useless. TER moderates if you violate the posting rules which are few and quite reasonable.

            The unique feature of this debate, and the feature that most favors your position, is that the speech restriction is imposed only on an alias. So if the poster uses his handle he is not restricted.

         However, because many times a poster would not make the post at all unless shielded by an alias, your banning plan still has the indirect effect of chilling speech.

         Look at the media in general, Gregory. How often has the media reported a criticism or a news story by an “anonymous source?” If you banned “anonymous sources” from the media, a vast amount of true information would be kept from the public.

         So ultimately this is another of society’s balancing tests. We balance the annoyance of useless alias posts against the need for the occasional useful ones.

         So I return to my original view that prior restraint is not justified here and that community outrage in reply is the better remedy.



-- Modified on 10/24/2008 5:47:55 AM

for all of your many enjoyable posts. Would that aliases were generally used so creatively and humorously....

Just a thought. Would require the cooperation of the moderator and or TER staff. Of course I/we do not have any authority or power to do so. But it does seem that the mods and staff pay attention (at times) to the opinions expressed on the boards....

I was born and raised til ten years of age in Germany, in a time and place where manners were culturally inculcated. Though I have not lived in Germany for almost fifty years, I find that I am imprinted with the manners of my youth. Even during my career in the US Military, I found a quiet voice and a polite approach to be a very effective command technique. Those who know me will tell you that the more pissed off I become, the more precise my manners. I have not lived in the US very much because the US military has had uses for me elsewhere. That which passes for polite manners here I find to be a bit grating - now please do not be offended - I don't meant to be taken as judgmental - I recognize that I am the "outsider" here. In fact, when my contract with a certain government agency expires, I will retire to Germany, where in many ways I find myself to be much more at home. Perhaps an argument in favor of genetics over adaption. The bottom line for me is that I find the outright aggression and hostility often expressed by those using aliases on this board weighs heavily against the tremendous value of many of the posts and comments I find here. I recognize this as my "issue". And I appreciate those of you with whom I have had valuable and enjoyable "conversations" here.  Cheers - Gregory

TER does enforcement by moderating them, whether an alias is used or not. Suspending one's use of an alias does not make good business sense.
I have seen other sites where use of an alias is not permitted. Do you think they are drama free? Hell no. In fact, some are worse.
If you don't like what you read, just try ignoring it.
     

I think you have fit in here very well.

Frankfurt and some British Team.  Large crowd made up of anonymous individuals and small groups of friends or family all with a common interest for which they express their opinions and feelings in many different ways.  This crowd will have great people (polite, involved, helpful, and typically happy), average people (relatively quiet, leaving others alone, and enjoying themselves) and assholes.  The assholes will, while usually drunk and always stupid, try to incite anger and hostility in the average and great people with boorish, mean, and obnoxious behavior, relying on their relative anonymity within the large crowd.  Sometimes it gets out of hand and you have disturbances, fights, or soccer riots.  Most of the time, however, the idiots are ignored successfully enough to allow them to slink back into their holes so that the rest of the crowd can enjoy the game.  I believe it is widely accepted that the presence of these hooligans should neither change the face of the game, nor others' enjoyment of it.

These discussion boards are available worldwide through the internet.  Therefore, the pool of participants is extremely large.  As large as it is, there are bound to be assholes lurking out there who manifest their boorish behavior through the use of rudeness, meanness, and otherwise flaming under the relative anonymity of an alias just so they can get their rocks off (obviously they are not equipped to do so regularly through the hobby since their balls did a NCNS at birth).  Aliases are abused when used to flame someone or stir the pot, and some of these assholes have refined their technique to the point of just reaching the line drawn by TER rules, but not crossing it so as to be punished.  Still, the rudeness and meanness is there, just as it is in life.

Gregory, if you leave the boards, taking with you your positive affect, then you let the assholes win.  The better strategy, I would suggest, would be to help us collectively ignore the ball-less fucks so that they fail miserably in trying to satisfy their base urges to be the assholes that they are.  I take some satisfaction whenever I see one of their posts hanging naked in the wind because I know that they are sitting in their mother's basements freaking out that nobody is taking the  bait.

