First, I think it's probably impossible for most of us to separate what we label spiritual experience from our emotional experience. For many of us, they are one and the same and, when have ineffable experiences, we label them as spiritual although the root almost always is in the emotions.
I think most spirituality centers around connection. The more closely connected we are to someone, something, some idea, the more likely we are to experience it as a spiritual phenomenon. I think there are some, maybe many, people in the hobby who understand this on an intuitive level and are gifted at making these connections and helping each other experience profound connection.
I wonder how many folks here have thought much about the hobby from this perspective. Are there aspects of the hobby that, for you, are spiritual? If so, when and how did you first realize that?
Me first. As weird as it sounds, I was 'called' into the hobby by a very strong intuition which I've learned to listen to. This was at a time when my life had calmed down after several years of real turmoil and heartache and the last thing I wanted was something to complicate my life. My second date was with a woman who is simply amazing in her ability to make the sort of connection I mentioned and, in exploring the relationship with her, I've come to understand much more about how to become more open to making connection and how to withdraw from it, as well. This has enriched other aspects of my life a great deal and isn't that what spirituality is all about?
emotional connections, but only one truly Spiritual connection. That experience touched me to the core and became something other than a Hobby Experience.
That is why you will never see a review of my experience here, because it wasn't something anyone else could even hope to experience and it is something that is too important to me to share here.
Emotion is easy when a beautiful woman is sucking your dick or riding your cock, telling you what a stud you are, but a truly Spiritual connection is rare indeed!
You are the first person on any of the boards to bring up this important question which is central to my experience as a provider. At its best, even with a stranger, sex can be an important spiritual connection. I take the time to get to know my clients because it deepens the emotional and physical sharing and helps raise it to the spiritual level. However, even knowing nothing about the man (or woman) I am with, the pure non-verbal communication often reaches the spiritual plane and causes me to experience something greater than myself: a connection with a higher power, the beauty and majesty of our nurturing earth and our exquisite and unfathomable universe.
I believe that it is no accident that in early pagan religions there was the honored and influential mission of the sacred prostitute who embodied the roles of oricle, priestess and prostitute. You can find plenty of information about this by googling "sacred prostitute."
As for myself, I regard and experience my career as a provider as a religious calling and a spiritual experience. My religion is pagan (Wicca), and there are many other providers who are Wiccan and share my approach to the sacred and spiritual nature of our profession.
Oh yes! Since I've become a provider I've for the first time in my life felt needed and rewarded in what I do. I only wish I'd found this path earlier in my life......but then....all things are as they were meant to be.
We had this very subject come up recently on the SDASP Hobbyist Board when Carrese referred to me as "The Virgin~Whore". Some of the replies were confused about the terminology, so I posted this quote from a book that is considered to be the standing authority on Sacred Sex...
Virgin/Whore Concept As Relates To Sacred Sexuality:
"As the Virgin, woman takes the surrendering role and man acts as the initiator. She is the "clean slate" on which he writes a Karmic message, while she confers and shares her untouchable "pure essence" with him alone. In this role, she embodies conventional love at its most potent level. She is the "pure flower" whose fragrance is his alone to smell.
As the Whore, a woman is in the active role; it is she who acts as the initiatress into the mysteries of love. Without any shame or restraint, she is free to give all of herself to him without any restrictions. In this role, woman embodies unconventional love. Sure of her sexuality, she offers herself in service without reservation, guilt, or insecurity. She must draw on her own special qualities and confer them on her lover.
The virgin, muse, whore, and goddess can all be embodied in a single woman, just as the boy, hero, lover, and god can be found in an individual man. There is today a tendency to separate sexual roles and identify with one to the exclusion of others. This leads to the repression of sexuality and its conversion into fantasy. People then become dishonest about their sexual feelings and instead cover up and create complex psychological problems. Fantasy takes over, feelings become atrophied, and separation inevitably results.
Though fantasy-inspired sexual role playing is in itself harmless, it rarely produces ecstatic experiences unless performed with a clear and shared commitment to a transcendental goal. Frequent concentration on fantasy scenarious during sexual contact commonly leads to boredom and frustration. Sexual union can never be totally fulfilling and consequently unifying unless grounded in a real relationship. The qualities of Virgin and Whore should be incorporated into a relationship for their uplifting and transcendental value."
From the book Sexual Secrets The Alchemy of Ecstasy 20th Anniversary Edition--pgs. 136 & 137
I have an ATF with whom I experience this. We have taken time to get to know each other as people and she and I have shared our thoughts about spirituality--not religion--and I must say it is fantastic. I do not get to see her that often, she is in another city. But when I do it is always a very special experience for me, as I am fulfilled in ways other than just physical that are hard to explain.
I think this is uncanny. I was going to write a post last night about this very topic. It has occured to me a number of times but yesterday I had a very intense connection with an ATF and it got me thinking again about this topic. Thank you for posting this.
I believe that a deep connection between two people that are lost in the sexual union and who are communicating with bodies and touch is very spiritual. It feels to me like I am existing beyond myself (my body). When it happens it is magical. Its the closest I've come to experiencing an out-of-body experience.
Even when the connection is barely there, fucking is deeply spiritual IMHO. The connection with other worlds, death, or whomever you pray to in a fact of our existence. It's when we try to put it words it becomes difficult, clumsy, illusive...
Thanks for posting the topic. As a newbie hobbyist, I'm still trying to reconcile the 3 experiences I had in the past year (there will be far more than 3 in the next year ) In fact, a negative effect of the hobby for me was sleeplessness. I kept thinking of how this strange, beautiful woman could take me into an experience that was beyond fantasy, i.e. spiritual. She had complete contol over me. She would ask me what I wanted to do next and I was unable to answer.
The spillover with my SO has been positive. She doesn't know why the quality of our intimate times are better, but she notices the difference.
This question...and the responses to it so far...remind me of the "old days" on this board. Nice to see a thoughtful, sensitive question posed on here with thought out, sensitive responses in return.
I have had several spiritual experiences with ladies I have met on here. I actually prayed with one in the motel room before we were intimate. The more open you are to the world and the bigger picture, and to life being full of positive, heartfelt moments, the more you can experience things like this. It all comes down to you in the long run.
...Have been ladies that I have met in the hobby. I'm grateful to all of the special women I have known over the past 20 or so years. I truly cherish their willingness to share their sensuality as well as their patience and understanding.
The Goddess says, "All acts of love & pleasure are my ritual." I personally belive that an orgasm is a sacrament. The reason I got into the industry was for the money. The reason I remain is because of my spirituality & the incredible connection I bring to the lives of my boys.
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) In fact, a negative effect of the hobby for me was sleeplessness. I kept thinking of how this strange, beautiful woman could take me into an experience that was beyond fantasy, i.e. spiritual. She had complete contol over me. She would ask me what I wanted to do next and I was unable to answer. 