Just came back from a lousy and expensive dinner, and if you live in San Diego, you know this is the town for it!

In the thread Hushush started, I thought of something happened to me long ago, somewhat relevant.  Since the forum is hot tonight, I will share it before I fall asleep here.

Logo ago, I visited a famous place in Northern California that these activities were completely legal.  This was an extraordinary place those days, filled with truly beautiful women.  If you have been there in 70s and 80s, you know what I mean.

As I entered the place, I saw this gorgeous curlish reddish-blonde woman, standing at 5'9", 140 lb, blue eyes, perfect legs and shapely, the textbook example of a Scandinavian beauty. As I approached her, she was all smiles, but then asked for a fee that was way outside of the normal range.  Although I could afford it, I decided I wasn't going to be taken for a ride.

So I retreated to the bar.  She turned down a lot of foreign tourists that I am sure would have paid her fees and more, walked towards me, and said she wanted to spend the time with me, for whatever fee I felt was appropriate.  It turned out she was from Chicago, used to work for a high tech corporation, college educated, but recession had hit, she had lost her job, and there she was.

For the ensuing 7 months, I would fly up there to see her every 2-3 weeks.  One winter evening, after skiing, I went to see her, and after we went to the room, she just burst into tears, and went on and on how humiliating this job was, how she felt she was being degraded, and the tears just wouldn’t stop.  She had aged considerably over the span of the seven months, from a rose in full bloom, to a flaccid and pale flower.  She was probably suicidal.

To make a long story short, I immediately arranged for her to leave the place, helped her to get back on track and she ultimately got her life back.   In a visit a while later to the place she lives, we had a wonderful dinner, she was back in full bloom, gorgeous, restarting her career, and finally got married to a true gentleman and a doctor.  Her secret has been  forever safe with me, and that fateful night, I deciced I would be her friend, not lover. In a sailing trip off of key west, her husband once joked that when she see me, she acts like a kid at Christmas eve! This was very kind of him to say, and it was a reward I forever cherish deep in my heart.

Indeed, this business is not for everyone,  and for all of those who participate in it, it is not always possible to check our humanity and conscientious at the door. Although we try!

your first sentence had me rolling - so true - altho I'm used to it now! LOL

Anyway, nice story, thanks.

Thanks so much for that sweet and touching story. That's all I wanted. Someone who understands that circumstances (job lay off, drugs and/or alcohol, etc) turns you into a provider, not some romantic "Pretty Woman" ideal of the industry. I didnt start out as a provder and I dont want to end up as a provider. I'm just a girl, trying to make it in the world. I want a husband, and a baby, and a house with the picket fence. I'm going to school in march to learn a skill for a career that I've always dreamed of and really love. While I developed a closeness with my regulars (obviously), "I" always understood what my role was. I never expected them to leave their wives and run off with me. I never expected to be included in their private lives. Hey, that was my job, to keep that privacy and confidentiality. So imagine my surprise when they wanted to invade "my" life? I was confused as to why it didnt work both ways. Why my life was less important than theirs.

Stranger in the night, actually you are my KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR. A sincere thanks to you.

hush hush

...that the  hobby has something for everyone!  Whatever floats your boat, man, (staying naughtily nautical), from the wham-bam-thank-ya-ma'am to the possbility of being The White Knight to the One True Princess, the possibilities are all there.  I'm working on the latter scenario, sending discreet messages and electronic gift certificates to a presumably dead email pseudonym box, to someone who I know has moved on and moved away, whom I nonetheless miss dearly.

It makes me think back on many ladies I've seen and wonder what was really going on under the surface that I was allowed to see.

I want everyone to be happy in their selection of this profession and like to believe that they are.  But reality suggests otherwise.  There are so many sigmas attached to this.  And it isn't just "society".  

A lot of the psychological struggles with sex: who, when, how, can never be completely dealt with because IMHO they are not the same in each of us.  So what fits one human can't feel the same for another. If this is the case, how can we ever feel truely free to enjoy our decision? How,when we feel strongly for someone and care how they feel and yet know that they don't, can't, or won't share our joy in our sexual decisions, do we ever feel free in that decision?

Isn't it wonderful when we really understand that the most important thing in life is to treat each other with some dignity & tenderness?  Although Stranger's generosity was admirable, the "hobby" doesn't necessarily have to cost us one single penny when it comes to respect.

Now ain't that some shit, folks?  No offense intended to anyone, but why do we have to keep pretending that hobbying is something "spiritual?"  I didn't mean to pick on you in particular -- I've been reading posts like this for some time now.  Spaceghost_12345 wrote a post in response to HushHush that actually mentioned a book dealing with God.  That's right, I said GOD.  What could God possibly have to do with the "hobby?"  I'm no atheist, but I hardly think that God is in the room when some dominatrix 'straps one on' and shoves it up my chute, or when some college girl sits on my face in a rathole motel room.

And then I read your post, in which you mention the "nurturing spirit of humanity."  Did I miss something?  Did I or did I not pay to get laid?  I'm sorry, but I don't think that there is anything even remotely nurturing, Godly, Karmic, or (especially)spiritual about MY encounters as a hobbyist.  Maybe we're just in different hobbies.    

-- Modified on 12/28/2003 6:16:44 PM

You are missing one hell of a lot, and I hope you find it someday.
In Love and Light,
Devie

What did I miss?  You can't just leave me hanging.

An interesting analogy, but in a thread that begins with a discussion of (ostensibly) selfless altruism, one shouldn't lose sight of the fact that in chess, the ultimate goal is to defeat one's opponent. Unfortunately, that's exactly what's wrong with our geopolitics AND domestic politics:

On the world stage, we exclude France, Germany, and the Russian Federation from help in restoring iraq because they wouldn't help us make it NEED restoring.

Here at home, we learn that the beef industry successfully lobbied congress last year to modify legislation allegedly making our food safe so that it would NOT prevent them from introducing meat from cattle that can't walk into the general food supply.

Our current government, controlled by giant corporations, has been termed a "kleptocracy." We need to take it back.

How's THAT for veering off-topic?

Kuru is the prototype for BSE (bovine spongiform encephalopathy-Mad Cow Disease) and Jacob Cruetzfeld disease, the "prion" diseases caused by eating infected neural tissue. The diseases may be spread by blood as well, which is why if one has lived more than some arbitrary time in the UK, one cannot be a blood donor in the USA. Bovine blood products are STILL (as of early afternoon today) permissible for inclusion in cattle feed in the US. Even more bizarre, neural tissue from cows can be fed to chickens, and chicken carcasses can be ingredients in cattle feed.

Today's WSJ has some interesting data regarding how haphazard our monitoring of the cattle food supply is compared with Japan (where EVERY head of cattle is tested before slaughter - a meaningless statistic, perhaps, since Japan isn't exactly prime cattle ranch country), or Western Europe, where more beef cattle are tested at slaughter in a single DAY then we test in the US in an entire year.

Forget the chess; I'm going to have a burger

I don't think we'll get away with blaming the Canadians. I suspect we'll be testing a BUNCH soon.