i would like some input on setting up a vacation/trip with a favorite that I see regularly.  First some background:

- I have been seeing her for two and a half years (1 - 2 times a month)
- I see her for two hour sessions each time  
- on a few occasions (maybe 4 or 5 times total) she has chosen to stay longer (as long as 5 hours) but usually we end on time give or take a few minutes.
- I am grandfathered at a rate of $700 for two hours (she currently charges $900 for a two hour session).
- she does not list rates for anything longer than two hours although I once scheduled 6 hours with her for a special occasion and she charged me $1700 (this was about 6 months after I first met her).

With the above context and background, my question is what would you consider a reasonable daily rate to offer her for a 3 - 5 night trip (particularly interested in hearing from the ladies but all input is welcome)? Do you recommend a shorter or longer trip?

also, I'm concerned that if we can't reach an agreement that we both are happy with  do I run the risk of damaging the on-going relationship. How have you or do you suggest approaching this.

Thanks

Don't offer her any amount, just tell her your plan and ask her how much donation she would want for that.  If it's too much you can bow out gracefully, no harm done.

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I would approach with caution. People can be good actors for a short period of time. Being together for several days is so different. I would go no more than three days. If its bad, you haven't lost much. If a good time is being had, you can always schedule anther trip.

Even civvie relationships can't stand that much "togetherness" some times.

I can't speak for what is "fair" That range is just too wide for me to even speculate. If she charged you 1,700 for six hours, I wouldn't expect her to do 24 hours for less than $3,000, so do the math.

Part of it will depend on how much "work" she will expected or is anticipating to have to do. If you are high maintenance and expect to fuck five times a day and are up her ass the whole trip, I am sure her asking price will reflect that. If she expects to get some real vacation time out of the deal and looks at the trip as possibly even being "fun" her rate may reflect that too.  

Too many variables to contemplate as an outsider. Good luck, and remember several days is a long time to spend with anyone.

OK thanks. Just for clarifications sake I really wouldn't require sex but once a day (it would be up to her if it was more) as I really want the experience of a true vacation with her (site seeing, beach time, etc). She would of course have some "own time" if she wanted it. I assume these are all things that should be discussed beforehand - correct?

if she wants to even do a 3 day. And what she would charge on top of expenses.

All you can do is ask, but let her tell you the rate. You have a 50/50 chance of it being too high, or even shockingly low.

Now, here's the expectation. 1700 for 6 hours is a nice rate. A lot of ladies at that rate I'm guessing would charge 3-4K / day, then go down a little per day after that. That would be a mid-range amount listed on websites of ladies at a 700/2 hour date.

But - then there are some who list those rates much lower, or that is meant for people they haven't established a long term business relationship with.

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Ask her if she wants to do the trip and how much her fee would be (keep in mind that this is on top of all trip expenses - all travel, lodging, meals; maybe some gifts). If she's been doing this for a while she should have a general number which you can then take, leave, or further negotiate with. Beware of offending her with a lowball number by offering first.  

By her not posting an extended date rate, she's reserving the ability to price based on how enthusiastic she feels about traveling with you, and on this particular trip (is it someplace she wants to go, doing activities she likes to do?). If after all this time you still get the sense that time with you is work for her (of course it's work, but if she ACTS like it's work...), then be prepared for sticker shock. Or, you might be delightfully surprised. In the end, it doesn't matter what I consider reasonable, it's what you two consider reasonable.  

Also, if there is any lingering uncertainty with boundaries and expectations (sleeping arrangements, sexy stuff, together/alone time, etc.), be sure to clear that up before the trip.

Offering puts her on the spot, asking won't even put you on the spot if you phrase it properly. Depending on her answer you can either accept immediately if you like it, or you can simply respond with a noncommittal "ok great, it was just a thought, lets talk about it further some day" if the number is outside of your budget with no feelings hurt on either side.

After two and a half years of substantial time together, you two should have a pretty good feel for how you would get along on vacation and be flexible with each other. Once the money issue is taken care of, then it should feel like vacationing with a fuck buddy. But yeah, if in doubt, talk it out.

It's also a wise idea to schedule a trip where you are not "trapped together" A cruise, or flying to the islands, or anything of the kind gives neither of you much "bail out" room if your chemistry starts to fade.