My overall experience with TER is that 95% of the members who actively contribute to the board are friendly, polite, and willing to help each other out even when they disagree (excluding the P&R board, which is an exercise in cyber BDSM).  Why stop interacting with the rest of us just because assholes show their ass?

Good luck

Gregory -

I have to wholeheartedly agree with Hungry and D_C.
Losing your input, insight and thoughtful contributions would be a tragic loss.
Yes there will always be alias using (or should that be alias abusing?) Trolls on the boards. Not just here but on any public forum where a poster can hide behind any form of anonymity.
Yes, these Trolls will sometimes be obnoxious, tedious and downright nasty.
Yes, sometimes other posters will feed the Trolls, because that is what a Troll wants, to be fed. To get a rise out of other posters on the board. They post for the pure satisfaction of raising the ire of other posters who then feed the Troll by telling them how much they dislike their posts!
Try and ignore the Trolls when you see one and they frequently will just crawl back under the bridge they came from. Sometimes they’ll come back, because a Troll is a Troll and wants to get fed, but as D_C said if you leave they win.

My .0001 cents  (that’s all I had left in my 401K..)

C_K


-- Modified on 10/24/2008 10:12:43 AM

-- Modified on 10/24/2008 11:04:48 AM

http://www.newsfilter.org/video/23386/Poo_pigs_and_their_gurgling_shit_fountain/

You say in your post you were raised ina a "time and place" where manners were(not sure what you mean here)culturally inculcated?  But if you mean where manners were expected and followed...then it was more about the times and less about the place.  Time being a very relative term based on the progression and evelution of the people in the region.  For the industrialised nations times have changed...life in general has been over run with greed over morality!  Your short note really does insult the US as a whole, but I will forgive your words as you have confused a generation issue with a place of habitation.  I think when you retire in Germany you will find that mannerisms will have changed as a whole there as well.  I think many of the people on this board would agree that when they were being raised it was unheard of to talk back to your parents in a way that many do now...I am happy to say that my kids respect my wishes and if they sdisagree, they do it respectfully...with me and those around them, thank you very much.
Now to your mention of the military...you sound like a life time military man...please tell me you have NOT just been going through the motions and missed the entire premise that they teach!  Be strong both in mind and in body.  Fight for what you believe in, to the death and be proud of it!  The military does also have an underlying problem with their phylosophy as it applies to the real world...IT DON'T WORK! The civie world does not run like the military...people are allowed to think for themselves and they do...freedom of speech as you know it in the military is NOT FREEDOM OF SPEECH and you should understand that by now!  As you used a disclaimer in your post...I will use it here...I am not saying these things with intent to insult you in any way, more to help you understand my thoughts.  You are used to saying something and everyone haveing to listen to you as a subordinate, you are an equal here my friend.
As to your comment of being an outsider....hmmmm to where?  It is all relative to your mind only!  No matter where you are you are an outsider to someone!  The thought actually derives back to which came first, the chicken or the egg.  The USA is young as a nation, but people lived here LONG before it got its name we are all outsiders to those people.  Germany was not the first country in Erope to be named, thus all Germans are outsiders to those that were there before them!   TER is a young community amongst the world of the HOBBY, boy is it ever young!  We are all outsiders to the hobby as it was when it first originated!  The internet is an outsider to non face-to-face communication it is just being cultivated to bring more people together.  I am sure that you have heard that many people say things far more freely on the internet than they would in person because of anonimity!  It would be rare in the world today to find a person that has not used a non face-to-face function of communication to share something uncomfortable with another person because it was easier!  Likewise people exagerate and use fantasy on those modes far more than in face to face as well.   I think TER is mostly fantasy right....don't take it so personal!
Your next issue of statement will undoubtedly creat controversy here as it does in the field of science...so here it goes in short.  Mannerisms are NOT genetic, they are adaptable! Mannerisms of hotsility and agression do not ruin this board...look at those posts as an opportunity for debates, debates are not agruments, they are two sides that differ and have merit.  As some here have already ststed, some of those posts simply should be ignored for they have no value or substance.  
As for your reasons for leaving this forum...I believe you do have charactor and the will to fight for what you believe in...your military background as a basis for my thought.  So for me your reason has nothing to do with the posts that you combat here in the forums.  I do hope that you enjoyed your time in the hobby and will find happiness on the outside!

