Oh come on now Sedona, you can tell them the real reason you fell, thinking about our date yesterday afternoon
By the way, thanks it was spectacular
This guy saw my mother changing my diaper at a roadside rest. I'm 30 years old. He must of laugh for hours
I'm told that as a woman's body ages, it tends to "settle." Perhaps that's it? Or, a flux in the earth's gravitational field... Just guessing....
Anyway, hoped you survived your terrestrial encounter better than Gerald Ford did (skinned knee, chin abrasion) and are well.
M1SP
-- Modified on 8/14/2004 3:59:56 PM
Yeah, that is why I wear the 7" stillettos, it is an easy, and handy excuse.
I am very proud of my barf moment. I am pleased it has been cemented in my reviews (see Jacksonlips) I just wish I had a video of it. Any takers for a filming of future spewing? Maybe for October on my website I could have pumpkin colored spew, or for the Holidays green and red spew. 4th of July: red, white and blue spew. I could spew on canvas and shrink wrap it, and sell it to the Japanese on eBay. Ah! To be an American escort with a sense of humor, and stuck on a Greyhound bus heading to Saratoga Racetrack to pet and bet on the ponies. Gotta love these webphones. Sedona, we have to meet one of these days.
As most of my friends know, I am NOT a morning person. At any rate, was running very late one morning, so I quickly showered, dressed and out the door I went. Around mid day, had the need to urinate so made my way to the men's room. Standing in front of the urinal, I lowered my zipper and began to fish around for the opening in my boxers as is required to complete the task. Well, I fished and fished for that opening for what seemed like forever without success. Of course, by this time, the other gentlemen in the room were beginning to give me some strange looks. Seems that I put my boxers on backwards that morning and no amount of fishing or searching was going to be of any use.
This goes back to when I was married years ago.
I was in my usual morning frantic mood, trying to get ready to hit the freeway, but not certain what planet I was on or what day of the week it was. Finally, it's time to leave and I'm getting increasingly agitated because I can't find my belt, and when you where a suit you pretty much need to have an appropriate belt.
My wife came in and looked at me and said, you've already got two belts on. Do you really think you need a third? Sure enough, I looked down and there was one belt buckled right over the other.
Jeez, I hate mornings! Has ANYTHING good ever happened before lunch in the entire history of the world?
My most embarassing moment involves the wind hitting too far up my legs, way up my legs. Turns out one morning I was so gung ho to start my day that I had on a long teeshirt and a jockstrap, and duhhhh. Fortunately only one person saw me before I made a beeline for home.
Sedona, don't feel too bad, I have seen several people do what you did. I guess they were momentarily distracted and took a misstep. Hope the scrapes go away fast.
If you want an embarrassing try this one
My then girlfriend, Marina, and her sister Anna where at my place one evening. The girls are Russian, and Marina had instructed me to always keep a bottle of vodka in the freezer. Well, this particular evening, Marina stumbled upon her bottle, and we all began doing shots.
Now, together, the two girls might weigh as much as I, and I was going to be damned if I'd be out-drunk by a couple of chicks. So, I matched them shot for shot. No problem. When the vodka ran out, Anna found my scotch. Then the coniac. Then the Drambuie.
The three of us were so hammered, we could barely make it up the stairs. I seem to recall the two girls in the tub, and one of them holding my "handle," as it were, for balance. I also kind of remember something about my going into the bedroom to wait for the girls to join me.
The next morning, I awoke naked, alone and with my head at the foot of the bed. There were no sheets, pillows or blankets. When I got up, I stepped in one of several large pools of what had been my dinner the night before.
I went downstairs to the living room, but the girls weren't there. The bed clothes, however, where in a pile on the bottom step. So, I staggered down another flight to the guest room, where I found the two asleep on the futon. I woke Marina and asked her what was going on. She made a face like I'd just farted and asked, "You don't remember? You threw up IN my sister."
Not my finest hour.
-- Modified on 8/14/2004 5:32:15 PM
OK, first embarrassing moment was at Benny Hanna’s (sp). Had one of those TALL glasses of fine imported beer sitting in front of me. So I as I reached for the damn thing, and I watched it topple over, cooling that big iron grid they call a grill, all I could think about was Hiroshima as I saw the big, larger than life mushroom cloud fill the room. Well, if your going to make an impression on the world, make it BIG, I say. They knew Stealthmode was in the house…AHHH, the fine smell of burnt beer flowing across the ceiling.
Second time was actually with an employee…. as he sat down on one of those handicapped toilet seats where they lift they seats 2” off the bowl. He pissed ALL over his pants, thinking he was hitting the edge of the bowl. Really funny thing about it was he did the damn thing, a year later, all over again…
Life has a strange way of making us realize our humanity…
SM
I had only been "online" a matter of days, and didn't know exactly what I was doing. I was on a small, local board.
I wrote an extremely pornographic, erotic love-lust letter to a woman I was seeing...
And instead of PMing it to her, I posted it to the discussion group.
The administrator said it set the record for hits.
It was good training for writing reviews on TER.
/Zin
-- Modified on 8/15/2004 2:32:43 AM
A fall can be a nasty thing. Work with bangs/boo-boo's all the time.
I never find a situation where someone gets hurt and is in pain 'funny'.
Fell better soon....(your medic's orders)
P.S. Can I volunteer as your personal medic for a week....I don't eat much (on a diet via my MD) sleep anywhere that is 3'X6', and only expect to be at your beck and call as pay.......(ok, I'm begging, I have no self respect....I admit it.....)Maybe you can talk NM into being my helper????????????
Ozzy