Multi day trips can be fantastic, but they can also be a nightmare, I have experienced both.

which is very understandable ....
your offer better be generous or you might damage on-going business relationship)

i am probably gotta take some head for this comment from some girls #whatever  -- Modified on 2/25/2016 10:06:48 AM

nice response
 

Wise beyond your years Ms. Parker. You continue to amaze ...I know, I know..MEH

Ms. Parker, with respect to business and the compatibility of said person what are five questions you would ask yourself before accepting a deal of this nature?  I ask this question because what are the baseline factors that you would consider as a businesswoman. Also I am wondering about you capacity to get along with a person for an extended period of time.  Finally what questions would you have with respect to personal availability and how often would you need to be available.  Also what questions are you asking yourself with respect to a backstory of how you two have met since you very well could be seen with each other in public. Those would be the type of questions one in your capacity would ask when seriously contemplating offers that involve extended and exclusive availability.

and assuming that you REALLY want to do this - and, honestly, I'd start with an overnight - maybe a long weekend after that - and MAYBE a vacation after that....  BUT.

First - ask her if she's interested and outline what you generally have in mind.  If she responds affirmatively - make her an offer for an amount of money that works for you - assuming, of course, that she did not give you a price in her response.  

I have done this a few times for off menu items - and it either gets accepted or I get a counter offer.  Haven't gotten radio silence or flat refusal yet - but that's always a possibility.   You need to get over the whole "fear of rejection" thing.   Bottom Line - she really does just have sex with you for your money - get used to it and embrace it....  If she decides to not see you again because of this - there's another one just around the corner who will be happy to take your benjamins.  Always fun to meet new people!

The offers that I have made seem generous compared to "posted" rates from other, similarly situated providers.  If, for whatever reason, I determine that I can't make such an offer, then I have basically decided that this isn't going to happen....

I either take the counter offer (which I consider to be a "best and final") - or I don't.  The reaction I have gotten so far with that approach has been positive even when the answer was not.   My opinion is that with this approach, I am simply exploring what the price and terms are rather than "haggling".  A churlish person might observe that this is, in fact, what negotiating is.... but I am not one of those people.  Are you?

Assuming that you do in fact spend an overnight with her or some longer periods of time - this would give you a pretty good idea of what a trip is going to cost you.  If not... well, there are a ton of providers with daily rates - that would be a good starting point.  

 

 


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always be a gentlemen, and if al work smile hard, but remember you HOBBYest.  Not a true emotional natural tie to friendship. nothing personal dating going together and engagement and then marriage, normal.
arrangement marriages is good to but always know your part in your life and hers. God gave us sex and relation powers and we all hope to be responsible  with our powers.

spelunker has it right.  ask her, she sets her rates.

to tip!

you don't have to answer right away.

i have two atf's, and i have asked both about taking them (separately) on a weekend up the calif. coast.  oddly enough they both charge me exactly the same for our usual evening dates, and when i asked them about a 4 hour dinner date, they both quoted me a price that was a mere $50 difference.

however when asked about a weekend vacation, one girl quoted me a price that was literally double that of the other girl.*  this is probably because of factors that alyson parker mentioned above:  getting away for a whole weekend can involve different things for different people.  also, it depends on how confident the lady feels about being "on and attractive and sexy" for a period of days as opposed to hours.**

my point is, when both ladies told me their rate, i simply said "thanks, i'll keep that in mind" and have not committed to an actual booking.  i will most probably take the lady who quoted the lower rate for obvious financial reasons.

 
* when i asked the lady who quoted the higher rate about a trip up the coast, the first thing she said was, "you mean like to the wine country?"  

when i asked the other lady who quoted a lower rate, the first thing she said was, "yeah but we'd still f*k too, right?"  so that kind of cinched it in my book.

 
**  i myself am not so sure how sexy i can be for 48 hours straight.  i'm pretty damn ugly in the morning!  lol!  so keep that in mind, too!

eofm, mf!

And it can really be quite fabulous. I won't disclose cost here per trip with me, however, my only sound advice is to be sure you have this all spelled out way before departing. The clearer the communication ( which goes for anything in life) the better the time had by all.  

Enjoy and have fun. I bet you won't go back to any hourly gig again

Gia xo

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Yes Jen, compartmentalization is key to emotional and psychological survival in this game.  If you don't recognize and execute, these necessities then you will be doomed and become an emotional wreck.  This is part of the game and in the end everyone is still going to be out for there on self-interest. Keep in mind that the provider is constantly playing chess and looking three or four moves down the line.  If she makes this one big move, the next question is how is it going to effect her currently lifestyle and daily business. Also will she make enough to compensate for anything she is about to forfeit while being with you.

 

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