Many layers of anonymity are need to express oneself completely here on TER.  Without an alias of an alias of an alias, I might say something that upsets someone else, and I wouldn't want to do that as an quasi-known entity on an internet website of a gray market.  That would be wrong.  We should say upseting things while wearing a mask and talking in our scary or funny voices.  And then cover our ears and yell, "Lalalalalalalalalalalalala...."

That why I alway use an alias.  Thank you and have an unoffending day without consequences.  

Yours Truely,

2 underscores and some characters.

I only tried to explain why I have a low tolerance for the rudeness often, but certainly not always, employed by the alias users. This whole topic has been "thinking out loud" for me. On reflection and on reading all of your posts on the topic (for which I thank you all), I realize that this is my issue, not an issue with the board in and of itself, or even the exceptionally rude posters. As has been suggested here, the only thing I can really do in response to the occasional rude or useless post is to ignore it. I found myself especially worked up by recent hostile and attacking posts on the newbie board. And I'm experiencing a couple of fairly major life stresses right now as well.  I promise that I shall not be a curmudgeon. Again, thank you all for expressing your opinions on this topic.

Hello - I'm not certain whether I miscommunicated or am being misunderstood. Perhaps a bit of both.
Yes, when I was born, manners were rather more important in both the US and Germany. However, when I arrived in the US as a young teenager in the early 60s, I was taken somewhat aback by what seemed to me at the time to be unmannerly behavior here. Being a dual citizen of the US / EU I spend my eight weeks of annual vacation in Germany every year, at our family home outside of Erbach im Odenwald, which our family have owned for over 700 years. Therefor I am aware of the state of manners in Germany, which, indeed have slipped since I was a child, but which remain strict by many standards.  But these kind of comparisons are not the issue of my post. I was trying, apparently inadequately, to say that I have learned from the discussion on this topic that it is my sense of appropriate behavior that does not fit in terribly well on the board. I take responsibility for that. I will gladly keep the manners with which I was raised and which were reinforced during my military career, but I will not allow myself to be so easily offended by "behavior" on the board. I will tell you though, to this day, if a clerk or salesperson asks for my first name, I tell him / her "Mister, or Master Chief, take your choice".  Cheers - Gregory

I have absolutely no idea who (in real life) 99.99% of the folks are here and neither do you. OK, so you are known to a few real world people. That's your choice. You make that choice on an individual basis. You wouldn’t think of publishing any personal info here any more than I would. So in effect your gregory12 alias secludes you from all those that you do not yet know on a personal basis. It secludes you from everyone that you do not choose to include in your ‘inner circle’. So to that end, you, gregory12 are no different than some other alias of an alias to all the rest of us.

Love,

tra4fun
GnatKingPole
JuanHungLow
moassthanatoiletseat
etc
etc
etc
etc

Ain't your handle an alias?

Sheeesh!

Kisses,

Dr.EmilioJizzardo

Semantically you are correct. But since I use only Gregory12 on the board, my "reputation" on the board rises or falls with my behavior on the board. Most of us care about our "main" alias. How we behave on the board may also have consequences in the matter of our relationships with providers and each other outside of the board. Hate Speech while cowering behind an alias only serves the interest of those who don't want there to be any consequences for their behavior on the board.

It is a private venue - it has owners who run it ostensibly in the interest of the participants. Your arguments only apply to the public domain. Even business restrict speech on their property, their time. You argument is eloquent, but you're comparing apples and oranges.

I agree.


Thank You
XLIII = 4

my reasoning or logic is not rhetorical. It's correct (as you admit). It's not a matter of right or wrong. It's a matter of degree of anonymity. You choose to relinquish some of the anonymity of your TER handle, most others don’t.

My frame of reference is life outside TER discussion boards (i.e. real life, the one that matters).

-- Modified on 10/25/2008 11:53:02 AM

You should srop by the Bistro Followme one day.


Thank You
XLIII = 4

Yes, Hungry,

They have G I A N T crow there

I'm sorry but you have mistaken it for RAVEN which is served it many ways.

Trust me the chef is always RIGHT.


Thank you
XLIII = 4


-- Modified on 10/25/2008 7:20:03 PM